Defective (The Institute Series Book 3) (6 page)

“Well in that case: I’m doing well, I haven’t used my abilities in any capacity, I’m working, paying taxes, and being an all-round stand-up citizen.”

“Works for me. But really – how are you doing?” he asks seriously.

“I’m doing
fine
.”

“Yeah, it’s my experience that when a woman says she’s
fine
, she’s not
fine.
Not to mention I can read you.”
Stupid empathy ability.
“Has it got to do with your mum?” he asks quietly.

“Not you, too? Why does everyone ask me that? No, I haven’t spoken to her, and no I don’t intend to anytime soon.”

“Okay, okay,” he says holding up his hands in surrender. “I’m just trying to get to the bottom of the black cloud of emotion that you’re giving me. I want to know why you’re upset.”

Taking a deep breath, I prepare myself to let it all out. “There’s a lot of things making me feel this way. Right now my main reason is lack of sleep. I’ve been doing night shifts the last three nights, I’m running on about two hours’ sleep that I took in the car on the way here. I’m tired, I’m overworked, and when I’m home, I have to put on the confident girlfriend act for Paxton’s campaign. Plus I have studying to catch up on, and to top it off, it feels like Ebb is trying to pimp me out to anyone who agrees to go out with me!”

“What?” Drew asks.

I hang my head. “I went on a date last week,” I admit.

“Oh?”

“It was a complete disaster. Ebb forced me into it. She told me she was going to meet me and had this guy turn up instead.” Which reminds me – I was so tired this morning I didn’t even remember to scold her about it. She’s lucky she’s been working at the hospital and has been able to avoid me until today.

He laughs. “Sorry, but that’s pretty funny.”

“It was horrible! Is this what I’m going to have to deal with when I’m finally ready to date? Guys who only want one thing, sticking their tongues so far down my throat they can practically taste my stomach?”

Drew screws up his face. “Ugh. There’s a visual I don’t want in my head.”

“Sorry,” I say quickly. I realise we haven’t really spoken about dating or relationships with each other. I’ve probably crossed some sort of line between us.

“No one can tell you when you’ll be ready to start dating again. You have to decide for yourself. Ignore Ebb, as hard as that may be. We all know what she’s like.”

I smile, but it’s a sad smile. “Thanks.”

“Besides, aren’t you meant to be all shacked up with Paxton? I heard he proposed,” he says, one eyebrow raised.

“Not for real though. He wants me to be his trophy wife. He wants his poll ratings to go higher. Real romantic, right?”

“I did always think it was weird – you and him, together. It just didn’t seem right. Not like you and Ch…” he stops himself before he says Chad’s name.

“You can say his name,” I reassure him. “I think I’m finally at a point where I’m not going to break down every time I talk about him.”

“Well that’s progress, right?”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

We’re interrupted by a man coming into the office. He’s probably in his fifties, dark hair that’s beginning to grey, green eyes that are wrinkled around the edges. He’s wearing overalls, so I assume he’s the janitor. “Oh sorry, I didn’t realise you had someone in here.”

“That’s okay, Dad. This is Allira,” Drew says.

“Dad?” I blurt out accidently.

“
The
Allira?” the janitor asks.

“Yes, and yes,” Drew answers both of us.

Drew’s dad wipes his hand on his overalls before extending his hand for me to shake. “I’m so glad to finally meet you,” he says warmly. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

I wish I could say the same about you,
I think as I shake his hand. I didn’t even realise Drew was in touch with his parents. They sent him to live here at the Institute when he was fifteen, and he has never talked much about them before.

Ebb comes through the door without even bothering to knock. Then again, I did the same thing when I came in, and so did Drew’s dad, so I guess I can’t judge her.

“Ready to go?” she asks me.

“Sure,” I say getting up from my chair. “It was nice to meet you,” I say to Drew’s dad. He nods in return.

“Already? It feels like you just got here,” Drew complains. “Can’t you hang out for a while? Come look at all the things I’m trying to accomplish here? So much has changed since you were last here for a proper visit. It seems these days you’re in and out within five minutes.”

“I want to stay,” I lie. “But Ebb’s my ride home.”

Drew gets up, coming around his desk to hug me again. “Please come back and see me when you can. I don’t want it to be another month before we talk, okay?”

“Okay,” I say, knowing full well that’s not going to happen. “And if you ever have time off, come to the city – we’ll catch up.”

“Okay,” he replies in the same empty gesture tone that I just used. “Nice to see you, too, Ebb,” he says over my shoulder.

