Dangerous Days: (41 page)

“I just want you to know,” she said, “that I am still interested in you, even if it isn’t going to be anything else. And that I am ridiculously proud of you. Isn’t it queer to look back on last Winter and think what a lot of careless idiots we were? I suppose war doesn’t really change us, but it does make us wonder what we’ve got in us. I am surprised to find that I am a great deal better than I ever thought I was!”

There was comfort in the letter, but no thrill. He was far away from all that now, like one on the first stage of a long journey, with his eyes ahead.

Then one day he saw a familiar but yet strange figure striding along the country road. Graham was map-sketching that day, and the strange but familiar figure was almost on him when he looked up. It was extremely military, and looked like a general at least. Also it was very red in the face, and was clutching doggedly in its teeth an old briar pipe. But what had appeared from the front to be an ultra military figure on closer inspection turned out to be a procession. Pulling back hard on a rope behind was the company goat, Elinor.

The ultra-military figure paused by Graham’s sketching-stool, and said, “Young man, do you know where this creature belongs? I found her trying to commit suicide on the rifle range - why, Graham!”

It was Doctor Haverford. He grew a trifle less military then, and borrowed some pipe tobacco. He looked oddly younger, Graham thought, and rather self-conscious of his uniform.

“Every inch a soldier, Graham,” he chuckled. “Still have to use a hook and eye at the bottom of the coat - blouse,” he corrected himself. “But I’m getting my waist-line again. How’s the - whoa!” he called, as Elinor wrapped the rope around his carefully putted legs. “Infernal animal!” he grumbled. “I just paid a quarter to have these puttees shined. How’s the family?”

“Mother has gone to Linndale. The house is finished. Have you been here long, sir?”

“Two weeks. Hang it all, Graham, I wish I’d let this creature commit suicide. She’s - do you know Delight is here?”

“Here? Why, no.”

“At the hostess house,” said the chaplain, proudly. “Doing her bit, too. Mrs. Haverford wanted to come too, and sew buttons on, or something. But I told her two out of three was a fair percentage. I hear that Washington has sent for your father.

“I hadn’t heard.”

“He’s a big man, Graham. We’re going to hear from him. Only - I thought he looked tired when I saw him last. Somebody ought to look after him a bit.” He was patiently untangling himself from Elinor’s rope. “You know there are two kinds of people in the world: those who look after themselves and those who look after others. That’s your father - the last.”

Graham’s face clouded. How true that was! He knew now, as he had not known before. He was thinking clearly those days. Hard work and nothing to drink had clarified his mind, and he saw things at home as they really were. Clayton’s infinite patience, his strength and his gentleness. But he only said:

“He has had a hard year.” He raised his eyes and looked at the chaplain. “I didn’t help him any, you know, sir.”

“Well, well, that’s all over now. We’ve just one thing to think of, and that’s to beat those German devils back to Berlin. And then burn Berlin,” he added, militantly.

The last Graham saw of him, he was dragging Elinor down the road, and a faint throaty humming came back, which sounded suspiciously like “Where do we go from here, boys? Where do we go from here?”

Candidate Spencer took great pains with his toilet that afternoon. He polished his shoes, and shaved, and he spent a half hour on some ten sadly neglected fingernails. At retreat he stood at attention in the long line, and watched the flag moving slowly and majestically to the stirring bugle notes. Something swelled almost to bursting in his throat. That was his flag. He was going to fight for it. And after that was done he was going to find some girl, some nice girl - the sort, for instance, that would leave her home to work in a hostess house. And having found her, he would marry her, and love and cherish her all his life. Unless, of course, she wouldn’t have him. He was inclined to think she wouldn’t.

He ate very little supper that night, little being a comparative term, of course. And then he went to discover Delight. It appeared, however, that she had been already discovered. She was entirely surrounded by uniforms, and Graham furiously counted a colonel, two majors, and a captain.

“Pulling rank, of course!” he muttered, and retired to a corner, where he had at least the mild gratification of seeing that even the colonel could not keep Delight from her work.

