Deep Sea (23 page)

Nothing will ever be like it used to be. For a long time after she arrived in Sweden, she imagined they would soon be a family again. Mamma, Papa, Nellie, and Stephie. Now she knows that is never going to happen. Mamma is dead. Papa is gone,
abgereist
. And she is no longer a little girl.

Sixteen years old. Nearly grown up.

Her childhood is over.

She’s already been in high school for a whole month. It’s difficult, and she has to work hard, but she likes it. The girls are more serious than most of her classmates at grammar school were. They talk about current affairs and about what they want to be—teachers, pharmacists, or doctors, like Stephie. One of the girls even wants to be an engineer.

Every morning, Stephie and May take the tram to school. They bump into each other now and then in the halls, in the schoolyard, and in the lunchroom. After school they usually meet and take the tram back to Sandarna together.

A high wave tosses a cloud of foam up around her feet. Every seventh wave is an especially strong one, Stephie has heard. Why every seventh? She doesn’t know.

Along another shore, farther south, the Allied troops are landing in France. A voice on the radio said, “This is not the beginning of the end, but it may be the end of the beginning.”
How long is it going to take?

Stephie sits down, pulling her knees to her chest and hugging them. She rests her chin on her hands. She becomes one with the rhythm of the waves, which helps her breathe more calmly.

At the far end of the beach, she sees a little figure approaching. After some time, Stephie recognizes Nellie. She’s taken off her shoes and stockings and is wading
barefoot in the shallow water, although it is already cold.

Stephie gets up and waves. “Nellie!” she shouts.

The wind carries her voice, and Nellie hears, looks up at the cliff, and waves back.

Stephie sits down again, waiting for Nellie to come along the beach. A stretch of shore is always longer than it appears. There are so many little coves to be walked around, rocks to be climbed over.

Shoes and socks in hand, Nellie heads up to where Stephie is sitting and drops down next to her. Silently, they look west, at the horizon, where the sea gleams bright silver. Closer to land, it still reflects the lead gray of the cloudy sky.

“We never made it to America,” Nellie says after some time.

“No.”

“You used to tell me about America. About big cities with tall buildings and streets crowded with cars. Do you remember?”

“Yes, I do.”

“You comforted me,” says Nellie. “When I was little.”

Stephie looks at Nellie. Her face is grave and open.

“I’ve been angry with you,” Nellie goes on. “I thought you were keeping me from feeling at home here. I thought you were always nagging, and giving me a guilty conscience.”

“I had a guilty conscience myself, for failing to take
good enough care of you,” Stephie says. “I felt like I was letting Mamma and Papa down.”

They sit quietly, looking out over the endless sea. Stephie takes Nellie’s hand, and Nellie doesn’t pull away.

“We’ll have to look after each other now,” says Nellie.

“Yes,” says Stephie. “We will.”

ANNIKA THOR was born and raised in a Jewish family in Göteborg, Sweden. She has been a librarian, has written for both film and theater, and is the author of many books for children, young adults, and adults. She lives in Stockholm.

A Faraway Island, The Lily Pond
, and
Deep Sea
are the first three novels in a quartet featuring the Steiner sisters, which has been translated into numerous languages and has garnered awards worldwide. Swedish television also adapted the books into a hugely popular eight-part series.
A Faraway Island
received the Mildred L. Batchelder Award for an outstanding children’s book originally published in a foreign language, and
The Lily Pond
received the Mildred L. Batchelder Honor Award.