Dating a Metro Man (23 page)

“Stop that this instant,” Talia pleaded, closing her eyes against the desire in his. “The office floor is sounding better and better. Can we still do Chinese food tomorrow night? My treat. You bought pizza the other day.”

“Deal. I’ll be home after seven. Lunch sounds good now. I know a couple of places nearby. One is a Greek deli. The other is a bistro with organic food,” Allen said, taking her hand in his again. The feeling of tugging her along with him was both pleasurable and frustrating.

“I could go for a pita. I haven’t had good lamb in a long time,” Talia said, trying to make any sort of conversation to get her mind off her hand tingling in Allen’s.

When the elevator door closed behind them, Allen looked up at the camera and judged the angles at which it was capturing images. He tugged and then pushed Talia into a far corner.

“I needed to get you out of camera range,” he told her.

“Why?” she asked. Her question was answered thoroughly by the invasion of his tongue in her mouth. Allen lifted her until her toes barely touched the floor of the elevator. His hands gripped and held her tightly.

“Tomorrow night, I’m going to hold you against the wall of my bedroom and show you just how strong I really am,” Allen promised.

“Show me now. Press the emergency button on the elevator and you can hang my jacket over the camera,” Talia said, trying to stifle her giggles.

“No. I can wait one more damn day, and so can you. I like spicy beef and steamed rice. Skip the egg roll. Don’t forget the fortune cookies. I’ll make green tea for us. I have my own condoms. Don’t wear too many clothes,” Allen ordered.

“Sir, yes, sir. You just love to give orders, don’t you? Were you in the military?” she asked, blinking as he pulled her from the corner to exit the elevator.

“Army,” Allen answered. “I was a military policeman.”

“I can really see you doing that,” Talia said.

“Well, I’m a clothing designer now. Or at least, I’m trying to be,” Allen said, watching her eyes as her face crinkled into a smile.

“Yes, that makes sense too. I don’t know why I didn’t figure out who you were when you were so closely inspecting the wrap I use to carry Kendra. I let my physical attraction to you cloud my normal ability to size up a person,” Talia said as she strolled along with her hand in his. “Though you seem quite full of surprises. You’re a lot more complex than you appear at first glance. Your physique is quite distracting.”

“I hope that was a compliment,” Allen said, rubbing his face and holding the restaurant door for her.

She rattled off a string of French that included a crude, sexy suggestion about using other impressive muscles she assumed he had. He answered her with a French oath and a hard kiss just inside the restaurant door. The man behind the deli counter stopped to stare at them.

When they stepped up to the counter, the man spoke to them in flawless French to take their order.

Talia blushed when she realized the deli worker had heard and understood everything suggestive she had just said to Allen.

Allen spoke back to the man in French, explaining they had been fighting about his neglect of her. The man said something insulting to Allen, who just bared his teeth in a wicked smile. He didn’t bother answering the insult, just stared at the man until he turned his gaze away. Eventually, Allen told the man he was intending to make it up to Talia as soon as he got the chance.

The man looked interestedly at Talia as he served their pitas to them. He told Talia to come back if Allen failed to please her.

Talia assured the man that she had no doubt Allen would please her as he had already done so earlier in the week.

“The other night was just a preview,” Allen said to her in English, as they found a table in a mostly empty restaurant. They had missed the lunch rush and seemed to have the place to themselves.

“Stop flirting with me, or I will not get a bite of this food down. I’m starved,” Talia hissed, her eyes darkening with irritation. Allen’s breath caught. It was the same look of impatience she’d given him when she thought he’d been a mover. Allen wanted so badly to see it under other circumstances that he was just further convinced he was a goner. He must have fallen for her the first moment he saw her.

“I hope this gets better after tomorrow. Everything you say and do tortures me too,” Allen complained, taking a big bite of his pita. “I will never make fun of another guy in this condition again.”

Talia laughed, sighed at what was simmering between them, and dug into her food.

*** *** ***

Late that afternoon, Regina was sitting in her office jotting down the notes for her last session when her office manager knocked on her door.

“You have time for a visitor?” Ann asked. “Jenna Ranger is asking to see you.”

