Deceiving Derek (3 page)

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Authors: Cindy Procter-King

Tags: #comedy, #humor, #romantic comedy, #funny romance, #humor romance, #short story series, #contemporary short stories, #romantic comedy short stories, #cindy procterking

BOOK: Deceiving Derek
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“Is your name even Lacey?”

Her lips curled into a sweet smile.
“Yes.”

Derek tossed the shopping bag onto the bed.
Spazz continued snoring. “Miss DeMarco, I’m a police officer. We
deal with criminals. Bad people, do you understand? We don’t have
time to squander on wiener dogs with an underwear fetish.”

“Well, I—”

“Calm down, little brother,” a voice said
behind them.

Derek stiffened.
Janie
.

He should have known.

 

~*~

 

Lacey’s heart sank. Derek the Dashing
wouldn’t want anything to do with her after this! Darn. And she’d
only just met him. Yet, crazily, she knew she’d miss him.

At least Janie was back. She’d help Lacey
explain.

Derek turned to his sister. “Janie, what is
this?”

Lacey looked at her friend. “Little brother?”
Derek was far from little. Like six-feet-three-inches too far. “I
thought you were twins.” In other words, the same age.

“He’s younger than me by four minutes,” Janie
said. “That gives me big sister interference privileges. As for
you...” Janie grinned. “This is me getting you a life.” Crossing
her arms, she said smugly, “Getting
both
of you a life.”

Through the open bedroom door, Lacey glimpsed
other scavenger hunt enthusiasts returning with their booty. A few
women trumpeted cop dolls in victory fists. However, no one other
than Lacey and Claire had snared a live cop. And Claire had cheated
by renting a
fake
live cop.

“I have a life,” Lacey objected.

Derek scowled. “So do I.”

Janie snorted. “All either of you do is work.
Derek, Rosewood is enjoying its lowest crime rate in years, and
still all you do is work.”

“That’s what they pay me for...big sis.”

Lacey’s mind spun. “I don’t get it. I know my
image needs an overhaul, but I’m trying. I’m already more
assertive. Example: the scavenger hunt list said ‘policeman’. I
brought one. Claire cheated with the stripper stunt. Therefore, I
should win.”

Janie grinned. “
I
cheated. I convinced Alicia to
add policeman to the list. She knew I’d show it to you.” She winked
at Lacey.

“Oh,” Derek mumbled. “That Alicia.”

“Do you know her?” Lacey asked.

He waved a hand. “We’ve met once or
twice.”

“Three times,” Janie corrected. “I thought
they would hit it off, but Alicia said dating him was torture. But
you
two…”
She nodded at Lacey. “Yes, you and my brother might stand a
chance.” Leaning closer to Lacey, she murmured, “Claire’s stripper
surprise was a coincidence. The policeman thing was a set-up to get
you and Derek together.”

Lacey bit her lip. Yeah, Derek was hot, but—
“After Alicia said dating him was torture?”

“Hey, I’m in the room,” he grumbled.

Janie ignored her marginally younger brother.
“Alicia’s father and brothers are all in law enforcement. I thought
that would work in Derek’s favor, but I guess not. Alicia said
there’s no way she could stick it out with a cop.”

Tanya poked her head into the bedroom. “Cop?
Hey, girls,” she called over her shoulder. “Did you hear that?
Lacey’s brought us another cop!”

An avalanche of Lacey and Janie’s friends
spilled into the bedroom. Bouncing balloons trailed them.

“Will he take off his clothes?” Tanya
chortled. “Ridge is leaving. We want more.”

Janie rolled her eyes. “Where is Alicia when
I need her?”

“With Claire in the kitchen, making me
another Mudslide.” Tanya hiccupped.

Janie shoved a hand between Tanya and Derek.
“Any more Mudslides in you, my girl, and we’ll have to take you
home. My brother’s off-limits to engaged women. He’s for Lacey, if
she wants him.”

Tanya pouted. “Awww.”

Janie herded the giggling women out of the
bedroom. “I’ve done my part,” she called back. “Now you two can
hash it out.”

 

~*~

 

The bedroom door banged shut behind Derek’s
sister. Good thing, because he’d just been about to strangle
her.

Punting a long balloon out of the way, he
stepped toward Lacey. “I apologize for Janie, since she’s obviously
incapable of doing so herself. She had no right to set you up like
that. She deceived you.”

