Delphi Complete Works of the Brontes Charlotte, Emily, Anne Brontë (Illustrated) (569 page)

‘We are all separated now, and winning our bread amongst strangers as we can — my sister Anne is near York, my brother in a situation near Halifax, I am here.  Emily is the only one left at home, where her usefulness and willingness make her indispensable.  Under these circumstances should we repine?  I think not — our mutual affection ought to comfort us under all difficulties.  If the God on whom we must all depend will but vouchsafe us health and the power to continue in the strict line of duty, so as never under any temptation to swerve from it an inch, we shall have ample reason to be grateful and contented.

‘I do not pretend to say that I am always contented.  A governess must often submit to have the heartache.  My employers, Mr. and Mrs. White, are kind worthy people in their way, but the children are indulged.  I have great difficulties to contend with sometimes.  Perseverance will perhaps conquer them.  And it has gratified me much to find that the parents are well satisfied with their children’s improvement in learning since I came.  But I am dwelling too much upon my own concerns and feelings.  It is true they are interesting to me, but it is wholly impossible they should be so to you, and, therefore, I hope you will skip the last page, for I repent having written it.

 
‘A fortnight since I had a letter from Ellen urging me to go to Brookroyd for a single day.  I felt such a longing to have a respite from labour, and to get once more amongst “old familiar faces,” that I conquered diffidence and asked Mrs. White to let me go.  She complied, and I went accordingly, and had a most delightful holiday.  I saw your mother, your sisters Mercy, Ellen, and poor Sarah, and your brothers Richard and George — all were well.  Ellen talked of endeavouring to get a situation somewhere.  I did not encourage the idea much.  I advised her rather to go to Earnley for a while.  I think she wants a change, and I dare say you would be glad to have her as a companion for a few months. — I remain, yours respectfully,

‘C. Brontë.’

The above letter was written to Miss Nussey’s brother, whose attachment to Charlotte Brontë has already more than once been mentioned in the current biographies.  The following letter to Miss Nussey is peculiarly interesting because of the reference to Ireland.  It would have been strange if Charlotte Brontë had returned as a governess to her father’s native land.  Speculation thereon is sufficiently foolish, and yet one is tempted to ask if Ireland might not have gained some of that local literary colour — one of its greatest needs — which always makes Scotland dear to the readers of
Waverley
, and Yorkshire classic ground to the admirers of
Shirley
.

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

‘Upperwood House,
June
10
th
, 1841.

‘Dear Nell, — If I don’t scrawl you a line of some sort I know you will begin to fancy that I neglect you, in spite of all I said last time we met.  You can hardly fancy it possible, I dare say, that I cannot find a quarter of an hour to scribble a note in; but when a note is written it is to be carried a mile to the post, and consumes nearly an hour, which is a large portion of the day.  Mr. and Mrs. White have been gone a week.  I heard from them this morning; they are now at Hexham.  No
 
time is fixed for their return, but I hope it will not be delayed long, or I shall miss the chance of seeing Anne this vacation.  She came home, I understand, last Wednesday, and is only to be allowed three weeks’ holidays, because the family she is with are going to Scarborough.  I should like to see her to judge for myself of the state of her health.  I cannot trust any other person’s report, no one seems minute enough in their observations.  I should also very much have liked you to see her.

‘I have got on very well with the servants and children so far, yet it is dreary, solitary work.  You can tell as well as me the lonely feeling of being without a companion.  I offered the Irish concern to Mary Taylor, but she is so circumstanced that she cannot accept it.  Her brothers have a feeling of pride that revolts at the thought of their sister “going out.”  I hardly knew that it was such a degradation till lately.

‘Your visit did me much good.  I wish Mary Taylor would come, and yet I hardly know how to find time to be with her.  Good-bye.  God bless you.

‘C. Brontë.

‘I am very well, and I continue to get to bed before twelve o’clock p.m.  I don’t tell people that I am dissatisfied with my situation.  I can drive on; there is no use in complaining.  I have lost my chance of going to Ireland.’

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

‘Haworth,
July
1
st
, 1841.

‘Dear Nell, — I was not at home when I got your letter, but I am at home now, and it feels like paradise.  I came last night.  When I asked for a vacation, Mrs. White offered me a week or ten days, but I demanded three weeks, and stood to my tackle with a tenacity worthy of yourself, lassie.  I gained the point, but I don’t like such victories.  I have gained another point.  You are unanimously requested to come here next Tuesday and stay as long as you can.  Aunt is in high good-humour.  I need not write a long letter. — Good-bye, dear Nell.

‘C. B.

‘
P.S.
— I have lost the chance of seeing Anne.  She is gone back to “The land of Egypt and the house of bondage.”  Also, little black Tom is dead.  Every cup, however sweet, has its drop
 
of bitterness in it.  Probably you will be at a loss to ascertain the identity of black Tom, but don’t fret about it, I’ll tell you when you come.  Keeper is as well, big, and grim as ever.  I’m too happy to write.  Come, come, lassie.’

It must have been during this holiday that the resolution concerning a school of their own assumed definite shape.  Miss Wooler talked of giving up Dewsbury Moor — should Charlotte and Emily take it?  Charlotte’s recollections of her illness there settled the question in the negative, and Brussels was coming to the front.

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

‘Upperwood House,
October
17
th
, 1841.

‘Dear Nell, — It is a cruel thing of you to be always upbraiding me when I am a trifle remiss or so in writing a letter.  I see I can’t make you comprehend that I have not quite as much time on my hands as Miss Harris or Mrs. Mills.  I never neglect you on purpose.  I could not
do
it, you little teazing, faithless wretch.