“Sure. Send her back,” Regina said, not letting herself wonder about why Jenna had sought her out. Regina knew the why. She was just busy trying to think about how to explain to Jenna that she couldn’t talk about Seth with her.

“Hey,” Jenna said, coming in with dusty work clothes and work boots still on. “Sorry I’m a mess. I came straight here from work. I didn’t know who else to talk with about this.”

Regina motioned a hand to the chair in front of your desk.

“I’m not here to talk about Seth,” Jenna announced. “I already know he came to see you. He told me he had gone to therapy. He didn’t say you were his doctor specifically, but I guessed that much. Still, I didn’t come about that. I came to ask you some questions because I know you will answer me honestly whether I want to hear it or not.”

Regina raised an eyebrow. “Well, all I can do is say I will try.”

Jenna took a deep breath. “Am I an awful, selfish person, Regina? I mean, I can see that I’m spoiled in some ways, but am I truly selfish?”

Regina’s eyes widened. “That’s a strange question, honey. Why would you think you’re an awful person?”

“Because I can’t seem to stop myself from treating Seth badly. It’s like no matter how nice he is to me, I still tense up and want to protect myself whenever I see him. He’s commented a couple of times about how unappreciative I am of his efforts to be nice. I think he’s right, Regina. Something is either wrong with me or I’m as bad as he keeps saying I am. I don’t want to be that way. I figured if anyone would tell me the truth about myself—you would,” Jenna finished, studying her hands.

“Jenna,” Regina began. “Those things you mention are subjective. One person could view you as selfish and spoiled. Another person could view you as kind and selfless. We view others through the filter of our expectations and experiences of them.”

“I don’t want to be the kind of person who would hurt someone who’s only being good to them,” Jenna said, frowning.

“You were kind in giving Casey your approval when you didn’t really want your mother to date him. Then you were selfless in standing by your mother, Casey, and even Seth when Casey was in that accident. We’re all just human, honey. We develop character by the actions we take—what we do to serve ourselves and others,” Regina said, studying Jenna’s pensive expression. “Do good. That will be reflected in how you feel about yourself and how others feel about you.”

“Mama and Daddy are both good. Aren’t they?” she asked.

“Yes,” Regina said firmly. “They are both amazing people—for the love they gave each other and what they have given to others since. You were unconditionally loved by two of the best people I’ve ever met. You have that in you as well.”

“I don’t know if I do, Regina. Every time I see Seth, I immediately say something ugly to him. It’s like I can’t help myself,” Jenna said, hating to admit it, but knowing her confession was as sacred to Regina as it would have been with any priest.

“Jenna, have you forgiven Seth for hurting you before?” Regina asked.

Jenna looked at her hands. Her nails were deplorable. Her mother would have a fit if she saw how awful they looked. And she hadn’t shaved her legs in a week or gotten a pedicure in a couple of months. Lately, a shower seemed like a luxury.

Pulling her attention back to Regina, she felt burning tears threatening. If she couldn’t bring herself to shave her legs for him regularly, how in the hell was she going to forgive Seth? Even the idea scared the hell out of her.

“What will I do if he hurts me again?” she said quietly. “I never completely got over him before. It would be worse now. We’ve been seeing each other—dating again—and—well more. We haven’t told anyone.”

“Well, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but the people you love will definitely hurt you again at some point. Sometimes it’s nothing but aggravating habits. It might even be another big thing you find out about. Emotional risk is just part of being in love with someone,” Regina said softly.

“I am in love with him,” Jenna admitted, tears making muddy tracks in her dusty face. “Even if I don’t want to be.”

Regina passed her a tissue box. “You’ve been in love with Seth Carter since you met him. I know what I told you before, and I would still stand by that if you tell me he’s treating you the same.”

Jenna was already shaking her head from side to side. “No. Seth has been great to me this time around. I mean, he’s still busy as hell and tends to stay connected to his electronics 24/7. But he tossed his ringing cell phone in the floor once to be with me. And he tries to limit his calls to when I’m not there. He’s either more complex than I noticed before, or he really has changed. I can’t tell which.”

