Dating and Other Dangers (4 page)

N
ADIA
nearly fainted with relief. Ethan put his hand on her lower back, pressing her forward to follow the maitre d’. She jumped—he had to have one of those trick buzzers in his hand, because he’d just about electrocuted her. The shock made her gulp, and she was hit by a single rational thought. Should she really have agreed to this when her pulse pounded an extra thirty beats per minute the closer the guy got?

Low blood sugar meant she had no choice, right? Those pastries looked too damn good. She glanced back at the display case once more before taking her seat. The sight made her giddy and her thoughts turned crazy again. Maybe she could claim some ground in her quest to intrigue him. Didn’t guys like girls who displayed healthy appetites? Wasn’t there something seductive if you licked off all the cream or something? If she could raise his
want level, drop-kicking him later would have more impact. Hell, yes.

‘What do you feel like?’ he asked.

She hesitated, toying with some really inappropriate replies—but she figured she should stay subtle at this point to get him over the world’s worst movie trick. ‘I’m going to skip a main and go straight to dessert. Two desserts, actually, if that’s okay?’

His face lit up. ‘Sure.’

‘What about you?’ She mirrored his smile.

He rubbed his flat stomach, ‘You don’t mind if I do savoury while you do sweet?’

‘Not at all.’

Total truce. Or so she’d let it appear. At that point she spent some time studying the menu—purely to have a break from looking at him. Too much of that made her go vacant, and she wanted to stay on track.

‘They have an excellent wine selection,’ he said blandly. ‘Would you like some?’

‘Not just at the moment, but you go ahead.’ Her smaller physique meant she didn’t handle wine that well. She generally had it by the thimble, so she wasn’t going to be daft enough to have any now. She waited until the sommelier had left to get the bottle Ethan had selected without even consulting the list. ‘So how did you get us this table?’

‘I sent a message from the cinema—found out what time the film finished when you were in the little girls’ room beforehand.’

She sat back as the waiter poured Ethan’s wine, bristling at the phrase “little girl”. So he’d known he was in for bum-numbing time at the flicks. She flushed—hating being thwarted, hating feeling this hot. She needed to regain her equilibrium and act more grownup. She looked at the burgundy liquid. ‘Maybe I will have some of that too—thanks.’ One glass wouldn’t make her legless. And, frankly, she was overheated after that marathon movie and hearing Ethan mutter in French and then spinning her mind by bringing her to gastronomic paradise.

He waited while she sipped. ‘Is it okay?’

It was fabulous—smooth, incredibly drinkable and soothing. She sat back after ordering, her happiness skyrocketing at knowing divine food was coming soon.

‘Feeling better now?’ He looked sly.

‘Much, thanks.’ She sighed. He smiled, and inside so did she—no doubt he thought that if he added sugar and chocolate he’d have her as gooey as he wanted. He was
so
getting a surprise.

‘Did you have a nice night last night?’ he asked.

Last night? Oh—that’s right. She’d told him she was busy. ‘I was catching up with some friends.’

‘Yeah, you posted a lot of comments last night.’ His smile went evil. ‘You live more than half your life online.’

She took another sip of wine to bring her internal thermostat back down. ‘You’ve been snooping.’

‘It’s not snooping when you put it all out there for anyone to read.’

‘And you’ve been a bit active online yourself,’ she said, finally broaching it.

‘Ah.’ He settled more comfortably in his chair. ‘You’re mad at me for blogging about our dates?’

‘Not mad. Surprised. I didn’t think you liked the whole public angle. I thought you wanted to protect your privacy and all that.’

‘I’m not the one with contrary privacy issues,’ he said pointedly. ‘This whole thing isn’t actually about you and me, Nadia. Did you think we were going to keep it just between us? What would the point of that be?’

‘I’m still not sure what the point of any of this is.’

He chuckled. ‘Well, right now, the point is some damn good food.’

With perfect timing the waiter set the
dishes down—both her desserts at once, as she’d requested. She pounced, spooning in the sweet. Her nerves scrunched with sensation. Oh, there had to be so much butter in this, so much fine sugar, and put together with so much skill in the kitchen. Edible ecstasy.

He hadn’t touched his meal, was just watching her reaction. ‘I take it it’s nice?’

