Dating A Saint (23 page)

“Uh—let me think about it for a moment,” Jim said, holding the vibrating, heavy breathing, ready-to-strip-him woman in his arms. “I had no idea my clothes were going to net me this sort of reception. I would have bought them years ago.”

She pulled his shirt out of the waistband. “I like them. They make you look like a guy who wants to get laid,” Lauren told him.

“
Get laid
?” Jim said, choking out the words on a sharp laugh. “Have you been talking with Casey?”

“Alexa’s assistant—Sydney,” Lauren said, unbuckling Jim’s belt and sliding it through the loops. “He said I should just throw you to the floor and do my worst.”

Jim had a moment of panic when the belt hit the floor, but it wasn’t like his pants were going to fall down. They were far too tight for that to happen.

“Do you always heed Sydney’s advice?” Jim asked, hissing when her hands crept under his shirt and across his chest. Had she ever touched him so aggressively before? Why did it feel so familiar, so absolutely right?

“I only take advice when I agree with it this much,” Lauren said softly. “I don’t want to wait anymore, but I will if you think we need to. I’ll take a cold shower and drink a couple glasses of wine to calm the urge I have to rip off your clothes. It’s just you look so—”

“What?” Jim asked, when she trailed off.

“Like you could really be mine,” Lauren said cautiously. “I know you bought those clothes for me, and I—are you going to make me wait?”

“No,” Jim said, pulling away slightly and taking her hand. He’d promised himself he was going to meet her needs. “I’m not going to make you wait. I’m not going to make myself crazy either. God knows you’re all I want. Can we make it to your bed?”

“Yes,” Lauren said laughing. “I’m not in
that
big of a hurry.”

“I think I am,” Jim said, tugging her to the stairs, noticing her breasts were loose under the tank top she wore. “Tell me you wear a bra when I’m not around.”

“Most of the time,” Lauren assured him. “I took it off just before you got here.”

“Good to know,” Jim said, stopping halfway up the stairs. “Kiss me again. I can’t wait until we get to the top.”

She leaned down from two steps ahead of him. He caught her mouth, then grabbed her hips. “Hook your legs around my waist,” he ordered.

“I’m too heavy to carry up the stairs,” Lauren protested.

“Do it now, Lauren.” Jim insisted, pulling one leg around his waist as he backed her against the wall.

Lauren felt him absorb her weight with a groan and pull her against him. She felt the ridge of his jeans through the yoga pants she wore. “I’m too heavy. I’m a size fourteen.”

“I’ve dreamed of this for two weeks. I’ve been working out extra just to be able to carry you.” He put a hand on the handrail and started up with his other hand cupping her bottom, every step effectively rubbing them together.

“Remind me to thank Kaiser for the weights. And I love your hips.”

“What?” she said, her mind already losing focus as the pleasure built.

Jim looked at her flushed face, swollen mouth, and radiant face. “How the hell have I stayed out of you so long?”

Lauren seemed to be beyond talking rationally, so Jim let his sense of smell guide him to the room he was sure was the master because it smelled like her. A king bed dominated the floor. The white covers were tidy and tucked in completely.

“No time to pull down the covers,” he said on a laugh. “I hope you don’t get cold.”

He fell with her on the bed then, pushing down on top of her with his weight and stealing her breath. Then he moved hard against her heat as she struggled to reach between them and unsnap his pants.

“Too fast,” he murmured against her mouth.

“Next time we’ll go slow,” she told him, finally getting the snap undone. Her hand reached inside and found him hard and ready. She stroked him from base to end. “Jim. I meant what I told my mother.”

“
Lauren
.” He said her name hoarsely as she stroked him. It came out sounding like a distress call.

He jerked the tank top off over her head, his mouth burning a path across her breasts, before he made himself stop. If he lingered too long, he would be lost.

Jim wrenched away to push the tight yoga pants down her long legs, unveiling heaven.

“Don’t move,” he ordered harshly.

Jim stood, shucked his jeans and underwear, and then reached back on the bed to yank the yoga pants off her ankles. He was puzzled when she laughed and didn’t even try to help.