“We can all turn into technosexuals sometimes. You looked pretty occupied by your cell phone the day of Lauren’s wedding,” Regina commented, grinning when Jenna laughed.

“I was sexting with Seth—not sending pictures, but sending sexy text messages,” Jenna confessed. “Don’t tell Lauren. I wouldn’t want her to know. When I left, it was to sneak off with Seth, not to take a business call. We had only been together a few times at that point. You know how it is when you’re new to each other.”

“Indeed I do. Ben and I text each other like that all the time. Of course, we were doing it before it went mainstream. It was just that we missed each other so badly when we couldn’t be together as much as we wanted,” Regina said, smiling. “My attachment to Ben was pretty intense once he got me in bed.”

“Has Ben ever done anything you’ve been really mad at him for?” Jenna asked.

“Yes. He gave up his job in his company as CEO,” Regina said, her mouth tightening in a line. “I know Ben is happy in his new work, but knowing he sacrificed a lifetime of achieving for me still hurts. But that’s about me more than him.”

“What do you mean?” Jenna asked, finally stemming the flow. “I mean it’s good that Ben loved you that much, isn’t it?”

“My being upset is not about what Ben did. He’s a grown man and has a right to make his own decisions about his life and his work. It’s about the fact that to this day I still feel unworthy of that level of sacrifice. He should never have had to give up a top level job he’d sweated and sacrificed for just to be with me and make my life better. I can’t get over it because I haven’t healed how I feel about myself. No one ever loved me like that before Ben, so I have a hard time believing he could. The net result is that it turns into anger at him, even though I know that’s wrong. Therapists have issues like everybody else,” Regina said easily.

“I’m not my mother, no matter how much I look like her. I get absorbed in my work and I have never cared much about looking like the perfect woman. Part of me still feels like I’m not interesting enough to hold Seth’s attention for the long haul. I keep thinking he’ll go back to not paying attention like he did before. He’s enamored of me now, but I wonder what will happen when the lust wears off. I hear it does eventually,” Jenna said, sniffing.

“Well, it changes,” Regina corrected. “I hope like hell it never wears off. Ben Kaiser is like a drug I’m addicted to, and I need my fix to feel like life is worth living.”

“I feel exactly the same way about Seth,” Jenna said. “I guess it’s the same no matter how old you are or how smart. When Mama went to the hospital to make up with Casey, I asked her if she was afraid of getting hurt by him again. She said yes she was, but that she was more afraid of trying to live without him. She said being with Casey was worth any emotional risk.”

“Your mother is a very smart woman,” Regina said. “And so are you. You’re the only one who can decide if Seth Carter is worth the risk for you.”

Jenna nodded. “Well, thanks for talking to me. I’ve been feeling like shit all day and just needed to talk to someone. Now I’m going home to clean up so I can go get my fix from him,” Jenna told her. “It’s been a few days now and I’m climbing the walls.”

Regina laughed as Jenna walked out the door. She got out her cell phone and typed, which was never easy for her on the tiny keyboard the size of a credit card. Five minutes later she finally pressed send.

Feeling extremely grateful for you today. You can have anything you want tonight.

The phone buzzed a short time later. She laughed as she read Ben’s reply.

Teach me something new.

“Something new,” Regina said to the walls of her office as she pondered the possibilities.

She stood and walked to an early book she had published when she was in her late thirties. It had been hard as hell to get through all that sex advice then without a partner to practice on. Well, she had one now. She could only hope Ben’s heart was up to the challenge.

She sat down and typed again.

What do ice cubes, hot fudge, and my mouth have in common? Only Ben Kaiser gets to find out.

The phone buzzed back at her within seconds.

I’ll bring the fudge sauce, but I get to go first. I’m feeling pretty appreciative myself. Love you.

Regina set her phone down on the desk and sighed again for how lucky she was.

Allen ran his roommate off Friday evening and told him to spend the night at his girlfriend’s house. He had plans for once, and they included using the whole apartment. The woman coming to see him deserved to eat at the dining table and not in his room. He lit a couple of candles on the table and turned on some smooth jazz music, trying to calm himself as he waited.