Authors: Brenda Novak
“That’s…nice,” she whispered between breaths, her arms tightening around him. “So nice.”
He wanted it to be better than nice. He wanted it to be perfect for her. So he forced himself to slow down, to draw the pleasure out as long as possible. But it was only a few seconds later that she gasped out his name and shuddered in his arms. And then he couldn’t have held back for anything.
Grace listened to Kennedy’s deep, even breathing as he slept with his body tight against hers. Contentment flowed through her veins. She was warm and comfortable, complete in a way she’d never experienced, but she refused to succumb to sleep. She already felt as if she was dreaming. Staying in Evonne’s house, making love with Kennedy Archer. Was it even real?
She moved slightly, adjusting her pillow. His hand closed possessively over her breast, making him feel real enough. But she didn’t roll over as she wanted to. She knew if she gave him the opportunity, he’d want to make love again. They’d already tried several alternatives. Nothing else could compare to that first time, but they’d used their only condom, and she doubted he’d see anything positive in giving her the baby he didn’t even know she wanted.
“Grace?” he murmured after a moment.
“What?”
“I still think we should go to the fireworks tomorrow night.”
Grace wished she could agree, but she knew it wouldn’t be wise for them to go together. Like her, he just didn’t want their brief affair to end. “No.”
“What about Teddy and Heath? They’ll be disappointed.”
She hated the thought of hurting Kennedy’s children. But she couldn’t allow them to grow any more attached to her. “I’ll see you all there, I guess. I need to start weaning them from me.”
He didn’t seem pleased with her response. “Why not tell me what we’re fighting here?”
She couldn’t burden him with her secrets, or he’d face the same torment she did. “
You’re
not going to be fighting anything.”
“If you really want to protect me, tell me.”
It didn’t work that way, and he knew that as well as she did. But when she didn’t respond, he climbed out of bed. “Fine. It’s late. I’d better go.”
“Do you think your babysitter will be watching the clock?” she asked to temper the sudden estrangement between them.
“I’m sure she’s asleep. Thursdays are my usual night out, so she typically stays over. I doubt she’ll even notice when I come in.” Completely unconcerned with his nudity, he bent to gather his clothes, which were strewn on the floor.
Grace couldn’t help enjoying the sight of his muscular physique. She couldn’t believe how easily she’d been able to make love with him. It had come naturally, without the crippling memories and distaste she’d experienced so often with George. At times she’d felt
close
to normal when she was with her old boyfriend. Last night, she’d felt
completely
normal. Whole. In love. Nothing else could compare.
She knew it was a sign of how much she wanted to be with Kennedy. But acknowledging that didn’t make their situation any easier. He’d always been out of reach.
“Good night,” he said and started from the room.
Grace winced at the sting of his withdrawal. He was angry with her. He was like Clay; he expected her to hand everything over to him and let him be in charge.
“There’s something I should tell you,” he said, turning back as he reached the door.
Grace sat up, drawing the sheet with her. “What’s that?”
“If there’s anything more you can do to protect yourself from whatever happened in the past, do it.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, the old tension returning.
“Someone saw Clay driving Barker’s car the night the reverend disappeared. It was late, around midnight, and he was heading out of town. Your mother was following him.”
She could tell that Kennedy was watching her closely, so she absorbed what he said without letting the shock of it register on her face.
“Grace?”
She was trying to say he shouldn’t worry, that it wasn’t true—or make up some other lie—but she couldn’t. What had passed between them was too fresh, too honest. So she said nothing.
His eyes swept over her as if he’d come back and make love to her again right now, if only she’d tell him the truth.
It was certainly a temptation. She already felt she’d trade just about anything for one more kiss.
“God, Grace, are you really going to let me go so easily?” he asked.
“There’s nothing I can do,” she said helplessly.
“I know you care about me. A woman doesn’t make love like that unless she cares.”
She blinked against the tears that threatened. She couldn’t endanger her family because of her own selfish desires. “You should be glad,” she said softly.
“Glad that you won’t even give us a chance?”
“Glad that I won’t tell you anything else. Go home, Kennedy,” she said. “We both knew it could only last until morning.”
