Dante (23 page)

“I was thinking of making this a regular thing. Having him spend a night a week with us.”

“I’d like that,” Dante said simply.

Cat was happy her suspicions about what Dante needed to connect with Johnathan had been correct.

“
Alzare
?” Dante asked his nephew.

Johnathan’s chubby little arms flew out, his hands making that grabbing motion again. Dante plucked the boy up, balancing the squirming baby on his hip before making his way toward the living room.

“Coming, Cat?”

“Catty!”

Cat grinned. “Yeah, I’m coming.”

Later in the evening, Cat stayed huddled in the large recliner as she watched her husband and nephew play on the floor. Johnathan had been bathed, ate his small nighttime snack, and was now snug in his footie pajamas while clutching his little blue blanket. A small sippy cup half full with formula rested between Johnathan’s legs. He sat on the floor at his uncle’s side, although Dante had rolled over on his back.

Dante pushed three age appropriate plastic cars in front of Johnathan. “
Uno. Due. Tre
.” Johnathan touched each car as his uncle counted. “
Ben fatto
, John.”

The baby clapped and bounced in his spot, making Cat smile and giggle. His innocent happiness at being praised was sickeningly cute. Dante seemed to enjoy his nephew’s joy, too.

“
Verde
?” Dante asked.

Johnathan stuck his thumb in his mouth and reached over with his other hand to pick the green car.

“
Blu
?”

The baby tapped the blue car with his palm.

“
Brava
,” Dante said. Johnathan’s pealing giggles were muffled around his thumb when his uncle swept him up from the floor and set him down on his stomach. Dante tickled the child as Johnathan squealed and kicked. “
Mio ragazzo intelligente
.”

Cat couldn’t contain her grin if she tried. Their private glee in playing such a simple game was sweet and it warmed her from the inside out.

It also hurt.

Her mind drifted to Michel. Something painful sliced through her heart like a knife. Dante may have accepted his fate to be childless a long time ago, but what if he didn’t have to be? What if Michel—

Cat stopped that thought before it even began. It wasn’t possible. There was far too much danger surrounding the child if he were brought out into the open where his father could steal him back.

She considered Dante, too. The betrayal and anger he would feel over her lies would be suffocating. He would never forgive her and good God, the very idea of that cut her right down to the bone.

Cat blinked, understanding something she hadn’t before. She had no real reason to do the things she did today for her husband. They were friends, sure. Lovers now that she had given in to her desires. But mostly, they were just partners in their agreement for the marriage.

Except … she let it turn into something far more without realizing it.

Dante’s intense gaze met Cat’s from across the room. He was still laughing with a giggling Johnathan bouncing on his middle.

It ached so badly. Because she loved him.

What had she done?

• • •

Cat blinked awake in the darkened bedroom and immediately seized stiff. She turned from side to side in the bed, looking for little Johnathan. He had been a bit fussy before they tried to put him down to sleep in his portable playpen and Cat brought the baby into their bed to see if that might help.

She must have fallen asleep with him. Where was he?
Merda
. She would make a horrible
Mamma
to a child. She couldn’t even keep track of a ten-month-old. How in the hell would she ever manage a newborn that needed her every second of the damn day? It took Cat an entire minute to realize Johnathan still couldn’t walk, she had placed him in the middle of the bed between Dante and her so he couldn’t roll off, and he wasn’t crying on the floor. She felt stupid.

“Calm down,
bella mia
. I took John to his bed a while ago once I knew he was down for the count. He hasn’t made a sound for a good hour.”

Cat sunk into the plush blankets, sighing in relief. Through the dark, she eyed Dante at the other end of the bedroom. He sat on a corner chair with his chin propped up in his hand and his elbow resting on his knee. With his silk dress shirt unbuttoned, it left his muscular chest exposed for Cat to enjoy. She adored the tattooed eagle with its wide wings spread across his pecs.

“What have you been doing for the last hour?” Cat asked.

“Watching you sleep,” Dante answered.

Cat lifted a single brow. “Why?”

“Because I wanted to and this is also my bedroom. You snore, by the way.”

“I absolutely do not!”

“You do,” Dante replied, nodding. “It’s not very loud and you only do it when you’re quite tired. It’s cute, actually.”

Cat made a face. “Really?”

“To me it is, I guess. I am such an idiot.”