Ebb bows exaggeratedly, “The honour is all mine, Director, sir.”

I can’t help but laugh.

“Get out of here, you two,” he says, trying to be serious but not pulling it off.

Ebb and I start walking back down the hallway towards the entrance of the building, when I reach over and punch her hard in the arm.

“Ow! What the hell was that for?” she exclaims.

“Belated punishment for setting me up with that Dex guy.”

“Oh. I was hoping you’d forgotten about that,” she says sheepishly. “I thought because you hadn’t mentioned it, that maybe—”

“Maybe I’d forgotten you ambushed me into a horrible date that I didn’t want to go on in the first place?”

“I was hoping anyway. I saw him at the hospital a few nights ago, so I figured it didn’t end well when he saw me and ran the other way as fast as he could.”

“You have to promise me you won’t do that again.”

“I don’t know if I can do that,” she says. “How else will I get you to start dating again?”

I sigh in frustration. “We’ve already been over this. I don’t want to date.”

She sighs in louder frustration. “Fine.” She looks around as we reach the parking lot, I don’t know what she’s looking for, but she tosses me the keys to her car. “You take the car. Come to my place and drop it off, and then I’ll take you home.”

“You’re not coming with me?”

“Nope.” And with that, she teleports out of the parking lot, leaving me to a two-hour car ride by myself. I don’t know if I’m annoyed or grateful.

I’m annoyed that she’s using her ability – especially in the parking lot of the place that’s meant to police those sorts of violations. I guess she assumes being friends with Drew will be beneficial if she ever got caught.

Driving back to the city with nothing to distract me from my thoughts, I realise that’s a dangerous thing. Drew was right. There’s a black cloud of emotions swirling around me, and I want it to stop. I want to be normal like everybody else. But where am I meant to start?

Chapter Six

Jayce seems to be a natural at medical stuff, just like Ebb. He’s technically only an administrative volunteer as he has no medical training, but he does have previous first aid training, so he’s been able to assist with easy tasks. The few times I’ve had him help me, it seems he knows more than me.

I know I’ve only been doing this a few months, but I’m really beginning to wonder why I struggle with it so much. It’s not that I think I’m too dumb, it just doesn’t come easily. I have to force it.

Jayce hasn’t offered up too much info about himself apart from the fact he goes to university, is studying psychology, and lives with his sister. He’ll be starting shifts on his own in a few short weeks, so we’ve managed to stick to mostly medical talk, which is fine by me. The more I learn about him, the more I reluctantly like him.

He’s out back dealing with the laundry when I hear the door swing open and look up from the reception desk to find Ebbodine strolling in to take over for the day shift. We haven’t spoken since she ditched me at the Institute on Monday. I returned her car, put her keys in her mail slot, and walked home. I was fearful that if she saw me, I’d have to endure yet another conversation about dating, or my mum, or anything else she likes to lecture me on.

“Hey,” she says in a calm, almost sympathetic tone.

“Hey.” My tone is curt compared to hers.

“I’m sorry about what I did.”

“Ambushing me into a horrible date, or ditching me with your car?”

She looks down at her feet. “Both?” She eventually meets my stern eyes and then rolls hers. “Fine. I promise I will never set you up on a date again,” she pauses, “until you want me to.”

“No! No ‘want to’, I don’t want to date anyone. Why can’t you understand that? Stop pushing me into something I’m not ready for.” Why is this such a preposterous request to her?

“Laundry’s done,” Jayce’s voice comes from behind us. We turn to look at him, and I wonder how much he heard. He’s staring at me, his arms crossed, his expression neutral.

The urge to explain myself brings words to the tip of my tongue, but I can’t get them out. Luckily, Ebb breaks the silence.

“Hi,” she says with a flirtatious smile. “I’m Ebbodine. We met the other day,” she says reaching forward and shaking his hand.

“Hey,” he replies, taking her hand in his before crossing his arms again.

“So how are you settling in?”

He shrugs. “Fine, I guess.”

“If Allira hasn’t been all that welcoming, I understand. She can be a bit crabby at times.” She smiles like she’s joking, but I know she’s telling the truth. Even I’ll admit that I’m crabby a lot of the time. I don’t mean to be – it just comes out of me.

He looks back at me and smiles. “She’s actually been pretty great.”

My heart does an involuntary jump.

