Deborah Camp (20 page)

Tucker swallowed and searched for his voice. Not finding it, he nodded and returned her hand mirror to the stash of personal items she kept in the far corner of her bunk.

“Did you clean the fish?”

He nodded again and motioned to the bucket of water where he’d put the trout.

“I’ll bake them in the oven while it’s hot.”

Her soft gasp brought him around to face her. She stood beside the bucket, but she was staring at something else with wide, shimmering eyes. Confused, Tucker followed her sightline to the chair. The rocker! Her untimely intrusion on his self-inspection
had jarred the surprise gift from his thoughts. She placed two fingertips against the chair arm and gave a little push. When the chair rocked, she tipped back her head and laughed with delight. Something warm and mellow lifted Tucker’s heart into his throat.

“You made this? When? How?” She turned toward him to release the barrage of questions. Her gaze washed over his naked chest. She averted her eyes uncomfortably.

“I … uh …” Tucker looked around for the wool shirt Copper had made for him out of an old blanket, found it, and slipped it on. That he suddenly felt exposed and quiveringly vulnerable aggravated him. “I’ve been whittling at it for awhile. Every mother should have a decent rocking chair. Try it out.”

As if she were perching on a throne, Copper eased herself into the chair. A smile spread over her face as she began to tip back and forth, then a laugh bubbled past her lips. The sound of it was heaven to Tucker’s ears, and her wide, bewitching grin and dancing, dark eyes sent a signal down below that made him swell and tingle. He whirled away from her and pushed all ten fingers through his hair in a distracted gesture. Holy Christ! The woman had cast a spell on him. He couldn’t even look at her without getting hard! One laugh, one smile, and he was outgrowing his britches!

“I love it, Tucker. Valor will love it, too.”

“I’m glad.”

Spotting the shaving water, he picked up the shallow bowl and took it outside, glad for the task that would remove him from her company. He poured out the dirty water, strapped on his snow-shoes, and grabbed the rifle from where he’d leaned it against the outside of the cabin earlier. He hiked through the clinging snow toward the creek. He’d check the traps, he thought, forgetting that he’d already done so until he was well into
the woods and out of breath. He slumped against a cottonwood and endured the sticky sweat coating his body under his heavy clothing. He thought of the night. Another one under the same roof with her. In the wee hours he’d listened to her even, soft breathing and had taken every breath with her until sheer weariness had overtaken him. How many more nights could he lie above her when all he wanted to do was lie on top of her?

His manhood throbbed and he cursed the loneliness that enveloped him in a cruel, crushing embrace.

“Where in creation is he?” Copper asked, holding Valor and swaying from side to side as she peered out the window into the gathering gloom. A young moon rose in the sky and a few stars began to twinkle. Worry blinked inside Copper and she clenched her jaw, miffed that a man would cause her such concern.

“I’m not wandering about in the dark looking for him,” she announced. “The fool shouldn’t have left here with nary a word. If he’s hurt or in need, he’ll have to hang on until morning. I’m not about to search for him until first light.” She kissed Valor’s wrinkled forehead. “Don’t worry, sweetcheeks,” she whispered, using Tucker’s pet name for Valor. “I’m sure he got lost and was forced to make camp away from here. I’ll round him up tomorrow.”

Outside, Patrol yelped and Sentry gave an answering howl. Copper sucked in a breath and held it until she heard crunching footfalls off to the east. She craned forward for a better look out the window. Tucker emerged from a tangle of naked, icy branches, rifle in one hand and two long-eared jack rabbits in the other. He spoke sharply to the dogs and they showed their teeth, but fell silent.

Copper threw open the door and glared at him.
Twilight lit his face with blue light. The skin around his injured eye looked like a black hole with a circle of green at its center.

“Just where the
hell
have you been?” she yelled at him, stopping him in his tracks. “It’s night, if you hadn’t noticed!”

“It’s dusk.”

“It’ll be black as pitch in a few minutes. When you’re leaving, you’d better tell me from now on. I’m not going to stand around worrying about you again, you hear me? What’s wrong with you, taking off without so much as an
au revoir?
Have you no sense at all?”

“Hey, lady!” He dropped the jack rabbits at her feet. “Quit your nagging. I’m not your baby boy in short pants. I can come and go as I please. Hell’s afire, Copper, you sound like a ball-twisting wife.”

