Delusional Love (2nd Edition) (20 page)

She
loved living with Ivan even though they were sleeping in separate bedrooms, but
that was only temporary. Eventually he would be back in her bed. When Ivan
arrived home he did the usual walk to the bar and
  
made a drink. He did not
acknowledge Ashley sitting
in the living
room. “You missed another appointment.” She said disappointed.

“It
couldn’t be helped I had a meeting.”

“Eventually
you are going to have to talk to me.
 
We are having a baby and I don’t want our baby to feel this hostility.”

“I
am not in the mood for this conversation. I have work to do I will be in my
office.”

“I saw
Stephanie today at my doctor’s office.” Ivan stopped in his tracks.

“I
overheard her talking to a really handsome man about starting a family. I think
they just found out they were having a baby. She’s just 5 weeks five weeks but
they looked so happy.” Ivan never turned around he continued to walk to his
office and slammed the door.

I
don’t believe it.
 
I can’t believe
she would sleep with someone so soon after our breakup. He sat in his chair
leaned his elbows on the desk and dropped his head in his hands and rubbed his
eyes. He then laid his head back on the headrest of his chair and closed his
eyes. He still remembered her wonderful scent.
 
He picked up the phone and dialed
Stephanie’s number.

“Hello.”
Stephanie said softly.

“So
I hear congratulations are in order.” She could hear the harshness in his
voice.

“Ivan,
how are you?” She said nervously needing to tell him about the babies.

“I
wanted to call and tell you.”

“Did
you Steph and what were you going to tell me, that you could not keep your God
damn legs closed.
”
He yelled.

“What?”
Stephanie gasped and Ivan continued his tirade.

“We
were only broken up a couple of months and you were already fucking someone
else. Were you even a virgin or was that part of your bullshit lies.”

He
knew she was a virgin when they first made love but he was hurting and he
wanted to hurt her. He continued. “So what did you do Stephanie, screw the
first man who brought you dinner? You just couldn’t wait to fuck your new
friend could you? You were over me so fast that you can just gave it up.”

“You
are a bastard Ivan.” Her voice was shaking and she felt nauseous.
 
‘How
could he believe I would sleep with someone else so soon?’
“I don’t know
where you are getting your information but….”

She
was crying hysterically. Ivan interrupted her before she could finish he did
not want to hear an explanation.

“Just
fucking tell me - are you pregnant?” He yelled in the phone.

“Yes,
but…”

He
interrupted her again he was furious. “Fuck you Stephanie, I’m sorry I ever got
involved with you. Have a good life.”

He
slammed down the phone. His chest tightened he couldn’t breathe. He loosened
his tie in hopes of getting more air into his lungs, but it didn’t work. He closed
his eyes and laid his head back so that he could regulate his breathing.

-----------

Stephanie
hung up the phone, shaking and crying uncontrollably. “What’s wrong Steph?”
Mark asked really concerned.
 
She
was too shaken up to explain right away.

“You
need to calm down Stephanie, breathe baby you are going to make yourself sick.
Who was that on the phone?” She couldn’t answer her breathing was erratic.

“I’m
calling the doctors.”

“No,
I…I’m fine.” She choked out between sobs.

“Who
was that?”

“It was
Ivan. He knows I’m pregnant but he thinks I’m pregnant by you and he would not
let me explain. I have never heard him talk to me like that. He came just short
of calling me a whore.” She grabbed her stomach and started crying again. Mark
sat beside her on the sofa and pulled her into his lap. He cradled her and
rubbed her back until she calmed down. Mark was so angry He wanted to find Ivan
and beat his ass.
‘He doesn’t deserve
her.’
 
He thought. “
Shhh
..... just relax.” He rocked her while rubbing her back
until her breathing was under control. Mark kissed her forehead. “You okay?”

She
responded “No, but I will be.” She got up. “I need go to the bathroom.”

----------

Ashley
couldn’t take it any longer.
‘Did he
believe me?’
She walked to his office door and tried to hear if he was on
the phone. She quietly opened the door. She saw him sitting in the chair with
his head back. Was he crying? Ashley was shocked. In all the time that she had
known him she couldn’t ever remember him crying. She didn’t think he was
capable of such emotion.
‘Over that
bitch, he is crying for that whore.’
She was fuming.
 

He
picked his head up and dialed the phone again. He dialed his brother’s number.
“I need to talk to you” “Ok.” …“I’m on my way.”

‘Who was he talking to? Was that Stephanie?
Why was he so calm?’
 
Panic sat in her body
,
she was momentarily
immobile
.
‘What’s going to happen
when he sees her and she is already showing? He will know that Stephanie is
carrying his baby.’
 
She
regained her sense of awareness, stepped away from the door, and went to her
room.
 
