Authors: Shelli Stevens
“He only had eyes for you on Monday night. Are you sure he sees it in the same light?”
“It doesn’t matter anymore.” She gave a weary shrug.
“Madison, we need to talk about something that happened awhile ago. Something that—”
“Here’s your tea, darling.” Her mother entered the room carrying a cup of tea in a Tinkerbell mug, and a few saltine crackers.
Eric’s expression turned frustrated and he stood, walking back to the window. Obviously he wasn’t about to keep up this conversation with their mother in the room.
“Did you know that you’re out of food?” her mother asked. “I swear that tea must be as old as you are, and I had to fight off a mouse for those crackers.”
That finally pulled a smile from Madison. “Funny, Mom. I plan on going to the store sometime soon.”
Her mother laced her hands together and glanced down at her daughter, biting her lip. “Actually, Madison, I’ve been speaking to your father in the other room. We were thinking that it might be best if you came to stay with us for a while.”
Madison made a noise of surprise, and thought about the offer. The last place she wanted to stay was in this apartment. She couldn’t look around without reliving it all. Maybe going back to her parents’ home wouldn’t be such a bad thing until she could find another place.
“All right. I’ll come home.”
“Wonderful. When you finish up with your tea, we’ll take you over to Dr. Burton and have him look at your foot.”
Madison lifted the tea and took a tentative sip, then set it down resolutely.
“Let’s just go now. I can’t stay here any longer.”
Gabe gripped the remote control in his hand, staring at the television that had started showing the evening news. The death of the Espresso Bandit was the top story. When they flashed Maddie’s picture across the screen, he hurled the remote to the wall in frustration. He didn’t care that it broke open and fell to the ground in pieces.
Damn it, he should be with her right now. He grabbed his cell phone and punched in Eric’s number.
“Hey, Gabe,” Eric answered wearily.
“Eric. How is she?”
“She’s getting her ankle plastered. It was broken in the struggle.”
Gabe took a deep breath. God, he would have done anything to spare her this.
“Is she…is she asking for me?”
Eric didn’t respond for a few seconds. “You know that I’ll call you as soon as she does.”
His gut twisted and he felt a bit sick. She hadn’t yet asked for him. The words were unspoken and unneeded. If she hadn’t asked for him by now, she probably wouldn’t. The fragile trust they’d established over the last week and a half had snapped. It was totally gone.
“Gabe, you there?”
“I’m here.”
“Look, don’t take it personally. Give her some time,” Eric advised. “If you haven’t heard from her in a week, why don’t you drop by my parents’ house? She’ll be staying with them.”
The end of the week sounded like an impossible amount of time to wait. But he knew he would wait however long it took. He’d do anything to get her back.
“Fine. Thanks, Eric.”
“No problem.”
Gabe disconnected the call and stared at the television again. The newscasters had already moved on to the weather.
He got off the couch and went to find his keys. Just sitting around was driving him crazy—he needed to do something. Working out had always been a good distraction before; maybe it would do the same now. Somehow he doubted it, though.
Sunday afternoon, Madison sat at a table on the balcony of her parents’ house, drinking coffee and taking in the sunshine. The
Seattle Times
sat untouched next to her. She stared at the view of Seattle, trying not to think about what had happened almost a week ago.
The reporters hadn’t stopped calling, asking for interviews. She still had no desire to grant one. It was all too fresh, the wound too raw.
The quietness of the morning suited her. She’d been left alone in the house, since her parents had gone to attend an early morning church service. But she wouldn’t be alone for long. Eric had promised to drop by later with Lannie.
As if her thoughts had summoned them sooner, she heard the electric gate to their house closing. Madison took another sip of coffee and waited for them to find her.
Five minutes later, she nearly dropped her mug when Gabe walked out onto the balcony.
She stood quickly, setting the mug down with shaking hands.
“How did you get in here?”
Gabe lifted a brow and gave her a sardonic look. “Through the front gate. Your folks haven’t changed the code recently.”
Madison wondered briefly what was in the large envelope he carried, and glanced down at the table.
Oh God, it’s too soon. I can’t face him yet.
She took a deep breath and counted to ten.
