Dead Chaos (10 page)

"No. Thank you, Brynhildr. I am sure there is somewhere you need to be soon enough." A shiver ran up my spine. Was he being prophetic again? I did need to see Odin though. Maybe that was it?

As much as my visit to Mimir had been enlightening, a part of me wished I'd just let well enough alone.

Sometimes knowing your future just messes with your head.

***

On entering Odin’s hall, it became clear that I wouldn’t get an audience with Odin any time soon. The hall bustled with conversation while a large contingent of the highest-ranking Ulfr in Fen’s army filled the hall, waiting before the dais. Odin remained deep in conversation with another god I'd never seen before.

Thor came up beside me and grunted. "Vidarr. What is he doing here?"

"Who is Vidarr?" I asked, feeling the weight and breadth of my ignorance again.

"Vidarr is my brother, god of Vengeance. And until recently, he has also been the god of Silence. But now he speaks." Thor's forehead twisted into a frown as he watched his brother and father on the dais. I expected him to join them but he remained rooted to the spot.

A rustle of movement drew my gaze back to the gathering in front of Odin. An Ulfr I recognized as being one of Fen’s right-hand men stepped forward and fell to one knee. He placed a fist to his breast and waited with his head bowed for the All-Father to speak.

"Rise, Ulfr Ivarr. What is it you wish to discuss this day?" asked Odin, his eyes roaming the now-crowded hall.

"I apologize for the sudden request for an audience, my lord. It is just that we are desperate for your word." Ivarr rose to his feet.

"It is no bother, Ivarr. What can I help you with?"

"The army would like to re-pledge our loyalty to you, my lord, and to all of Asgard." The gathered Ulfr stood silent behind Ivarr and I could feel the tension in their bodies as they awaited Odin's response. I snuck a glance at Thor beside me. I should probably leave but from the state of things, it was too late for me to sneak away. "We do understand that of late, things have not been at its best. But what has happened has been dealt with, the traitor has been punished. Therefore the army is seeking your approval, my lord."

"But, Ivarr, your loyalty should be, now and always, for your general, Fenrir." Odin spoke kindly, as if to a child and a spurt of alarm ran through me. Was he actually going to deny this entire gathering their pledge to him?

"I assure you, my lord, that our loyalty to Fenrir has remained unchanged. It is with his blessing that we seek to pledge our loyalty to you."

"So why has he not joined you today?" asked Odin, his voice moving up a notch to slight annoyance.

"I am here, my lord." Fen's voice rose from the back of the room. "I apologize for being late. I did think that Ivarr would manage on his own, though."

"I understand, Fenrir. I needed to be sure you were aware of the actions of your Ulfr."

"Thank you, my lord. I am aware and I fully support them in their pledge. In fact I re-pledge my loyalty, support, and my life to you, again." Fen knelt before Odin, head bowed, waiting.

"Very well, Fenrir. I have given you time to heal, and if you are certain, I see no reason to deny you."

The God Vidarr leaned in and spoke to Odin. "But, Father, I think it would be unwise."

"Why is that, my son?" Odin looked at the younger god, an expression of calm curiosity on his face. Fen rose to his feet giving Vidarr a strange look before motioning for his contingent to leave. As they filed out of the hall Vidarr continued, uncaring who heard him challenge his father. "Because he is the one meant to slay you, Father. I do not understand why you allow him so close to you."

"Fenrir has been loyal for many centuries, Vidarr. He has proven his pledge to me."

"But, Father, one’s destiny is seldom avoided. And Fenrir is destined to kill you. How can you be comfortable with that?"

"As you are destined to kill Fenrir, my son. One’s destiny can be changed with the choices one makes. Do not believe that what is foretold is unchangeable." Odin's spoke directly to his son but his voice travelled throughout the hall. I felt his words cut deep, coming so recently from Mimir.

Thor seemed to have forgotten I was still there and he left my side to join Fen as he exited the hall. Seemed nobody wanted to be around while Odin and Vidarr spoke.

I didn't think I'd get much chance to speak to Odin now, so I decided to leave. But Odin’s voice rang out, halting me in my tracks. "Valkyrie Brynhildr, do you wish to speak with me?"

I nodded warily, glancing at the scowling Vidarr whose face was red and tight.

"Stay, please," said the All-Father.

Despite the glowering Vidarr, I approached the dais.

To face Odin’s wrath for disobedience.

***

I looked up to see a sheepish-looking Odin now in the form of the old, grey-bearded man with the large, black floppy hat. Vidarr had disappeared. "Are you still offended, Bryn?"

Although I was used to both Odin’s forms I had to admit the sudden change caught me off guard. Not that I didn’t like it. In fact I preferred the old, dark-robed god to the oversized gold-and-bronze Warrior. Less intimidating.

