Defiance (10 page)
Authors: Lili St Crow
Because when I got going this fast, and I tried to hurt him, it made me forget—for just a few minutes a night—everything nasty and painful. Everything bad.
The aspect turned to a cloak of warm prickles instead of oil, my teeth aching and sensitive, and he spun in midair. It was one of the things human bodies aren’t supposed to do, but he’s
djamphir
. Physics and gravity don’t mean the same things to him that they do to—
djamphir
. Physics and gravity don’t mean the same things to him that they do to—
I didn’t see how he hit me. One second I was kicking his ass while he was in midair, the next dynamite went off inside my head. I came to with my ears ringing and Christophe’s arms around me as he knelt on the mats.
“You’re getting better. No, don’t try to get up.” He pushed a curl out of my face. “Just lie still for a moment.”
I don’t know why he said that; I wasn’t trying to go anywhere. I blinked, and the world rolled back up to speed. I tasted hot copper, and hoped I wasn’t bleeding anywhere.
But wouldn’t you know, I guess it just wasn’t my night. A thin trickle of something warm slid down from my nose. Christophe swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing, and the aspect slipped through his hair like dark fingers.
I stared at him, my heart beating thinly. Rapid fluttering beats, like a hummingbird’s wings. His fever-hot fingers brushed my upper lip, wiping at the blood.
My
blood. Full of happy stuff that drove boy
djamphir
crazy.
blood. Full of happy stuff that drove boy
djamphir
crazy.
My arms and legs wouldn’t obey me. We were alone in here, and if he went nuts over the happy stuff in my blood there was no way I could—
I shouldn’t have worried.
He lifted his fingers to his mouth. Closed his eyes and licked them clean. I struggled to move, and his other hand—he had one arm underneath me, holding me up—bit down, fingers like slim iron bands.
I should have been terrified. But instead I only felt a sleepy sort of alarm. As if I was in a dream that wasn’t too terribly important.
Christophe leaned down. His eyes were still tightly shut, and his lips met my cheek. They grazed the surface of my skin, lightly, and I felt the sharp points of his fangs, scraping just a little.
Then he kissed me.
Each time our mouths met, it was the same. Lightning crackled through me, and I forgot everything else. The only thing I remembered was
him
, his arms around me and the taste of him like night in the desert, spice and sand and fading heat. One of his fangs brushed mine and a jolt of pleasure slammed down my throat. The bloodhunger bloomed, and my fingers were in his hair, twisting and tangling. My arms tensed, and for a moment I quivered on the edge of action—wrenching his head back, kissing down the line of his jaw, and burying those dainty little fangs in his throat. My entire body curved, strength welling back up, and I struggled against the part of me that wanted to rip out a chunk of his flesh and
drink
.
him
, his arms around me and the taste of him like night in the desert, spice and sand and fading heat. One of his fangs brushed mine and a jolt of pleasure slammed down my throat. The bloodhunger bloomed, and my fingers were in his hair, twisting and tangling. My arms tensed, and for a moment I quivered on the edge of action—wrenching his head back, kissing down the line of his jaw, and burying those dainty little fangs in his throat. My entire body curved, strength welling back up, and I struggled against the part of me that wanted to rip out a chunk of his flesh and
drink
.
Christophe’s mouth slid free of mine, regretfully. He pulled away, despite my hands trying to keep him. I realized I was making a small sound in the back of my throat, a little mewling. “It’s all right,” he whispered. “Shhh, it’s all right. It’s just the hunger. It’s not you. You have control,
kochana
.”
kochana
.”
It was nice of him to say it. Because really, I didn’t think I did. My lips burned, my teeth tingled, and I shook like I was cold. But at least I didn’t try to jerk forward and bite him.
I wanted to. I was stronger than the urge, though. By only a few millimeters, but it was something.
My fingers cramped. We were both bleeding, and the smell of it stroked that rough spot on my palate, right next to the little place that warned me of danger. I swallowed, but that just made it worse. Spit wasn’t what that place wanted. It wanted what was beating through his veins. It was even worse because I knew how good it tasted.