‘Nice?’
she mini-screeched. ‘What kind of a word is
nice
? This is so much better than nice. It’s …’

He waited, smile quirking.

‘It’s indescribable.’ She didn’t have to fake blatant sensual delight at the dessert. It was genuine and impossible to hide. Frankly, she couldn’t get enough of it.

Grinning, he concentrated on his own meal—some meat thing that she really had no interest in. Not when she had the
yum
stuff.

She gave up on trying to converse—not when she had this to concentrate on. She took a bite from each, alternating while panicking about which one she was going to save for the very last bite. The decision was just about impossible. And she was
not
softening towards Ethan in any way whatsoever. She was
not
feeling a ridiculous kind of favour towards him because he’d been clever enough to get
them here. She was
not
actually enjoying their conversation and the challenge he embodied.

‘What are you thinking about?’ he asked eventually. ‘You’ve gone very quiet.’

Well, she couldn’t talk when she was so busy inhaling all the cream. But now she was a little sugared up her fighting spirit revived. A divine dessert wasn’t going to soften her attitude. ‘I’m composing my write-up of this date for my blog.’

Something flickered on his face and he set down his cutlery and pushed his plate away.

‘What are
you
going to write about it?’ she asked, sweeter than her pastry. ‘I’m so looking forward to our next date where you “nail” me.’

‘I’m looking forward to that too,’ he answered, utterly unabashed.

‘My choice for the date, though, isn’t it? You wanted to go to the movies for the first.’

‘Okay, so what do you want to do?’ He conceded surprisingly quickly.

‘A day date, I think.’ Safe and out in the open, where lots of people would be around. She didn’t want to drop-kick him out of touch until the very last date, which meant she was going to have to play the first two just right.

‘A
day
date?’ Ethan sat back so the waiter could clear their plates.

‘Sunday afternoon suit you?’ Nadia asked. The sooner it was all over, the better.

‘Sure.’ He refilled their glasses. ‘I’m really looking forward to spending more time with you. You’re really good company.’

She suppressed a giggle at his not-quite-hidden sarcasm. Instead she lifted her glass and challenged him. ‘I thought you said you weren’t going to try to impress me.’

‘I guess it’s habit.’ He shrugged, but let loose that smile.

‘You always compliment?’

‘Always.’ He gazed intently at her. ‘And you don’t think that’s okay.’

‘It’s not necessarily a bad habit,’ she mused. ‘But it is if you don’t mean what you say.’

‘But I do mean it.’

‘Always?’ She put down her glass and frowned.

‘Sure.’

‘Really? Don’t you sometimes do it because you know it’ll make the other person feel good?’

‘Is that a bad thing?’

‘It is if it’s not honest.’

‘All right,’ he said softly, and leaned across the table. ‘You want honesty? Here’s some for you—I think you look fantastic in that dress. I think you look really fantastic. I don’t
want you to. It would be a lot easier if I didn’t find you attractive, but
honestly
I think you look …’

‘What?’

‘It’s
indescribable
,’ he said roughly. ‘Maybe you should feel what you do to me? Can you handle that kind of honesty?’

His hand shot out and grabbed hers, and before she could blink he’d pressed her palm to his chest. Through the cotton she could feel the heat, the fast, rhythmic pounding. Suddenly she could hear it too, thudding in her ears. Her own blood was pumping in time with his. And that wasn’t her body’s only reaction. She breathed more quickly, shallow. And worst of all was the softening—that warm, melting sensation happening in secret deep inside her. The readying for full possession by a body so much bigger and harder than hers.

She stayed frozen for five seconds too long, until awareness of their surroundings slowly returned. She was stretched across a table in a fine French restaurant, gazing into this guy’s gorgeous cinnamon-brown eyes like as if was mesmerised. She was feeling this intense, intimate
thing
…

Then she remembered her rule.

Don’t be too sexual.

And this was all about the rules. She
swallowed, battling to return to the right regime. But every movement was sexual. Everything about him was sexual.
He
was a complete magnet and he knew it. But she was going to disarm him—be the one piece he couldn’t pull.

‘Oh, you’re good,’ she said, forcing coolness into her voice, sliding her hand out from under his and bringing it back to press her fist hard against her belly beneath the table-edge. ‘You like to have the women want you, don’t you? Maybe that’s the real reason you compliment so much—it’s not their need you’re filling, it’s your own.’