Well, that wasn’t what she expected to hear. “Why would you say that?”

Dante didn’t answer, instead saying, “Thank you for today. I’ve been stuck trying to keep myself disengaged from Johnathan that I didn’t realize how much it was hurting me to do so.”

“You don’t need to thank me for that again, Dante.”

“I know. I wanted children, Cat.”

Cat sucked in a hard breath, forcing herself to sit up in the bed. “Oh?”

“Yes. There’s a difference between not being able to and not wanting to. I never said I didn’t want them just that I couldn’t. I settled my feelings with the fact it wasn’t going to happen. But I do want them. People assume because I can’t that I automatically don’t want them at all. Really, I haven’t given anyone a good reason to believe otherwise, so I don’t blame them.”

“You seem to be good with Johnathan.”

“Kids don’t make me nervous, if that’s what you mean.”

“It was,” Cat said low. “I didn’t intend to bring him here and have all your misgivings worked up again.”

“John being here didn’t do that. It’s been rolling around for a while, and I’ve kept it to myself.”

“You don’t have to do that. You could talk to me, Dante.”

“I know and that makes it so much harder for me,” Dante whispered.

Cat was so confused that she didn’t know what to say.

“I know I can talk to you,” Dante continued, dropping his foot the floor and sitting straight in the chair. “About anything, right?”

“Of course.”

“Exactly. And we fit so well together. In bed, work, and life. We fit. It works and it’s crazy. I hate it and I need it at the same time. That wasn’t supposed to happen. It shouldn’t have happened and I don’t have the first fucking clue how you did it.”

Cat swallowed audibly, feeling a dead weight rest in her stomach. “I—”

“No, I just need you to listen. You are in here now. All through me everywhere. That’s where you are. You somehow make me better. It’s almost fucking disgusting the way I don’t even care that it happened, either.

“It was like I turned around one day, blinked, and everything changed, Cat. We agreed when we first started out with this that we would be good together because emotional attachments shouldn’t happen and neither of us wanted strings. Feelings weren’t a part of the deal and I am sorry.”

“Dante—”

“I’m sorry because I love you.”

Cat’s tension released all at once, dropping her into the bed again. “Oh.”

“Yeah,
oh
. So, I don’t know what you want to do with this or how you want to go from here. Because I sure as shit know where I’m at, but I haven’t got the first clue about you. It’s killing me. You’re killing me.”

“Love isn’t supposed to hurt,
bello
.”

“It doesn’t. Believe me, that isn’t what hurts right now. At first I thought it did, but that’s because I didn’t understand.”

“What does hurt?”

“Everything else. I’m wide open. One giant target. My ribs might as well be broken and spread so I can bleed out. That’s how I feel. I set myself up for this even if I can’t figure out how. I am vulnerable in more ways than one. For someone to hurt me by way of you, for my own emotions to control me, and for you to reject me. I did this and it fucking
sucks
. It blows in the worst way.”

“You don’t want to love me?”

“It has nothing to do with not wanting to,” Dante snapped, waving his hand in the air. “Seems we don’t get much choice in that. It just comes along, kicks you in the goddamn heart, and there you are—
fucked
.”

“Wow,” Cat whispered.

“I know. I am so messed up in my head right now.”

“Because you love me.”

“Didn’t we just get that out of the way?”

“I’m not sure of anything at the moment.”

“Me, either,” Dante muttered. “It was so easy for my brothers to love. They didn’t feel like it was going to kill them. They didn’t struggle with what it all meant. I had come to the conclusion that love wasn’t going to be a part of my life because it made shit more complicated than what was necessary.”

Cat fidgeted, choosing her next words carefully. “It wasn’t easy for you to fall in love with me?”

Ouch. Was she that hard to love?

“What?” Dante’s head whipped up, his jade gaze burning into Cat. “No, that’s not what I said. I said nothing about falling in love, just loving. Yes, it was easy for me to fall in love with you. So easy, in fact, that I didn’t even realize it had happened.”

“But it’s hard for you to love me?” Cat frowned, wishing this conversation wasn’t so damn difficult. “That doesn’t make it much better, Dante.”

“You still don’t get it,” Dante said, sinking into the chair and looking defeated. “And I am way too screwed up to explain it properly.”

Cat tried to see it from his perspective the best she could. “It was easy to fall in love, but hard to love.”

“Okay, let’s go with that.”

