Decoding Love (30 page)
Authors: Andrew Trees
For testicle size, penis size, and body dimorphism, see Jared Diamond’s
The Third Chimpanzee: The evolution and future of the human animal
(New York: Harper Collins, 1992). For a discussion of the advantages and disadvantages of monogamy and polygamy, see Robert Wright’s
The Moral Animal: Why we are the way we are: The new science of evolutionary psychology
(New York: Vintage Books, 1995).
The Third Chimpanzee: The evolution and future of the human animal
(New York: Harper Collins, 1992). For a discussion of the advantages and disadvantages of monogamy and polygamy, see Robert Wright’s
The Moral Animal: Why we are the way we are: The new science of evolutionary psychology
(New York: Vintage Books, 1995).
For the indefatigable consumers out there, Barry Schwartz’s
The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less
(New York: Harper Collins, 2004) is a remarkable exploration of the difficulties that too much choice creates for us. The happiness studies I mentioned for chapter 1 also provide a great deal of insight into our ability to make ourselves miserable. For the difficulty of too many jams, see S. Iyengar and M. Lepper, “When Choice is Demotivating: Can one desire too much of a good thing?”
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
79:6 (December, 2000): 995-1006. For the study on doctors’ difficulties when faced with multiple treatments, see D. A. Redelmeier and E. Shafir, “Medical decision making in situations that offer multiple alternatives,”
Journal of the American Medical Association
273:4 (January, 1995): 302-305. For the indecisive photography students, see D. T. Gilbert and J. E. J. Ebert, “Decisions and Revisions: The affective forecasting of changeable outcomes,”
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
82:4 (April 2002): 503-514. For a study on how people prefer more relative income rather than absolute income compared to their neighbors, see S. Solnick and D. Hemenway, “Is more always better?: A survey of positional concerns,”
Journal of Economic Behavior and Organisation
37 (1998): 373-383. For a discussion of the uses of the Madonna-whore dichotomy, see Symons’s
The Evolution of Human Sexuality
(New York: Oxford University Press, 1981). For a full breakdown of sex ratios and their implications for society, see M. Guttentag and P. Secord,
Too Many Women?: The sex ratio question
(Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications, 1983). For a full account of health statistics associated with marriage, see L. Waite and M. Gallagher,
The Case for Marriage: Why married people are happier, healthier, and better off financially
(New York: Doubleday, 2000).
The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less
(New York: Harper Collins, 2004) is a remarkable exploration of the difficulties that too much choice creates for us. The happiness studies I mentioned for chapter 1 also provide a great deal of insight into our ability to make ourselves miserable. For the difficulty of too many jams, see S. Iyengar and M. Lepper, “When Choice is Demotivating: Can one desire too much of a good thing?”
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
79:6 (December, 2000): 995-1006. For the study on doctors’ difficulties when faced with multiple treatments, see D. A. Redelmeier and E. Shafir, “Medical decision making in situations that offer multiple alternatives,”
Journal of the American Medical Association
273:4 (January, 1995): 302-305. For the indecisive photography students, see D. T. Gilbert and J. E. J. Ebert, “Decisions and Revisions: The affective forecasting of changeable outcomes,”
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
82:4 (April 2002): 503-514. For a study on how people prefer more relative income rather than absolute income compared to their neighbors, see S. Solnick and D. Hemenway, “Is more always better?: A survey of positional concerns,”
Journal of Economic Behavior and Organisation
37 (1998): 373-383. For a discussion of the uses of the Madonna-whore dichotomy, see Symons’s
The Evolution of Human Sexuality
(New York: Oxford University Press, 1981). For a full breakdown of sex ratios and their implications for society, see M. Guttentag and P. Secord,
Too Many Women?: The sex ratio question
(Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications, 1983). For a full account of health statistics associated with marriage, see L. Waite and M. Gallagher,
The Case for Marriage: Why married people are happier, healthier, and better off financially
(New York: Doubleday, 2000).
