Daniel's Gift (19 page)

Alan's face turned grim at her question, and Jenny looked at him inquiringly. "You spoke to him?"

"I saw him."

"Where? Is he in the waiting room? Downstairs?"

"No. He's at the Acapulco Lounge."

Jenny looked at him in confusion. "He didn't know?"

"He knew." Alan shrugged. "I think he's afraid to come down here."

"Why?"

"Because he's a bastard."

"Don't say that. Matt is my brother. He's been there for me in the past. If he's not here, he must have a good reason."

"You make excuses for everybody."

"No, just Danny and Matt. I love them."

"Sometimes love is blind."

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing. I don't want to fight with you. I care about Danny, too." Alan tipped his head to one side. "Your brother, he's a different story. Right now, the person I'm most concerned about is you."

"I appreciate that, Alan. I just wish you could see that Matt has a good side. The last five years have been difficult for him. Can't you cut him some slack?"

Alan ignored her comment. "Are you ready to go?"

Jenny sighed. "In a minute." She turned toward the bed and picked up Danny's hand. She wished his fingers would curl around hers, but they remained limp. During the past forty-eight hours, Jenny had been struck by the feeling that Danny was already gone, that he wasn't in this body that rested so still on the hospital bed. Yet, his heart was still beating.

"I'm going away for a little while," she said to Danny. "I'll be back before you know it. Rest and get better. Dream happy thoughts. I love you so much, honey. I can't lose you. I can't let you go, not even to God or to heaven or to all the angels in the world. You're my baby. You tell them you're not ready, that you have to stay here -- with your mom."

Jenny squeezed Danny's hand and closed her eyes. After a moment, she felt an answering twitch. She opened her eyes and looked down at their entwined hands. It happened again, small, insignificant, barely a whisper of a touch as his first finger tapped against hers.

"Oh, God. Did you see that, Alan? Did you see that? He squeezed my hand."

Alan stared at her without saying a word.

"I felt it. He heard me. I know he heard me."

"I'm sure he did."

"Don't patronize me. You don't believe me, do you?"

"I was watching you, Jenny, watching your hands. I didn't see anything."

"I felt it," she protested. "It happened. How can I leave now?"

"Jenny, don't do this to yourself. You have to leave sometime."

"Why? Why?"

"Because you can't go on living without sleep and food and water. Besides, you told Danny you were leaving. Maybe what you felt was him saying it was okay -- to go."

"You don't even believe his fingers moved."

"Jenny, please."

She cast one last, lingering look at her son. There was no further sign of movement. "All right." She leaned over and kissed Danny on the cheek. "I'll be back soon, buddy. You get better for Mom. Hear me?"

* * *

Danny wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his sweatshirt as he watched his mother leave his hospital room. He didn't want to look at the boy in the bed. It scared him. The boy didn't seem real, even though he knew it was him.

He turned to Jacob with fierce anger. "I want to go back."

"You can't."

"So I
am
dead?"

"No."

"Then what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that you and your mother and father still have things to learn from all this."

"Like what?"

"You'll know when you learn it," Jacob said stubbornly. "And so will they."

"I've already learned the most important thing," Danny replied. "That I want to live, that I want to be with my mom and my dad."

"They're not together -- Danny. Your mother is thinking about marrying Alan. And your father is already married."

"But they belong together. They still love each other, I know they do. My mom saved everything from when they were together -- photographs, a love letter, even a stupid curl of his hair."

"We know she used to love him; that's why she saved those things. But I'm not sure about now."

"Why don't we ask her?" Danny put his hand on Jacob's arm. "Can I talk to her, the way I talk to my dad? There are so many things I want to tell her. I was mean to her on Friday, and I feel so bad. Please, please, let me talk to her. I think she'd feel so much better if she could see me."

Jacob shook his head. "I told you. It ain't allowed. Your parents need to learn different things. Your father must learn to have faith in things that he can't touch or feel, and your mother has to develop strength and courage to fight for what she wants."

Danny put his hands on his hips and shook his head. "I want to talk to someone else."

Jacob laughed. "You want to go over my head, kid? Nobody goes over my head."

"Oh, yeah. Well, I want a different angel then, someone younger, prettier, nicer."

"Lesson number one, Danny boy. You can't have everything you want."

"Now you sound like my mother."

"Who do you think taught her? Patience, kid. Everything in good time." Jacob unfolded his legs from a strange yoga position he had put himself into at the end of Danny's bed. "Let's go into the hallway.

I have a feeling the show's about to start."

"Why?"

"Because Alan and Jenny are about to come face-to-face with your father."

* * *

Luke tapped his foot impatiently as the elevator stopped on yet another floor. At this rate, it would be evening before he saw Jenny again. The elevator began its ascent and thankfully bypassed the next floor to stop at his destination. Finally.

He got off and turned toward ICU, only to come face-to-face with Jenny and a man, a big, strong man who had a possessive arm around Jenny's shoulders.

Luke felt an incredible surge of anger at the simple gesture, at the sight of his woman in another man's arms. Good grief. Was he crazy? Jenny wasn't his woman, hadn't been in over a decade. Still, it bothered him, more than he cared to admit, even to himself.

Jenny stopped when she saw him. The guy looked at him suspiciously. Luke felt as if they were two gun-slingers facing off on Main Street at high noon.

"Luke," she murmured.

The man's grip tightened on Jenny's shoulders.

"I want to see Danny," Luke said.

"Who the hell are you?" the man demanded, stepping in front of Jenny.

"Who's asking?" Luke countered.

"I'm Jenny's fiance, Alan Brady."

