Dangerous Days: (27 page)

Katie had an afternoon off that Sunday. When she came back that night, Herman, weary from the late hours of Saturday, was already snoring in his bed. Anna met Katie at her door and drew her in.

“I’ve found a nice room,” Katie whispered. “Here’s the address written down. The street cars go past it. Three dollars a week. Are you ready?”

Anna was ready, even to her hat. Over it she placed a dark veil, for she was badly disfigured. Then, with Katie crying quietly, she left the house. In the flare from the Spencer furnaces Katie watched until the girl reappeared on the twisting street below which still followed the old path - that path where Herman, years ago, had climbed through the first spring wild flowers to the cottage on the hill.

Graham was uncomfortable the next morning on his way to the mill. Anna’s face had haunted him. But out of all his confusion one thing stood out with distinctness. If he was to be allowed to marry Marion, he must have no other entanglement. He would go to her clean and clear.

So he went to the office, armed toward Anna with a hardness he was far from feeling.

“Poor little kid!” he reflected on the way down. “Rotten luck, all round.”

He did not for a moment believe that it would be a lasting grief. He knew that sort of girl, he reflected, out of his vast experience of twenty-two. They were sentimental, but they loved and forgot easily. He hoped she would forget him; but even with that, there was a vague resentment that she should do so.

“She’ll marry some mill-hand,” he reflected, “and wear a boudoir cap, and have a lot of children who need their noses wiped.”

But he was uncomfortable.

Anna was not in her office. Her coat and hat were not there. He was surprised, somewhat relieved. It was out of his hands, then; she had gone somewhere else to work. Well, she was a good stenographer. Somebody was having a piece of luck.

Clayton, finding him shorthanded, sent Joey over to help him pack up his office belongings, the fittings of his desk, his personal papers, the Japanese prints and rugs Natalie had sent after her single visit to the boy’s new working quarters. And, when Graham came back from luncheon, Joey had a message for him.

“Telephone call for you, Mr. Spencer.”

“What was it?”

“Lady called up, from a pay phone. She left her number and said she’d wait.” Joey lowered his voice confidentially. “Sounded like Miss Klein,” he volunteered.

He was extremely resentful when Graham sent him away on an errand. And Graham himself frowned as he called the number on the pad. It was like a girl, this breaking off clean and then telephoning, instead of letting the thing go, once and for all. But his face changed as he heard Anna’s brief story over the wire.

“Of course I’ll come,” he said. “I’m pretty busy, but I can steal a half-hour. Don’t you worry. We’ll fix it up some way.”

He was more concerned than deeply anxious when he rang off. It was unfortunate, that was all. And the father was a German swine, and ought to be beaten himself. To think that his Christmas gift had brought her to such a pass! A leather strap! God!

He was vaguely uneasy, however. He had a sense of a situation being forced on him. He knew, too, that Clayton was waiting for him at the new plant. But Anna’s trouble, absurd as its cause seemed to him, was his responsibility.

It ceased to be absurd, however, when he saw her discolored features. It would be some time before she could even look for another situation. Her face was a swollen mask, and since such attraction as she had had for him had been due to a sort of evanescent prettiness of youth, he felt a repulsion that he tried his best to conceal.

“You poor little thing!” he said. “He’s a brute. I’d like - ” He clenched his fists. “Well, I got you into it. I’m certainly going to see you through.”

She had lowered her veil quickly, and he felt easier. The telephone booth was in the corner of a quiet hotel, and they were alone. He patted her shoulder.

“I’ll see you through,” he repeated. “Don’t you worry about anything. Just lie low.”

“See me through? How?”

“I can give you money; that’s the least I can do. Until you are able to work again.” And as she drew away, “We’ll call it a loan, if that makes you feel better. You haven’t anything, have you?”

“He has everything I’ve earned.. I’ve never had a penny except carfare.”

“Poor little girl!” he said again.

She was still weak, he saw, and he led her into the deserted cafe. He took a highball himself, not because he wanted it, but because she refused to drink, at first. He had never before had a drink in the morning, and he felt a warm and reckless glow to his very fingertips. Bending toward her, while the waiter’s back was turned, he kissed her marred and swollen cheek.

“To think I have brought you all this trouble!”

“You mustn’t blame yourself.”

“I do. But I’ll make it up to you, Anna. Yon don’t hate me for it, do you?”

“Hate you! You know better than that.”

“I’ll come round to take you out now and then, in the evenings. I don’t want you to sit alone in that forsaken boarding-house and mope.” He drew out a bill-fold, and extracted some notes. “Don’t be silly,” he protested, as she drew back. “It’s the only way I can get back my self-respect. You owe it to me to let me do it.”

She was not hard to persuade. Anything was better than going back to the cottage on the hill, and to that heavy brooding figure, and the strap on the wall. But the taking of the money marked a new epoch in the girl’s infatuation. It bought her. She did not know it, nor did he. But hitherto she had been her own, earning her own livelihood. What she gave of love, of small caresses and intimacies, had been free gifts.

From that time she was his creature. In her creed, which was the creed of the girls on the hill, one did not receive without giving. She would pay him back, but all that she had to give was herself.

“You’ll come to see me, too. Won’t you?”

The tingling was very noticeable now. He felt warm, and young, and very, very strong.

“Of course I’ll come to see you,” he said, recklessly. “You take a little time off - you’ve worked hard - and we’ll play round together.”

She bent down, unexpectedly, and put her bruised cheek against his hand, as it lay on the table.

“I love you dreadfully,” she whispered.