I knew what it was like to drink his blood, desert spice and wind through car windows, thunderstorm looming and the accelerator pressed to the floor.
He tasted like freedom.
Christophe stroked my hair, not caring that I was pulling on his. I tried to make my fingers let go, but they wouldn’t. It had to be uncomfortable, but he looked strangely peaceful. His mouth had relaxed, and his eyes were still closed. “It’s all right,” he repeated quietly. “Shhh,
skowroneczko moja
,
moja ksiezniczko
, little bird. All’s well. Hush.”
skowroneczko moja
,
moja ksiezniczko
, little bird. All’s well. Hush.”
I rushed back into myself fully with a thud, shoving the blood-hunger back in its box. Dusk light was fading in the high windows; I
felt
it retreating like a huge staticky sound draining out of the sky. My breath came in ragged gasps, and I was sweating. My tank top was all twisted around under my hoodie; I had no idea how
that
had happened. Plus the chain that held the locket was all twisted up too, digging into my skin.
felt
it retreating like a huge staticky sound draining out of the sky. My breath came in ragged gasps, and I was sweating. My tank top was all twisted around under my hoodie; I had no idea how
that
had happened. Plus the chain that held the locket was all twisted up too, digging into my skin.
“Very good.” He sounded pleased. Kept stroking my hair. “
Very
good. You’ve acquired more control. Now, how do you suppose I defeated you?”
Very
good. You’ve acquired more control. Now, how do you suppose I defeated you?”
My mouth opened. Nothing but a dry husk of a cough came out. I coughed again, trying to get the taste out of my throat. It didn’t work. Only time and getting calmed down would do it.
He waited while I cleared my throat several times. My fingers relaxed. It was work to make them slip out of his hair, especially when they kept wanting to grab and pull his pulse closer to my fangs.
Running with wulfen was one thing. Getting fangs was another. I struggled with myself.
Steady, Dru. Steady.
Steady, Dru. Steady.
“I had you,” I finally managed to get out. “Then you cheated.”
I felt like a hoser even saying it. Cheating is the name of the game when it comes to winning fights, right? You don’t fight fair. You fight to
win
.
win
.
It shouldn’t have been possible for him to look more pleased, but he managed it. “Well, I had to. You forced me into it.”
That was high praise, from him. “Great.” I didn’t feel like celebrating. I felt like every bit of me had been pulled apart and put back together wrong. I was
exhausted
. Jesus, I couldn’t wait to finally bloom if it would stop this sort of thing from happening. My mouth kept merrily going, though, independently of my brain. “Are you going to do that every time the hunger hits?”
exhausted
. Jesus, I couldn’t wait to finally bloom if it would stop this sort of thing from happening. My mouth kept merrily going, though, independently of my brain. “Are you going to do that every time the hunger hits?”
Then I could have slapped my own forehead. It sounded like a cheap come-on line.
“Would you like me to?” Another one of those happy smiles, and his eyes snapped open. The blue took me by surprise, as always, and my fingers slid completely free of his hair. We were both probably a mess, but the aspect was already shrinking his bruises and turning off his bleeding. My nose had stopped bleeding, too, thank God. But I’d still need some time in the baths to get rid of the worst of it.
Yep. Couldn’t
wait
to bloom. “Nah, that’s okay.” I felt like I could move now. Various muscles ached and twinged, and Christophe had to steady me. “Ouch. I need some aspirin.”
wait
to bloom. “Nah, that’s okay.” I felt like I could move now. Various muscles ached and twinged, and Christophe had to steady me. “Ouch. I need some aspirin.”
He nodded. “And some food, probably. You were in the aspect for a bit, there. It was hard to keep ahead of you.
Svetocha
are generally very fast.”
Svetocha
are generally very fast.”
I’m fast enough to play rabbit, too.
