Darkening Chaos: Book Three of The Destroyer Trilogy (32 page)

“Yes,
I do,” he says forcefully, interrupting my mounting hysteria.

“How?”
I ask.

He
smoothes the hair back from my face. His body heat spreads through me as he
presses me closer to him. There is no doubt in his expression when he says, “I
know you wouldn’t have turned into Drake, because you never would have killed
me, Libby. As much as it would have tortured me, you would have let me kill you
rather than taking my life. I know you. You seem to think that a cloud of pain
and misery follow you wherever you go, but you’re wrong. You are so wrong. You
see the bad things of this world and blame yourself for them. Look at all the
good you’ve done.”

“What
good have I done? Hammond is dead, so many people I’ve cared about are dead
because of me.” I touch the pendant Lance gave me and stare at the two halves. I’m
supposed to have both sides inside of me, but when is the good half going to
show up?

“You
mean aside from freeing the Ciphers and unlocking their talents?” he asks.
“Well, let me see. You’ve saved the lives of Dean and the other new Ciphers,
saved Hope and her family, told people about what the Guardians are really
doing and made them think, changed both Lance’s and my mind about you, and I
don’t know how, but you stopped the most evil man I have ever met and made him
actually want to help you. You’ve done things no one else in history has ever
done before, too. And if you need another reason, the one I think is the most
important is you made me fall in love with you.”

Braden
runs his hands through my hair slowly, his eyes never leaving mine. “Libby, I
know bad things have happened, people have been hurt, but you’ve stopped even
more pain. The bad doesn’t follow you, you follow it, because you care about
other people and you want to stop it from happening if you can. That’s why I
know you’ll never turn into Drake. Your heart is too filled with love and
compassion to ever make room for selfishness and hate. Maybe the whole world
doesn’t see that yet, but they will.”

“Do
you really believe that?” I ask.

“Absolutely,”
he says before kissing me.

The
fear I was holding onto dissolves as I kiss him back. The usual teasing and
insinuating I would start up with Braden in this situation doesn’t surface. With
my head straightened back out, the details of what I need to do come back to
the front of my mind. I reluctantly pull myself out of his grip and start to
sit up. I get lightheaded and sway right away. Braden pushes me back down.

“Libby,
stay put, please. What you did to Drake took a lot out of you. You may need a
little more time to recover,” he says.

“More
time? How long have I been out?”

Braden
slips his arm under my neck and curls up next to me. “Two days. It’s Sunday
night.”

“Two
days? What happened to Jen? I was going to talk to her.”

“We
couldn’t keep her here,” Braden says. “Lance tried talking to her, but he
couldn’t get her to keep her mouth shut. She’s already told everyone what
happened.”

“Howe
knows we broke the truce,” I say glumly.

I
knew the truce was never going to last until my eighteenth birthday, but if I
could have kept the Guardians from finding out about this I would have. A room
full of dead Seekers would have been blamed on me regardless, but without Jen
blabbing it to everyone they wouldn’t have had any proof. President Howe is not
going to be happy.

“I
can’t believe her. I’ve been sitting here doing nothing for two days and Jen is
out telling the world what we just did.”

“You
haven’t been doing nothing. You been resting, which you need to keep doing.
Besides, Jen didn’t exactly tell everything.”

“What
do you mean?”

“Lance
was able to convince her to spin what happened in a slightly different light.
She told everyone that you
rescued
Drake instead of kidnapping him.”

I
blink in confusion. “What? Why would anyone ever believe that?”

“Jen
is a better reporter than I gave her credit for. She already knew Drake had
staged a coup and failed. She also knew that Howe was about to make a move on
Drake,” Braden says. “Jen chose to interpret what she saw as Drake making a
desperate move to dodge Howe by coming to us for help.”

“Wow.
And people are actually buying that?” I ask.

Braden
frowns. “Well, since Drake isn’t available to tell everyone we’re lying, people
are starting to believe it.”

I
shake my head at the strange turn of events. Maybe Braden is right. Maybe there
is some good to my life. If there wasn’t, I wouldn’t have gotten a break like
this. I lean deeper into the pillows and press myself closer to Braden.

When
Braden shifts, I worry he’s going to leave so I can rest. I grab his hand and
beg him not to leave. “I’m not leaving, Libby. I’ve been with you the whole
time, and I’ll stay with you as long as you need me.”

“Do
I get to decide when I don’t need you anymore? Because that might never come.”
I know I need to get busy, but I just couldn’t resist that. I smile and wait
for him to tease me back. Instead, his kind expression crumbles.

“After
the last couple days, I don’t know that I want that day to come, either.”

I’ve
wanted to hear him say that for so long. Night after night of me in his arms
sounds like heaven, but the way he said it makes me worry. I remember shoving
the last of my power into Drake so I could steal his talents and free him from
his Oath, but nothing after that. I should remember something of what I did,
shouldn’t I? I pull my left hand up so I can see it and spot the four new
diktats alongside the ones I took from Braden. It should be reassuring, but
Braden lowers his eyes and looks away.

“Braden,
what happened?”

 He
doesn’t answer me. Panic creeps into my voice quickly.

“What
happened? Braden, please tell me what happened. Where’s Drake?” I ask, my hands
starting to shake again.

Taking
my hands in his, Braden says, “Libby, I meant what I said before. You’re
changing the world for the better. You can’t forget that.”

“Braden,
please,” I beg.

He
sighs and looks down at our hands. “Drake didn’t make it. He was just too weak.
You almost didn’t make it, either, Libby. I was so scared. I couldn’t wake you
after you collapsed, no one could.”

He
was a horrible person who had done horrible things, but he made the right
choice in the end. He wanted to help, to try and make amends for what he had
done. Drake was going to help me fight the Guardians, tell me what they did to
the Cipher. “I killed him?”