"I'm sure I will get over it, my lord." I hid a smile, surprised he was still thinking of his Midgard female quip from earlier on. I’d forgotten about it. "I'm glad you’ve returned. I need to speak with you about something very important."

"Speak then." Odin settled back in the now overlarge throne.

Should I should warn him that he wasn’t going to like what I was about to say?

Maybe it was best to just say it?

"I have heard the prophecy of Mimir and I wish to go on a mission to speak personally to the Norns," I said, cringing inside, waiting for his reaction.

"And how is it that you came to know of this prophecy?" Odin asked, his voice cool and deadly.

I brought Odin up to speed on what I overheard Frigga say and how I met and spoke to Mimir. Odin's face twisted with anger. "Valkyrie Brynhildr, you were not meant to know of this prophecy."

"But why, my lord? It pertains to me and to my own destiny." Odin didn't reply. "Are you worried I may be in danger? Or that I may be weakened but the loss of my wings?"

"Both, child. This was never your war to begin with," Odin said, rising from his throne to pace the length of the dais. "I do not believe you should consult with the Norns. Leave it alone, Brynhildr."

"But I don't think I have a choice. I have to know what my destiny is and how I can change it. Especially if it means my fate will endanger the lives of the people I care about." I knew Odin would understand that I was talking about him.

The All-Father scratched his beard and seemed deep in thought. Then he looked up, met my eyes and said, "Very well, you may go, but you will need to take extra care on your journey. And you must take a team with you for your protection. The Jotunn do not take kindly to trespassers. Although I do not think it likely they will detect you."

I nodded, sure that my friends would be happy to accompany me. "There is something else I need to tell you about Loki." My fingers went automatically to my cheek as I spoke.

"What is it?" Odin sighed as if the mere thought of Loki tired him.

"He hijacked my ride on the Bifrost when I went back to Midgard." Odin sat forward on his throne. That got his attention. "He wanted me to give myself up for Brody’s return."

"I hope you told him no."

I lifted my chin and said, "I told him to go to Hel." I still felt guilty that I willingly chose to leave Brody in Loki’s clutches.

"Good." Odin frowned. "What did he say to that?"

"He was furious. He flew off but not before he gave me this scar."

Odin rubbed his lined forehead and stared into the distance a moment. The weight of the world did lie on his shoulders. "Thanks for letting me know. I know I have been quite busy, but you have done well." He nodded again almost more to himself than to me. "And I want you to meet Fenrir at the training fields before the evening meal. You have some training to complete before you go. I will ensure that Fenrir is advised."

I nodded. "Yes, my lord. Thank you." And before I could say anything else, Odin disappeared.

***

I headed out to the training fields in search of Fen. I hadn’t seen him in a long while, not since his daughter Mika had tried to kill me and was banished to Hel for her crimes. The brief sighting of his profile in Odin's hall earlier today didn’t count.

The stone pathway, lined by waist-high stone walls, meandered down the hillside from the palace to a valley sectioned off for training. Valkyries, Warriors, Ulfr and horses all practiced alongside each other. A small group of mud-spattered Warriors and Valkyries passed me on the way, offering greetings and smiles as they went. My first time seen by other Asgardians after losing my wings—not as difficult as I'd expected. Thankfully, I hadn’t seen a hint of pity in any of their eyes as they passed by.

My gaze roamed the fields and I soon caught sight of the imposing figure that was Fen. He stood beside a Sleipnir, holding the reins and running his hands across its neck and back. The eight-legged horse’s pure-white hide gleamed in the sunlight.

"Hey, Fen," I called as I threw my cloak across the low stonewall. I trudged through the muddy field until I reached him. He greeted me with a wide grin, his long, black hair falling to his shoulders, curling slightly at the tips. His piercing metallic-grey eyes regarded me thoughtfully.

"Hello, Valkyrie." Fen nodded, a little smile curling at his lips.

He seemed in good spirits and though I was tempted to ask if Sigrun had spoken to him, I bit my tongue and just said, "So what are we supposed to be doing today?"

"This Sleipnir is called Ara and she will be your mount." Fen patted the horse’s neck again. "Odin wishes for you to learn to ride a Sleipnir before you leave."

"Oh, okay then," I said. "So you know about my journey?"

"Yes." I'd expected him to have an opinion, at least tell me what a bad idea it was. But he said nothing more.

"Oh…" I walked around to the other side of the animal and patted her neck. The Sleipnir was a large creature and stood too high to see Fen over her back. I admired the graceful animal in silence, hoping she would get used to my scent.

"I take it you want my opinion?" Fen asked at last.

"If you would like to give it, yes," I answered as I ran my hand along the horse’s muscular flanks.

"Very well, Brynhildr." Fen sighed, and came around Ara's head, still holding the reins. "Your journey to Yggdrasil may not be a treacherous one, but you may not like what the Norns have to say to you."