Ebb looks at me with narrowed eyes, then back at Jayce with a smile. “Well how about I take you out for a proper welcome? Say, dinner and drinks? Tonight?” she asks before side glancing at me. I stiffen in my seat reflexively, but I hope she doesn’t notice. Did she really just ask him out? And so casually as well. I could never pull something like that off.

Jayce awkwardly glances at me for a moment, before glancing back at Ebb. “I actually have plans with my brother tonight.”

“Bring him along. Allira can come with us, too. The clinic is closed tomorrow so we’ll all have the day off to… recover.”

Did she actually just wink? Ugh. The last thing I want to do is go to dinner and watch Ebb fawning all over Jayce.

She turns to me. “You’re up for that, right?”

“Aunt Kenna said something about me working tonight. Relief nurse can’t make it or something.” Ebb just stares at me, knowing that I’m lying. “Ebb,” I say in a warning voice that says she’s crossing that line again.

She grunts, her shoulder’s slumping forward as she grabs my arm and drags me out into the treatment room.

“You have to,” she states as soon as we’re out of ear shot of Jayce.

“No, I don’t,” I counter. “You literally just promised no more dates, and now you want me to go on a double date? Are you freaking kidding me right now?”

“It’s not a double date. It’s just friends hanging out. It’s a chance to get to know the new guy, and a chance for you to have normal twenty-year-old experiences as opposed to thirty-year-old political ones.”

“I don’t want to be ditched with Jayce’s brother while you two… you know.”

She rolls her eyes, offended that I’d think she’d do something like that – even though she’s done similar plenty of times. “I promise. Just dinner and drinks, and I’ll even come home with you and stay the night – girls’ night. Paxton’s still away, yeah?”

“Yeah, but Nuka and her nanny are home, so we’ll have to be quiet.”

“Deal. So you’ll come?” she asks, hopefulness filling her eyes.

“Ugh, I guess.”

She briefly hugs me before rushing back out to Jayce to work out the details.
Why did I just say yes?

***

I told Ebb I’ll meet her, but she arrives on my doorstep anyway, pursing her lips as she eyes me up and down. I’m wearing jeans and a hooded jacket, my hair pulled back in a plain pony tail.

“I knew you were going to need my help,” she says entering the apartment. She’s carrying six or seven coat hangers full of clothes, and she makes her way into my room, throwing them on the bed. “Okay. Here are your options.”

“You didn’t say anything about dressing up.”

“This isn’t dressing up, it’s looking nice. There’s a difference.”

“I don’t look nice?” I ask, only mildly offended.

“No. Are you even wearing makeup?”

“Yes, but I wanted it to be subtle, not like I was going to a benefit or political appearance.”

“Go finish your face, I’ll pick your outfit.”

I don’t bother arguing – it’s Ebb, there’s no point – and after I’ve done what I’m told, I come back out of the bathroom to find a short black dress with tiny floral print all over it.

“No.” I flat out refuse. “It’s too short, and it doesn’t cover my arm.”

Ebb slumps her head to the side. “You can pick leggings or your elbow length denim jacket to go with it.”

“Both,” I say defiantly.

“No. You have to pick only one.”

“Fine. Jacket.”

As I walk past her, she quickly turns and pulls my hair tie out, letting my hair fall past my shoulders.

“Perfect,” she says.

After getting dressed, we start walking down the street towards some restaurant I’ve never been to, me complaining about the shortness of my dress the whole way. I should’ve fought harder to get the leggings.

“My dress is even shorter so you can’t complain!” Ebb says. She’s right, too. Where my dress is flowing and loose fitting – but short – hers is figure hugging, and a lot shorter than mine. But she’s always showing off her skin. She has no reservations of showing off her mark, her legs, her boobs. I do.

We arrive at the restaurant to find the guys already seated in a booth up against the window. Jayce stands when he sees us and moves over to the other side so he’s sitting with his brother. I’m grateful for the move. I didn’t want to be stuck next to Jayce’s brother.

“Hi,” Ebb sing-songs as she sits, sliding into the booth across from the brother. I’m surprised by her move considering she’s here to hit on Jayce.

“Hey,” I say casually, sitting down, looking at Jayce.

He smiles and nods hello to me. “This is Jamie,” he says gesturing to his brother. “This is Ebb, and Allira.”

Jamie reaches across the table and shakes my hand, then Ebb’s. I notice he has the same intense blue eyes as Jayce, but his hair is a darker blond, almost light brown, and he’s a lot shorter than Jayce, but looks older by a couple of years.