When he crawled naked over her naked body at last, Lauren did nothing more than meet his gaze levelly. He used his knees to separate her thighs, and she let him do that too without saying a word. Her gaze never wavered from his, making Jim both wary and determined not to be stopped by anything she did or said.

“You’re awfully compliant all of a sudden,” Jim commented, watching the amusement flicker in her gaze.

“I’m holding my breath. I’m also afraid you’ll stop if I do anything,” Lauren confessed.

He shook his head and smiled wickedly.

“Not going to happen,” Jim said firmly, easing down and letting his erection nudge her wet entrance. “But I’m not going to rush either. I want to watch your face as I make you mine.”

He slid slowly in until he met resistance, then withdrew slightly before sliding just that far again. “The reality of you exceeds all my dreams,” Jim said softly.

Her eyes glazed over with pleasure, and started to close. What Jim was doing didn’t exceed her dreams. It fulfilled every one of them, and was even better than she remembered.

“No. Open your eyes,” Jim demanded. “Watch me, Lauren. I want you to know—to be completely sure—you are the only woman I want to share myself with for the rest of my life.”

“Jim,” she said, arching up when he finally pushed in the hilt, his weight bearing down hard as he buried himself completely inside her. Their joining was perfect. It was what a first time was supposed to be like.

If only today could have been their first time, Lauren thought sadly. If only she had stopped him or could forget what had come before.

“I love you, lady. Do you believe me?” he asked, stroking in and out.

“Yes,” Lauren told him breathlessly as he started to move more strongly. “I love you, too.” Why not tell him? It was nothing less than the truth.

“Is this good for you?” he asked, his voice husky with the effort to hold back.

Lauren raised her hips, raising Jim up in the process. Jim laughed as he braced himself with one knee.

“Do you think you can—oh yes, that’s what I wanted,” she said, letting his movements push her into the bed.

He laughed at her directions, stroking inside her as she groaned beneath him. “Good to know you approve,” he told her, his voice filled with amusement, his body tensing with joy to be in her.

“Now harder,” she ordered, twisting herself against him, clutching him both inside and out.

Jim laughed against her shoulder, and pushed her up the bed with the next stroke. Her groan of approval vibrated through him. It was all he could do not to let it all go.

“Yes, that’s it,” Lauren praised, her hands pulling at his back and her legs wrapping around his. “Harder and faster, please—Jim.”

“Don’t let me hurt you,” Jim said softly.

“You’re not going to hurt me,” Lauren informed him, her body keeping pace with his rhythm.

He fastened his mouth to hers, stroked his tongue against hers, keeping rhythm with everything else. He released her when she raised her hips to his again.

“Fine,” Jim said roughly, when he turned her mouth loose. “I was trying to be sweet to you the first time.”

When she only laughed, Jim dug his fingers into her backside, grabbing handfuls of her hips to brace her for the punishing rhythm she was begging him for. The smell of her perfume grew stronger and both of them were sweating within a couple of minutes of that madness.

Sanity slipped a notch, and Jim swore at its loss, unsure how much longer he was going to last. Then suddenly he felt Lauren’s body tense and spasm violently in release beneath his.

He heard her calling his name, reminding him of the night he’d undressed her. She was his then, and even more his now. Lauren was his. It had been that simple since the first time he’d touched her.

His possessive thoughts snapped the leash he’d been holding on his desire to stake a claim to this woman. It was as if his body was trying to release years of frustration with every stroke.

“Mine,” Jim told her harshly. “I don’t give a damn how un-liberated it sounds.”

Finally, Lauren’s body was unmoving beneath his, and she’d stopped asking him for anything. Satisfied with her physical surrender, Jim emptied himself thoroughly inside Lauren’s lovely heat at last, enjoying every second of his own climax, until finally coming to rest on top of her. He was very glad Lauren’s body was a big enough size to support a man as large as he was because he literally couldn’t move off of her when he was done.

“Are you sure I didn’t hurt you?” Jim asked, whispering the question in Lauren’s ear.

Her only reply was another snort before she adeptly rolled him to his back without disconnecting them. His question reminded her of a similar one he asked after he’d been with her the first time. She raised her upper body and crossed her arms over his chest, leaning her ample breasts over her arms.

“No,” she said, smiling down into his face. “You didn’t hurt me. I don’t even feel branded or marked. I guess you’ll just have to try harder next time.”

