Denial (Goblin's Kiss Series Book One) (19 page)

“And you are okay with that?” I
asked to confirm his intentions though at this point he seemed all
too eager to get away from me, not closer.

Was it really a
choice or was it some crazy magic that hooked up the
honey
’
s of this world? What if I didn
’
t want to hook up with the likes
of any of them?

His hands stayed
glued to my shoulders curling almost possessively as he whistled
through his teeth in a tight lipped pull and then said, “Emma
Steele, I found you because someone sent me on a mission to take
you and I didn
’
t.”

I waited for him
to show a sigh of remorse like he was sorry for doing it, but it
more seemed like he was sorry for not. I didn
’
t see how this
answered anything. He released my arms and shifted some kind of
weapon around in his pants that finally revealed as a long jagged
knife. How had I missed that?

“I
’
ve never not finished a mission.”

“Oh!
I
’
m
an exception to the Ames Cahn planned out life.”

“I never saw you
coming. But the second I saw you, I was caught in something I
couldn
’
t find my way out of.” The knife was very interesting to him
because he had yet to look back at me as he stroked the handle. I
ignored the delicious shudder that raced over the tops of my
shoulders where his fingers pulled away.

Is that guy talk
for “you
’
re so hot and I gotta have you” or is it
“you
’
re unnatural like me and I have no choice but to be caught in
the trap that I don
’
t want
in
”? Either way, I went with
it.

“I
still don
’
t see the point?” I shook my head confused. "You can't expect
me to believe the princess part any more than the soulmate thing.
Besides, you hate me."

“Emma, dang it.
I can
’
t see reason when with you or even when I
’
m not. I
can
’
t even form sentences. I wasn
’
t talking about anything but just
wanting you. I want you, not the powers. Not anything else but you.
I wanted you safe before the dang cursed connection found its way
to you.”

“So
that
’
s guy talk for I wasn
’
t this mushy before Wednesday and
you want me to accept that you feel some obligation to me. I should
jump up all giddy or something and say to the world, ‘he doesn't
hate me
’.
And be a trophy girl on your wall for being his first
unfinished business.”

“Emma,” he
growled, his voice low and raspy. “I didn
’
t choose
this.”

We
’
re back to the choice thing. I kept my heart in check from
jumping to conclusions. Elizabeth denied her feelings for Mr. Darcy
many times and he eventually came around. Besides, I was still in
denial that I really wanted him and he seemed more confused than
me.

“So you do feel trapped with me,”
I panicked and blurted out before thinking it through.

He pulled me to
him and at the same time the door slammed open with a very
surprised guard. His hands were swift, strong. His breath was warm,
open on my face. He pressed me even to his slouch leaving me
exposed to the wall behind me where I felt it slam against me or
rather me against it. I couldn
’
t comprehend any coherent thought
as the guard apologized profusely and bowed to Ames closing the
door as fast as he opened it.

When he let me
up back for air, I caught that his eyes were bright. Too bright.
What
’
s with the eyes and all these emotions...whatever they are?
It wasn't normal and suspicious wasn't the right word for what I
felt. The hooked up emo inner lingo meant
something.

“What else are
you?” I examined those eyes closer still. He
wasn
’
t completely like me, or Joshlin, or any of these people. If
the "king" and his intentions were true to happen, then I needed an
ally. Ames seemed willing to help. Whether it was for the reason he
liked me or felt obligated, I didn't care. Mostly. I just wanted
out of this now.

The question of
the hour. She knew I wasn
’
t the same as her. Now I would
lose her.

“I
’
m not the same as you. You are the princess of the king who
made a bad decision and acted on it before he thought carefully. He
ended up suffering the consequences. My father worked with him on
some occasions, but they were natural enemies in the end because of
greed on both their parts. I never knew my father well or yours. I
am also what Trigger says...when I need to be.”

“You
’
re skirting the question, Ames.”
Her confidence made my mouth twitch with unwise thoughts for the
moment. She didn
’
t even bat an eye at the fact
that I
’
d killed before.

She had me so
figured out it, it scared me. With eyes down I told her, “I am what
they call a gold miner of sorts, or my ancestors were.
It
’
s
like I told you before, the world you
’
ve lived in for eighteen years
calls them goblins to you.”

“It
’
s not like it escaped my mind, Ames. I
’
m not slow. What
else?” she demanded. Emma stepped back letting my shoulders go
where she now held them. I eyed the door I
’
d hid us behind still scared
of being caught but more to avoid her criticism or laughter that
was sure to come since she already started it up with the small
snicker emitting from her curled up lips.

I left it to her next
move.