She opened her mouth to lambast him, but shut it with a click of her teeth. Whirling, she placed Valor on the lower bunk and went to the hearth to remove the fish from a warming pan she’d placed near the fire.

“Supper’s been ready for nearly an hour.”

“Sorry. I wandered farther off than I thought.”

“Someday you’ll be wandering and run up against Feet Like Wind. You should stay close to the cabin.”

“I’m sick of being hobbled.” He rubbed his leg where the weaker muscles stretched tight and quivered. “I need to test this leg anyway.” He glanced at her straight back and the plentitude of red hair spilling down it. A grin poked at the corners of his mouth. “So you’ve worked yourself into a lather worrying about me, have you? I’m truly touched.”

“It’s not like you to walk off without telling me where to and for how long. I thought you’d gone out to make water!”

“Like I said, I’m sorry.” He sighed and pushed
the back of the rocker, setting it in motion. “Have you rocked the baby yet?”

“Yes. You would have seen if you’d stayed.”

“You like the chair, do you?”

“I told you I did, didn’t I?” she parried crossly, giving him a smoking glance over her shoulder. “Set the table and light another lantern.”

“Yes,
sir!
Right away,
sir!
” He clicked his heels and saluted her.

She cast another baleful glare over her shoulder. “I’m not a sir. I’m female.”

He grinned sardonically. “You don’t have to tell me, sugar. I’ve got eyes.”

Her next look was softer and speculative. A smile glimmered in her dark gaze.

“What’s got you tickled now?” he asked.

She bobbed her shoulders. “The way you say that word.”

“Which one?”

“Sugar.”

“How do I say it?”

She wrinkled her nose and grinned. “
Shug-uh
,” she mimicked.

“That’s my mother’s Virginny accent coming through,” he admitted. “All of her young ones picked up a little of it.” He placed the plates, cups, and utensils on the table, then lit another lantern and two thick candles. “Aren’t you going to say anything about those rabbits?”

“They’ll make good meat pies.”

“Yes,” he said, drawing out the word, “and I bagged them all by myself. Bet you’re surprised that I can hunt, too.”

“I figured you could. Caught these fish, didn’t you? Although it’s a wonder you didn’t catch cold wading in that stream.” She set a platter of baked trout on the table along with a loaf of bread. “You don’t have to prove anything to me.”

He tore meat off the spikey bones. “Maybe I have to prove some things to myself. Since you
found me it seems all I’ve done is let you wait on me.”

“You were mostly dead when I found you.”

“True, and one helluva burden. Why’d you even bother with me? You could have left me out there. For all you knew I could have been one mean hombre, who would have killed you the moment your back was turned.”

She sat at the table and took a trout from the platter. “Gus says I have a soft heart.”

“Lucky for me.” He blew on a forkful of hot fishmeat and peeked at her from beneath his brows. “So you were worried about me, huh?”

“Riled is more like it. I didn’t want to go hunting for you in the morning. I’ve got better things to do.”

He chuckled. “You’re a stubborn mule.”

“And you’re a braying jackass.”

They fell into a congenial silence to finish the meal. When he’d eaten his fill, Tucker picked up the rifle again and went to check on the horses. Copper washed the dishes and put them away. She changed Valor and fed her. She was tucking the baby into the cradle when Tucker returned. He softened his footsteps so as not to disturb the sleeping babe. His sharp intake of breath a moment later spun Copper around. He was gripping his upper leg and his grimace told her that he’d been seized by a muscle spasm.

“Sit and let me massage it out.”

“No, no. I’ll be okay in a minute,” he said between clenched teeth, but sat in the nearest chair.

She dropped to her knees before him and ran her hands over his thigh until they encountered the bunched muscle. She pressed down with the heels of her hands and kneaded the knotted place. Groaning, Tucker flung his head back and closed his eyes, enduring the pain because he knew it would bring relief in a few moments. Gradually, her fingers smoothed out the muscle. A dull,
blunted ache remained. As she kept stroking his thigh, the tips of her fingers came dangerously close to the front of his britches. Heat gathered there and he began to swell. He shifted uncomfortably and wished she’d quit before another muscle started to ache.

“Guess I overdid it,” he murmured, eyes still closed, wishing she’d remove her hands from him, praying that she wouldn’t.