For game theorists and economists, I’m afraid that most of this material is from scholarly sources that have not made it out into the world in a more accessible book form. Perhaps some enterprising readers will be inspired to do it for themselves and make my book obsolete. For the study of what men and women look for, based on lonely hearts’ ads, see D. Waynforth and R. Dunbar, “Conditional mate choice strategies in humans: Evidence from ‘Lonely Hearts’ advertisements,”
Behaviour
132 (1995): 755-779. For one of the studies on what qualities people pay up for, see N. Li, et al., “The necessities and luxuries of mate preference: Testing the trade-offs,
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
82:6 (June, 2002): 947-955. For how much men must earn to overcome a height disadvantage and other economic figures for dating, see G. Hitsch, A. Hortacsu, and D. Ariely, “What makes you click: An empirical analysis of online dating,” available at
www.aeaweb.org/annual_mtg_papers
. For an excellent discussion of the benefits and drawbacks of various physical traits, see Steven Landsburg,
More Sex Is Safer Sex: The unconventional wisdom of economics
(New York: Free Press, 2007). For the study showing that women shy away from choosing both the most attractive and the most financially successful men, see S. Chu, et al., “Too good to be ‘true’?: The handicap of high-socioeconomic status in attractive males,”
Personality and Individual Differences
42:7 (May, 2007): 1291-1300. For a full exploration of tit for tat, see Robert Axelrod,
The Evolution of Cooperation
(New York: Basic Books, 1984). For the dowry game, see Peter F. Todd and Geoffrey F. Miller, “From Pride and Prejudice to Persuasion: Satisficing in Mate Search,” in
Simple Heuristics That Makes Us Smart
(New York: Oxford University Press, 1999). For the dollar auction, see Martin Shubik, “The Dollar Auction Game: A paradox in noncooperative behavior and escalation,”
Journal of Conflict Resolution
15:1 (March, 1971): 109-114. For Laszlo Mero’s discussion of dollar auctions, see his book
Moral Calculations: Game theory, logic and human frailty
(New York: Springer, 1998).
Behaviour
132 (1995): 755-779. For one of the studies on what qualities people pay up for, see N. Li, et al., “The necessities and luxuries of mate preference: Testing the trade-offs,
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
82:6 (June, 2002): 947-955. For how much men must earn to overcome a height disadvantage and other economic figures for dating, see G. Hitsch, A. Hortacsu, and D. Ariely, “What makes you click: An empirical analysis of online dating,” available at
www.aeaweb.org/annual_mtg_papers
. For an excellent discussion of the benefits and drawbacks of various physical traits, see Steven Landsburg,
More Sex Is Safer Sex: The unconventional wisdom of economics
(New York: Free Press, 2007). For the study showing that women shy away from choosing both the most attractive and the most financially successful men, see S. Chu, et al., “Too good to be ‘true’?: The handicap of high-socioeconomic status in attractive males,”
Personality and Individual Differences
42:7 (May, 2007): 1291-1300. For a full exploration of tit for tat, see Robert Axelrod,
The Evolution of Cooperation
(New York: Basic Books, 1984). For the dowry game, see Peter F. Todd and Geoffrey F. Miller, “From Pride and Prejudice to Persuasion: Satisficing in Mate Search,” in
Simple Heuristics That Makes Us Smart
(New York: Oxford University Press, 1999). For the dollar auction, see Martin Shubik, “The Dollar Auction Game: A paradox in noncooperative behavior and escalation,”
Journal of Conflict Resolution
15:1 (March, 1971): 109-114. For Laszlo Mero’s discussion of dollar auctions, see his book
Moral Calculations: Game theory, logic and human frailty
(New York: Springer, 1998).
For those on the prowl, I recommend Timothy Perper’s
Sex Signals: The Biology of Love
(Philadelphia: Isi Press, 1986) and David Givens’s
Love Signals: A Practical Field Guide to the Body Language of Courtship
(New York: St. Martin’s Press, 2004). For the lap dance study, see G. Miller, J. M. Tybur, and B. D. Jordan, “Ovulatory cycle effects on tip earnings by lap dancers: Economic evidence for human estrus?”
Evolution and Human Behavior
28:6 (November, 2007): 375-381. For the power of eye contact, see D. Walsh and J. Hewitt, “Giving men the come-on: The effect of eye contact and smiling in a bar environment,”
Perceptual and Motor Skills
(December, 1985): 873-874. For a female’s fifty-two nonverbal signals for attracting a man’s attention, see Monica Moore, “Nonverbal courtship patterns in women: Context and consequences,”
Ethology and Sociobiology
6:4 (1985): 237-247. For the different approaches to seduction, based on essays by men and women, see Perper,
Sex Signals.