“Silly asses!” said Graham, again, and then she saw him. There was no question about her being pleased. She was quite flushed with it, but a little uncomfortable, too, at Graham’s attitude. He was oddly humble, and yet he had a look of determination that was almost grim. She filled in a rather disquieting silence by trying to let him know, without revealing that she had ever been anything else, how proud she was of him. Then she realized that he was not listening, and that he was looking at her with an almost painful intensity.

“When can you get away, Delight?” he asked abruptly.

“From here?” She cast an appraising glance over the room. “Right away, I think. Why?”

“Because I want to talk to you, and I can’t talk to you here.”

She brought a bright colored sweater and he helped her into it, still with his mouth set and his eyes a trifle sunken. All about there were laughing groups of men in uniform. Outside, the parade glowed faintly in the dusk, and from the low barrack windows there came the glow of lights, the movement of young figures, voices, the thin metallic notes of a mandolin.

“How strange it all is,” Delight said. “Here we are, you and father and myself - and even Jackson. I saw him to-day. All here, living different lives, doing different things, even thinking different thoughts. It’s as though we had all moved into a different world.”

He walked on beside her, absorbed in his own thoughts, which were yet only of her.

“I didn’t know you were here,” he brought out finally.

“That’s because you’ve been burying yourself. I knew you were here.”

“Why didn’t you send me some word?”

She stiffened somewhat in the darkness.

“I didn’t think you would be greatly interested, Graham.”

And again, struggling with his new humility, he was silent. It was not until they had crossed the parade ground and were beyond the noises of the barracks that he spoke again.

“Do you mind if I talk to you, Delight? I mean, about myself? I - since you’re here, we’re likely to see each other now and then, if you are willing. And I’d like to start straight.”

“Do you really want to tell me?”

“No. But I’ve got to. That’s all.”

He told her. He made no case for himself. Indeed, some of it Delight understood far better than he did himself. He said nothing against Marion; on the contrary, he blamed himself rather severely. And behind his honest, halting sentences, Delight read his own lack of understanding. She felt infinitely older than this tall, honest-eyed boy in his stained uniform - older and more sophisticated. But if she had understood the Marion Hayden situation, she was totally at a loss as to Anna.

“But I don’t understand!” she cried. “How could you make love to her if you didn’t love her?”

“I don’t know. Fellows do those things. It’s just mischief - some sort of a devil in them, I suppose.”

When he reached the beating and Anna’s flight, however, she understood a little better.

“Of course you had to stand by her,” she agreed.

“You haven’t heard it all,” he said quietly. “When I’m through, if you get up and leave me, I’ll understand, Delight, and I won’t blame you.”

He told her the rest of the story in a voice strained with anxiety. It was as though he had come to a tribunal for judgment. He spared her nothing, the dinner at the roadhouse with Rudolph at the window, his visit to Anna’s room, and her subsequent disappearance.

“She told the Department of Justice people that Rudolph found her that night, and, took her home. She was a prisoner then, poor little kid. But she overheard her father and Rudolph plotting to blow up the mill. That’s where I came in, Delight. He was crazy at me. He was a German, of course, and he might have done it anyhow. But Rudolph told him a lot of lies about me, and - he did it. When I think about it all, and about Joey, I’m crazy.”

She slipped her hand over his.

“Of course they would have done it anyhow,” she said softly.

“You aren’t going to get up and go away?”

“Why should I?” she asked. “I only feel - oh, Graham, how wretched you must have been.”

Something in her voice made him sit up straighter. He knew now that it had always been Delight, always. Only she had been too good for him. She had set a standard he had not hoped to reach. But now things were different. He hadn’t amounted to much in other things, but he was a soldier now. He meant to be a mighty good soldier. And when he got his commission -

“You won’t mind, then, if I come in to see you now and then?”

“Mind? Why, Graham!”

“And you don’t think I’m quite hopeless, do you?”

There were tears in her eyes, but she answered bravely:

“I believe in you every minute. But then I think I always have.”

“Like fun you have!” But although he laughed, it was a shaky laugh. Suddenly he stood up and shook himself. He felt young and strong and extremely happy. There had been a bad time, but it was behind him now. Ahead there lay high adventure, and here, beside him in the dusk, was the girl of his heart. She believed in him. Work to do and a woman who believed in a fellow - that was life.

