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Authors: Roseanne Dowell

BOOK: Deadbeat Dads
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Of course
we couldn’t afford it, he was too busy wining and dining the fabulous Babette. God forbid he took time away from her to spend with me. I slammed my fist against the counter. “Damn you, Johnny, you’re gonna pay.  Why should Babette benefit from all those years I scrimped while Johnny established himself? ”

The ringing phone interrupted
my thoughts. “Hello,” I snatched up the receiver.

“Whoa, guess I called at a bad time.” Becky’s cheerful voice came over the line.

“Sorry. No, not a bad time, I was just thinking about Johnny, and you know how that gets me.” I took a deep breath to calm down.

“How did your first meeting go?”

“Actually it went well. There were twelve others there. More than I dreamed would show up. They chose me chairperson and we picked a name, W.E.D.D. Anyway, we’ll meet once a month and see how it goes.” 

I
combed my hand through my hair while I talked and tried to still my trembling. “There has to be something we can do to make these jerks pay.  Most of these women don’t even know where there exes are. They’ve just up and left with no forwarding address.” Just the thought of these men made me angry all over again. The name of our group sure fit. Enraged wasn’t even strong enough.

“Wow, that’s great.
Listen, I called to see if you wanted to do lunch one day next week.”

I
loved Becky dearly, but sometimes, like now, her cheery voice and perfect life grated on my nerves. Don’t get me wrong. I didn’t begrudge her happiness. But Becky didn’t understand what it was like after almost fifteen years of marriage to suddenly find yourself without a husband and forced to get a job because the jerk wouldn’t pay his share. Not to mention the humiliation at realizing everyone but you knew he was running around. Not that I wished for my best friend to have to go through this. God forbid. And though Becky was sympathetic, she just didn’t get it.

“Hey, you fall asleep on me or something?” Becky’s voice pulled
me from my thoughts.

“I’m sorry, Beck. I’m not sure I can get away next week. The office is hectic right now. How about the weekend? Saturday or Sun
day works for me.” Not that it would work for Becky. Fred wouldn’t let her out when he was home. Heaven forbid, he’d have to baby-sit.

Fred was so much like Johnny it was pathetic.
I kept trying to tell Becky to break out, stand up for herself, and get a job. Not be so dependent. But Becky thought her marriage was different. After all, didn’t she have the perfect life with her three kids and Fred a dentist? They lived in a big beautiful home that I envied.

How many times had
I suggested we buy a house like that? But, as usual, there was always an excuse – we couldn’t afford it, he wasn’t established enough, one thing after another. And now look, he lived three streets from Becky in that fancy new development.

“Beck, can you do me a favor and watch Josh for a while this evening
? Katie’s doing an overnighter at Jessie’s, and I have something I need to do.”

This had
gone on long enough. Tonight I’d confront Johnny and demand he pay or I’d have him thrown in jail. Connections or not he’d spend a few hours there anyway.  Then I’d demand my lawyer take him to court. Trouble is these damn lawyers stuck together. I had even gone out of the county to hire one and wouldn’t you know it, he knew Johnny, too. Went to school with him. No matter, tonight I’d follow him to his club if I had to and embarrass him in front of all his friends. Let them see what a jerk he was.

“Sure, what time? Alice is spending the night at Jessie’s too, but Sam and Larry will be here.”

I looked at the clock. If I fed the kids right away, I’d be able to intercept Johnny at work. “About five thirty, okay? I’ll drop Josh off and take Alice and Katie to Jessie’s. I shouldn’t be gone long.”

 

After I dropped Katie and Alice off at Jessie’s, I went to Johnny’s office. Not quite six o’clock, Johnny should still be there. If not, I’d go to his home and club if necessary. We were going to have this out once and for all. I was tired of him avoiding me and that little bimbo secretary’s whiny voice over the phone. “I’m sorry. Mr. Morris is at a meeting. Mr. Morris is tied up. Mr. Morris is out of the office. I’ll give Mr. Morris the message.”