Still, his praise almost made me blush. “How many have you trained?” I tried not to look too interested. Sometimes he wouldn’t talk about his personal past.
Still, his praise almost made me blush. “How many have you trained?” I tried not to look too interested. Sometimes he wouldn’t talk about his personal past.
He had a funny idea of what “personal past” meant, too. Of course, he was older. Like, way way older.
It was kind of weird. Check that, it was
really
weird. Sometimes, when I remembered just how old he was, it was downright unsettling. I mean, he’d known my
mother
. And my hormones were jumping up and down all the time. And he was just so . . . so . . .
really
weird. Sometimes, when I remembered just how old he was, it was downright unsettling. I mean, he’d known my
mother
. And my hormones were jumping up and down all the time. And he was just so . . . so . . .
I couldn’t come up with a word for what he was.
“Three. Including you, my dear.” He set me on my feet and let go of me. I tried not to feel bereft. At least when he was that close, I felt like nothing nasty could get to me.
Things like that will do something funny to a girl’s head, I guess. “My mother. Me. And . . . Anna?” It wasn’t so much of a shot in the dark. They had to have spent
some
time together, right?
some
time together, right?
Them being an item for a while, however long ago.
“Training didn’t interest
her
much.” He shrugged. Even with dried blood and bruising all over his face, he looked perfectly finished. It was as if the blood was just decorating him. “But I tried as best I could. Nothing else a Kuoroi can do, when faced with a
svetocha
.”
her
much.” He shrugged. Even with dried blood and bruising all over his face, he looked perfectly finished. It was as if the blood was just decorating him. “But I tried as best I could. Nothing else a Kuoroi can do, when faced with a
svetocha
.”
What’s that supposed to mean?
I spotted my sticks, flung halfway across the gym. One of them was a splinter-chewed mess. “Jeez. I’ll need new ones, again. Good thing we weren’t practicing with real
malaika
.”
I spotted my sticks, flung halfway across the gym. One of them was a splinter-chewed mess. “Jeez. I’ll need new ones, again. Good thing we weren’t practicing with real
malaika
.”
“Real
malaika
are just for forms practice for now. In six months or so, you’ll be ready to spar with them.” He was already striding away in search of his own weapons.
malaika
are just for forms practice for now. In six months or so, you’ll be ready to spar with them.” He was already striding away in search of his own weapons.
“Six
months
?” My voice bounced off the bleachers, and the fluorescents hanging overhead flickered unevenly.
But it’s been weeks already, and I have to . . .
I stopped dead, looking up at the lights, brushing a curl out of my face. Even one of Nathalie’s braids would lose a few strands when faced with a fight with Christophe.
months
?” My voice bounced off the bleachers, and the fluorescents hanging overhead flickered unevenly.
But it’s been weeks already, and I have to . . .
I stopped dead, looking up at the lights, brushing a curl out of my face. Even one of Nathalie’s braids would lose a few strands when faced with a fight with Christophe.
He didn’t even look back. “Until you’re ready? Yes. Perhaps longer.”
“You said I was coming along! You said I was fast! I killed that thing last night—”
“You
are
fast. But before
I
trust you in a sparring match with edged weapons, you need to be fast and
precise
. Not to mention completely in control of where your blades are at all times. One lucky shot against a young
nosferat
—with
malaika
your wulfen friend stole, by the way—is not enough to convince me.” He scooped up one stick, half-turned on one booted heel, and set off for the other. “Anna never wanted to walk when she could be carried, your mother wanted to walk when she could fly, and you want to run before you can walk. It is”—another quick movement, and he had the other stick—“maddening, sometimes. First guard, Dru.”
are
fast. But before
I
trust you in a sparring match with edged weapons, you need to be fast and
precise
. Not to mention completely in control of where your blades are at all times. One lucky shot against a young
nosferat
—with
malaika
your wulfen friend stole, by the way—is not enough to convince me.” He scooped up one stick, half-turned on one booted heel, and set off for the other. “Anna never wanted to walk when she could be carried, your mother wanted to walk when she could fly, and you want to run before you can walk. It is”—another quick movement, and he had the other stick—“maddening, sometimes. First guard, Dru.”