“Aren’t you cold?” he asked, and drew the gaudy sweater tenderly around her shoulders.

The fact that Audrey Valentine, conspicuous member of a conspicuous social group that she was, had been working in the machine-shop of the Spencer munitions works at the time of the explosion was in itself sufficient to rouse the greatest interest. When a young reporter, gathering human-interest stories about the event from the pitiful wreckage in the hospitals, happened on Clare Gould, he got a feature-story for the Sunday edition that made Audrey’s own world, reading it in bed or over its exquisite breakfast-tables, gasp with amazement.

For, following up Clare’s story, he found that Audrey had done much more than run toward the telephone. She had reached it, had found the operator gone, and had succeeded, before the roof fell in on her, in calling the fire department and in sending in a general alarm to all the hospitals.

The reporter found the night operator who had received the message. He got a photograph of her, too, and, from the society file, an old one of Audrey, very delicate and audacious, and not greatly resembling the young woman who lay in her bed and read the article aloud, between dismay and laughter, to old Terry Mackenzie.

“Good heavens, Terry,” she said. “Listen! ‘I had heard the explosion, but did not of course know what it was. And then I got a signal, and it was the Spencer plant. A sweet Southern voice said, very calmly, “Operator, this is important. Listen carefully. There has been an explosion at the Spencer plant and the ruins are on fire. There will probably be more explosions in a minute. Send in a general fire-alarm, and then get all the ambulances and doctors - ” Then there was another explosion, and their lines went out of commission. I am glad she is not dead. She certainly had her nerve.’”

“Fame at last, Audrey!” said old Terry, very gently.

“It’s shameless!” But she was a little pleased, nevertheless. Not at the publicity. That was familiar enough. But that, when her big moment came, she had met it squarely.

Terry was striding about the room. His visits were always rather cyclonic. He moved from chair to chair, leaving about each one an encircling ring of cigaret ashes, and carefully inspecting each new vase of flowers. He stopped in front of a basket of exquisite small orchids.

“Who sent this?” he demanded.

“Rodney Page. Doesn’t it look like him?”

He turned and stared at her.

“What’s come over Clayton Spencer? Is he blind?”

“Blind?”

“About Rodney. He’s head over heels in love with Natalie Spencer, God alone knows why.”

“I daresay it isn’t serious. He is always in love with somebody.”

“There’s a good bit of talk. I don’t give a hang for either of them, but I’m fond of Clayton. So are you. Natalie’s out in the country now, and Rodney is there every week-end. It’s a scandal, that’s all. As for Natalie herself, she ought to be interned as a dangerous pacifist. She’s a martyr, in her own eyes. Thank heaven there aren’t many like her.”

Audrey leaned back against her pillows.

“I wonder, Terry,” she said, “if you haven’t shown me what to do next. I might be able to reach some of the women like Natalie. There are some of them, and they’ve got to learn that if they don’t stand behind the men, we’re lost.”

“Fine!” he agreed. “Get ‘em to knit less and write more letters, cheerful letters. Tell ‘em to remember that by the time their man gets the letter the baby’s tooth will be through. There are a good many men in the army-camps to-day vicariously cutting teeth. Get after ‘em, Audrey! A worried man is a poor soldier.”

After he had gone, she had the nurse bring her paper and pencil, and she wrote, rather incoherently, it is true, her first appeal to the women of the country. It was effective, too. Audrey was an effective person. When Clayton came for his daily visit she had just finished it, and was reading it over with considerable complacency.

“I’ve become an author, Clay,” she said, “I think myself I’m terribly good at it. May I read it to you?”

He listened gravely, but with a little flicker of amusement in his eyes. How like her it was, to refuse to allow herself even time to get entirely well! But when she finished he was thoughtful. She had called it “Slacker Women.” That was what Natalie was; he had never put it into words before. Natalie was a slacker.

He had never discussed Natalie’s attitude toward the war with Audrey. He rather thought she was entirely ignorant of it. But her little article, glowing with patriotism, frank, simple, and convincing, might have been written to Natalie herself.