Lacey winced. “She deceived both of us. And
I
deceived
you. If either of us should apologize, it’s me. Derek, I’m
sorry.”

She sank onto the bed and stroked the
sleeping dog. Derek hadn’t seen the mutt before tonight. Alicia
must have adopted him after their disastrous dating attempts.

“Don’t worry about it.” He couldn’t fault
Lacey too much if her hijinks were responsible for her red dress.
“So you’re not the wing-nut I thought you were when you dumped
underwear all over my desk?”

“I’m anything but a wing-nut.” She sighed.
“Normally, I’m a boring workaholic, like Janie said.”

Derek let his gaze travel up Lacey’s toned
legs.
Boring? Not a
chance
. “You have a company to run. You can’t slack off and
expect Lacey’s Little Underthings to succeed.” He looked her in the
eyes. She’d told him so many half-truths tonight, he had to ask,
“Tell me Lacey’s Little Underthings is an actual company.”

She nodded. “I’m in the process of getting it
off the ground. I have a meeting with some Seattle investors next
week. This is the chance I’ve been working toward, so I didn’t want
to blow it. Janie’s helping me supercharge my image, and tonight
was part of that. Or so I thought.” She plucked the hem of her
clingy dress. “Looks like your sister and I took things too
far.”

“I’ll say. But I don’t regret that
you
did.”

Her mouth curved. “You don’t?”

“Nope.” He sat beside her on the bed. The
extra weight on the mattress toppled the shopping bag. The red
thong dribbled out to meet the gun holster on his belt. “As much as
I don’t approve of Janie’s tactics, she hit it on the nose when she
said all I do is work.”

“Same here. I haven’t had a date in so long,
I’ve forgotten what’s supposed to happen during one.”

“Maybe it’s time we each learned to let off a
little steam. Just because Janie decided to play matchmaker doesn’t
mean we can’t go for a coffee or something. I knew from the moment
we met that I’d like to ask you out. I haven’t changed my
mind.”

“I feel that way, too.” Lacey drew in a
breath. “It doesn’t bother you that I’m not as exciting as I appear
right now? I’ve never owned a dress this risqué.”

“Trust me, I find you plenty exciting.” He
picked up the slippery thong and dangled it between them, much as
she’d done at the station. “In fact, if I found you any more
exciting, I’d have a heart attack from looking at you.” Clichéd,
but true.

Her face brightened. “Then imagine what might
happen if you kissed me.”

He’d love to. But he shouldn’t. Well…

“Technically, I am off-duty.”

Her blue eyes twinkled. “There’s no case,
Derek.”

“No burglary,” he verified.

Her shoulders lifted in a ladylike shrug.
“Nothing but a girl yearning for a kiss.”

Aw, damn. He couldn’t resist her.

Dropping the thong to the mattress, he cupped
her face with one hand and covered her mouth with his. He kissed
her, gently, sweetly. Long enough to feel her lips moving in
response. And long enough to realize he honestly wanted to get to
know her—whether the scintillating red dress revealed her true
nature or not.

Reluctantly, he broke the kiss. “I should get
back. I need to finish a report.”

She smiled. “And I should return to my
friends. Tonight is for Tanya. I can’t run out on her.”

They were both so responsible it killed him.
“I want to see you soon.”

“Tomorrow night?”

He shook his head. “Too long. When does this
party end?”

“At the rate Tanya’s throwing back those
Mudslides, maybe as early as midnight.”

“Perfect. I’ll be at my desk until you’re
done. Call me.”

“Sounds great.” She retrieved her cell phone
from the shopping bag. He rattled off his number, and she
programmed it in.

As she rose from the bed, a knock rapped on
the bedroom door. Alicia’s voice carried through the wood. “Lacey?
Sorry to interrupt, but Tanya really wants to play Honeymoon
Horror, and that’s your game idea...”

“Coming,” Lacey called. She glanced at Derek.
“Promise you’re not interested in Alicia?”

“Not in ten lifetimes.” Alicia Maxwell had
more hang-ups than a prank caller. She needed a guy with the
patience to help her kick them. “We lacked a romantic vibe.” And a
whole lot more.

“Could you be friends with her?”

Derek wobbled a hand. “If necessary.”