‘And you’re really good at coming up with fiction.’ He sat back, looking a ton cooler than she’d sounded. ‘Whereas I prefer
facts
. And I did my research on you.’

‘And what
facts
do you think you found out?’ Her temperature soared again as anger bubbled.

‘You put it all up there yourself. It wasn’t hard to find. That very first entry on WomanBWarned.’ He leaned forward. ‘Rafe Buxton, wasn’t it?’

She avoided answering by taking another sip of her wine, her blood drumming in her ears. How dared he bring that up? That was personal.

‘What were you thinking, going with a guy called Rafe in the first place? Weren’t the alarm bells ringing then?’ he asked, refilling her glass when she set it down.

‘I’m not discussing this with you,’ she snapped. ‘You’re unable to feel any empathy. All you want to do is push your agenda.’

‘Not true,’ he said, annoyingly quietly. ‘I only want to understand where you’re coming from.’

She just glared at him.

‘So he was a “virginity collector”?’

Heat blinded her—anger, yes, but incredible embarrassment too. She’d been so stupid, and she really didn’t want to relive it. Didn’t want to discuss her pathetic sexual past with such a shark. She didn’t want him to know it at all, so she had another sip of wine. A big one.

‘So your first was a jerk?’ He shrugged. ‘You don’t have to let it colour the rest of your life.’

Oh, she couldn’t not answer that. ‘What I won’t do is let him get away with it. He preys on young women who are getting their first taste of freedom. Finding independence.’ A tutor at a university, he dazzled naïve students with his good-looks and charm and intellectual ability—or at least that façade. Once
she’d found out the truth she’d seen that those things were cultivated, not innate or truly deep.

‘But we all have to make mistakes. That’s part of being human.’

‘No,’ she disagreed. ‘There’s a difference between making a mistake and being abused.’ And Rafe
had
abused her—and several other young women. ‘Illusions shouldn’t be shattered like that.’

‘But everybody has to face reality some time.’

‘You think
that’s
reality?’ She was appalled. ‘So there’s no such thing as a committed, loving relationship?’

‘Happy ever after?’ Ethan shook his head. ‘No.’

His cynicism hurt, even though it shouldn’t have surprised her. But she could acknowledge a portion of truth in his words regarding that painful episode.

‘Maybe not at that age,’ she conceded. It had been her second year of university. She’d come from a small northern town and she’d been sheltered. Cosseted, really, by over-protective parents and brothers. As a result she’d been gullible and so easily dazzled. ‘I wasn’t looking for marriage. But there could have been some kindness and some fun. Not just
being another number on his list.’ Not being anything but an object. It had been a complete game for him. And once he’d had what he wanted—her virginity—he’d gone on to the next. Another virgin. In the very same week.

Megan.

Only neither of them had known about the other. About all the others.

‘You wanted some respect?’

‘And honesty.’ He’d played them both together. And others. And once they’d found out, by talking at night at a party one night, their friendship had been forged. It was the one truly positive thing to have emerged from an otherwise crushing, humiliating situation. And it had led to WomanBWarned.

‘You’re really into honesty, huh?’ Ethan’s brown eyes burned darker.

‘There can be nothing without honesty.’ Certainly not trust. And without trust or honesty or respect there was nothing to support any kind of a relationship.

‘But
you’re
not honest.’ With careful deliberation he struck at her integrity.

‘Yes, I am.’

‘No.’ He shook his head, a wry smile softening the accusation. ‘You’re not. You hide behind your website. Behind your stature. All wide eyes—like you’re this little thing who
has no control over the situations you find yourself in.’

Stunned, she stared at him—he was wrong. ‘That’s not true.’ She hated how people perceived her as weak because she was little. She certainly didn’t think she was weak herself. She spent her life proving she wasn’t. ‘I was tricked,’ she said. ‘But I admit my own responsibility, my own stupidity.’

‘So you won’t ever be that stupid again. And you’re out to prove it with your website.’

Nadia swallowed more wine to hide the mess of emotion inside her. He made it sound so simple. But there was much more to it. It went so much deeper. She stared down at the stem of her glass and breathed in. The oxygen hit, enhancing the flavour of the wine.