Kennedy cursed as he hurried to his truck. Grace had said that one night wouldn’t change anything. But that was bullshit. He’d known it then, too. He just hadn’t been able to resist her offer. And now he was going to pay the price. He could smell her on his clothes, his skin, still craved her. He knew he’d never be able to look at her again without wanting to feel her beneath him, just the way it had been a few hours ago.
She’d given herself without reserve—given everything except the one thing keeping them apart.
As he got to his truck, something moved in his peripheral vision and he whipped around to find Joe standing in the shadows.
“Have a good night?” Joe asked, his face contorted in the light thrown off by his lighter as he lit a cigar.
Joe rarely smoked, unless he was drunk. “Don’t start,” Kennedy said. “I’m not in the mood.”
His friend motioned toward the house. “She’s quite a change after Raelynn, isn’t she? Or maybe that’s the attraction, what I’m missing in all of this. You clean-cut, successful guys occasionally like to go slumming. You want to take a walk on the wild side, Kennedy? See what you can get from a whore like Grace?”
Kennedy clenched his jaw. “I don’t know what you’re doing here, but you need to leave—now.”
The end of Joe’s cigar glowed in the dark as he lifted it to his mouth. “Why?” he said, laughing. “It’s my turn, isn’t it? That was how it worked in high school. We passed her around. With a woman like her, there’s no need to be selfish. Maybe when I’m finished with her, I’ll give Buzz a call.”
Kennedy didn’t know he was going to do it until it was too late, until he’d already launched himself at Joe and taken him down. In one part of his brain, he knew Joe was purposely provoking him and told himself to ignore it. But then he slugged Joe right in the face.
Joe had obviously been expecting a reaction, but not one as explosive as he got. “What the hell are you—” He didn’t finish. Blood was pouring from his nose, filling his mouth. He tried to get out from under Kennedy, take a few swings. But his attempt to fight back only gave Kennedy an excuse to really let go. He hit Joe
again and again, as if Joe was his worst enemy and not the man who’d once saved his life.
“You son of a bitch,” Joe cried, throwing his own punches. But Kennedy was in too close for Joe to do any harm.
The flash of shock and anger that caused Joe to fight back quickly dissipated. Soon he simply covered his face and hollered for Kennedy to stop.
Kennedy finally allowed Joe to get up, but the moment he stood, Joe took another swing.
Dodging the blow, Kennedy tackled him again, this time slamming his head into the cement of the driveway.
Joe immediately capitulated. “I give. Kennedy, stop! I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry. Let me up.”
Kennedy was breathing hard when he released Joe. Slowly he backed off, ready to defend himself if necessary. But Joe didn’t try anything else. He wiped at the blood on his mouth and chin as they stood there, glaring at each other.
“This isn’t over,” Joe said, spitting blood on the ground. “You wait. Even the Archer name won’t be able to save you now.”
“Why don’t we finish it here?” Kennedy asked.
Grace’s door opened before Joe could respond, and she came hurrying out in a bathrobe. “What’s happening?” she cried. “What’s going on?”
Joe gave her a murderous look. “
You
are,” he said. Then he slung the blood dripping from his chin at her with his fingers and stomped off.
Kennedy cursed silently as he watched Joe leave. He’d just thrown a match on fresh kindling, and he knew it.
Shaking the pain from his hands, he climbed into his truck.
Grace grabbed the door before he could shut it, but he couldn’t look at her just then.
“Are you okay?” she asked, sounding worried.
“Stay inside and keep the house locked,” he said. Then he pulled his door out of her grasp, backed up and burned rubber as he drove away.
T
he next morning, Kennedy peeked into Teddy’s room to discover that he was already awake and counting the money he’d been keeping in a large plastic ice cream tub.
“How much do you have now?” he asked, leaning a shoulder against the doorjamb.
Teddy glanced up. “Almost a hundred and fifty dollars.”
“That’s a lot of money. What are you going to do with it?”
Kennedy knew his youngest child had been saving up, but Teddy wouldn’t say what for.
“There’s something I want to buy.”
