Deep Focus (13 page)

She held their hands together at their sides and demonstrated how to move her hips. “My foot comes forward, yours goes back. Like this.”

She thought he was going to resist and crack another joke. But he concentrated and managed to do an admirable job of moving with her. “See, you’ve got it.”

“You make it easy,” Hunter said, his voice husky.

As the music pulsed around them, white fairy lights lit up the night sky and the other couples shimmied, Melanie wondered at how easily she and Hunter had found a rhythm. Together.

12

H
UNTER
WAS
DAMN
certain he wouldn’t have made a jackass out of himself dancing in public for anyone but Melanie. She seemed to have a way of looking up at him with those limpid eyes and making him agree to just about anything. But he was also glad she had offered him an option between truth and dare. He would rather lob off his own nuts than admit that what he was afraid of was that he was actually falling for her.

As in, he wasn’t sure that he could let her disappear entirely from his life once they got back home.

That would be humiliating to admit. One, because it was a stupid thing to be afraid of. He hardly knew her. Two, because the last thing Melanie needed was a guy making her life difficult by placing demands on her right after she got out of a bum relationship. It would be selfish of him to tell her that he wanted to see her again next week, post-Cancún.

Besides, he didn’t even know what he meant by that exactly. Did he want to date her? Hang out with her? Just have sex with her? He wasn’t sure. He just knew the thought of never seeing her again tied his gut up in knots.

He’d been serious about not wanting a relationship for a while, if ever. He couldn’t do it again—be there for a woman, riding through all her ups and downs while keeping his own feelings to himself, only to have her walk away when she was emotionally satisfied. Over and over again he found himself doing with women what he had done with his mother. He picked them up when they were down, helped them heal, listened to them, gave encouragement. Only to be abandoned once they were on their feet.

In a sense, his mom had done that, too. Every new boyfriend had sucked the majority of her attention; then when things went sour, she was all about her “little man.” Hunter had learned to take advantage of those periods in between boyfriends and hoard as much of her affection as possible, squirreling it away, even if that meant most of their time together was spent reassuring her that the ex was a douchebag and that she was beautiful.

He couldn’t do that here with Melanie. It was the same damn situation. She was torn up and angry over Ian and did not in any way need him complicating her life. Nor did he need to be left in the dust yet again.

Keep his mouth shut. End of story.

So instead, here he was attempting to dance, and he had to admit that aside from feeling like a
Dancing with the Stars
contestant, and failing, there was something to be said for holding Melanie about the waist and having her smiling and moving in a way that could only be called seductive.

“Let go,” she urged him.

He dropped his hands off her waist, confused. “Did I step on you?”

“No. I mean, feel the music.”

It was safe to say he had no clue how to do that. “That sounds way too new age for me, Melly, I’m sorry.”

“It’s like sex,” she told him.

That was promising. He waited patiently for her to continue. “Yes?”

“You have to let go like you’ve been telling me to let go in bed. Let the music sweep you away in pleasure. No thinking. Just feel it.”

Hunter had thought Melanie was sexy from the minute he’d met her. But this look she was giving him now was perhaps the hottest expression he’d seen cross her face yet. Because this wasn’t her hesitating, or her being coaxed to enjoyment. It was total role reversal, and she was in charge, in command, confident. In her dance moves and otherwise.

“I’m feeling a lot of things,” he murmured.

“Oh, yeah? Tell me what those are.”

“For starters, once I’m done with this dance, it’s my turn to offer you truth or dare.”

Her eyebrows shot up. But she just shrugged. “Sure.”

Hunter spun her around, catching her off guard. She gave a breathless laugh that died off when he pulled her hard against his chest at the end of the spin. Every man in the square had checked Melanie out at some point or another. Hunter was aware that he was pretty damn lucky that she was with him. He may have slid into this spot by default because Ian Bainbridge was a moron. Didn’t mean he was going to enjoy it any less.

“But you’re not finished dancing yet,” she told him, her fingers gripping the front of his shirt.

“No? Why not?”

“Because you haven’t let go yet.”

“Have you let go in bed?”

He thought she had, but maybe not as far as it was possible to take it. He was up for seeing just how far he could push her.

“Ninety percent,” she said.