"I'm Luke Sheridan, Danny's father."

The world stopped. At least that's the way it felt to Jenny. The two men went as still as statues. Animosity electrified the air.

"You bastard," Alan said with deceptive quiet. "You're responsible for this."

"I'm going to see Danny."

Luke turned to Jenny.

Alan turned to Jenny.

Jenny wanted to run and hide. Better yet, she wanted to wake up from this horrible nightmare that was becoming her reality. She could tell Luke no, but he wouldn't listen. She could say yes, and Alan would be furious. Either way she would lose, and she was just too damn weary to think of another alternative. She swayed on her feet.

Alan, who was standing barely a foot from her, didn't register the movement, but Luke did. He was at her side, his hands strong on her waist as she started to crumple.

What a coward I am, she thought as she was going down. Fainting like some spoiled, pampered woman instead of acting like the tough, single mother she was.

Luke pulled her over to one of the chairs in the corridor. Alan pushed Luke's hands away and put his arm around her. Jenny suddenly felt like a wishbone.

"I can't do this," she muttered. "I'm too tired."

"Come on, Jenny. Let me take you to Merrilee's house where you can rest," Alan said.

Jenny looked up at Luke. "I don't want you to go in there without me."

"Why not?"

"If Danny should wake up -- when he wakes up, I don't want him to be confronted by you, unless we're both there together. It would be confusing."

"He doesn't need to be in there at all," Alan declared, facing Luke. "You gave up your rights before this kid was born. Jenny told me what happened. What in the hell right do you have to come here now and intrude into this family?"

"I'm Danny's father. I'd say that gives me more rights than you."

Alan stood up. Luke stood up. Jenny sighed. Her moment as damsel in distress was over. She got to her feet. "I'm going to my sister's house to rest for a few hours. I will be back here by five, Luke. I'd appreciate it if you would wait until then before you see Danny."

Luke stared at her for a long moment. Finally, he nodded. "All right. I'll do as you wish."

"Thank you." She slipped her arm through Alan's. "Let's go."

* * *

Danny looked over at Jacob. "My dad doesn't like Alan either."

"The cop's a good dude."

"He's a dweeb. I drive him crazy."

Jacob laughed. "On purpose, kid."

Danny grinned. "Yeah, maybe. He's no good for my mom. She doesn't smile when she's with him. And Alan hates the beach. Can you imagine living in Half Moon Bay and hating the beach? I bet my dad likes the beach."

"Your dad spends all his time at work making money."

"And making drugs to help people," Danny said defensively.

"You like him, don't you?"

"I -- I want to," Danny said slowly. "I'm not sure yet. I mean I can't forget that he lives in that huge house that's five times the size of my mom's house. She's had to do everything all these years, because he didn't want me."

"But you still think you might want him as a dad?"

"He is my dad. And he did come to the hospital. Now that he knows about me, he wants to be with me. That should count for something."

"Okay, we'll give him a chance then."

"What does that mean?"

"It means I'm tired of this hospital. Let's have some fun."

Danny's eyes widened. "Fun? Like what?"

"Ever wondered what it feels like to fly like a bird?"

"No."

"Then it's about time you did."

Danny felt himself being lifted. Jacob pulled back the ceiling like it was a skylight, and suddenly they were surrounded by nothing but blue. Danny held on to Jacob's arms as they started to fly.

"This is actually cool," he shouted with some amazement. "Can I do it by myself?"

"Give it a try."

Danny let go of Jacob's arms and started to free-fall. He flapped his arms in wild abandon, feeling like a cross between a bird and a very heavy elephant. "I can't do it," he said in panic.

"Just believe in yourself, Danny boy."

"Okay," Danny said doubtfully. "I'll try. I can do it. I can do it."

He flapped his arms, kicked his feet, and repeated the words over and over again, feeling more like the "little engine that could" than an angel.

Finally, Danny started to take control of his actions. In fact, when he slowed the movement of his arms, he could actually feel the air around him. As his anxiety eased, everything became clearer. He felt like a bird, wild and free.

After a few moments, he began to try out new things, flying low and kicking at the branches on the tallest tips of the trees, disturbing a bird's nest, scattering a group of sparrows with a shrill whistle.

Jacob vanished from view, and Danny felt suddenly alone and afraid -- again. What was he doing? Would this be his world forever -- caught in a place between life and death with only Jacob to talk to?

Danny missed his mother, missed Christopher, missed Uncle Matt, and even his nerdy cousins, William and Constance, although Constance was a definite pain, and Aunt Merrilee was right up there with the Wicked Witch of the East. Uncle Richard wasn't bad, not around much though. Danny barely knew his grandfather. John St. Claire didn't have time for them, and when he did speak, it was usually to criticize.

Still and all, they were his family, and it was sad to think that he might never see them again, might never feel his mother's arms around his body, smell her perfume, laugh at her stupid lullabies.

Actually, he didn't mind hearing her sing. He just couldn't tell her that, because it was definitely not cool.

Danny's heart felt heavy. It might be too late to tell his mother anything ever again. Had he told her he loved her before he left for school on Friday? No, he had been mad because she didn't want him to see Luke. He had just walked out on her. If only he could go back and tell her he loved her. If only he could turn back time and do Friday completely differently.

Suddenly, Danny looked up and the ground was inches away. He landed with a thump in a rosebush, his legs tangled in the vines. Even though his skin didn't show a scratch, he felt a tingling of pain where the thorns touched his flesh. He looked up and saw Jacob sitting in a swing that was attached to nothing, going up and down and all the way around, laughing like a boy instead of the old, ornery man that he was.