“Dante …”

“Listen, I am aware of how ridiculous it sounds.”

“Well, great, because you’re not making me feel particularly good with the way you’re talking.”

“Why would you want to feel good about this, Cat? You don’t want me to love you, remember? That’s why this is hard for me. You don’t want this at all and now I’m exposed. I can’t pretend like I don’t give a shit. Not about you. We’re business. No feelings. No att—”

“Attachments,” Cat interjected, nodding once. “But that’s the thing about strings, Dante, even if they’re not strong ones. We tied a couple between us at the beginning of this arrangement and they’ve turned into ropes.”

“Now, we’re bound.”

“Yes. And we did that, we made this choice, so it’s okay.”

Dante’s brow furrowed as he stared blankly at the wall. “I think I missed something,
Amore
.”

“You’ve been sitting there for an hour watching me sleep and stewing in your own personal hell, haven’t you?” Cat asked.

“
Sì
. It was awful.”

“I wish you would have woken me up sooner, Dante.”

“Why, so you could have made a quicker exit? I’m still waiting for you to run, by the way.”

“
Stolto
. You’re so stuck inside your own head and worries that you can’t even see what is right in front of your face. My heart aches for you. You’re right, this shouldn’t be as hard for you as it is. I am so sorry you worked yourself into this terrible panic for absolutely nothing.”

Dante stilled. “What?”

“Maybe it was easy to fall in love with me because I made it that way for you.”

“How?”

“Unintentionally, sure, but I did. Think about it. We progressed. It was going to happen one way or another.”

“Are you saying you—”

“You’re not alone, Dante. I’m only just starting to realize I am so in love with you, too. And for the record, yes, you made it easy.”

Chapter Fourteen

Even after Catrina’s confession, there was a small part of Dante that felt like if he moved or blinked, she was going to bolt.

“You love me,” he heard himself say.

“Yes.
Ti amo
. I won’t tell you every second of the day or call you fifteen times and leave sweet messages on your phone. I just won’t. But I do, so.”

“I don’t need or want you to do those things.”

“Good. Because I am not the kind of woman who needs a man.”

Dante glanced up from his clenched fists to meet Catrina’s gaze. “Then, why are we even having this conversation?”

“I might not need a man but I want one. You, specifically.”

All of Dante’s reservations and the stress keeping his muscles locked tight let go, washing him in some crazy sense of relief, love, fear, and joy. It was an odd combination. These were big changes for both of them. He knew without a doubt it wasn’t going to be sunshine and roses. They had to work to make it work. Simple as that.

“This is hard for me,” Dante admitted quietly. “I feel like I am all over the place and that’s not like me, Cat. You and me, we’re level-headed and focused people. I am nowhere near that right now. How can you be completely unbothered sitting there knowing what you do?”

“I saw you coming and I knew what for,” Catrina murmured. “You were right,
bello
. We fit together perfectly in every other way, so why not this one, too? It’s just love.”

“It’s dangerous.”

“And so are we. If anything, this might make things easier.”

Dante barked out a laugh. “
Dio
, how? With me constantly worrying about you and you rallying against everything I ask?”

“Before our trust was built on the understanding our relationship was simply a partnership, something that gave us mutual benefits and support. Now, that trust has to include our attachment and loyalty. Love owns your loyalties, hopes, and desires. It always will.”

“You make it sound easy.”

“For us, I think it will be. We had to figure it out, that’s all.”

“Love.” 

“Love,” she echoed. “Come to bed. It’s late and we have a ten-month-old to be up with in the morning. I doubt he’ll let us sleep in like we usually do on Saturdays.”

Despite his tormenting thoughts still running like crazy inside his head, Dante didn’t argue with Catrina’s suggestion. He tugged off his clothes and got into bed.

“You’re going to have a new best friend tomorrow,” Dante informed, still watching the ceiling like it might cave in on itself.

“What are you talking about?”

“A guard, or rather, an enforcer. You’re going to have one starting tomorrow. I’ve let you go on without one for long enough. I really don’t want to argue about it,
dolcezza
. I just … don’t have a choice anymore. You have to have one.”

Dante braced for the anger sure to come from Catrina. Surprisingly, it didn’t.

“Because you love me, I need a babysitter?”