“How much does it cost?”
“A lot.”
“Is it a toy?”
Teddy shook his head.
“How much more money do you need?”
“I’m not sure.” Teddy pursed his lips. “Maybe two hundred dollars?”
“Wow, that
is
a lot.” What could an eight-year-old desire for three hundred and fifty dollars? “If you won’t tell me what you want, how are you going to go and buy it?” he asked.
Teddy contemplated the neat stacks of quarters and piles of dollar bills. “Maybe I’ll ask Grandma to take me.”
“I guess you could do that.” He sauntered into the room. “You’ve certainly been saving for a long time.”
“Ever since Mom died,” he said.
Kennedy sat on the bed. He was self-conscious about his hand, which he’d injured fighting with Joe last night. But Teddy would see it when they had breakfast if he didn’t see it now.
“What happened?” his son asked, spotting his swollen knuckles almost immediately.
Kennedy tried to make a fist, but the pain was too great. He’d iced his hand all night, hoping to alleviate the swelling, but it wasn’t gone down yet. He doubted he’d broken anything. He could move all his fingers. But it hurt like hell and would probably take a few days to heal.
“Dad?” Teddy prompted.
Heath stuck his head in the room, his hair mussed from sleep. “You guys are up already? Wow, look at that,” he said, also zeroing in on Kennedy’s hand. “How’d you get hurt?”
Kennedy wanted to tell them he’d had an accident of some sort, but the way word spread in Stillwater, he knew they’d learn the truth at some point and he didn’t want to be caught in a lie. “I hit Joe.”
“You got in a
fight?
” they cried.
Kennedy could hear the echo of every lecture he’d given them on solving problems without violence and wondered how far he’d set himself back on that issue.
Do as I say, not as I do….
That wasn’t the kind of parent he wanted to be. And it wasn’t the kind he’d been in the past. He still wasn’t sure why he’d attacked Joe
last night. It was as if he’d been trying to force a change physically, since he couldn’t affect circumstances in any other way. When he’d made love to Grace, he’d been fighting to erase the past and create a more hopeful future. When he’d hit Joe, he’d been fighting to force him to back off and leave Grace alone.
Unfortunately, he’d only made the situation worse—for everyone.
“Joe was drunk,” he explained. “He said some stupid things, and I lost my temper.” He stretched out his hand so they could get a better look at the results. “I wouldn’t recommend ever doing this. I’m sure I hurt him. And I certainly didn’t do myself any favors, as you can see.”
“Did he hit you first?” Teddy asked.
Kennedy cringed inside. “No.”
Teddy’s eyebrows went up. “Did he hit you back?”
“He tried.”
“But you beat him up, right, Dad?” Heath said proudly, and began to hop around, shadowboxing.
“Fighting doesn’t solve anything,” Kennedy replied. “I’m sure there’ll be more problems resulting from this than would’ve occurred otherwise, and I’ve got only myself to blame.”
Heath stopped his Rocky imitation. “What kind of problems?”
The phone rang, saving Kennedy from venturing a guess.
“I’ll get it,” Heath said and ran down the hall.
Kennedy figured the problems he’d just mentioned were already starting when Heath brought him the cordless phone. “It’s Grandma.”
Wonderful. If Camille was calling him this early, she’d probably heard the news.
Using his good hand, Kennedy held the phone to his ear. “Hello?”
“Is it true?” Camille said without preamble. “Did you really break Joe Vincelli’s nose?”
“I hit him a few times. I don’t know if I broke his nose.”
Silence.
“Mom, you there?” he said.
“According to his mother, you broke his nose
and
you gave him a black eye.”
“Oh, well—” he studied his swollen hand “—that’s good, I suppose. I wouldn’t want it to have been for nothing.”
“You think this is funny?”
“Does it matter? I can’t change it now.” He would’ve added that the expression on Joe’s face
had
been kind of funny, but he didn’t want the boys to hear him acknowledge it.
“So, why did it happen?” she asked.
Kennedy let go of a long breath and walked over to the window. “We got in a fight. That’s all.”
“That sounds like an explanation I might get from Teddy.”