For the affective shift that occurs after sex, see D. Buss and M. Haselton, “The affective shift hypothesis: The functions of emotional change following sexual intercourse,”
Personal Relationships
8:4 (December, 2001): 1357-1369. For a historical overview of the changing rankings of what men and women want in a partner, see D. Buss, et al., “A half century of mate preferences: The cultural evolution of values,”
Journal of Marriage and Family Life
63:2 (May, 2001): 491-504. For an analysis of humor’s effect on attractiveness, see S. B. Kaufman, et al., “The role of creativity and humor in mate selection” in
Mating Intelligence: Sex, relationships, and the mind’s reproductive system
, edited by Glenn Gehr and Geoffrey Miller (Philadelphia: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, 2007). For how dopamine levels in rats decrease with each sexual encounter, see D. F. Fiorino, et al., “Dynamic changes in nucleus accumbens dopamine efflux during the Coolidge effect in male rats,”
Journal of Neuroscience
17 (June, 1997): 4849-4855. For those interested in the brain in love, I recommend Helen Fisher’s
Why We Love: The nature and chemistry of romantic love
(New York: Henry Holt, 2004). For the groundbreaking study on smell, see C. Wedekind, et al., “MHC-dependent mate preferences in humans,”
Proceedings of the Royal Society of London
B, 260 (1995): 245-249. For women’s preference of creativity over wealth at peak fertility, see M. Haselton and G. Miller, “Women’s fertility across the cycle increases short-term attractiveness of creative intelligence,”
Human Nature
17:1 (March, 2006): 50-73. For one study on men’s smell preference for women nearing their peak fertility, see R. Thornhill, et al., “Major histocompatibility complex genes, symmetry, body scent attractiveness in men and women,”
Behavioral Ecology
14:5 (September, 2003): 668-678. For the lemon-scented rats, see T. J. Fillion and E. M. Blass, “Infantile experience with suckling odors determines adult sexual behavior in male rats,”
Science
231 (1986): 729-731. For a possible genetic cause to promiscuity, see Edmund Rolls,
The Brain and Emotion
(New York: Oxford University Press, 2000). For a study on prairie voles and vasopressin, see C. Sue Carter, et al., “Physiological substrates of mammalian monogamy: The prairie vole model,”
Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews
19:2 (1995): 303-314.
Sex Signals: The Biology of Love
(Philadelphia: Isi Press, 1986) and David Givens’s
Love Signals: A Practical Field Guide to the Body Language of Courtship
(New York: St. Martin’s Press, 2004). For the lap dance study, see G. Miller, J. M. Tybur, and B. D. Jordan, “Ovulatory cycle effects on tip earnings by lap dancers: Economic evidence for human estrus?”
Evolution and Human Behavior
28:6 (November, 2007): 375-381. For the power of eye contact, see D. Walsh and J. Hewitt, “Giving men the come-on: The effect of eye contact and smiling in a bar environment,”
Perceptual and Motor Skills
(December, 1985): 873-874. For a female’s fifty-two nonverbal signals for attracting a man’s attention, see Monica Moore, “Nonverbal courtship patterns in women: Context and consequences,”
Ethology and Sociobiology
6:4 (1985): 237-247. For the different approaches to seduction, based on essays by men and women, see Perper,
Sex Signals.
For the affective shift that occurs after sex, see D. Buss and M. Haselton, “The affective shift hypothesis: The functions of emotional change following sexual intercourse,”
Personal Relationships
8:4 (December, 2001): 1357-1369. For a historical overview of the changing rankings of what men and women want in a partner, see D. Buss, et al., “A half century of mate preferences: The cultural evolution of values,”
Journal of Marriage and Family Life
63:2 (May, 2001): 491-504. For an analysis of humor’s effect on attractiveness, see S. B. Kaufman, et al., “The role of creativity and humor in mate selection” in
Mating Intelligence: Sex, relationships, and the mind’s reproductive system
, edited by Glenn Gehr and Geoffrey Miller (Philadelphia: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, 2007). For how dopamine levels in rats decrease with each sexual encounter, see D. F. Fiorino, et al., “Dynamic changes in nucleus accumbens dopamine efflux during the Coolidge effect in male rats,”
Journal of Neuroscience
17 (June, 1997): 4849-4855. For those interested in the brain in love, I recommend Helen Fisher’s
Why We Love: The nature and chemistry of romantic love
(New York: Henry Holt, 2004). For the groundbreaking study on smell, see C. Wedekind, et al., “MHC-dependent mate preferences in humans,”
Proceedings of the Royal Society of London
B, 260 (1995): 245-249. For women’s preference of creativity over wealth at peak fertility, see M. Haselton and G. Miller, “Women’s fertility across the cycle increases short-term attractiveness of creative intelligence,”
Human Nature
17:1 (March, 2006): 50-73. For one study on men’s smell preference for women nearing their peak fertility, see R. Thornhill, et al., “Major histocompatibility complex genes, symmetry, body scent attractiveness in men and women,”
Behavioral Ecology
14:5 (September, 2003): 668-678. For the lemon-scented rats, see T. J. Fillion and E. M. Blass, “Infantile experience with suckling odors determines adult sexual behavior in male rats,”
Science
231 (1986): 729-731. For a possible genetic cause to promiscuity, see Edmund Rolls,
The Brain and Emotion
(New York: Oxford University Press, 2000). For a study on prairie voles and vasopressin, see C. Sue Carter, et al., “Physiological substrates of mammalian monogamy: The prairie vole model,”
Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews
19:2 (1995): 303-314.