I
knew darn well he wasn’t that busy. I’ll bet she didn’t give him half the messages either. I slammed my hand against the steering wheel.  “Well this time, Mr. Morris, you aren’t going to avoid me.” 

I
pulled into the parking garage and hurried up the back steps to his 3
rd
floor office.  I knew Johnny’s habit to take the steps instead of the elevator.

“Gives me a bit of exercise,” he told
me once. I doubted if he changed that habit. He was too vain about his weight. I’d just wait for him here and have it out. No sense in making a scene in his office. I didn’t want anyone to know about this visit. Not unless I had to go to the club, and then I didn’t care who knew. A quick look at the security camera assured me it still didn’t work. No blinking green light. Johnny had complained about it for over a year.

A few minutes later
, I heard footsteps and looked at my watch. Five after six, right on schedule, Mr. Morris. I backed up on the landing and waited for the door to open. Johnny came out and looked as handsome as the day I married him.

My
heart did a little flutter. I still had feelings for him even after all he put me through. He sported an expensive new top coat and, as usual, his sandy brown hair looked perfectly styled. How dare he ignore his responsibility to his kids?

“Well, Mr. Morris, we finally meet.”
I stepped out of the shadows.

“Erica, what are you doing here?” Johnny looked at his watch. “I can’t talk now, I have a dinner engagement.”

“Oh you’re going to do more than talk, Johnny. You’re going to pay and pay now. And don’t give me that crap about your checkbook being at home. You probably carry enough cash on you to pay a year’s worth of child support.” I stepped in front of him.

“Erica, don’t be ridiculous. I’ll send you a check first thing tomorrow morning.” He put his hands on
my shoulders and pushed me aside.

“No more false promises, Johnny. You’ve told me that too many times
, and I’m not falling for it this time. I want money for your kids, and I want it now.”

Johnny looked at
me, tipped his head back, and laughed. “Or what, you’re going to throw me in jail? Get a life, Erica.”

That did it!
Anger welled up in me. Bitterness filled my mouth. I raised my hand to strike out at Johnny. He grabbed my hand midway.

“That’s not a good idea.” He
shoved me backwards and turned to leave.

I’ve heard the saying saw red before, but never really knew what it meant
until now. Vivid shades of red flashed in front of my eyes. Everything I saw had a red tint to it. I rubbed my wrist where Johnny had squeezed it. Tears stung my eyes. Try as I might, I couldn’t hold them back. That bastard was going to pay now. I was tired of him putting me off.

“Johnny!”
I screamed at him. He half turned to look at me, missed the step, fell forward and tumbled down the stairs. I stared at him lying at the bottom. His head turned to the side, blood oozed from his mouth. His eyes stared up at me. It didn’t look like he was breathing.  I rushed down the steps.

Oh my God, what
had I done?  I knelt next to him, felt for a pulse, nothing. “He’s dead.” My voice echoed in the stairwell. I leaned back on my knees, covered my mouth to squelch the scream rising in my throat. “Oh my God, oh my God, I’ve killed him.” My body trembled, but somehow I pulled myself to my feet and looked around the empty stairwell. I had to get out of here.

I
stepped over his body and looked around. Thank goodness, no one was around. I gathered up my purse, and raced down the steps to my car. I started it and squealed out of the garage, glad the attendant was gone. Tears blurred my eyes. Johnny was dead, and I killed him.  He was a rat, but he didn’t deserve to die.

I
pulled into Becky’s a few minutes later.

“What’s wrong?” 
Becky only had to take one look at me to see something was wrong.

I
didn’t even take off my coat. I sank in a chair, wishing it would swallow me. “I’ve done a horrible thing.”

Becky poured each of
us a cup of coffee and sat at the table next to me. “What happened?”

I couldn’t hold back the t
ears. They streamed down my face as I told my friend about Johnny. I still couldn’t believe he was dead. Couldn’t believe I had something to do with it. “I panicked. I ran.”