She eyed me up
and down stopping on various spots across the length of me that
would not leave her in “good girl” status very long if she kept it
up. She waved a hand all around me and said too sultry like, “This
is not what I pictured for little men in cute hats and licking gold
coins when they snatch them from unsuspecting passerbyers. So tell
me what you
’
re
hiding.
”

Funny, I would
gladly put on a little hat and lick some gold if it would mean I
would get her. “That
’
s all a myth. The gold part only
holds because we used to be in the trade business with it as our
main source. We worked alongside others like us.”

She looked at me for a long time.
“Then why are you in the position you are and what job do you
actually have?” She knew something was off and just dodged around
till she fished it out.

“There was a war. Your
father...and mother were destroyed by the current king.” There. I
would make her hate him. “You obviously see who won. Our people
were taken and made as workers in his realms but many of us
escaped. Joshlin made sure they would suffer.”

We lost so he took their
princess.

I was at the bottom seeing her see
me as weak or at the very worst, less than a man should be. Maybe
the king was better for her even if he was a sleezeball. At least
he could provide for her. What could I give?

Her hand went to
my shoulder giving herself her own calming mechanism by touching
me. I
’
d noticed it on several occasions now, but denied it for my
own. It seemed we both needed it. Perhaps we both held that in
common. The lack of worth. She was worthier than me. “Ames,
I
’
m
sorry.”

What was I thinking?

I wanted her
close. Closer. Mouth, lips. All of it. She was compassionate and
caring. He didn
’
t deserve her no matter what it
took. Even if it wasn
’
t me.

“I need to take you
back.”

“What will happen
next?”

Dinner. “He will announce you for
whom and what you are.”

I
’
m going to be sick.

“I want to go home
now.”

I perked up.
“
You can
’
t.” I had to stick
with the plan.

“I can. And I
will. I
’
m not marrying some pompous idiot who
doesn
’
t even know me or care about me even if he is
hot.”

I stiffened not intending too. She
said he was hot. That freckhead had enough girls he tortured with
his too good looks of persuasion. He could leave this one alone.
Only, this was the one prize that would ensure his reign for a very
long time.

And
Emma didn
’
t even know half of it. King Joshlin didn
’
t know the full extent
of her power yet. That was step two of the plan.

“I will not let
him have you. Stick with the plan of making him think you
aren
’
t powerful at all and would make him work for it. He hates
work.”

She hated it, but she trusted me
for some reason.

It took too long. Five
brain-numbing minutes passed before he showed up for dinner. With a
girl. That would be the icing on the cake to push her away from
him.

I reminded Emma
before we left the small closet room that she needed to harness her
power and appear weak. She didn
’
t like it, but said she would do
it to get out of here. I realized at the door leaving just how
small the closet had been.

In the small broom closet-like
space Ames crashed me into, I felt the immediate fire that burned
inside me when he was close. This kind of reaction never happened
with my ex. Rick was sweet and attentive in the beginning, but kind
of Joshlin-like in the end.

But Ames was
under my skin. I was scared to death about what he might tell me
and when he did—I laughed. I felt so mean. He was crushed by it
too. I was too far gone in the Ames Cahn world whatever he was. We
looked the same. From the same kind of...people. But
he
’
d
said we were different because of his dark history and my lack
thereof. I disagreed but had nothing to back that observation aside
some physical features, magic, and emotional pull. My skin was pale
and his dark from the sun in a glorious tan that any human guy
would kill for. We were the same no matter if we descended from
different places. His piercing eyes of intense depth just kept me
coming back for more even if he hated being here with me. His
speech was not convincing on the "I want you, not the powers" part.
Something in him made him stay, I just didn
’
t know
what.

The insulting part was the king.
He had an agenda. I did wonder if Ames had his own agenda, but
decided it was better to trust someone. He seemed to have my best
interest at hand so I would follow what he asked to get me out of
here. Coming had been a mistake.

“Well, here we
are again,” Joshlin drawled out his voice with a buttery sweetness.
I wasn
’
t falling for it this time. I sat at the table pulled up
without any intentions of eating anything. I crossed my arms on the
table and watched him enter with the same girl from before. She
looked nice and I wondered then why she would hang out with the
king. Maybe she was one of my cousins or
something.

The girl stood
at the corner of the room and didn
’
t join us. Mr. King Joshlin came
and sat right beside me. I eyed Ames and saw his returning stoic
look of non-interest. At least I knew what was behind the poker
face now. He was collectively cross and nervous all in one.
I
’
d
have to start asking if he could sense the same in
me.

We stood silent
while Joshlin retreated from me and made his way around the room
talking to various people, introducing me as he went. Minutes
turned into half an hour before he came back to me. I
wasn
’
t sure if I saw it as an honor or a terror.
Definitely
a
terror.

“Now, has
Officer Cahn schooled you in the facts you seek?”
He wasn
’
t after a bride. He needed a gopher girl. If Ames was right,
he didn't seem the loving, thoughtful kind.