For marital mavens, I am obviously a big John Gottman fan. He has written several accessible books, including Gottman, et al.,
Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage: America’s Love Lab Experts Share Their Strategies for Strengthening Your Relationship
(New York: Crown, 2006) and Gottman and Nan Silver,
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from America’s Foremost Relationship Expert
(New York: Crown, 1999). Ted Huston’s PAIR project can be found on the web at
http://www.utexas.edu/research/pair/ourresearch/index.html
. For our general ineptitude at judging marital satisfaction, see R. Ebling and R. Levenson, “Who are the marital experts?”
Journal of Marriage and Family
65:1 (February, 2003): 130- 142. For the benefits of perceiving one’s partner as better than he or she is, see S. Murray, “The quest for conviction: Motivated cognition in romantic relationships,”
Psychological Inquiry
10:1 (1999), 23-33. For the value of wearing rose-colored glasses when viewing one’s husband, see M. Hawkins, et al., “Marital sentiment override: Does it influence couples’ perceptions?”
Journal of Marriage and Family
64:1 (February, 2002): 193-201. For the tendency of partners to look more like each other over time, see R. B. Zajonc, et al., “Convergence in the physical appearance of spouses,”
Motivation and Emotion
11:4 (December, 1987): 335-346.
Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage: America’s Love Lab Experts Share Their Strategies for Strengthening Your Relationship
(New York: Crown, 2006) and Gottman and Nan Silver,
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from America’s Foremost Relationship Expert
(New York: Crown, 1999). Ted Huston’s PAIR project can be found on the web at
http://www.utexas.edu/research/pair/ourresearch/index.html
. For our general ineptitude at judging marital satisfaction, see R. Ebling and R. Levenson, “Who are the marital experts?”
Journal of Marriage and Family
65:1 (February, 2003): 130- 142. For the benefits of perceiving one’s partner as better than he or she is, see S. Murray, “The quest for conviction: Motivated cognition in romantic relationships,”
Psychological Inquiry
10:1 (1999), 23-33. For the value of wearing rose-colored glasses when viewing one’s husband, see M. Hawkins, et al., “Marital sentiment override: Does it influence couples’ perceptions?”
Journal of Marriage and Family
64:1 (February, 2002): 193-201. For the tendency of partners to look more like each other over time, see R. B. Zajonc, et al., “Convergence in the physical appearance of spouses,”
Motivation and Emotion
11:4 (December, 1987): 335-346.
This list includes only a few general overviews and the studies that receive more in-depth exploration in
Decoding Love.
I have left out a great deal of outstanding work, much of it appearing as articles in scholarly journals. In all honesty, I have been a pygmy standing on the shoulders of giants, and I have greatly appreciated the boost.
Decoding Love.
I have left out a great deal of outstanding work, much of it appearing as articles in scholarly journals. In all honesty, I have been a pygmy standing on the shoulders of giants, and I have greatly appreciated the boost.
Index
affairs.
See
infidelity
See
infidelity
age
preferences
shrinkage of dating pool
Albee, Edward
Allen, Woody,
Annie Hall
Annie Hall
Are Men Necessary?
(Dowd)
(Dowd)
Aron, Arthur
arousal
misinterpretation of signals
preceding desire
priming with fear
sensuality of viewed images
arranged marriages
attraction
expectations
men’s misinterpretations
obstacles
to opposite-sex friends
to others, while in relationship
susceptibility to priming
See also
barroom encounters
barroom encounters
attractiveness
of body vs. face
clothing and
as genetic fitness indicator
importance of
innate preference for
market value
men’s behavior and
during ovulation
proximity to attractive people and
sex of children and
similar levels of
societal advantages
babies.
See
children
See
children
Baker, Robin
barroom encounters
advice for men
advice for men and women
advice for women
initiation of touching
men’s oblivion to signals
nonverbal signals
reluctant males
stages of courtship
time of night
turnoffs
women’s control of
beauty.
See
attractiveness
See
attractiveness
Becker, Gary
Bleske, April
body chemistry
fecundity within extended family
male hormonal fluctuations
body chemistry (
cont.
)
cont.
)
neurochemistry
Oedipal attraction
ovulation and fertility cycle
smells
body language
as bulk of communication
facial animation
facial leaks
first impressions
five stages of courtship
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