Get some control, Maddie. Don’t look like a terrified, weak woman.
Lifting her head, she felt the calm descend upon her.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Gabe knew the moment she put up the wall. The raw reaction in her eyes had disappeared, being replaced by something less vulnerable.
He let his gaze travel over her, noting that once again she was dressed in clothes that likely cost more than his paycheck. The only exception was her lack of designer heels. The cast was a deterrent, and instead she wore a sequined flip-flop on the uninjured foot.
“What brings you by, Gabe?” She gave him a polite smile as she gestured to the empty seat next to hers. “And why don’t you sit down?”
What brought him by? Was she kidding? Gabe sat, never taking his gaze off her.
“Can I get you something to drink?” She started to hobble toward the door. “Some water? Soda?”
“Sit down, Maddie,” Gabe said, more sharply than he’d intended. “I’m not here for a beverage.”
She sank back down in her seat and picked up her own coffee. “Okay, I’ll ask again. What are you here for, Gabe?”
“We need to talk about things. The most important thing being our relationship.”
Something flickered in her gaze, before she lowered her lashes. “Do we have a relationship? Last I understood, we weren’t putting any labels on it.”
“You know damn well we did, whether we put a fucking label on it or not.”
“Actually.” Madison crossed her legs and her skirt rose up an inch, exposing her smooth thigh. “I’m not so sure. I’ve been going over a few things in my head…and I’m wondering if maybe I mistook what we had for something else.”
Not liking her tone, Gabe jerked his gaze from her thighs and met her uncertain gaze.
“I have a theory. One that came to me after I had to save myself on Tuesday.” She took a deep breath. “You see, in the short time that we were together, I came to see you as my protector. Someone who would always be there for me.”
“I wanted to be, Maddie. You know I would have given anything—”
“I know, Gabe. But let me finish. Things just got crazy that day, and suddenly I had to save myself.”
She might has well have been throwing knives, for her words couldn’t have hurt more. He swallowed against the rawness in his throat. “I made a mistake, Maddie. I tried to get back to you in time. I brought half the damn force—”
“I know you did, Gabe.” She held up a hand to stop him. “And I’m not blaming you. Really, I’m not.”
“Aren’t you? It sure as hell sounds like it. But, please, go on.” His jaw worked with frustration. Morbid curiosity was the only thing that made him want to hear what she had to say next.
“I’m just not sure that what we had was more than…was more than a little hero worship combined with good old-fashioned lust.”
He blinked, his stomach clenching. She couldn’t believe that. Not anymore than he did.
His voice was harsh. “Bullshit. You’re just afraid.”
“I’m afraid?” Panic and doubt flared in her gaze. Then anger darkened her eyes, and her mouth grew tight. “Afraid is what I was the day someone tried to kill me. I’ve already experienced the most terrifying thing a person can go through. Why would I be afraid of sex?”
“It’s not about sex, Maddie.”
“Isn’t it? And look, you don’t need to worry about me being pregnant. I took a test and I’m not.” She stood and he could see the way her hands trembled. “I don’t think we should talk about this anymore. Maybe you should just see yourself out.”
Gabe stood and grasped her elbow and swung her around into his arms.
“
Stop
. This won’t solve anything.” She attempted to push him away, but he’d already lowered his mouth to hers.
She struggled for only a second before her body yielded to his. Her soft moan was all it took to undo him. He placed his hands around her waist and lifted her easily onto the table, not even breaking the kiss for a moment. Madison unfastened his shirt and had her fingers inside it, stroking over his chest.
He groaned, unable to suppress the quiver that ran through him. God, it felt so good to have her back in his arms. To have her not fight him. And even if for only a moment, to have her not hate him.
He spread her thighs and stepped between them, pulling her shirt off and dragging her bra down off her breasts.
“Someone might see us,” she protested weakly, covering herself.
Gabe gently grasped her wrists and pulled them away from her breasts. “Nobody can see onto your porch—the angle’s not right.”
He closed his mouth around one of her nipples, loving the choked sound she made. Her fingers jerked in his hair, holding his head to her breast. He suckled on her gently and moved one hand under her skirt. Reaching the thin cotton barrier of her panties, he massaged one finger against the fabric and into her wet warmth.