“Partly,” Dante replied. “You said it, Cat. You’re not the kind of woman who feels a need to check in. Just because I’m fine with that doesn’t mean I don’t need to know you’re still okay … safe. We can put down some ground rules about business, how far he needs to stay back, and where he shouldn’t follow you in certain places, but for the most part, he will be there in the background.”

“You said partly, Dante. What is the other reason?”

“John. Lucian will demand his son have someone guarding him when he is with us, especially in public. I don’t blame him, really. John is the only small child in the Marcello family currently and he’s a boy. He’s incredibly important and could be perceived as the perfect target by someone looking to hurt us. His safety will always be a priority for me.

“When John is with you, the enforcer will be a lot closer,” Dante warned. “He will act as your driver, for one thing.”

Catrina pulled the sheets higher over her body. “Can we talk about this in the morning?”

“We can talk but we won’t argue,” Dante said.

“I didn’t say I would argue, but the more arrogant you get about the entire thing, the more annoyed I become.”

“Point taken. I’ll shut up about it until tomorrow.”

An annoyed Catrina was not a good Catrina. Her claws tended to come out sharper than ever before. He was pretty damn sure she got off on it, too. Particularly where he was concerned. Tonight had been far too easy.

Turning on her side, Catrina’s hand found the middle of Date’s chest under the sheets. “What’s wrong? You’re tense.”

“I thought I set myself up for failure. I told you this wasn’t what I was expecting.”

“My rejection would have been easier?”

“No, but I was prepared for it.”

“That’s terribly sad, Dante.”

“Tell me about it. My head is a fucking hurricane.”

Catrina grinned as she moved closer in the bed, holding Dante’s stare. Her red lips pressed to his softly, almost like a whisper of a touch. Even being as light as it was, he still felt the kiss find every single nerve in his body.

“Let me slow your crazy mind down,
hmm
?” Catrina hummed, her grin turning sly. Her teeth nipped to Dante’s bottom lip, making pain ricochet off his building desire. Yeah, he was so fucking in love with this woman it was sickening. He didn’t even care. “Then, we can sleep.”

Dante choked on absolutely nothing but his unspoken agreement catching in his throat when Catrina’s hand dipped under his boxer-briefs and squeezed around his semi-hard shaft. His back arched off the bed, a hiss slipping from his lips, as her grip tightened, waking him up. Catrina’s palm was warm silk wrapping him snug, and when her hand slid up to the head of his cock, her fingernail scratched gently along his slit.

A jolt of pleasure shot through Dante like adrenaline had been injected straight to his racing heart. All the air in his lungs left with a whoosh as his jaw clenched and he groaned. She held his cock tight enough for the sensations to boarder a thin line between pain and bliss. An ache—one that felt so fucking good—coursed down his length into his balls.

Catrina always had liked her sex with him a little rough and wild. She didn’t want soft and slow or pretty words and lies whispered in her ear. No, she just wanted him. As hard as he could give it, she would take.

God, Dante needed that right now. To get him out of his fucking head and back into reality, he needed
her
.

“Is that a yes?” Catrina murmured along the line of his jaw, her fingernail rolling over the slit at the head of his cock once more.

“
Cristo
,” Dante cursed. “Yes,
bella
… so many times
yes
.”

Catrina wasted no time pushing the sheets away. Dante tried to grab his wife and bring her closer but she was too fast. Before he knew what happened, Catrina freed his erection from the confines of his boxer-briefs and she was straddling his thighs. Dante couldn’t see Catrina’s face because as she leaned down to take the tip of his dick into the velvet cavern of her mouth, the red veil of her hair created a barrier blocking his vision.

Dante couldn’t have that. While her lips encompassed his shaft, saliva wetting his sensitive skin as her tongue struck against his slit, Dante fisted Catrina’s hair, moving it out of the way. Beautiful, coy hazel eyes met his instantly. Her mouth curved into a wicked smirk as she took his length deeper into her throat. Dante felt his weight sink into the mattress, stress leaving his body with every harsh pant of breath. He grasped at the bed sheet, twisting it in his fist to give him some sense of solid ground.

Catrina’s teeth scraped along the pulsing vein on the underside of his shaft, taking with it his control. A shudder worked its way down Dante’s spine at the sensation. She sucked harder, her cheeks hollowing, and she kept his stare as her fingers wrapped his base. The feeling of her blowing him while she jerked him off was indescribable.