“Why elaborate? I’m not particularly proud of myself. How’d you hear about it so fast?”
“Elaine called me less than five minutes ago. She’s nearly hysterical, saying they’re going to sue you, file charges for assault and work tirelessly to see that you never hold public office in this town. She even said they’re going to start a petition demanding your resignation at the bank.”
“Is that all?” Kennedy said dryly.
“Kennedy,”
his mother replied. “What’s going on? You’ve never been in a fight before.”
He had no answer for her. He was hiding evidence, sleeping with Grace, punching Joe. He’d be better off without any of it, but one thing seemed to lead to the next. And he couldn’t say he regretted sleeping with Grace. He knew he’d do it again if she ever gave him the chance. Last night had been satisfying in a very primitive way. He felt his body stir just thinking about it.
“Is it your father?” she asked, lowering her voice. “Is this some sort of reaction to his illness? I know it’s affecting you. It’s affecting all of us.”
“I gave Joe what he deserved,” he said. “What happened doesn’t have anything to do with Dad.” The fact that life could be fleeting, that he didn’t want to waste a moment of it, might’ve played a role. But that was only a small part of everything going on. Mostly it came down to wanting something he couldn’t have. He knew what it was like to love as deeply as he’d loved Raelynn. And he knew what it was like to lose the woman who’d meant so much to him. He wanted to fill the hole that had been left in his family when she died. Not just for himself, but for his children.
Unfortunately, they seemed to have chosen a woman whose past made that impossible.
“Elaine claims the fight was over Grace. That you were at her house at three in the morning.”
This was where it all grew worse…. “That’s true.”
“I can guess what you were doing there. What I can’t figure out is why Joe was with you.”
“He wasn’t with me. He was lurking outside.”
“Lurking?”
She hesitated as though tempted to give up her antagonistic approach. He could hear her sigh. “You were still stupid to do what you did.”
“Thanks,” he said with a grimace. “It helps to have you spell out the things I already know.”
She ignored him. “We have to do something to stem the tide of public opinion.”
“What can we do, except tell the truth? He was trespassing, he called Grace some unflattering names and I hit him. What more is there?”
“We have to prove that Grace isn’t what everyone’s always thought, that she was abused, like you said. Then you’ll come off like a white knight for seeing the truth when no one else could. She’ll finally get the respect she deserves, and—”
“She deserves?” he interrupted. “Don’t tell me you’re having a change of heart, Mother dear.”
“Stop, will you? I’m working on damage control here. We have to make Joe look like the bad guy.”
“Joe
is
the bad guy. He’s a complete—” Kennedy turned to see Heath and Teddy, listening to every word, and quickly amended his remarks “—moron. But we can’t do what you’re suggesting.”
“Why not? You told me you have proof.”
“Forget it. I won’t drag Grace’s most tragic moments out for everyone to see. If she wanted that, she would’ve done it herself.”
“We’d be doing her a favor. What happened to her makes her very sympathetic.”
“No.”
“I’m willing to befriend Grace, Kennedy, but not at the cost of what it could do to you.”
The automatic sprinklers came on, sending a spray of water against the window. Kennedy watched the droplets roll down the pane. “We have bigger things to worry about.”
“Bigger than your future?”
He shoved a hand through his hair. “My future will be what it is. How’s Dad feeling?”
There was a long pause. “He’s going to be fine.”
“Just take care of him, okay, Mom?” Kennedy said, imbuing his voice with some of the urgency he felt. He didn’t want the decisions he’d made to affect his parents at such a critical time. “I can take care of myself.”
He expected her to respond with something like, “You haven’t been doing a very good job of it lately,” but she didn’t.
“I know it was hard to lose Raelynn,” she told him. “But your father’s going to make it.”
“I’d better go,” he said. “I’ve got to get to the bank.” He could predict the kind of day he’d face as the story of the fight spread through town, but he figured he might as well get it over with. It beat talking about death with his mother. All the talk in the world wouldn’t stop the Grim Reaper if he was on his way.
“Are you bringing the boys over here, or to Grace’s house?” she asked.
