Read Delphi Complete Works of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (Illustrated) Online
Authors: SIR ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE
This comic opera was written in 1893 by Barrie and Arthur Conan Doyle (of
Sherlock Holmes
fame), with music by Ernest Ford, a conductor and occasional composer.
When the Gilbert and Sullivan partnership disbanded after the production of
The Gondoliers
in 1889, impresario Richard D’Oyly Carte was forced to find new works to present at the Savoy Theatre.
Barrie
was then a journalist and a novelist with a few popular books to his credit. He had not yet created his classic
Peter Pan
, and his only stage productions included a biography that closed after one night, a parody of new-to-London Henrik Ibsen, and in 1892 his first real success,
Walker
,
London
for Toole’s Theatre.
Barrie
brought his idea for
Jane Annie
to D’Oyly Carte, who suggested that Arthur Sullivan collaborate with him, but Sullivan suggested his former pupil Ford, instead. Ford had composed several operettas, including the one-act Mr. Jericho (premiered at the
Savoy
in 1893).
Barrie
did not finish the libretto, suffering a nervous breakdown. His friend Conan Doyle was already popular for his Sherlock Holmes mysteries and so he took on the job of finishing the opera.
The original programme
JANE ANNIE;
or, The Good Conduct Prize.
A New and Original English Comic Opera [in Two Acts]
written by J.M. Barrie and Arthur Conan Doyle
music by Ernest Ford
A Proctor
Sim (Bulldog)
Greg (Bulldog)
Tom (a Press Student)
Jack (a Warrior)
Caddie (a Page)
Miss Sims (a Schoolmistress)
Jane Annie (a Good Girl)
Bab (a Bad Girl)
Milly (an Average Girl)
Rose (an Average Girl)
Meg (an Average Girl)
Maud (an Average Girl)
Schoolgirls, Press Students, and Lancers.
The Scene is obviously laid round the corner from a certain
English
University
Town
.
ACT I.
First Floor of a Seminary for the Little Things
that grow into Women.
ACT II.
A Ladies’ Golf Green near the Seminary.
TIME.
The Present.
One Night elapses between the Acts.
The Opera produced under the Stage Direction of Mr. Charles
Harris and the Musical Direction of Mr. Francois Cellier.
* Caddie’s explanatory notes are included in an appendix and
indicated in the text by numbers in square brackets [ ] that
correspond to the point in the libretto where they appear.
SCENE. — First floor of the Ladies’ Seminary. The GIRLS are
exchanging their last confidences for the night. Enter CADDIE
with their candles.
CHORUS OF GIRLS.
Good-night! Good-night!
The hour is late;
Though eyes are bright,
No longer wait!
Though clear the head,
Though wit may shine,
To bed! To bed!
It’s nearly nine!
Dining-room clock strikes.
MILLY.
Now the last faint tint has faded.
ALL.
Good-night! Good-night!
MILLY.
And the west in gloom is shaded.
ALL.
Good-night! Good-night!
MILLY.
See the moon her vigil keeping.
ALL.
Good-night! Good-night!
MILLY.
Torpor o’er the earth is creeping
ALL.
Good-night! Good-night!
Drawing-room clock strikes.
ALL.
Good-night! Good-night!
A-talking thus,
Though eyes are bright,
Is not for us.
The eve is past,
The shadows fall,
And so at last
Good-night to all.
All retire except CADDIE, who is roused from a profound reverie
by the misbehaviour of the clock. He makes short work of it. Exit
CADDIE.
There is a knock at the door, and the GIRLS reappear.
MEG. It was the front door!
MILLY. Who can be calling at such a fearsomely late hour as
nine o’clock?
ROSE.
Why doesn’t some one peep down the stairs.
BAB runs downstairs.
MAUD.
That bold Bab has gone. Miss Sims will catch her.
MILLY. Oh! I can see. (Looks over staircase.)
ALL. Well?
MILLY. A man!
ROSE.
At last!
MILLY. Bald!
ROSE.
The wretch!
MILLY. He has two other men with him.
MEG. Two! Girls, let us go and do our hair this instant.
