Dart and Dash (16 page)

Chapter 31 – Garnet

Daisy told me she wanted to be alone. I hugged her and watched her leave with the box from Dart’s room. She didn’t even want to eat with us.

I did worry when she shut our front door, but I knew she needed to work through it on her own. She was strong, and I could see it.

When I shut Dash’s front door, I laid my head on the cool wood. Exhaustion was starting to take its toll on me. I had been running between two houses, sick with worry, and was barely eating myself. Not to mention, I was trying to stay current with my classes.

“I left a message with Coach. Are you all right?” Dash had walked up behind me.

“Yep,” I turned, putting on the smile. “Do you want to eat?”

He nodded, and we went to the dining room. I had ordered pizza because it was quick and easy. I set out a bottle of water for each of us. I knew I was huge hypocrite because I threw away all the alcohol. But I didn’t want to see Dash would ruin his life.

When my mom died, my crutch was drinking. I was rebelling and being reckless. Dash and Daisy were different than I was. Dash was still holding a small open wound from his parents’ death. Dart’s death had made that even worse for him. Dart had been his rock. He’d kept Dash sane and didn’t let him go over the edge. Without him here, I knew Dash would lose it, and he had.

I watched him as he inhaled three pieces of pizza. I was happy to see him eat. I was even more ecstatic that he had showered. Before she left, Daisy had suggested he call the coach.

“Do you think you’re off the team?” I hated to ask the question that was hanging in the air, but I knew he was thinking it, too.

“I don’t know. I mean I’ve missed two games, all those practices, plus I haven’t worked out since Dart,” he stopped, dropping the pizza back onto the plate.

“I’m sure that it will work out.” I squeezed his hand. “Marshall isn’t going to kick off their best wide receiver.”

He took my hand and studied it. Dash traced his fingers along the inside of my palm. I didn’t know what he was searching for, but he continued the motion for a full minute.

“Garnet…I…” I could hear all the emotions in his voice.

“I know,” he didn’t have to say thank you to me. I knew he was hurting and hadn’t meant any of it. He lost his brother, his best friend.

“Thank you.”

“Always.”

“Will you stay with me tonight?” I could hear the hope in his voice.

I nodded. “Let me just go and check on Daisy.” I gave him a quick kiss and jogged across the street.

I didn’t see Daisy on the first floor, so I went up to her room. I gently knocked on her door. When there was no answer, I slowly opened it. Daisy was asleep on her bed. Her soft snores brought me some relief. I never thought Daisy would ever hurt herself, but one could never be sure when it came to the loss of a soulmate.

I pulled the blanket up around her neck, when I noticed something under her head. It was her cell phone, and it was blinking. I removed it from her pillow and the display read, ‘My Dart’.

I hit the green dial and Dart’s voice mail picked up.

Hey, this is Dart. You can’t reach me because I am with the love of my life, Daisy. Leave a message.

It was a strange feeling hearing his voice. Almost like a ghost was in the room. I looked down at Daisy and even in her sleep, I could see the pain on her face. I laid the phone back by her head and went back over to Dash’s house.

Dash was standing at the top of the stairs looking into Dart’s room. I wasn’t going to startle him, so I walked up the stairs gingerly.

“You know, when we first moved in here Daisy was trying like hell to decorate.” Dash was still staring into the room. “Of course, I was like hell no, but Dart let her decorate his room. Hard to believe we have been in this house for two years.”

When I reached the top of the stairs, I looked into the room. It was so bare. We had taken out the smashed dresser and desk, making the left side of the room empty.

“Coach called,” his sad eyes turned to me. “He wants to see me tomorrow at his house.”

I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not. I rubbed my hand up and down his back, showing him that I was listening.

“Will you go with me?”

“Of course. Why don’t we get some rest?” I guided him to his bedroom. “I see you changed the sheets.” I teased him.

“Yeah, I think I need to clean the room sometime soon.” He gave me a small smirk. It made my heart skip seeing a touch of the old Dash gleaming through his sadness.