“So where’s Paxton tonight?” Jayce asks me. The question throws me a bit. I don’t know why he’s asking it. He hasn’t brought Paxton up since he first found out about him. I’m worried he’s trying to catch me out in my lie after overhearing Ebb and me earlier this morning.

“He’s out campaigning. Has been for the last few days,” I reply.

“Who’s Paxton?” Jamie asks.

“Uh…” I stutter. How in the world am I going to answer this with Ebb here?

“Allira’s boyfriend,” Jayce responds, a slight smile on his lips.

Ebb practically chokes on the water she started sipping. “Boyfriend?” she exclaims. I glare at her, begging her not to expose me. Although by the look on Jayce’s face, he already knows and Ebb’s just confirmed his suspicions.

“Campaigning? You mean Paxton James is your boyfriend?” Jamie asks.

“Uh. Let’s not talk politics tonight,” I say.

“So, what are we drinking?” Jayce changes the subject, letting the issue slide.

“Something strong,” I mumble, making the table laugh.

A few rounds and some food later, I actually find that I’m enjoying myself. The conversation is flowing as easily as the drinks. I thought it was going to feel weird, like Jamie and I were the third and fourth wheels on a date, but surprisingly enough, we’ve all interacted equally.

“So Jayce was telling me about this clinic you all work at,” Jamie says. “I’ll have to come by sometime and have a look.”

“You really should do that,” Ebb says in a flirtatious tone.

Taking a purposeful sideways glance at Jayce to see his reaction, he isn’t paying attention to Ebb and Jamie at all. He’s looking at me, making me blush. I make a point to blame the alcohol for my warm cheeks.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” I say, excusing myself from the table. I lost count of the amount of drinks I’ve had. I’m not drunk, but I certainly need to pee.

“I’ll come with you!” Ebbodine exclaims a little louder than necessary. I can’t say the same for her about not being drunk. She’s had about twice as many as me.

She follows me into the bathroom and immediately says the words I’ve been dreading to hear. “I know I promised I wouldn’t do this… but…”

“No,” I say before she can finish. “You cannot leave me alone with a complete stranger.”

“Jayce isn’t a stranger,” she says, surprising me.

“Wait… what?”

“I want some alone time with Jamie,” she whispers.

“Really?” I feel my face light up even though I tell it not to.

“Yeah. Is that okay?”

“That’s fine by me. I can walk home by myself – it’s only a couple of blocks.”
Really fine by me.
I try to hide my smile.

We get back to the table to find Jayce standing. “Hey, thanks for the evening, ladies, but I should be getting home. I actually have classes tomorrow.”

“Oh, would you be able to walk Allira home? She’s suddenly not feeling so well, and I worry about her walking by herself.” Ebb’s concerned manner is convincing, even though I know she’s faking it. She was all too happy to have me walk home by myself two minutes ago.

He smiles. “Yeah, no problem.”

“Call me tomorrow,” I tell her.

As I go to walk away, Jayce briefly puts his hand on the small of my back, sending shivers up and down my spine.

“So not feeling well?” he asks me as we start walking down the street.

“Classes tomorrow?” I retort.

“You were told to get lost, too?”

“Yup. I’m pretty sure your brother just stole your date,” I say with a laugh.

“How do you know it wasn’t the other way around?” he asks with a wry smile. “I wouldn’t have come if I thought it was a date with Ebb.”

Silence fills the air, the type of silence that can get awkward really quick if you don’t change the subject or make a joke. Luckily, he continues talking, because I have no idea how to respond to that.

“Can I ask you something? And keep in mind it’s completely okay if you don’t want to answer. I just don’t want to be lied to.”

“I think I know what’s coming.” I say with a sigh. “You want to know about Paxton.”

He nods.

“I didn’t technically lie.”

“Is he your boyfriend or not?” he asks flat out.

“Not. But it’s not as easy as that. Paxton and I have been through so much together. He has a six-year-old daughter – he doesn’t have time to go out and meet eligible women between spending time with Nuka and campaigning, and I… well I don’t date – like ever – so he offered me a room in his apartment on the condition I’d be his partner to these benefits and campaign appearances. So while we aren’t technically together, the media thinks we are, and he doesn’t want me dating because if they were to find out, it’d show ‘instability’ or something. I don’t understand what that means, but basically I can’t date until the election is over, and even then, I probably won’t want to. So when you saw that article and assumed what everyone else assumes, I ran with it because it would’ve saved me from having to have this conversation.”

He just nods his head, a small smile playing on his lips. “You could’ve just told me that from the beginning.”