“Great. Because I like her.” Lacey patted his
thigh, and warmth spread beneath the denim. She said, “I need to
run across the hall for the game props. Are you staying to say
goodnight to Janie?”

He nodded. “I’d like to thank my big sister
for tonight, before I describe in great detail the horrible fate in
store for her if she interferes in my life again.”

Lacey laughed. “Good luck. I’ll send her
in.”

She sashayed out of the bedroom. The chatter
of women drifted through the open door. The old dog yawned.

“Hey, Spazz, how’s life?” Derek asked.

The mutt sniffed the shopping bag, one paw
stretching toward the red thong.

“No, you don’t.” Derek grabbed the bag and
skimpy underwear to give Janie for safekeeping until Lacey returned
with her game props. The satin thong slid sensually over his
palm.

He lifted his eyebrows. His fingers itched to
stuff the sexy souvenir in his pocket—an act of total
irresponsibility and wild man abandon.

But what a souvenir of the night he’d met
Lacey.

He shot a glance to the doorway. No one was
looking. He gazed at the old dog. Did those soulful brown eyes hold
a hint of mischief?

Derek grinned. “Okay, buddy, we’re in this
together.” He lifted a finger to his mouth. “Shh. Don’t tell.”

 

 

The End

 

 

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

As a child, Cindy dreamed of becoming a
writer. Well, okay, thanks to her grade three teacher reading a
chapter of The Little House on the Prairie books to Cindy’s class
everyday, Cindy actually dreamed of becoming Laura Ingalls Wilder.
It made so much sense. After all, Cindy’s blond older sister always
got to wear blue while Cindy with the “dark as cinders” hair was
often relegated to wearing dull old pink—just like Laura. Laura was
part of a pioneer family, and until Cindy went to school she lived
in a miniscule farming community where her father and grandparents
were born. What further confirmation for her future does an
eight-year-old with an avid imagination require?

Cindy earned a degree in English Lit from the
University of Victoria before unleashing herself on the
unsuspecting workforce. However, she quickly realized her aversion
to fluorescent lights and the numbers 9-2-5 wouldn’t gain her kudos
from her various bosses. Luckily, her husband whisked her to a tiny
logging town where she couldn’t find a job, unless you count a
stint as secretary to the warden of a minimum security prison.
There, Cindy began writing novels, and she hasn’t looked back.
Because, honestly, what other employer in their right mind would
want her?

Cindy’s mission in life is to see her surname
spelled properly—with an E. So take heed. That’s P-r-o-c-t-E-r.
Not, no, never, under any circumstances should you spell Procter
with two O’s. Cindy lives in British Columbia with her family, a
cat obsessed with dripping tap water, and Allie McBeagle.

 

Website –
http://www.cindyprocter-king.com

Blog –
http://www.museinterrupted.com

Facebook –
http://www.facebook.com/cindyprocterkingauthor

Twitter –
http://www.twitter.com/cindypk

Email:
mailto:[email protected]

 

 

 

 

SNEAK PEEK AT CATCHING CLAIRE
Story 2 in LOVE & OTHER
CALAMITIES

 

Stripping off his clothes in a room full of
women was not Ridge Pedersen’s idea of a good time. But how could
he refuse when the gigs paid a good portion of his med school
bills?

Exiting the elevator, he patted the tiny bag
of coins in the pocket of his sleep pants. As he strode toward the
apartment building’s laundry, a sour dairy scent emanated from the
basket balanced against his hip. He wrinkled his nose.

Over the last month, riotous bachelorette
parties had crammed his summer weekends. Women mauled him, grabbed
him, “forgot” to tip him—and sometimes puked on him. Thankfully,
the latter hadn’t occurred at tonight’s job, although several women
had slugged back oversized drinks comprised of vodka, various
liqueurs, and cream. More than once, the petite future bride had
offered Ridge a sip from her sticky cup, splashing his cop
costume.

Shaking his head at the memory, he shouldered
into the laundry room and jerked to a stop. Beside the bulletin
board, a curvy brunette shook her booty in a purple nightie that
did wonders to her thighs. As she danced with her back to him, she
curled a messy wave of brown hair behind her ear. A skinny
electronics cord dangled from her earlobe, mostly likely attached
to a miniscule music player tucked...somewhere interesting.

Wow, she almost made up for tonight’s
annoyances.

Almost
.

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