“Take off your pants and I’ll rub liniment on your leg. It’ll help it heal.”

“No. It’s fine now.”

“Yes, but the oils will be good for it. I’ll massage deep and work the liniment in.”

“You’ve done enough.”

“I don’t mind—”

“Copper, I’m not taking off my pants just now, so stow it.”

Puzzled by his strained voice, Copper studied his face for a moment before her gaze strayed over his chest and lower. He sat with his legs relaxed, knees spread wide. The sight of the bulge between his thighs sent a wave of heat through her. She scrambled to her feet and went to the cradle, pretending to check on the baby, who was perfectly fine and deeply asleep.

“That’s why I left so suddenly today,” he said, his voice soft and gravelly. “I’m sorry if this … well, if you’re upset. There’s little I can do about it. Unless you get ugly real fast, it’s going to happen now and again. I want you, Copper. It’s that simple.”

She shook her head. “Not me. A woman. You want a woman. I shouldn’t have been so selfish. I should have let Micah take you to someplace where there are women who will bed with you.” She looked at him from the corner of her eye. “Some would be willing without even being paid. You’re a handsome man.” Her gaze floated to the
rocker. “You made that rocking chair for me as part of a trade. The chair for my willingness.”

“No, that’s not true.” He levered himself upright in the chair. “It wasn’t a trade. I did that to repay some of the kindness you’ve shown me. No strings attached to it, I swear. As for other women, I do have a craving and I’d make do with someone else, I suppose. But I’d close my eyes and imagine you. It’s you I dream of, you I have a fire for.”

“I’d like to ease your wanting, but I can’t.” She turned to face him and gripped the edge of the cradle behind her. “I made a promise to myself never to let another man hurt me or use me.”

“I’d never hurt you, Copper.”

“You might not mean to, but you would get lost in your own pleasure and not be aware of my pain.”

“That’s not how it would be,” he protested, getting to his feet. “Your husband hurt you like that?”

She swallowed her discomfort and nodded. She glanced behind her into the cradle. “But the pain gave me Valor, too.” Her face hardened when she looked at him again. “No one will take this baby from me. I don’t need anyone but her. I’m satisfied.”

He stepped closer. “I wish I could believe that.”

“Believe it.”

Another step brought him to within a few inches of her. He noted that her breathing grew shallow and a pulse fluttered in her throat. “You’re a healthy, normal woman. You’ll want a man—eventually. That baby can give you an emotional love, but not a physical one. You need a man for that.”

She crossed her arms against her breasts protectively. “If I needed a man, I would have taken up with Micah.”

His chuckle was full of male confidence, “I don’t
think so. I watched you with him and he never made this pulse jump in your throat.” He lifted a fingertip and touched the spot. She flinched from the slight caress. He tipped his head to one side and pondered her wide eyes and parted lips. “It’s desire you feel, Copper. Don’t you remember, or have you never felt it before?”

“When my woman time came my Crow mother told me about what happens between husband and wife. I was deflowered in a ceremony and presented to my husband. It hurt, and I thought it wouldn’t hurt anymore, but it did. Each and every time, it did.” She looked away from his frowning mouth, finding his pity for her strangely comforting. “I’ll show you something …”

Copper edged past him and reached into the far corner of her bunk. She searched for a few moments before her fingers grasped the treasure. She held out an ivory hair comb for Tucker’s inspection.

“My Crow mother gave this to me before my deflowering. It’s the only thing I could take with me from my girlhood and it’s the only thing I have from my other family. I was clutching it when I was brought to camp that first day. I think it must have belonged to my real mother.”

Tucker picked up the comb. It was veined with pale gold and roses were etched in it. The teeth were blunt. One was chipped. “It’s pretty,” he whispered, suddenly full of perplexing emotion. He felt as if he had uncovered an intimate secret. He gave the fragile comb back to her. “Your mother must have been lovely and your father handsome.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

Her smile was swift. “Your eyes have grown unaccustomed to the female form and deceive you.”

He reached out to cup the side of her face. “I don’t think so.” When she didn’t move away, he eased his hand to the back of her neck and pulled her closer. She stumbled, walking stiffly, but not completely resisting. To his amazement, she pressed herself against him and her arms slid around his waist. He held her thus, too scared to breathe for fear she’d bolt from his arms like a frightened doe.