Madison groaned and grabbed at his shoulder.
“I’ve got to taste you again,” Gabe muttered, dropping to his knees. “Remind myself you’re alive.”
He pulled her forward to the edge of the table and lowered his mouth to the cotton of her panties. He licked and sucked through the fabric, teased by the musky scent and hint of moisture. His tongue stroked over her cleft, causing her panties to sink further in, and they immediately became soaked.
He needed more. Gabe hooked his fingers under the waistband of her panties and slid them down her legs and off.
The sight of her plump, wet folds was so erotic his cock went rock hard.
Placing a thumb on each side of her lips, he parted her and blew gently on the moisture inside. He pushed a finger into her tight channel and then retreated, using the slippery moisture to stroke over her clitoris.
“Gabe…” She moaned and her legs fell open even further.
He toyed with her clit, watching as it swelled under his touch. He leaned forward, pressing his face into her again and licked up and into her cleft.
Madison jerked against him, but he held her still, dipping his tongue again and again into her slippery channel. He dragged it back to her clit to circle and flick against it before finally sucking the swollen bud into his mouth.
Gabe heard her guttural groan and answered by pushing two fingers inside her, penetrating her while he brought her to a climax in his mouth.
With her thighs still shaking from the orgasm, he stood and kissed the side of her neck. He let his gaze meet her passion-clouded eyes.
“Maddie,” he murmured, stroking her cheek. “I’ve missed you,
mi vida
. Don’t you see how wrong it is to try to fight this?”
The tiny smile on Madison’s face slipped and she closed her eyes. “Oh, Gabe…I want you in my bed, obviously I do. But as for more than that? I’m just not sure.”
Her words were like a bucket of cold water on his desire for her. He released her so abruptly she had to grab the table to keep from falling.
“Fine, Madison. Have it your way. But I won’t be just some guy you fuck when you’re horny.”
She winced, already pulling her clothes back on. “Gabe, wait. That came out wrong. I just need more time to think about things.”
“At least have the decency to be straight with me,” he ground out. “This goes beyond the relationship label. You aren’t ready to forgive me for what happened Tuesday. I broke your trust and now you’re afraid. I’m sorry I let you down, Maddie. But I’m human.”
“Gabe—”
“I wish I could’ve been the knight in shining armor you wanted me to be. But I wasn’t. And now, unfortunately, I’ll never measure up to the kind of perfection you expect.”
He turned and strode back into the house, leaving her alone on the balcony, so blinded by his emotions that he almost rammed into Eric, who walked down the hallway.
“Gabe,” Eric put a hand out to steady him. “Did you come to see Madison?”
“Yeah, and now I’m leaving.”
Eric held fast to Gabe’s arm, refusing to let him walk away.
“I told you to give her a week.” Eric’s gaze softened with sympathy.
Gabe issued a harsh laugh. “Somehow, I doubt two more days would’ve made much of a difference. Let me pass, Eric. I don’t want to stick around where I’m not wanted.”
“All right,” Eric released him with obvious reluctance. “I still think she just needs time.”
“It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“She cares about you.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Hey, hold on a second.” Eric again stopped him as he went to move past. “Don’t forget the rehearsal dinner on Friday night.”
“I’m leaving town for the week, and I’m turning off my phone. But I’ll be there Friday,” Gabe promised, and walked out of the house.
Madison hadn’t stopped shaking when her brother came out on the porch a few minutes later.
“So, that’s it then?” Eric pulled out a chair and sat across from her. “You’re just going to write him off?”
Her stomach clenched and she averted her gaze to the view. “I don’t know, Eric. I’m so screwed up emotionally right now.”
“It wasn’t his fault.”
“I know it wasn’t.”
“Do you? Deny it all you want, but it sure seems like you’re blaming him.”
“Fine. You know what? Maybe I am.” She squeezed her eyes shut, frustration making her voice louder. “I’m tired of it all. My entire life you guys have shielded me, protected me to the point where I felt smothered. But when it came down to it, no one could keep me safe. I still had to save my own ass in the end.” She threw her hands up in the air. “And you know? I’m done. I don’t want to be dependent on anyone, anymore.”