Dark Love (The Two Sides of Me Book 3) (32 page)

“MIA!” I jump to the edge of my seat furthest from him and whip my head in his direction.

“Sorry!” I yelp. He reaches out to touch my arm, and I flinch.

“Don’t apologize, baby, just tell me what is going on? What is this?”

“That song…” I whisper.

“What? You know it?”

“Yes.” I move back to the center of my seat, and he touches me again my guard is down now, and I don’t flinch.”

“
What does it mean?” he asks while running his hand up and down my arm soothingly. I can’t remember the exact words so I reach for his phone on of the table and google the lyrics, when they pop up on the screen I turn it toward him and he takes it
, locking eyes with mine for a moment before looking at the screen. His frown deepens as he reads.

“Fuck.” His curse frightens me, if he is taken by surprise by this then there is good reason to be afraid.

“Who would be doing this, Evan?” Mr. Saint silently moved to stand patiently at Evan’s side the moment we realized something was wrong.

“A million people, Mrs. Lawson, it could be any one of the people from his past.”

“I thought we had all of that handled.”

“Apparently not.” Handled? Apparently not? What the hell is going on, more fucking secrets!

“Evan!” I scream.

“Mia, calm down. I will talk to you about this but not until I am convinced that you are going to listen without stressing the fuck out.” His words are steady and strong, poignant and direct, calm the fuck down or stay in the dark, message received loud and clear.

“Ok, ok I need a minute,” I say nearly panting with anxiety.

“Do you need to lie down?” Probably, I would actually love just to close my eyes and have this all go away, denial and avoidance sound lovely right about now.

“No, I’ll be all right.” He scoots his chair closer to mine and gestures to Saint to leave us alone.

“Shush…it’s probably just some nut job trying to extort money from me, we can handle it; don’t worry.” He rubs his hand in small circles over my back while I take deep breaths trying to prove to him I can handle whatever it is he has to tell me.

“Good, everything is ok now?” I give him a tiny nod, but no way am I believing a word of his shit, he’s lying again, trying to protect me from his past but I’m beginning to think there is no way to escape it, the other side of him will always be out there being loathed, despised…hunted. Time for a mental pep talk. Ok Mia, get your shit together, no way can you not worry about this but you’ve gotta get a game face on girl, this is important on so many levels. I look to the ceiling and blow out a long breath before beginning my acting career with a star performance.

“I’m good really, I don’t know what came over me it’s just that song is so hateful and violent, and I’m hormonal. Go ahead with what you have to say, I’m fine. I swear.” I force my anxiety into a little black box away from the surface where it will be dealt with later, a trick I’ve been diligently coached not to do by therapists for years; but I still remember how and now seems like a perfect time to pull out some dusty old habits. Evan is examining me closely, considering my sudden change of emotional state. The pregnancy has him unsure of his usual mind reading abilities, hormones can make a man doubt his own sanity so it’s not completely unbelievable that I could have calmed so suddenly.

Narrowing his eyes I see the gears turning in his complex, multifaceted mind, he’s falling for my act!

“All right, I was going to have to tell you this sooner or later so it may as well be now; but I swear to God, Mia, if I see that artery in your neck quicken a fraction we are done here, understand?” Shit ok calm thoughts, the beach, a picnic in the park on a spring day, reading a good book…This isn’t working instead it’s causing my anxiety ridden imagination to run wild, sex on the beach with Evan, sex while picnicking with Evan in the park, reading a smutty novel about sex with Evan, holy hell!

“See you’re already getting worked up!” He shakes his head changing his mind when he notices my pulse picking up.

Ok, bring on the charm, Mia! Turning toward him I lip my hand between his legs. Oh yes, he’s taught me so well, the power of distraction is a wonderful thing.

“I was thinking about you and me, naked on a beach and in the park and the story of us written in a smutty book,” I say in my best sexy kitten voice, and all be damned, it works!

“On the beach?”

“Yep, on an island, the ocean waves nipping at our toes, the warm breeze blowing my tangled hair around my naked tanned skin while I ride yo…”

“Ok ok stop! Fuck, Mia.” He mutters something under his breath about tempting a saint, and I smile.

“I see what you are doing, do not think you are fooling me for a minute. Let’s go in the living room where it’s more comfortable, and you can lay back and listen to me.” I shrug my shoulders casually, and he plucks me from my chair. “I would love to throw you over my shoulder right now and spank that gorgeous perfect ass of yours.”

“Go for it, boss, I deserve it.” I pucker up my lips and use an exaggerated naughty girl voice.

“Mmm you get more wicked by the minute don’t you? That’s six for tempting me, ahh an even number again it feels so good,” he taunts

“I guess you did warn me didn’t you?”

“I certainly did.” He gently places me on one end of the couch in front of the monstrous fireplace that is magically burning when it wasn’t before breakfast.

Who the hell builds that fire and how do they know exactly when we will need it; this was an impromptu living room visit, completely unplanned. Sitting gracefully on the opposite end of the couch he pulls my feet into his lap and removes my shoes arranging them side by side on the floor next to his own feet. He presses his thumbs into the arch of one foot, and I moan out loud in appreciation.

“Oh God, that feels so good, why have you never done that before?”

“I have never had to resist you before; I’m keeping my distance down here.” I drop my head back against the overstuffed purple pillow and let my body melt into the plush piece of furniture while he works on one foot and then the other.

“You missed your calling; I think you would have been a hit as a masseuse.”

“I would have ended up a male escort if all my clients moaned as much as you do when I touch them.”

“Hush.” I giggle first at his playful tone but shudder in my mind at the thought of him as a male escort; he is so entirely mine. The thought is preposterous and nauseating. Oh no wait, that’s not the thought of him, being a prostitute, that’s breakfast.