"I guess I’ll have to deal with that if it happens," I said. "I have to go. I need to know if I can do anything to change the prophecy."

"I wish you well, and I hope you get the answers you seek." Fen's voice was kind as he offered his warning. And I appreciated his concern. I did. For a moment, I didn't think he could really understand how I felt. Until I remembered his own prophecy; the one that
predicted he would be the one to slay the All-Father in the great battle of Ragnarok. I guess he did understand my predicament.

"Have you spoken to the Norns before?" I asked, watching his face.

He nodded. "If you mean in relation to my own prophecy, then yes I have sought the council of the Norns."

I didn't dare to ask anymore, and since he wasn’t offering to tell me more, I said, "Right. So when do I get to ride Ara?" I wanted to change the subject as quickly as I could.

"As soon as you are ready." Fen raised an eyebrow and met my eyes. His smile had disappeared, but I knew Fen well enough by now to know he was trying to get back to business. "And once you and Ara have bonded, she will be connected to you forever."

"Huh?" I stared at him. "Bonded?"

"Yes. If the Sleipnir allows, you will bond. It is like what Midgardians call telepathy. You will have a mental connection that will allow you to call her wherever you are and wherever she is."

"Nice." I grinned.

And from the twinkle in his eye as he handed me the reins, I suspected I was in for more than just a quick training session with Ara. Fen cupped his hands and I put my foot in it and boosted myself up onto the saddle.

A bout of dizziness took over and I sat quietly atop the horse until it passed. The saddle was soft and comfortable enough, and I held the reins comfortably within my fingers.

"Bring her into a slow walk around the field, but stay away from the walls. If she throws you, you don't want to land on blocks of stone."

I was about to tell him that Ara wouldn’t throw me when she tugged her head forward, pulled the reins from my hand, bucked, and threw me. I flew over her head and landed flat on my back in the mud, unsure if I should be grateful to the black sludge for a soft landing spot.

I got to my feet. It was a waste of time even trying to dust myself off. I scraped my muddied hands on my pants until they were semi-clean and made a beeline for Ara. She stood regally by Fen's side, head up as if she'd done nothing wrong, daring me to lose my cool. From her expression, I could have sworn she’d raised an eyebrow at me.

But I refused to play. She was just a horse anyway. I knew I could ride her if I just tried hard enough.

"Okay, Ara. Let's try this again," I said, looking at Fen for my foot up. Back on the horse, I steadied myself, got a good grip on the reigns and tugged. I landed in the mud over and over again until I was fuming inside.

All Fen did was grin.

"I think I'm wasting my time here," I said. "I'll just tell Odin that riding a Sleipnir is not for me."

"So the great Valkyrie Brynhildr is giving up so soon?" Fen smirked, his gaze on the horse, his comment purely for me.

"I'm not giving up," I snapped. "It's clear Ara and I are not suited to each other. Maybe I should get another horse and try tomorrow?"

"No, Bryn. Unfortunately, that is not an option," said Fen. "Ara is the only horse available for training right now. But let me tell you something. She is mild-mannered compared to Odin’s own Sleipnir and even compared to the horses Odin has gifted to the best of the Valkyrie Warriors. So it’s Ara or nothing."

"Maybe I choose nothing?" I asked tentatively.

"Not an option."

"Well, isn't that just fabulous," I said, my voice dry and frustrated.

"You can keep feeling sorry for yourself or you can get right back on the horse and try again," Fen said.

I stood before him, vibrating with anger and frustration. I was tired of not having a choice in things that mattered. I certainly hadn’t been given a choice when my wings were ripped from me. And even the prophecy and the trip to the Norns don’t provide me with any real choices.

And now
I was being manhandled by an eight-legged horse and I had no choice but to keep getting back into the saddle until she decided to not throw me anymore.

I sighed. "Fine, I'll get back on her, but if she kills me, it's your fault." I glared at Fen as he launched me back into Ara's saddle. I held onto the reins and managed to turn her head and walk her a few steps when lo and behold, she threw me again. But I'd made a tiny bit of progress; she had walked at least four steps before she tossed me.

Progress for sure.

"Again," said Fen as I sat in the mud grinning to myself, lost in the enjoyment of progress.

I scrambled to my feet and obeyed. Back up on Ara's back, she walked ten steps before she bucked again and tried to throw me. I held on for dear life, praying to Odin that I'd stay in the saddle. I was pretty tired of mud-baths. No such luck. She threw me again, but this time, I didn't mind climbing back up. I didn't kid myself; I'd made considerable progress. And I wasn’t about to give up.

Not yet. And certainly not while Fen stood by and watched.

And then she walked.

And she didn't throw me.

And I was overjoyed. So much so that I kept walking Ara around the field and only stopped when Fen called out that I'd soon walk the poor horse into the ground.

I left the field sore all over but a very happy girl.

***