He gave her credit for honesty. “I’ve let go about twenty percent with this dancing. But if you let me take you back to the room, I promise to dance all you want on the veranda.”

“It’s not the same,” she said.

“It will be better.” Because then dancing could lead to the horizontal shuffle, and he was all about that while he had the opportunity.

But then someone dancing next to them bumped into their arms, and something about the angle made Hunter’s arm explode with pain. It dissipated quickly into a dull ache, but he dropped his hold on Melanie and grimaced.

He expected her to express concern. To mother him the way she had at the zip line place. But she didn’t. She just stayed exactly where she was, swaying with him, as though she trusted him to tell her if it was beyond what he could handle. It was that simple gesture, that understanding of what he needed and didn’t need, that cracked his reserve. Melanie had gotten under his skin, and maybe wiggled a bit into his heart, he wasn’t sure. But he was certain that she deserved him giving her whatever she wanted. That didn’t mean a relationship. It just meant a great vacation, and he’d dance like an idiot for that.

The woman wanted hip shaking. He was going to shake it, and then he was going to drop her in a dip so low, he’d literally turn her world upside down.

In fact, she was right. Who gave a shit who was watching or what they thought. He turned Melanie around with one hand and she smiled at him, her skirt flying. When she was back facing him he dropped her down.

She let out a little scream.

He stared into her eyes, getting the distinct impression she wasn’t finding this as romantic as he did. Especially when somehow, despite his grip on her, she fell onto the ground.

Oh, God. He’d screwed that up royally. “Maybe we need to work on that move.”

At least she was laughing. “That was my fault. My foot slipped.” She was struggling to get up.

Hunter held both hands out for her. “You looked beautiful doing it.”

She wasn’t buying it. “I relent. We can go back to the room.”

“Truth or dare?” he asked, giving her a swat on the ass under the pretense of brushing dirt off her as she stood.

“Hey.” She swatted at his hand. “Truth.”

He should have known that was what she would pick. Though it was fine with him. There was definitely a thing or two he was curious about. “Did you love Ian?” he asked.

Funny enough, he hadn’t intended to ask that at all. It just came out, unbidden. He mentally cursed himself. Wow, that was shitty timing.

Her amusement died out. “What? Why?”

“Just answer the question.” He’d already asked it, so he had to roll with it, even though he had a feeling it was more revealing than he intended it to be. It almost sounded as though he cared.

Which he did. He hated that Melanie had been hurt and humiliated. It would make it worse if she had truly loved Ian. Frankly, it would also make it harder to continue to have casual sex with her. That felt wrong. He wanted what they were doing to be a free and conscious choice on her part, not an ego stroke or a way to get back at her ex.

She stared up at him, her tongue sliding along her bottom lip, wetting it. Slowly, her head went back and forth. “No. I didn’t love Ian. I guess that makes me a terrible person, doesn’t it?”

His instant relief was quickly replaced by confusion. “What? Why would you say that? Of course not.”

Melanie started walking in the direction of their resort, and he took her hand in his, wanting to touch her, feel the warmth of her body near his. He felt protective of her, and it had nothing to do with being her bodyguard. Which he wasn’t. Not really.

“Because I was with him even though I didn’t love him.”

That was some kind of female logic he didn’t quite grasp. “Melly, no one starts a relationship in love. That grows as you move forward after the initial attraction. If we all threw in the towel at four weeks or something like that, we’d be in a revolving door of relationships.”

“I guess. But it seems as though I should have loved him by that point.”

Now he was really mystified. “But he’s a douchebag. Why would you love a douchebag?”

“That’s not the point.”

He’d learned that even if he didn’t know what the hell a woman’s point was, he should never admit it. Just make a noncommittal sound and move on. “Hmm. Do you want to get a taxi?”

“No, I’m fine walking. As long as you think it’s safe.”

“I’m sure it’s safe. We’re on a main drag, and we’re in a tourist area.”

“Okay. So truth or dare?”

Hold up. “Wait, we’re doing a second round?”

“Of course. You never do it just once. What’s the fun in that?”

“Fair enough.” He was feeling ballsy. “Truth.”

She looked surprised. “Did you love your girlfriend?”

Yikes. His own question turned back on him. “I think that’s breaking the rules. You asked me the same question I asked you.”