Jim found the view amazing, even when he couldn’t fathom how he ended up on the bottom.

“Is there some reason I’m not getting the sweet version of you in bed, Lauren?”

Stung by her teasing comment, Jim reached up and cupped the back of her head to pull her down to him for a punishing kiss, but saw something in her gaze that stopped him. He ended up stroking her hair instead.

Lauren closed her eyes and rubbed against Jim’s hand. “Maybe things will be different when some of my pent-up frustration is gone.”

Jim considered her statement, wondering what more he was supposed to do. “If what we just did wasn’t enough to fix your frustration, what else do you want me to do?” he asked.

“Be with me without worrying about it, without feeling guilty,” she said succinctly. “I’ve waited a long time for you Jim—I want it all, no holding back.”

“Holding back?” Jim said surprised, ego stung and hurt by that comment. “Lady, I did everything you ordered me to do to the best of my damn ability. How can you accuse me of holding myself back?”

“Aren’t you?” Lauren demanded. “Aren’t you even now wondering if this is okay? If you should feel guilty or not?”

Jim flipped them back over, not breaking their connection either, and glared back down into her face. “Maybe I would have been before this week, but I am damn well not holding back anymore. I love you, Lauren. What the hell is going on here? If I hurt you in some way, tell me about it.”

Lauren lifted her chin. “Not even on your best day could you ever hurt me, Gallagher. Every Thursday bigger men than you throw me to floor over and over. I
always
get back up.”

“I can’t believe you’d bring up other men while I’m inside you. Why, Lauren?” he asked. “Why are you so mad at me?”

Lauren said nothing, just lifted her chin further.

Jim rolled off and out of her, and to his feet in one smooth movement. “Your pillow talk needs a lot of improvement,” he said bitterly.

Then to keep from yelling further, from saying things he knew he would regret, Jim stalked off to the bathroom, slamming the door between them.

Lauren lay there staring at the ceiling after he’d gone, chastising herself for being such a bitch to him. She had said those things to hurt him on purpose, even though she had known Jim thought it was his first time with her. She had let today happen without telling him any differently, then blamed him because she was still mad and upset about two weeks ago. It wasn’t Jim’s fault she was an emotional coward.

Jim probably wanted to leave now, put some distance between them, and Lauren couldn’t blame him. She owed him an apology and an explanation, and then after—she would let him go. No matter how he reacted, she had to at least tell him the truth about their first time.

The rest—well, if she turned out to be pregnant she would just have to deal with it later. She could only handle one emotional crisis at the moment. Jim hadn’t asked any questions about birth control today, and she hadn’t volunteered any information. She’d have to repeat the test in a few weeks again because of today.

What an awful woman she was turning into, Lauren decided, throwing an arm across burning eyes.

When the coldness in the room raised chill bumps on her naked body, Lauren removed the arm from her face and reached to the top of the bed to drag a blanket down around her. She wrapped it around her body, trying to think of what she was going to say when Jim came out of the bathroom.

Lauren admitted to herself that she had panicked when Jim had slid inside her so deliberately, inch by delicious inch. She had gotten everything she wanted from Jim, but hadn’t been able to enjoy it. So instead, she’d taken his lovemaking and reduced what they had to just mutually accommodating sex.

She accused Jim of holding back, when she had been doing the same thing herself. She had made love to him with her body, but had refused him access to her heart.

*** *** ***

When Jim came out of the bathroom, Lauren was wrapped in a white blanket and sitting on the bed. He walked over to pick up his clothes from the floor, and started to get dressed. When she sniffled, Jim swore and dropped his jeans. He couldn’t leave Lauren crying over what had happened between them.

Still naked, Jim walked over to the bed. “You sharing or letting me freeze?”

She opened one corner of her large cover, and pulled the bulk of it from beneath her to make a spot for him. Jim climbed in beside her, appreciating her warmth, and took his time wrapping the cover back snugly around both of them. Thank goodness for king size, he thought, smiling.

His time in the bathroom had been the cool down he’d needed to start thinking clearly again. He didn’t know what he’d done to upset her so much, but Lauren wasn’t the kind of person to strike out without provocation.