He turned to watch Teddy gather up his money. “I won’t be seeing Grace anymore.”
“What about the fireworks tonight?” Teddy cried, overhearing.
Kennedy covered the phone. “She’s going with her sister. She’ll see you there.”
“No,” the boys cried, almost in unison.
Kennedy gestured for silence. “You’ll see her, I promise.”
“Isn’t it a little late to give Grace up now?” Camille asked.
He thought of what Janice had told him and wondered where Clay had hidden Barker’s car. “The stakes only go up from here,” he replied.
Camille Archer perched on the couch in her living room, facing her husband, who sat across the coffee table from her, drinking the green tea she’d made for him. “So what do you think?” she asked.
Otis ran a hand over his jaw. He hadn’t shaved yet, but he’d decided to edge the lawn before the sun grew too hot. The scent of fresh-cut grass lingered on his clothes. Camille had tried to talk him out of exerting himself. She didn’t know what she’d do if they couldn’t get his cancer into remission. She didn’t want to live without him and constantly pleaded with him to take it easy. Kennedy had promised to edge the grass tonight, since the boys weren’t old enough to do that part of the yardwork. But Otis wasn’t the type to sit around. As long as there was half a breath left in him, he’d work at something. She supposed he had to, for his own peace of mind. He probably enjoyed the menial tasks he insisted on doing now that he wasn’t feeling well enough to spend many hours at the office. At least he took what he did slowly, at his own pace, and often came in to rest.
“Sounds to me like he cares about her,” he said simply.
“He and Raelynn had a good relationship. He could be on the rebound.”
“I think it goes deeper than that. He’s fighting it, but no other woman’s even turned his head since Raelynn.” Otis stared off into space before focusing on her again. “And if I don’t make it—”
She stiffened. “Don’t talk like that.”
“Listen to me,” he said gently. “If I’m not going to make it, I want to die knowing my son is happy.”
“But would you trade happiness now for sorrow later?”
“She was only thirteen when Barker disappeared. I suspect she’s as innocent as he claims she is.”
“What about her family?”
“It’s time this town forgot the past and moved on.”
“That’s easy for us to say. It’s not our loved one who’s missing.”
“I want to support Kennedy in the relationship. It might be the last thing I’m able to do for him.”
Camille had talked to Grace several times since the boys had started going over there so often and had begun to like her in spite of her earlier prejudice. Heath and Teddy worshipped her. And Kennedy was, at the very least, infatuated with her.
“If only he’d give us the proof he told me about,” she said. “The fact that he attacked Joe, who nearly drowned saving his life, tells me he’d sacrifice anything to protect her. But I think it might be best for both of them if the truth finally came out. It might be the only way they can be together.”
Otis winced as he shifted his position, and worry burned like hot acid in Camille’s stomach.
“Are you okay?”
He grinned slightly. “Stop worrying, woman. I’m fine.”
“Maybe you should lie down—”
He put up a hand to stop her fussing over him and went back to their conversation. “Can’t you talk Kennedy into telling you what this proof is?”
“I don’t think so. I’ve tried.”
“Do you want me to speak to him?”
Camille thought Otis could get the information out of him—if anyone could. But she didn’t want to force Kennedy to choose between the woman he desired and the father he loved. If only she could fig
ure out what he had, she’d know whether it could help them in some way. Then, if it turned out not to be worth the pain it might cause Grace, she’d forget about it. “Maybe later,” she said. “I’m going to talk to Buzz.”
“You think Buzz might know something about it?” Otis asked in obvious surprise.
“He and Kennedy have been close for years. If anyone knows anything, it’ll be Buzz.”
“Have you seen Joe’s face?” Grace asked as she, Madeline and Irene carried a blanket, a picnic basket and a bag of fireworks through the gate of the Stillwater High football field. The fact that one of the town’s mayoral candidates had left her house in the middle of the night and beaten up the guy who’d once saved his life had started a big scandal. Grace didn’t want to be here tonight, giving all the gossips a focal point. But Madeline and her mother wouldn’t hear of her skipping out. Besides, Teddy had called to make sure she was coming. She didn’t want to disappoint him and Heath.