“I’ll let it slide this time,” I continued to joke with him.

We crawled into bed, and instantly I curled up into him. His woodsy smell brought comfort to me. I had missed this part of him. Dash clicked the light off; there was a dim glow from the streetlights outside.

Dash’s fingers softly rubbed up and down my arm. My stomach flipped at his tender touch. This was the Dash that I loved.

Loved?

Did I love Dash?

Yes, I truly did.

I stared at his face. For the first time since Dart’s death, he looked relaxed. This wasn’t something that I could say to him right now. He’d had enough to deal with, and I couldn’t bring any more stress to him.
 

Chapter 32 – Dash

I sat at the large glass top kitchen table across from my head coach. He was an older man, with salt and pepper gray hair. I watched him twist his cup around his hands pondering the question that I just asked. Garnet was next to me, looking at him, too.

“Dash, you know I don’t beat around the bush, so let me tell you how it is.” He leaned in closer to me. “You’re not off the team, but I do have a big concern.”

“What?” My heart raced wondering what it was.

“You’ve missed a lot of classes. Now, I know the professors will work with you, but I’m worried about your eligibility.”

I fell back in my seat. This was getting worse.

“Dash, I don’t know what to say about the loss of Dart. You know I’m truly sorry about that, but,” he paused for a second. “There will be two NFL scouts at Saturday’s game, and they’re there to see you. As much as I want you to play, I won’t let you if you’re not caught up in your classes.”

I didn’t know what to say. I had missed a lot of lectures, and I knew there was going to be a lot of homework to catch up on. This was going to be tough.

“You have until Friday to get caught up, and you can’t miss any more practices.”

I took a deep breath and remembered Dart’s words to me:
I’m proud of you.

“I can do it.” My voice was firm and full of confidence. “I know I can get caught up by Friday.”

“Then I’ll see you at practice in the morning.”

Garnet and I drove back to my place. Daisy let us use her car, because I still couldn’t get into Dart’s car, and my bike was totaled in the accident. We sat in her driveway for a moment, listening to the sounds of the traffic around us.

“You can do this, Dash. It’ll be a rough week, but I’ll help you in any way that I can.”

I rubbed my hands against the slight scruff on my face. “I need to get organized.”

“Well, let’s do that.” She hopped out of the car.

We jogged across the street to my house. I gathered all my books, papers, and folders that were scattered all over the house. We relocated to the dining room, and we began to separate the stuff.

It was almost twenty minutes before we finally reached the bottom of the pile. Dart had always been the most organized of us. Even though I knew where stuff was, I never put it back in its right place. I was the same way with my schoolwork. I knew what I had to do; I just needed to be more organized.

“You weren’t lying when you said you needed to do this.” Garnet stared at the five piles in front of us.

“Dart was better at this stuff than I ever was.”

“Well, let’s get started.” Garnet picked up the pile closest to her, and began looking at the syllabus.

“I brought the pizza.” Daisy shouted, coming through the front door.

“What are you doing here?” I asked as she sat two boxes down on the other end of the table.

“Garnet texted me and told me a little bit about what was going on. Are there really going to be scouts at the game?”

“According to Coach, yes.”

“Well, Dart,” she paused composing her thoughts. “He always told me how great it would be to see you in the NFL, and I know he wouldn’t let you fail. Dart would have been there for Garnet if something had happened to me, so,” a tear escaped her and rolled down her cheek. “I’ll be here for you.”

“Thank you, Daisy.” I meant it, and she was right. Dart would have done anything for Garnet.

“But, let me tell you something,” she pointed her finger right into my face. “We’ll not miss another Sunday together. Next week, we’re back at it.”

I gave her a small smirk. “You have my word.”

“Good,” she snapped back. “Now where do we begin?”

We went in.

After five hours, two pizzas, and a twelve pack of Pepsi, we had made a small dent in the work that was waiting for me. The girls actually didn’t do work for me, even though I might have asked. However, they did skim over some of the reading, and that helped me out.