MILLY. They are shewn into Miss Sims’s private room. Ah!
MAUD.
What?
MILLY. The door is shut.
ROSE.
What a shame!
MEG. What is Bab doing all this time?
MILLY. She has her ear at the keyhole.
MAUD.
Dear girl!
MILLY. She shakes her fist at the keyhole.
ALL. Why?
MILLY. I don’t know.
BAB comes upstairs.
ROSE.
Bab, why did you shake your fist at the keyhole?
BAB. Because it is stuffed with paper.
ALL. Oh!
BAB. Yes, stuffed. How mean of Miss Sims. She might surely
have trusted to our honour not to look.
MILLY. Thank goodness, the holidays begin the day after to-
morrow.
BAB. But a great deal may happen before to-morrow. Girls,
can you keep a secret — a secret that will freeze your
blood and curl you up and make you die of envy?
ALL. Yes, yes!
BAB. That little sneak Jane Annie is not here?
MILLY. She has gone upstairs to bed.
BAB. You are sure?
ROSE.
I’ll make sure. (Runs upstairs and looks through
keyhole.) It’s all right, girls! I can see her curling
her eyelashes with a hairpin.
GIRLS surround BAB.
BAB. Then, girls, what do you value most in the world?
MILLY. My curls.
MEG. My complexion.
ROSE.
My diamond ring.
MAUD.
My cousin Dick.
BAB. Well, Meg would be delighted her complexion fair to
doff,
And Milly take her scissors and cut her tresses off,
And Rose with a careless “Take it” give up her diamond
quick,
And Maud would soon surrender her rights in Cousin
Dick,
To be me to-night!
MILLY. What is his name?
BAB. Jack.
MAUD.
A lovely name! What are you and Jack to do?
JANE ANNIE steals downstairs.
BAB. This very night we have —
ALL. You have — ?
BAB. Arranged to el —
ALL. To el — (seeing JANE ANNIE.) Oh!
JANE ANNIE comes forward. All turn their backs on her.
JANE A. What have you arranged to do to-night, Bab? What is it,
Maud? tell me, Milly.
ROSE.
You used to be the worst girl in the school, Jane
Annie, and I believe you have become a sneak to win the
good-conduct prize.
MILLY. When it is presented to her to-morrow, I shall hiss.
JANE A. What is your secret, Bab?
BAB. Oh, I should like to pinch you!
JANE A. Just because I am a good girl.
SONG. — JANE ANNIE.
I’m not a sneak for praise or pelf,
But when they’re acting badly,
I want to make them like myself,
And so I tell tales gladly.
Just because I am a good girl.
ALL.
She gives her reasons thus,
But it’s rather hard on us,
To suffer just because she is a good girl.
JANE ANNIE. I told Miss Sims they read in bed,
Although with guile they cloaked it,
And when her cane chair vanished,
I told her they had smoked it,
And all because I am a good girl.
ALL.
And all because she is a good girl.
JANE ANNIE. Although misunderstood, I’m meek —
Bab, pinch me, pinch me well!
(BAB pinches her.)
Thanks! Next I offer you my cheek.
(BAB slaps her.)
Now, dear, I’ll go and tell.
And just because I am a good girl.
ALL.
She gives her reasons thus,
But it’s rather hard on us,
To suffer just because she is a good girl.
JANE A. If I liked I could make Bab tell me her secret. Beware!
I have a power by which, if I chose to use it, I can
make any one do anything I like.
MILLY
(scoffing). Then why don’t you use it?
JANE A. Because I am a good girl.
Exit JANE ANNIE downstairs.
ROSE.
Do you think she has such a power?
MILLY. Of course not.
MEG. Still, Jane Annie could not tell a lie.
MILLY. You mistake. It was George Washington who could not
tell a lie.
MEG. So it was. How stupid of me.
MAUD.
Quick, Bab, your secret?
ALL. Yes — the secret!
BAB. Girls, this is my secret. Meg, watch! Jack is a
soldier, and he loves me.
ALL. Oh!
BAB. But better still — I have two lovers.
MILLY. Do they hate each other?
BAB. Yes.
MILLY. Scrumptious!