“You have to call the police.” Becky rubbed
my hand. “It’s okay, Erica, it was an accident, but you have to call the police. He fell, it wasn’t your fault.”

“No, I can’t. How can I prove it was an accident? We were arguing. He laughed at me. Do you know how humiliating that is? He laughed at me.
I shuddered and the anger returned. “That bastard laughed at me. All I asked was for him to take responsibility for his kids-give them what they deserved. He lives in that big fancy house with his new wife and kid and my kids, his kids are ignored. That’s not fair.”

Becky shook her head. “Erica, look I know you didn’t mean to do it
, but you have to call the police. You can’t just let him lay there.”

I
looked at my friend. She just didn’t get it. If I called the police there’d be an investigation. I knew I’d end up in jail. I stood up. “Can you keep Josh overnight? I need time to think.”

Becky nodded. “Yeah but I still think…”

I raised my hand to quiet her. “I know what you think. Just promise me you won’t tell anyone. Okay?”

Becky nodded. “Okay.”

I pulled into my drive a few minutes later. What to do? Could I just let Johnny lay there until someone found him? I unlocked the door and ran to the bathroom and threw up. Afterwards, I splashed cold water on my face and tried to calm down. I felt bad Johnny was dead, really I did.

Now
his kids wouldn’t get anything from him. I wondered if he had changed over his insurance policy. More than likely, knowing Johnny. I hoped he at least listed the kids as beneficiaries. How cold and callous I sounded. My ex-husband was dead. I killed him, and all I worried about was if the kids would benefit from his insurance. When had I turned into such a shallow person? I made a pot of coffee and turned on the television.  I needed to think, to sort this out. I curled up in the corner of the couch.

The news was just ending, but the newscaster broke in with a breaking story. “The body of attorney, John Morris, was found
on the steps of the parking garage at the Standard Building.  Police are investigating, but there are no signs of foul play. It appears to be an accident. We’ll update you when we learn more.”

At least
they found him. Now I didn’t have to worry about calling the police. An accident, I’d be off the hook.  I grabbed the phone and dialed my friend. “Becky, did you watch the news on channel five? They found Johnny’s body.”

“No the boys are playing a game I don’t have the television on. Who found it? When?”

“They didn’t say who found it. The police think it was an accident.  I have to let them think that, Beck. Besides, it was. I’ll come over and get Josh. I’ll see you in a little bit.”

God, how was
I going to tell the kids their father was dead?  I dialed the phone again and called Susan Burns. I hated to do it, but I had to pick up Katie, too.

I
picked Josh up first and broke the news. 

“How, what happened?” Josh wiped tears from his eyes.

I hugged him.  “It was an accident. He fell down the steps in the parking garage. They aren’t sure what happened, maybe he had a heart attack. I don’t know.” I certainly couldn’t tell him I killed his father. I drove to Jessie’s to pick up Katie.

It had been hard to tell the kids their father left and was getting a divorce, but that was nothing compared to this. It didn’t matter that Johnny didn’t visit
or call. He was still their father, no matter what kind of a jerk he was.

Katie burst into tears when
I told her.  “Daddy’s dead. He can’t be. I mean….” Her body shook and her tears turned into gut-wrenching sobs.

I held my daughter and tried to comfort her.  Lord, what had I done? How were we going to get through this? I guessed I’d have to call Babette, offer to help, see if there was anything she needed. Cripe, she was just a kid herself, only twenty-five and with a new baby. The fact that she stole my husband didn’t enter into it. If it hadn’t been Babette, it would have been someone else. I couldn’t really blame the girl, Johnny was good-looking and a smooth talker. I had no doubt he made the advances. Sure, Babette could have resisted and should have known better, but I still couldn’t lay all the blame on her.

 

Chapter Three

 

Once Katie and Josh were settled, I picked up the phone, took a deep breath, and dialed. “Babette, this is Mrs. Morris, I just….”

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