“I need a break.” I threw the pen down and finished off my pop.

“I’m going to run over to my house and finish my work up. If you need any more help, just text me.” Daisy said, got up from the table, and left.

I went into the living room and lay down on the couch. This was going to be a long week, and I had to do it. Not only for me, but for my brother too. We had always known that Dart wasn’t going into the NFL, but he’d always known that I wanted to.

I put my arm over my eyes, thinking about Dart and me as kids. We were twelve, and lying in Dart’s bed, like we always did. My head was at the footboard and his at the headboard. We had an assignment in school that week about where we wanted to be when we were forty. At that time, forty was old, but I knew one thing, I was going to be in the NFL. I was going to have six motorcycles, and a Lamborghini to drive to the games. I even wrote about my mansion on the hill. In my paper, it was all about possessions and my future career.

Dart was different. His was about having a family, taking his future children to watch my NFL games, and being married to his soul mate. He was strange to think of a crazy thing at that age.

I had laughed at him when he told me his, but when I told him mine, he nodded. He told me he knew that I’d make it. That was my twin brother, always my number one fan. Right by my side, no matter what I did, or how fucked up I was.

“Dash,” Garnet softly touched my chest. “You okay?”

I removed my arm from my face. “Yep,” I choked out.

Her tiny hands wiped the tears from my eyes. I didn’t even realize that I’d been crying.

“Lay with me.” It wasn’t a question; it was more like a request.

Garnet’s plump lips gave me a small smile, and she curled into my side. The smell of cherries and honey calmed my rattled nerves.

“I can do this, right?” Even though I’d had confidence before, I heard all of my fears in my voice now.

Garnet rose up onto her elbow. “The Dash Terrance I know doesn’t doubt himself. You’re going to grab this football by the laces and run it in for a touchdown.”

“Well,” I chuckled. “I don’t quite catch it by the laces, but thank you for the vote of assurance.” I kissed her for head.

“Dash, stop worrying. It’s going to be fine. You can do it. I know that you can.” She gave me a soft kiss on my lips. I felt a small stir in my pants.

Garnet started to pull away, but I held her close. I pressed my lips harder against hers. She moaned when I drove my tongue inside of her mouth. I gripped her leg, pulling it over my hip.

Garnet was in a long black cotton skirt. I tugged it all the way up to her hips, and pushed her down on me, letting her feel how hard I was for her.

“Dash,” she panted, rocking her hips. “We need a condom.” She started to move, but I stopped her.

“I have one.” I rose up, reached for my back pocket, pulling out my wallet, and found a condom that I kept in there.

After I rolled it on, I moved Garnet’s thong out of the way, and she sank down on me. She rocked harder against me, and her tightness held me in place inside of her. The music in the living room was our grunting, panting, and the squeaky springs of the couch.

“Dash,” she said my name over and over.

“Fuck,” was the only word I said, as I pumped hard into her. I knew that we both were getting close.

The tension in my body was building. The hurt, the sadness, the feelings of abandonment were fading, as the love for Garnet grew. She was the wind that blew away my fog of depression. It was her love that was saving me.

“Don’t stop, Dash, please,” she begged, arching her back.

I continued to drive into her faster and felt myself explode around her. I kept going until a few seconds later, I could feel her wetness on my thighs.

“I needed that.” I said, as she collapsed on my chest. I kissed the top of her head.

“Me too.” She was still panting. “It’s the first time I’ve had sex with all my clothes on.”

I chuckled. I didn’t respond. That was the past, and Garnet was my future. My heart swelled with love thinking of my life with her.

Dart was gone, but Garnet remained. She hadn’t left my side. Why? Most girls would have run away, if they had seen me in this condition.

“I’ll clean up in the downstairs bathroom.” She swung her legs off me and strutted over to the door.