What was she going to
do?
 
She needed to stop him.
 
Just then she heard the front door
close. “Shit,” she dressed quickly and dialed Stephanie’s number. Maybe if she
told her Ivan was on his way over she could warn her so she would not open the
door.
 
A male voice answered the
phone.

“Hello,”
he said and hoped it was Ivan calling back.

“Hello,
you don’t know me but I am Ivan’s fiancée and he is on his way to see
Stephanie. I know he is really angry and it would be best if you made sure he
didn’t see her because I don’t know what he would do.”

“If
he does come here, I can guarantee you his ass will be leaving in an ambulance,
so lady I would advise you to tell him not to make that trip because if he
comes near Stephanie I will fuck him up!”
 
Mark slammed down the phone and tried to console Stephanie.

----------

Ivan
arrived at his bother house. Adam opened the door with a drink ready for Ivan in
his hand. He grabbed the glass and sat on the sofa. They sat in silence for ten
minutes. Adam knew when his brother was ready to talk, he would.

“She’s
pregnant.” Ivan said as he gulped his drink. Adam looked at his brother
confused.

“I
know she’s pregnant that’s why you are in this mess.”

“No
not Ashley, Stephanie, Stephanie is pregnant.” Adam looked at him totally
stunned.

“You
are having another child?” Adam said confused.

“No,
she’s not pregnant by me she’s pregnant by the clown we saw her with in the
restaurant.”

“What
are you talking about?
 
You guys
just broke up.”

“That
was my thought exactly.” Ivan said as he drained his glass and walked over to
the bar to pour another drink. “But I guess Stephanie got over me faster than I
thought.” He said and sipped his new drink and settled back down on the sofa.

“I
am such a fool. I can’t believe I fell in love with that whore.
 
I can’t believe she fucked someone so
fast. Why would she do that to us, to herself?” Ivan heard the hurtful words
coming out of his mouth but he also knew he still loved her. Adam could not
believe the hateful things his brother was saying about Stephanie nor could he
believe what he was hearing about Stephanie.

“Are
you sure?”

“Yes
I called her and she did not deny it.” Something didn’t sound right to Adam.

“How
did you find out?”

“As
it turned out, Ashley and Stephanie go to the same doctor. Talk about a fucking
coincidence.” Adam did not comment but something did not sound right about this
story, he kept his comments to himself until he could prove differently. Ivan
sat and talked to his brother for a while before heading home.

---------

Ashley
sped off heading to Stephanie’s home. She had driven by their many times in the
past to see Ivan’s car sitting outside. She needed to catch him before he
confronted Stephanie.
‘I will not allow
that whore to ruin what I have with Ivan.’

She
loved Ivan and Ivan loved her. Stephanie was not going to come between them.

Ashley
was so preoccupied with getting to Ivan that she drove through the red light
and a SUV slammed into the driver’s side of her car.
 
It spun around and slammed into a
street light
. Everything happened in slow motion for Ashley.
She saw the SUV heading towards her but she could not stop it, the last thing
           
she
remembered was the impact of the other vehicle and the warm and wet feeling
just before she was surrounded in darkness.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Ivan left Adam’s home and decided he needed to see
Stephanie. He just needed to see her, to hear her say that she did not love him
anymore. He really just wanted to hold her and apologize for what he said. God
he still loved her so much so that it hurt. ‘I will just talk to her again, I
want her to tell me to my face that she moved on and that she is truly happy
with her new man.’
 
He arrived at
the door and knocked. After a few seconds Mark answered the door and Ivan’s
mood instantly changed.

“What the fuck do you want? Haven’t you upset her enough?”
Mark spat.

Ivan got in his face.

“I want to see Stephanie.”
 
“Stephanie.” Ivan yelled. “I need to see
you now.”

Mark pushed Ivan away from the door. “What the fuck is your
problem? It’s out of respect for Steph that I don’t whoop your ass right now.”

“I would love to see you try.” Ivan said and looked into
Mark’s eyes each man refused to back down both had fire in their eyes.
 
Mark stepped back inside the doorway and
slammed it in Ivan’s face. Ivan banged on the door and yelled Stephanie’s name
when her neighbors started opening their doors he looked around and realized he
was making a fool out of himself.

“What the hell is wrong with me? Get it together Ivan.” He
said to himself and ran his hand through his hair.
 
‘Walk
away Ivan, just walked away.’
 
Once Ivan reached his car his phone rang and he grabbed it and hoped it
was Stephanie but it was a number he did not recognize. “Hello.” Ivan said
harshly. “Hello I’m looking for a Mr. Quinn.” “This is he.” “Mr. Quinn my name
is Dr. Wright, I am calling from Franklin Memorial Hospital, Ms. Ashley Ross
was brought in by ambulance and she was unconscious. She has you listed as the
contact person; we need you to come in….” Ivan could not hear anything else the
doctor was saying.
‘What was he talking
about Ashley was home in bed.’
 