“No,
we all heard him ask you to do it, Libby. It wasn’t your fault. He just wasn’t
strong enough. His talents weren’t strong enough,” he says. Braden grabs my
shoulders when I try to sit back up, his push is gentle but firm. “Libby, he
didn’t die right away. After you collapsed, he was still alive for a few
minutes. He knew he was dying, though, and he asked us to tell you something.”

“What?”
I ask.

“Thank
you.”

Braden’s
jaw tightens for a moment, but curves into a shaky smile eventually. “I hate
him for what he did to me. I’m glad he’s dead, to be honest, but he meant it,
Libby. You did what I never could have done. You gave him peace. He died with
Audrey’s name on his lips. I hate him, but I’m glad he had the chance to make
the right choice. Maybe some people will say it doesn’t matter, because he died
before he could make up for what he’s done. He didn’t know he would die when he
made the choice, though. After the kind of life he’d lived, in the end he made
the right choice. It gives me hope.”

I’m
quiet and still in his arms. When Drake manipulated him back at the Hacienda,
those feelings were already there. His hatred for Drake was just waiting to be
nudged. He wanted to kill him. I don’t know what he put Braden through. I feel
the threat of tears every time I even think about it. Yet now, Braden can speak
of Drake’s final hours in a completely different way. Hope. That was what
Audrey felt right before Drake killed her. I believe she let her life slip away
knowing her death would not only redeem the man she loved, but offer hope to
the rest of the world.

I
promise myself that I won’t let her sacrifice be wasted. My mind begins
speeding along pathways that will allow me to do that, to tell the world their
story, but Braden interrupts me. “Libby, I know you’re not quite yourself yet,
but everyone is wondering what you got from Drake. Kayla especially. She
doesn’t blame anyone but Drake for Hammond’s death, but she’s desperate to know
that he didn’t die in vain. Did you find what you were looking for?”

That
was the whole point of what I did, I remind myself. Finding Audrey’s story, it will
be important to further our cause, but it’s going to have to take a back seat
for the moment.

“Yes,”
I say, “well, most of it. I found the rest of the prophecy, but I didn’t
understand much of what I saw of the Cipher creatures.”

“Tell
me about them, about both. Maybe we can figure it out together.”

Braden
helps prop me up on a couple of pillows and sits up next to me. The room is
still dark, aside from a bedside lamp. Braden slips his arm around my
shoulders, letting me lean against his chest. I love that when he says
together, he means together. I have known my fate for a long time. Dying has
been on my mind almost constantly. Acceptance came at some point that I would
die very young, but I never stopped wishing it could be different. Since
meeting Braden, I have been more determined than ever to reach old age.
Something in what I learned from Drake must be able to help me make that
happen.

Quickly,
I bring the prophecy to the front of my mind, saving the mention of what they
did to the Cipher for a little longer. I repeat the last three stanzas for
Braden word for word.

“We
cannot stop her, not alone.

“She
will steal our brothers, take their power.

“We
must do the same.

“One
of her own will be her downfall.

“Unrestricted,
Cassia the Destroyer will be the end of our world.

“She
will unravel the purity of our work and turn society against us.

“Our
power will be lost forever unless we seize all control first,

“Break
the laws of Power and transform this world into one she can never save.

“This
is our mission,

“Our
legacy,

“Our
lives.

“Kill
the Destroyer, the anathema to our perfection.”

The
first version of the prophecy ended with the lines, “We cannot stop her. Cassia
the Destroyer will be the end of our world.” Everything else of what I repeated
is brand new. When I got the first version of the prophecy from Braden, I
wasn’t able to get rid of the promise that kept him from talking about it. His
eagerness to discuss it now shows one more plus side to me taking his talents
and obliterating every promise and Oath he’d ever made.

“Well,”
Braden says, “that explains why not everyone got the whole prophecy.”

“What
do you mean? These extra parts at least explain things more. The first version
left off making you feel like it was inevitable that I’d win. It seemed like
the Guardians were telling their own people that what they were doing was
pointless.”

“Mr.
Walters tried to explain it when he told you this could be looked at as more of
a possibility than a prophecy. That’s how the Guardians treated it. Cassia
would win unless we found a way to stop her.”

“But
wouldn’t telling them how they’re supposed to stop me make more sense?” I ask.

Braden
shakes his head. “Contrary to popular belief, not all Guardians are as sick and
twisted as Drake was. If they told new recruits right off that Cassia was going
to take Guardians and steal their power, for one, but also that they’d have to
break the laws of power to stop her even though she was the one doing the right
thing in the first place, they’d have a much harder time getting people to sign
up with them. Most people join the Guardians willingly because they think they’re
going to help people. It’s not until they’ve been there a few years that they
realize the whole ‘protect and serve’ thing is just a pipe dream.”

So
they give them an impossible task instead. Knowing firsthand how pigheaded and
stubborn Guardians can be, I guess I can understand that. Any of the Guardian
class members I know get pretty indignant when you tell them they can’t do
something. In fact, it’s the best way to make sure they will do it.

“You
know, when I got the first version from you, I didn’t understand very much of
it. This new stuff, though, it seems so plain. Too plain, almost,” I say.

“What
do you mean?”

“Well,
the first new stanza, it says they can’t stop me on their own because I’ll
steal their people and power. Idris says one of my own will defeat me. The
Guardians must think that means the Ciphers, the ones they’re changing, and I
think I agree with them because of the last couple lines of the next stanza. It
says they’ll have to seize all control by breaking the laws of power. Whatever
they were doing to that poor Cipher, they were definitely breaking some laws of
power,” I say, shivering at the memory.