Dark Passion (The Dark Brother Series Book One) (12 page)

W: It doesn’t matter what’s right for me. Maybe I am better off. Maybe I’m not. I’ll never know and neither will you.

J: U said u wanted to leave…u never said
u wanted anything more.

W: No, I didn’t.

J: What does that mean Willow?

W: Goodbye Jagger, I hope
u find what you’re looking for.

J: Don’t…fuck…Willow, answer me.

I switch my phone off with the intentions of never turning it on again.

~*~*~*~

The next week of my life is painful. I spend hours at the police department, lying through my teeth to protect a man who doesn’t even want me. I tell them I was blindfolded, and didn’t see or hear anything. I was dumped at my doorstep after a month, I don’t know why. I told Ava to agree with me, even though she wants Jagger to go down. I told her how dangerous it was for her to tell the truth.

My
Sister Jenny cried for the days by my side, and I did my best to comfort her. I kept details to a minimum; I don’t want her to know about my Father. She doesn’t need that pain. So, basically, the week has been hell and all I can think about it him. Jagger. I miss him so much; words can’t describe the pain I feel. I know it’s off, so I make an appointment with a shrink.

I’m sitting in her office on day eight, staring at the wall with a grim expression. Doctor Peterson is a tall, pretty woman with flaming red hair and blue eyes. She smiles a lot and nods her head constantly, as though she’s agreei
ng with everything I’m saying; which I know she’s not. She must think I’m crazy. I have no doubt about it.

“So, what happened after you two had sex?”

I glare at her. “He made love to me, you don’t understand.”

She nods again, fuck her dammed head nodding. “I think you believe you made love, but making love is for people in love. From what you tell me, this man didn’t love you.”

“He took care of me, he freaked out when I was hurt, and he said kind things to me. He wasn’t a monster, he cared enough.”

“Caring and loving are two different things
, Willow.”

“I know that,” I snap.

“Why don’t we look at the fact that he hasn’t contacted you at all this past week?”

“I told him not to.”

“And you don’t think a man in love would try anyway?”

“I know what you’re thinking, and I don’t have it. I don’t have
Stockholm syndrome.”

“I didn’t say that, while it’s common in kidnapping victims, I believe your case is a little different. Your kidnapper didn’t take you to hurt you, in a sense; he took you to protect you.”

“How do you suppose that?” I snort.

“From what you tell me, the other option would have been much worse.”

I shudder.

“Why don’t you tell me more about your feelings for this man?
Help me understand.”

“I’m not crazy.”

“I never said you were.”

“My feelings aren’t fake,
”

“While I believe this man didn’t intend on hurting you, I’m not quite sure I’d go as far as saying he cares about you so tell me how you came about feeling this way for him.”

“He cared.”

“Cared?”

“Seriously, can we just drop it? I survived, I made it through and I’m free. End of story.”

“Why did you just change the subject Willow?”

I huff,
“Because I don’t know how to answer you without sounding insane!”

“Then tell me, what is it that makes y
ou want to be with him so badly?”

“I didn’t say I want to be with him.”

She leans back in her chair and writes down some more notes. “Ok, so you don’t miss him?”

“Of course I do!”

“Can you tell me why?”

“I don’t know why, I hate that I m
iss someone who did that to me. It makes no sense in my mind, I feel like I’m losing the plot. I care about him and I don’t know why, I don’t know anything. When we made love, he was different. He was sweet and caring, he was…beautiful.”

She nods and then closes her note book. “I think that’s enough for today. I want you to go home and think about why you
defend him, and why you resent him and bring me some notes for our next session.”

I don’t thank her, or say anything else. I just stand and walk out. This is doing my head in and I can’t deal with it.

~*~*~*~

“Willow, it’s ok, I don’t expect you to come.” Jenny says, tipping some sugar into her coffee.

It’s day eighteen of my release, and I don’t feel any better. I miss Jagger, God, I miss him. My shrink tries to make sense of it, of me, but she’s getting nowhere. I’m all over the place. I hate him. I love him. I resent him. I can’t get anything right in my head. I haven’t turned my phone on and I refuse to. If he wanted to find me, he would.

“I don’t mind Jenny, I have to get back to life sooner rather than later,” I say,
sipping my coffee. It’s Jenny’s birthday tonight and she’s having a party at a local club. She’s trying to tell me I don’t have to go.

“Willow, I don’t think you’re ready.” Ava says, agreeing with Jenny.

“I’m not a fucking mental case!” I cry, slamming my hand down on the table. Both the girls stare at me with wide eyes, well, that didn’t help my case. “I just want to be normal, I just want my life back and you two are smothering me.”

“Willow…we’re not trying to.”

“Well you are!” I cry, standing.

“Willow, please….” Jenny begs.

“I’m coming Jenny, because I have to learn to live again.”

She nods and Ava does too.

“I’ll see you guys tonight, I need fresh air.”

I walk the four blocks to our apartment. I can’t think with all this
smothering. I know they have my best interests at heart, but they have to understand how hard it is for me. I am finding it hard to settle back in, Jagger is on my mind day and night and I can’t breathe right without him and that scares the hell out of me because I don’t know why I feel that way and I’m scared I’m losing it slowly.

By the time Ava and Jenny have gone shopping and come home, I’m ready to go out. I refuse to wallow any longer. Neither
argues with me again, instead, I help them get ready. For a moment, I feel normal as we laugh and style each other’s hair. It feels…right. When we’re ready, we walk to the club down the road. Thank God it’s not the one Ava and I went to, I don’t think I could bring myself to go in there.