His
brain was fuzzy and he could hear the person on the phone calling his name.
“Mr. Quinn, Mr. Quinn.” “Yes I’m on my way.” He hung up the phone and
immediately dialed his brother. He arrived at the hospital and questioned the
nurse at the emergency desk; the doctor came out and escorted him to the back
of the emergency room. He was explaining that there was a car accident and
Ashley had lost a lot of blood and they needed to operate and the baby had to
be delivered.

“Wait what are you talking about it’s too soon to deliver
the baby.”
 
Ivan said stunned this
entire ordeal was so surreal. “Ms. Ross suffered a placental abruption.” The
doctor continued to explain but Ivan was having a hard time comprehending what
the doctor was saying.

“Is my baby alive?” He asked the doctor.

----------

Stephanie took a long hot bath and enjoyed the smell of
lavender as she listened to her favorite music on her IPod. At some point she
dozed off and she could hear knocking at the bathroom door. “Steph are you alright?
You’ve been in there almost an hour.” She yelled back that she was fine and
would be out in a few minutes. Stephanie struggled to get out of the tub she
contemplated getting Mark to help her but decided against it. She finally
lifted herself out of the
tub,
towel dried, and
moisturized her body before putting on her pajamas. She exited the bathroom
feeling refreshed.

“Steph we need to talk.” Mark said as she came into the
living room.

“What’s up?” She said feeling better after her confrontation
with Ivan on the phone.

“You had a visitor while you were in the tub. Ivan came by
shouting and demanding to see you. I told him to leave.”

Stephanie did not respond immediately. She really did not
know how to feel. Instantly she felt anger towards Mark for sending Ivan away,
she felt anger towards Ivan for leaving her and treating her like shit. She
still loved Ivan so much that it hurt to think about him, and she loved Mark
for being her protector. This pregnancy
  
had her emotions all over the place.

Breaking the silence, Mark spoke. “You don’t need that kind
of stress Steph, it’s not good for the babies.” Moving the conversation in a
slightly different direction. Mark continued. “Have you thought about what you
are going to do when your due date is close?” Stephanie gave Mark a confused
look.

“Not really, I thought about moving back in with my parents
but I was hoping that would be my last option.”

“I have an idea.” Mark said. “And please think about it
before you give me an answer.” Stephanie looked at him with a raised eyebrow.
“Just hear me out.” Mark pleaded with her. “Why don’t you come and live with
me?”

“No. No. Mark that would not….”

He cut her off before she could finish. “Look, you will be
closer to your parents, but not having to actually move in with them. I have
more than enough room for you and the babies, if you decided to stay after they
are born. Let me take care of you for a while.”

“I can’t do that Mark. This is not your responsibility and I
won’t burden you with it.”

“It’s not a burden, I actually like the idea of helping you
through this. It will give me a chance to atone for the hurt I caused you.”

“Your apology was enough. Thank you for the offer, I love
you for that, but this is a situation that I have to work out with Ivan.”

“Steph…” She cut him off

“No, but thank you for the offer.” She walked over and
kissed him on the cheek.

“Now, let’s see what we can find for a late night snack

before
you head home.” Stephanie said
making it clear that he was not staying the night. Mark went home and Stephanie
settled in bed but could not go to sleep. She thought about Ivan coming to her
home earlier. Maybe he was ready to hear her out.
She looked
at the clock
,
it was eleven o’clock
. I’m sure
he’s still awake
,
maybe I should call him
.
She picked up her cell phone and dialed his number. His phone went straight to
voice mail.

“Hi Ivan, Mark told me you came by, call me I would like to
explain everything to you. Okay, bye.”
 
She hung up the phone and said, “I love you” softly.

-

---------

After Ashley came out of surgery, Ivan and Samantha waited
in the recovery room to see her. The doctor informed them that the surgery was
successful and they were able to control the bleeding. The next forty- eight
hours would be tricky for both Ashley and the baby and if they pulled through
their chances of a full recovery would greatly improve. Ivan called his family
to let them know about the baby and Ashley. Ivan’s mom wanted to come and help out
but Ivan told her not to come, he said he would keep her informed. Ivan spent
the next several days at the hospital. He had Betty bring him files to work on
and had her retrieve the messages from his phone. Betty came by the hospital
daily to deliver Ivan’s files and his messages.

He quickly shuffled through the messages and weeded out the
ones that he had to return right away when he came across Stephanie’s message.
She called him the day of the accident, the day he showed up at her apartment
and was greeted by her new boyfriend. He balled the message up and decided
against throwing it away instead he stuck it in his pocket.
 