I walked up the stairs and went to my bathroom to wash up. When I was finished, I stared at myself in the mirror. I could see that my eyes weren’t the same. Sure, they were the same shade of ice blue, but I could see the sadness in them. It would always be there because of the loss of my family.

“Dash?” Garnet called for me from downstairs.

“Up here.” I yelled down to her. I closed my eyes, trying to remember Dart’s words to me the day he died. Garnet was still here for a reason. Why am I so scared to tell her how I really feel?

“You okay?”

My eyes connected with her soft brown eyes. She was beautiful, standing there in my bathroom doorway. Her hair was a little messed up, and her clothes were wrinkled from our quickie.

“I’m great,” I stood in front of her.

“Well, do you want to study more? I know you have an early practice in the morning. Not sure if you want to go to bed or not?”

“Can we talk first?” I needed to get my feelings in order so I could focus on the rest of this week.

“Of course.”

I took her hand and led her to the bed. This was hard. Should it be hard? Dart said he was nervous when asking Daisy to marry him, and I wasn’t sure how to say the words. I truly don’t think it was hard; I think it was just my nerves.

“Life is short,” I started. “Between my parents and Dart, I realized that. I…” I paused feeling a lump in my throat. “I’m sorry about how I treated you the past couple of weeks.”

“Dash,” she touched my cheek. “You lost your brother. There’s no need to apologize.”

“Dart would have kicked my ass knowing I was yelling at you.”

“True, but it’s okay. We’re going to get through this.”

“Together?”

“Together.” She placed a soft kiss on my lips.

“I love you.” I said it. I said the one emotion that outweighed the others. Yes, I missed my brother. Yes, I would do anything to have him back. However, I know Dart wouldn’t want me to let my life pass me by. He was always the smart one. He knew what needed to be said and when . Now, I needed to be that person.

“What?”

That wasn’t the first response that I was looking for. “I said: I love you.” I repeated it to her.

“Wow,” she let go of my hand, stood up, and paced the room.

“Garnet, do you not love me?” And ice-cold fear ran through my veins.

She stopped, pushing her hands through her red hair. “I love you. I do love you, Dash. It just sucks.”

“Loving me sucks?” I was confused by what she was saying.

“No, no,” she waved her hands back and forth. “Loving you doesn’t suck. I was talking about everything else.”

“I don’t understand what you mean.”

Garnet sat down next to me. “This is going to sound so selfish, and it make me a terrible person but you just lost Dart, and we know you’re going to the NFL. Would you have said it if Dart was alive? Or if you weren’t scared about losing your chance to be drafted?”

“Yes,” I told her firmly. “I had no doubt in my mind. Do you know how I know that?”

She shook her head.

I took a moment thinking of our last conversation. “The day Dart died we talked about my feelings for you. I knew I loved you then, and I do love you even more now. It doesn’t matter if I make it to the NFL or not, I’ll be yours forever.”

“Don’t you mean when you make it to the NFL?”

I chuckled. “I guess I should have said when I make it to the NFL.”

“I love you too, Dash. I’m not going to lie, because I’m nervous, but like you said, life is short. I won’t let this moment pass us by.” She leaned in and kissed me.

~~

I went early because I knew it was going to be rough on me. Garnet asked if she needed to come to, but I told her no. This was something I had to do on my own.

Now, here I stood, staring at my uniform. The room was already stationed with all of the practice jerseys, and pads were neatly hung. On the back of everyone’s helmet was a black sticker with the number twenty-one on it.

As always, the locker next to mine was Dart’s and full of his things. Marshall was still dressing it. I had heard of other teams that had members die recognize the players by bringing out their things for every game at every practice and game.

I swallowed the lump of grief and tears back that were damn near choking me. Would I be able to do this? Since the first time I ever walked on to a football field, Dart had been with me. This time, he wouldn’t be.

I touched my jersey, feeling the silky material between my fingers. I thought about Garnet. Waking up with her in my arms was keeping the fog away. However, the words of her tattoo were replaying in my head at this very moment.