The club we’ve picked is quieter than most, hence why it was chosen. Jenny’s friends find her and the squealing and happy birthday’s begin. I have my hair down and it covers my low cut, short, black dress. Why? Because my back is now
permanently scarred from Snake’s beatings. I hate him for that and I hope he rots in hell where he belongs.

The night starts off well, Ava and I groove on the dance floor and I make sure all my drinks are
purchased by me and only me. I get drunk very quickly, and for the first time in weeks, I feel good. I know it’s not the right way to go about it, but to be free of those feelings for just a moment is nice. Ava and I are shoving through the crowd for another drink, when I see a group of men standing in the corner out of the way of the lights.

My heart stops. It literally stops. Jagger and
the boys are standing and watching me. How long has he been here watching me? Is he following me? Oh God, is he going to take me again? My eyes meet his and I’m sure I see him flinch. I grip Ava’s hand. “We have to leave, now.”

“Why, what’s wrong?”

“He’s here.”

“What?
Who?”

I nod my head and she turns, star
ing at Jagger. “Oh God, we should call the police.”

“No, let’s just go. Out back. Now.”

“Jenny?”

I scan the dance floor, I can’t see her. When I spot her at the bar, I rush over and take her arm.

“We have to leave.”

“What? NO!”

“He’s here.”

That’s enough for her, she takes my hand and we rush out the back.
We just get out the door, when a hand grips my arm and spins me around. I scream and kick out, but Jagger has me. Jenny cries out and smacks him with her bag and Ava screams as Angel takes her and wraps his arms around her.

“I’m not gonna hurt her,” Jagger says as
Ace grips Jenny and holds her back.

“Let me go, please don’t do this to me again.”

Jagger pushes me against the wall, his hard body pressing into me and bringing me back to life. I’m drunk and it’s impossible to try and push him away. His mouth goes down to my ear.

“I just need to talk, ok?
It’s urgent.”

I nod, swallowing. Jagger lets me go and turns
towards the girls again.

“I promise you she’
ll be safe.”

“Let her go, you fucking asshole!” Ava cries.

“Ava,” I whisper. “I’ll be ok. I promise.”

“Willow, please,” Jenny whimpers.

“I give you my word; I will drop her home as soon as I’m done.” Jagger says.

Ava looks at me and I nod. She struggles and screams as
Angel and Ace drag her and Jenny to the car and shove them in. Then they all get in and drive off.

“Where are they taking them?” I cry.

“Home,”

“Jagger, why are you here?”

“We need to talk.”

“I have nothing to say to you.”

“Well you don’t get a choice, come on.”

“Have you been following me?”

He stills and stares down at me; I get a good look at him under the street light. He’s wearing a white V-neck, sleeveless jersey and God, it looks gorgeous on him. His jeans are a dark blue and he has a thick silver chain around his neck. His dark hair is messy and he has a light shade of stubble on that beautiful jaw.

“Only tonight,
”

“Why?”

“Long story, get in.”

He shoves me towards his car, but I lash out and scurry away. He manages to grip my arm again, and he slams me against the door. I cry out and kick, missing him twice.

“Willow, hey, I’m not going to take you away again…”

“Please, my life has been awful the past few weeks. I just want to get away from all this
.” I cry, shaking my head from side to side.

“Shhh, hey, shhh,
”

“Please Jagger; just leave me alone, you’re making this so hard on me
…”

I’m squirming and thrashing, I
just wanted to forget him and everything about him. Suddenly, his lips are on mine and oh God, I crumble. I melt against the car as he pushes his body onto mine and secures me between the door and himself. I can’t help my hands, they slide up his neck and tangle into his hair and I pull him deeper into the kiss.

He groans and runs his hands down the side of my body, making me shiver. “This dress is too fuckin’ short.”

“So?” I whisper.

“So, I don’t like it.”

Is Jagger playing concern? Is he being possessive and over protective? My heart speeds up.

“Jagger…” I whimper when he lifts my leg and tucks it around his hip.

“I’ve missed you, God I’ve fuckin’ missed you.”

He slides his hand up the inside of my thigh and finds my damp panties.
Whoa, this is happening so fast. Why aren’t I shoving him away and abusing him? God, because I’ve needed him so badly; I’m so alone.

“So fuckin’ wet
for me, baby?”

“Yes,” I moan when he slides his fingers under the fabric and tweaks my clit.

I cling to him, needing him so badly I can’t think straight. It’s sick, twisted and wrong, but for a moment, I feel like everything is right again. His free hand unbuckles his belt and I feel him jerk his jeans down just enough to free his hard cock. In seconds, he is thrusting inside me, deep and hard. I cry out and grip his arms, throwing my head back.

He thrusts with need, growling my name and crushing my lips with his. His arms are hard and tensing beneath my palms and his hips are thrashing, slamming my body against the car. His mouth moves down to bite my neck and I cry out as an intense orgasm rips through my body. I shudder
violently and tighten around him as he explodes with a hoarse growl.

When he stops thrusting, he pulls out of me and yanks his jeans back up. I pull my panties back into place and drop my leg, leaving my head leaning back on the car. I stare up at the stars, wondering what the hell just
happened. Did we just fuck in a back car park? Jagger takes my face and tilts it down to meet his.

“I’ve missed you,” he murmurs, resting his forehead against mine.

Run Willow, run now! Don’t sink again.

“Please…
”

“I’m sorry to have to disrupt your life again.”