Later that evening he called Stephanie.
She answered after two rings.

“Hello.” She said softly.

“Hello Stephanie.” Ivan said coldly. “How are you Ivan?”

“I’m fine.”

There was awkward silence.

“I miss you.” She said softly wanting him to know how she
felt.

“Yeah well it didn’t take you long to get over me. I’m
returning your call and I don’t have much time so what did you want?”

“I wanted to talk to you about my pregnancy. I think you got
the wrong impression.”

“Look Stephanie I don’t have time to listen to your
explanation about your pregnancy that is not my concern. I have more pressing
things to deal with, take care of
yourself
. Goodbye
Stephanie.”

“I still love you.” She said just above a whisper.

He felt a pang in his chest. He wanted to yell that he loved
her too, but he couldn’t.

“Yeah well sometimes love can be delusional.” He hung up the
phone and returned to Ashley’s room.

---------

Stephanie met the girls at Sonny’s Restaurant. It felt like
forever since the last time they went out together. “Look at you Steph, I can’t
believe how much weight you gained. Those babies are growing leaps and bounds,
but you are glowing baby girl, motherhood is agreeing with you. How do you
feel?” Tara asked. “I’m feeling pretty good considering I look like I’m
carrying four babies instead of two.”

They ordered their food and Brianna turned to Stephanie.

“So have you talked to Ivan? Does he know about the twins?”

“No, I tried to talk to him and he freaked out on me and
accused me of whoring around and getting pregnant by Mark. Even after I let him
calm down and tried to explain again he went on his rant again. You know what,
I’m tired of trying to kiss Ivan’s ass to accept my babies. He is the one who
chose her over me, he chose her, so as far as I’m concerned I don’t owe him a
goddamn thing, let alone an explanation of my pregnancy. He should know after everything
we’ve been through that I would not sleep with someone so soon after breaking
up with him, let alone get pregnant by someone else.”

“Steph, he still needs to know about the babies.”

“Look, that’s my decision, not yours and I say fuck him. He
left me; he hurt me, just walked away like I meant nothing to him after I gave
him everything. He is choosing to marry her because she is pregnant.” A single
tear rolled down her cheek. “I loved him so much and he just kept stomping on
my heart. I can’t keep being his doormat and I definitely don’t want him back
in my life out of obligation.”

“Alright Steph, don’t get upset, it’s your decision and
we’ll support you on whatever you decide.” Tara said and tried to sooth her.

“Good, because I decided to move to Miami with Mark until
the babies are born.”

“WHAT?” Brianna and Tara said in unison.

“
Awh
hell no, I will support you
in everything but that. Has this pregnancy caused you to lose your mind?” Tara
said angrily.

“Stephanie you can’t do this, you need to think this
through. Don’t you remember how bad he hurt you? Think Steph, you are leaving
one heartache for another, stay here with us, we will make sure that you are
taken care of.” Brianna pleaded with her.

You know we’ve got your back in anything that you need. You
can move in with me, I have more than enough room.” Brianna said.

“I can’t impose on you like that.” Stephanie said.

“But you can impose on that bastard that broke your heart. Do
you remember the bad shape you were in when you found out he was cheating on
you? We sure as hell do. He screwed you over and never looked back. Don’t do
this to yourself baby girl you are just setting yourself up for more hurt.”
Tara said.

“I appreciate what you guys are saying but I don’t have
feelings for Mark like that anymore, we are friends and he extended the
invitation as friends and nothing more.” Stephanie did not want to go into how
Mark said this would give him a chance to make up for the hurt he caused her
because they would just twist his words into some ulterior motive, “In the end,
it’s my decision and I have given it serious consideration. I don’t think I can
stay in town while he marries her and gives her the life I thought we would have
together.”

“You are treading in dangerous territory Steph, seriously
think about this before you go down that road. When Ivan finds out about his
babies, and oh…. trust me, he will find out, there is going to be a major fall
out that will destroy whatever’s left of your relationship with him.” Brianna
said.

“He already destroyed our relationship when he said
goodbye.” Their food arrived and they ate in silence. As they were leaving the
restaurant Stephanie turned to her friends.

“I love you guys and I will think about it and let you guys
know what I decide.”

Stephanie went home, took a shower,
laid
down and tried to weigh all her options. Financially she would be okay until
the babies were born, but she would need help for the first couple of months. ‘I
can’t stay here and be constantly reminded of his decision.’
 
Stephanie dozed after making a decision.

---------

“Hey Mark, how’s the moving going?” Stephanie asked after
she called him the next morning.

“Done. Actually I just completed settlement on my house and
I’m flying out to Miami next week.” There were a few seconds of silence.
 
“Is everything okay Steph?”