I thought we were done.
But I grabbed both sticks and straightened, whirling, just in time to catch his strike.
But I grabbed both sticks and straightened, whirling, just in time to catch his strike.
Dirty fighting, again. He came at me like he wanted to hurt me, and I returned the favor. Maybe he had to make up for kissing me or something.
That was the thing about Christophe. I never knew which side of him I was facing in the practice room.
I managed to keep him off me for a full two minutes before I ended up sprawled on the mats. One of his sticks was right under my chin, touching delicately. If it was a
malaika
, it would cut.
malaika
, it would cut.
“Half a year,” Christophe said softly. “At least. More if you insist on playing slip-the-leash during the day; you need your rest if you expect to function well during accelerated training.” His voice rose, but only slightly. “It takes
years
to learn this thoroughly, Dru, and I will not cut corners with you, even if I
allow
you a certain limited part in seek-destroy missions to soothe your Lefevre pride. Don’t argue with me. Not about this.”
years
to learn this thoroughly, Dru, and I will not cut corners with you, even if I
allow
you a certain limited part in seek-destroy missions to soothe your Lefevre pride. Don’t argue with me. Not about this.”
So he knew. Of course he knew; he’d walked right into the pizza parlor. He just hadn’t caught us outright. Still, with the smell of wulfen—and me—all over the building, he hadn’t had to.
And
Lefevre
. My mother’s name. As if my father hadn’t existed at all. Of course, he’d just been human, right?
Lefevre
. My mother’s name. As if my father hadn’t existed at all. Of course, he’d just been human, right?
Jesus.
You’re an asshole sometimes, Christophe.
I knocked the stick away and bounced up to my feet. It wouldn’t do any good to yell at him; he’d just wipe the floor with me some more. Instead, I stalked for the exit, dropping both of my weapons with hollow sounds.
I knocked the stick away and bounced up to my feet. It wouldn’t do any good to yell at him; he’d just wipe the floor with me some more. Instead, I stalked for the exit, dropping both of my weapons with hollow sounds.
He said nothing else. He didn’t need to. My teeth tingled, my mouth burned, my eyes were full of tears. None of them escaped, they just made my vision waver.
And I still couldn’t get the taste of him off my lips.
CHAPTER EIGHT
The baths in
Schola locker rooms are weird, to say the least. The sunken tubs are full of a bubbling whitish fluid that clings to your skin and hardens like paraffin wax when the air hits it. It speeds up the healing processes like crazy, and when you wash it out in the shower, it just slides right down the drain like jelly, taking a lot of the hurt and inflammation with it. It even helps with the sandy-headed feeling you get after not enough sleep, running around with wulfen, and getting your ass handed to you by a supercilious
djamphir
.
Schola locker rooms are weird, to say the least. The sunken tubs are full of a bubbling whitish fluid that clings to your skin and hardens like paraffin wax when the air hits it. It speeds up the healing processes like crazy, and when you wash it out in the shower, it just slides right down the drain like jelly, taking a lot of the hurt and inflammation with it. It even helps with the sandy-headed feeling you get after not enough sleep, running around with wulfen, and getting your ass handed to you by a supercilious
djamphir
.
When it gets in your hair, though, it takes a while to rinse out even in the showers, where the water pressure can strip your skin off.
Okay, I’ll admit it. I outright love the Schola showers. I’ve cleaned up in too many cheap-ass hotel rooms where you barely get a dribble of tepid rust-stained fluid that might’ve been water once.
Another good thing here: the hot water never runs out. I was in there long enough to turn into a prune before I got the waxy stuff out of my curls. When I shut the water off, the whole locker room echoed. On the boys’ side of any Schola gym, there’s always plenty of tubs and showers, and I’d guess it’s probably always full of noise after classes.
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