Flicks of her tongue hit against his cock. A hum built in the back of her throat, vibrating the base of his dick in the best way. His grip on her hair tightened, his fist shaking. When her teeth grazed down his length again and her free hand palmed his sac, he knew he was going to lose it.

Dante loved her mouth, no doubt about it. What he wanted more was to be buried so deep inside Catrina when he came that she would feel him there for days.

He tugged on Catrina’s hair, forcing her to release his cock. Her quiet gasp at his harshness was mixed with excitement and shock. Lust darkened her eyes as her teeth cut into her bottom lip. The building pressure in his spine began to subside, but bliss still ravaged his blood.

Dante released the bed sheet and grabbed her jaw with his other hand, his fingers digging into her creamy skin just hard enough to make it pink under the pressure. He forced her head back, keeping her stare locked in his. Catrina sighed at his roughness.

For a moment, Dante simply gazed at his wife, taking her in like she was. Lips reddened from her teeth and still wet from sucking his cock. Hair a mess from his hands. Her silk negligée slipping over her shoulder and wrinkled. There was a tremor in her thighs straddling him, like she was a coil ready to come undone. He knew she was waiting on him.

Catrina watched him, too, silent and still. Those wide eyes made her appear innocent and sweet. It was all lies. Dante knew better—knew
her
.

She was hellish.

From afar, Cat looked tame. As if any man could make her compliant. That was her trick. It was exactly how she caught her prey.

She was a goddamn fiend.

If someone made the mistake of getting too close, she didn’t hesitate to sink her fucking claws straight into their jugular and bleed them dry.

He loved it.

“Fuck, I love you,” Dante growled.

Catrina’s smile bloomed into a promising grin. “
Sempre
?”

“Yeah,
il mia
amore
, always.”

Dante yanked on her hair once more, making Catrina move up his torso. She stretched over him with a feline’s grace, her fingernails scoring across the eagle wings tattooed on his pecs. The action guaranteed her wild side was about to show. His muscles jumped under her touch. He pulled her down for a searing kiss, grabbing her waist to hold her still against his throbbing cock.

“I’m going to fuck you so damned good,” Dante murmured against the seam of her mouth.

Catrina bared her teeth playfully. “I hope so.”

“You’re not a quiet woman.”

“I’m not,” she agreed.

Dante didn’t have to say it for Catrina to catch on. Their nephew was still sleeping in the next room, the walls weren’t particularly thick, and Catrina was a screamer. Dante loved hearing what he did to her like nothing else when fucked her raw, but he did not want to start something only to be interrupted.

“How do you plan to keep me quiet?” Catrina asked.

“I’ll figure something out.”

Dante’s hand skimmed down to where her negligée had ridden up around her thighs. He fisted the fabric, released his grip on her hair, and flipped them over so he was on top and between her thighs. Catrina didn’t have time to react to their new position before Dante started removing her nighty.

He tossed the fabric up above Catrina’s head and started a new trek of exploration over her neck, across her collarbones, and down to her breasts. Dante took her pink nipple into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the taut bud. When he released her breast, he moved further down her toned stomach. Her skin tasted sweet with a hint of saltiness beneath his tongue. Over and over he stuck out to lap at her flesh, taking in her essence. That organic scented lotion she obsessed over made her smell like honeyed strawberries.

Dante’s fingers skimmed under Catrina’s pale yellow lace panties. Just as he knew she would be, her sex was drenched with her arousal. He used his thumbs to spread the lips of her pussy before sinking the digits knuckle deep into her clenching channel. Catrina gasped sharply, her back lifting from the bed.

“
Shhh
,” Dante shushed warningly. “
Cristo
, you’re so fucking wet for me, Cat. What is it that does this for you,
hmm
?”

Catrina whined softly as Dante stroked her inner walls with his thumbs.

“I think I know.” Dante bent his head down and covered her sex with his mouth, letting his tongue lap at the soft material. Her body jerked at the contact. Kissing down to where his thumbs were slowly working her sex to the opposite beat of one another, he murmured, “Sucking my cock gets you off, doesn’t it,
bella
? You love being on your knees and blowing me. It makes you so fucking hot, yeah?”

“Yes,” he heard her hiss.

Dante chuckled, lapping at the tart fluids soaking his thumbs and her panties. “
Dio
, you taste like heaven. Do you want my mouth first or would you rather we get right down to business with my cock?”