“Oh boy.”

“Relax and take a deep breath, try to keep the food down, I don’t have anything for you to vomit in, baby, and I’m partial to this rug.” I close my eyes and take a deep breath and then another until my BLT settles back into its rightful place.

“Better?”

“Mmmhmm. I think so.”

“Mia, I don’t know who sent that tablet, but I am fairly confident it isn’t anyone from my days leading the family. Can you think of anyone who would want to hurt you?”

The first person to pop into my thoughts is the man who got away and went unpunished after my attack. Turning my face toward the warmth of the fire I hesitate to reply. My husband has a long reach and connections with some of the world's worst criminals; I don’t want him risking our new life together going after a shadow from my past.

“I’m always looking for him if he is found he is a dead man, baby. And I don’t think that is who we are looking for.” I face his all-knowing eyes and see my pain reflected in his sparkling bright green violet rimmed eyes, he still amazes me with his ability to read my every thought.

A ghost of a smile tips the corners of my lips up in thanks and appreciation of his love. “You’ve been looking for him? Please, Evan just leave it; he’s not worth your time or money, and he’s dangerous.”

“Yes, I am looking for him. I have had a team scouring the earth ever since the day you laid in my arms in Aunt Sophia’s bed in Italy and told me your horror story. As for not being worth my time or money, I would spend every last dime and search until the end of time to find him and end him slowly, painfully.”

“Oh…” My one-word answer says it all. It says holy fuck that guy better watch his back, it says I’m so glad I am and will never be on Evan Lawson’s bad side, it says he better is a master at staying hidden or else.

“Anyway, do you? Have anyone other than that maggot that would have a reason to threaten you?”

“No, of course not, no one,” I reply quickly.

“All right then, it must be me then.”

“What makes you so sure it’s not the mafia?”

“That is what I need to talk to you about. When I had my emergency surgery in Italy everyone was aware of my health issues. Dr. Carmichael was offered an obscene amount of money to snuff me out during surgery by another family leader.” I straighten up and tug my feet from his hands to sit cross-legged and alert.

“He what? But he…”

“He took it.”

“Ok now I’m super confused, why are you sitting here talking to me if he was paid to kill you?” My fucking heart is beating so loud I’m surprised he hasn’t stopped the conversation, I pull up my knees and wrap my arms around them causing my hair to fall forward hiding my neck and hopefully keeping my racing pulse a secret. He pulls one knee up and turns to face me straight on.

“Nice try, I will finish anyway though so you can stop hiding your neck from me like I am a vampire.” I roll my eyes.

“Go on then, I’m confused.”

“Well, Dr. Carmichael is a very smart man and he saw an opportunity to make a lot of money and escape the clutches of the mafia at the same time. He made a deal with Saint and Isaac to secretly keep me alive in exchange for his escape from the country and a safe place to spend the rest of his life. The ‘Ndrangheta and Camorra groups think I died at his hands. Dr. Carmichael has been unwillingly tangled up with many mob families during the course of his career and he wanted to be done with it.”

“He
faked
your death?!”

“Yes.”

“And they believed it?”

“Yes, he was very convincing, he provided a similar body and dental proof, they believe I’m gone.” Another body? Oh God.
I don’t even want to know where they got that.

“How are you going to run Dominus? How are we ever going to be in public again? We can’t hide forever!”

“All right here is the part that may upset you a little.”
This
is the part that might upset me?!! Are you fucking kidding me?! That train left the station a long time ago! He continues calmly while a storm rages in my mind.

“You know I am a twin and that Gabriella is my sister…”

“Yea duh.”

“The birth record shows that we were triplets, not just twins.” I shake my head in disbelieve scrunching up my face trying to process this new information. Triplets? What the hell? I go to say something, but the words don’t come out and he holds up his hand to stop me anyway.

“Two boys and a girl, there is, however, no death certificate for my brother who died during childbirth, my parents always told people they gave him up for adoption because she couldn’t raise three children. While he was gone so much of the time. So you see, essentially I have died and left my fortune to my twin brother. No one knew of my relationship with you; we arrived in Italy secretly because, well because you were not exactly a willing travel companion. So it has been made to seem that I stepped in inheriting a fortune bringing my lovely lucky wife with me.”

I am speechless, as in mind-numbingly unable to form words or sentences for communication. Closing my eyes I try to make sense of it all, I’ve got a million puzzle pieces of the same color and they all look the same, impossible to figure out. Yes, he was right to keep this one from me, I can’t believe I’m admitting that and I will never say it aloud but this is stress inducing, mind blowing, life altering information not meant for the faint of heart. He’s quiet, allowing this to all sink in, triplets, Evan is thought to be dead, Dr. Carmichael is with us forever, and I’m married to…who? I align my thoughts enough to ask one question

“What’s your name?” Strong, comforting arms reach for me, and my limp shocked body is pulled easily into his warm lap, whoever
he
is now.

“I am and will always be Evan to you, baby, as far as anyone in my past knows though I am Nathaniel, Evan’s identical twin brother.”

“Nate? That’s your middle name…”

“Yes, we thought it would be easier to use something familiar.”

“Won’t they be suspicious?”

“No, probably not, siblings often share the same middle name or take their father's last name as their first. I will just say I go by my middle name, which is Nathaniel, the same as my dead brother’s.”

“Can that happen? I mean two babies be identical and another just a twin, or triplet shit this is confusing!”

“Yes, my brother and I were identical and Gabriella was a spare.” He laughs softly at his little joke.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

“Why would I? I was never supposed to be able to have children and neither were you. It didn’t occur to me to tell you about my brother.” Ok, so that makes sense I guess, I’m going to need some time to absorb all of this.