“No, I didn’t. I didn’t ask you if you loved Ian.” She gave him a smirk.

“Hey, now. Getting a little sassy, aren’t you?” But he liked it. He liked that she was feeling comfortable and confident with him.

“Just answer the question. Or I’ll be forced to give you dare—and that will have you swimming naked with the dolphins tonight at midnight.”

Yep. Sassy. “Playing hardball now, huh? Fine. I will answer the question. No, I didn’t love Danielle. I cared about her. I enjoyed her company, and I respected her as a person.”

That sounded...professional. But it was the truth. He didn’t think it was particularly unusual to be with someone under those circumstances. They had never lied to each other and made promises. There had been mutual admiration and companionship. Not bad things to base a romance on.

Romance.
What an odd word. He wasn’t sure he even understood what it meant.

“But you wanted to be with her.”

“Yes. Because I was willing to ignore warning signs. When I met her, she was out of a bad relationship, and she needed to talk about it a lot. So things started out with her sharing feelings, not asking about me, and then it frustrated her that I didn’t share as much as she wanted.”

“What I don’t understand is why she would just suddenly dump you when you got home. Why wait like that?”

“Maybe she liked the idea of having someone, of being able to say she had a boyfriend who was deployed, but the reality didn’t live up to whatever she’d been expecting when I was gone.” Did it matter? He wasn’t sure it did. “Whatever the hell happened, I don’t totally understand it. What I do understand is I’m not in a position to have a relationship right now.”

“Clearly neither am I,” she murmured. “I’m like Danielle, aren’t I? On the rebound, letting you comfort me.”

It was pretty obvious to both of them that was exactly what was going on. It wasn’t a bad thing. It just wasn’t anything to base a future on beyond Cancún, even if either of them thought they might want that. Which he wasn’t sure they did.

“There’s nothing wrong with that, Melly. Don’t feel guilty. We’re enjoying each other. It’s not one-sided.” He was enjoying her, no doubt about it. “For the record, when you were taking me into your mouth, I did not feel as though I was comforting you.”

“Good. That was about you.” She stared up at him with deep, seductive eyes. “Sad thing is, I couldn’t stay away from you right now if I tried.”

“So don’t.”

They were approaching the resort, and it was lit up, spotlights shining on the glossy white building. There was music coming faintly from somewhere, and the sound of the ocean waves crashing onto the beach directly behind the building. It seemed odd to Hunter that the sound of the ocean could supersede all the volume produced by the humans inside the building. But nature had a way of dominating, despite man’s best intentions otherwise.

As Hunter stood there, pausing in front of the hotel, he decided he wanted to skirt the building entirely and take Melanie for a walk on the beach.

Romance was like the ocean. It superseded all the noise created by life.

He wanted to give Melanie romance.

She deserved it.

Hell, maybe he needed to give it as much as she needed to receive it. Hadn’t they both been in relationships based on logic and proximity and basic compatibility instead of passion and love? He didn’t want to give her advice or a shoulder to cry on. He wanted to give both of them total escape: from the snow, from the past, from loneliness.

Hunter leaned over and kissed Melanie, taking her mouth in a rough, dominating kiss because he needed to taste her, feel her lips beneath his. “Was that comforting?”

“Not particularly.” Her voice was a low whisper. “More like arousing.”

“Good.” He stroked her cheek with his thumb. “I don’t want you to feel as though I’m taking advantage of your breakup.”

“I don’t,” she protested. “This is mutual.”

“Then, don’t say this is about me comforting you. It’s about forgetting all the shit that drags us down at home. It’s about here. Now. You, me, warm water and soft sand. Our skin touching. That’s all.” And that was everything.

“I was wrong,” she said. “You’re not like James Bond at all. You’re much more eloquent.”

That was flattering enough that it made him uncomfortable. So instead of acknowledging it, he said, “Let’s go down here first,” tugging her in the direction of the path that led to the beach.

“Are you trying to get out of the veranda dance you promised?” she asked, looking at him suspiciously, but letting him lead her.

Well, yes, but that had no bearing on his decision. “No, of course not. I just thought it would feel good to dip our toes in the ocean.”

She gave a sigh of pleasure. “It would, wouldn’t it? I can’t believe we haven’t even lain on the beach yet.”