‘The humour I am in is worse than words can describe.  I have had a hideous dinner of some abominable spiced-up indescribable mess and it has exasperated me against the world at large.  So you are coming home, are you?  Then don’t expect me to write a long letter.  I am not going to Dewsbury Moor, as far as I can see at present.  It was a decent friendly proposal on Miss Wooler’s part, and cancels all or most of her little foibles, in my estimation; but Dewsbury Moor is a poisoned place to me; besides, I burn to go somewhere else.  I think, Nell, I see a chance of getting to Brussels.  Mary Taylor advises me to this step.  My own mind and feelings urge me.  I can’t write a word more.

‘C. B.’

TO MISS EMILY J. BRONTË

‘Upperwood House, Rawdon,
‘
Nov
. 7
th
, 1841.

‘Dear E. J., — You are not to suppose that this note is written with a view of communicating any information on the subject we
 
both have considerably at heart: I have written letters but I have received no letters in reply yet.  Belgium is a long way off, and people are everywhere hard to spur up to the proper speed.  Mary Taylor says we can scarcely expect to get off before January.  I have wished and intended to write to both Anne and Branwell, but really I have not had time.

‘Mr. Jenkins I find was mistakenly termed the British Consul at Brussels; he is in fact the English Episcopal clergyman.

‘I think perhaps we shall find that the best plan will be for papa to write a letter to him by and bye, but not yet.  I will give an intimation when this should be done, and also some idea of what had best be said.  Grieve not over Dewsbury Moor.  You were cut out there to all intents and purposes, so in fact was Anne, Miss Wooler would hear of neither for the first half year.

‘Anne seems omitted in the present plan, but if all goes right I trust she will derive her full share of benefit from it in the end.  I exhort all to hope.  I believe in my heart this is acting for the best, my only fear is lest others should doubt and be dismayed.  Before our half year in Brussels is completed, you and I will have to seek employment abroad.  It is not my intention to retrace my steps home till twelve months, if all continues well and we and those at home retain good health.

‘I shall probably take my leave of Upperwood about the 15th or 17th of December.  When does Anne talk of returning?  How is she?  What does W. W.
  
say to these matters?  How are papa and aunt, do they flag?  How will Anne get on with Martha?  Has W. W. been seen or heard of lately?  Love to all.  Write quickly. — Good-bye.

‘C. Brontë.

‘I am well.’

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

‘Rawdon,
December
10
th
, 1841.

‘My dear Ellen, — I hear from Mary Taylor that you are come home, and also that you have been ill.  If you are able to write comfortably, let me know the feelings that preceded your illness, and also its effects.  I wish to see you.  Mary Taylor
 
reports that your looks are much as usual.  I expect to get back to Haworth in the course of a fortnight or three weeks.  I hope I shall then see you.  I would rather you came to Haworth than I went to Brookroyd.  My plans advance slowly and I am not yet certain where I shall go, or what I shall do when I leave Upperwood House.  Brussels is still my promised land, but there is still the wilderness of time and space to cross before I reach it.  I am not likely, I think, to go to the Château de Kockleberg.  I have heard of a less expensive establishment.  So far I had written when I received your letter.  I was glad to get it.  Why don’t you mention your illness.  I had intended to have got this note off two or three days past, but I am more straitened for time than ever just now.  We have gone to bed at twelve or one o’clock during the last three nights.  I must get this scrawl off to-day or you will think me negligent.  The new governess, that is to be, has been to see my plans, etc.  My dear Ellen, Good-bye. — Believe me, in heart and soul, your sincere friend,

‘C. B.’

TO MISS ELLEN NUSSEY

‘
December
17
th
, 1841.

‘My dear Ellen, — I am yet uncertain when I shall leave Upperwood, but of one thing I am very certain, when I do leave I must go straight home.  It is absolutely necessary that some definite arrangement should be commenced for our future plans before I go visiting anywhere.  That I wish to see you I know, that I intend and
hope
to see you before long I also know, that you will at the first impulse accuse me of neglect, I fear, that upon consideration you will acquit me, I devoutly trust.  Dear Ellen, come to Haworth if you can, if you cannot I will endeavour to come for a day at least to Brookroyd, but do not depend on this — come to Haworth.  I thank you for Mr. Jenkins’ address.  You always think of other people’s convenience, however ill and affected you are yourself.  How very much I wish to see you, you do not know; but if I were to go to Brookroyd now, it would deeply disappoint those at home.  I have some hopes of seeing Branwell at Xmas, and when
 
I shall be able to see him afterwards I cannot tell.  He has never been at home for the last five months. — Good-night, dear Ellen,

‘C. B.’

TO MISS MERCY NUSSEY

‘Rawdon,
December
17
th
.

‘My dear Miss Mercy, — Though I am very much engaged I must find time to thank you for the kind and polite contents of your note.  I should act in the manner most consonant with my own feelings if I at once, and without qualification, accepted your invitation.  I do not however consider it advisable to indulge myself so far at present.  When I leave Upperwood I must go straight home.  Whether I shall afterwards have time to pay a short visit to Brookroyd I do not yet know — circumstances must determine that.  I would fain see Ellen at Haworth instead; our visitations are not shared with any show of justice.  It shocked me very much to hear of her illness — may it be the first and last time she ever experiences such an attack!  Ellen, I fear, has thought I neglected her, in not writing sufficiently long or frequent letters.  It is a painful idea to me that she has had this feeling — it could not be more groundless.  I know her value, and I would not lose her affection for any probable compensation I can imagine.  Remember me to your mother.  I trust she will soon regain her health. — Believe me, my dear Miss Mercy, yours sincerely,