February and March were peaceful months, on the surface. Washington was taking stock quietly of national resources and watching for Germany’s next move. The winter impasse in Europe gave way to the first fighting of spring, raids and sorties mostly, since the ground was still too heavy for the advancement of artillery. On the high seas the reign of terror was in full swing, and little tragic echoes of the world drama began again to come by cable across the Atlantic. Some of Graham’s friends, like poor Chris, found the end of the path of glory. The tall young Canadian Highlander died before Peronne in March. Denis Nolan’s nephew was killed in the Irish Fusileers.

One day Clayton came home to find a white-faced Buckham taking his overcoat in the hall, and to learn that he had lost a young brother.

Clayton was uncomfortable at dinner that night. He wondered what Buckham thought of them, sitting there around the opulent table, in that luxurious room. Did he resent it? After dinner he asked him if he cared to take a few days off, but the old butler shook his head.

“I’m glad to have my work to keep me busy, sir,” he said. “And anyhow, in England, it’s considered best to go on, quite as though nothing had happened. It’s better for the troops, sir.”

There was a new softness and tolerance in Clayton that early spring. He had mellowed, somehow, a mellowing that had nothing to do with his new prosperity. In past times he had wondered how he would stand financial success if it ever came. He had felt fairly sure he could stand the other thing. But success - Now he found that it only increased his sense of responsibility. He was, outside of the war situation, as nearly happy as he had been in years. Natalie’s petulant moods, when they came, no longer annoyed him. He was supported, had he only known it, by the strong inner life he was living, a life that centered about his weekly meetings with Audrey.

Audrey gave him courage to go on. He left their comradely hours together better and stronger. All the week centered about that one hour, out of seven days, when he stood on her hearth-rug, or lay back in a deep chair, listening or talking - such talk as Natalie might have heard without resentment.

Some times he felt that that one hour was all he wanted; it carried so far, helped so greatly. He was so boyishly content in it. And then she would make a gesture, or there would be, for a second, a deeper note in her voice, and the mad instinct to catch her to him was almost overwhelming.

Some times he wondered if she were not very lonely, not knowing that she, too, lived for days on that one hour. She was not going out, because of Chris’s death, and he knew there were long hours when she sat alone, struggling determinedly with the socks she was knitting.

Only once did they tread on dangerous ground, and that was on her birthday. He stopped in a jeweler’s on his way up-town and brought her a black pearl on a thin almost invisible chain, only to have her refuse to take it.

“I can’t Clay!”

“Why not?”

“It’s too valuable. I can’t take valuable presents from men.”

“It’s value hasn’t anything to do with it.”

“I’m not wearing jewelry, anyhow.”

“Audrey,” he said gravely, “it isn’t the pearl. It isn’t its value. That’s absurd. Don’t you understand that I would like to think that you have something I have given you?”

When she sat still, thinking over what he had said, he slipped the chain around her neck and clasped it. Then he stooped down, very gravely, and kissed her.

“For my silent partner!” he said.

In all those weeks, that was the only time he had kissed her. He knew quite well the edge of the gulf they stood on, and he was determined not to put the burden of denial on her. He felt a real contempt for men who left the strength of refusal to a woman, who pleaded, knowing that the woman’s strength would save them from themselves, and that if she weakened, the responsibility was hers.

So he fed on the husks of love, and was, if not happy, happier.

Graham, too, was getting on better. For one thing, Anna Klein had been ill. She lay in her boarding-house, frightened at every step on the stairs, and slowly recovered from a low fever. Graham had not seen her, but he sent her money for a doctor, for medicines, for her room rent, enclosed in brief letters, purely friendly and interested. But she kept them under her pillow and devoured them with feverish eyes.

But something had gone out of life for Graham. Not Anna. Natalie, watching him closely, wondered what it was. He had been strange and distant with her ever since that tall boy in kilts had been there. He was studiously polite and attentive to her, rose when she entered a room and remained standing until she was seated, brought her the book she had forgotten, lighted her occasional cigaret, kissed her morning and evening. But he no longer came into her dressing-room for that hour before dinner when Natalie, in dressing-gown and slippers, had closed the door to Clayton’s room and had kept him for herself.

She was jealous of Clayton those days. Some times she found the boy’s eyes fixed on his father, with admiration and something more. She was jealous of the things they had in common, of the days at the mill, of the bits of discussion after dinner, when Clayton sat back with his cigar, and Graham voiced, as new discoveries, things about the work that Clayton had realized for years.

He always listened gravely, with no hint of patronage. But Natalie would break in now and then, impatient of a conversation that excluded her.

“Your father knows all these things, Graham,” she said once. “You talk as though you’d just discovered the mill, like Columbus discovering America.”

“Not at all,” Clayton said, hastily. “He has a new viewpoint. I am greatly interested. Go on, Graham.”

But the boy’s enthusiasm had died. He grew self-conscious, apologetic. And Clayton felt a resentment that was close to despair.

The second of April fell on a Saturday. Congress, having ended the session the fourth of March, had been hastily reconvened, and on the evening of that day, Saturday, at half past eight, the President went before the two Houses in joint session.

Much to Clayton’s disgust, he found on returning home that they were dining out.

“Only at the Mackenzies. It’s not a party,” Natalie said. As usual, she was before the dressing-table, and she spoke to his reflection in the mirror. “I should think you could do that, without looking like a thunder-cloud. Goodness knows we’ve been quiet enough this Lent.”

“You know Congress has been reconvened?”

“I don’t know why that should interfere.”

“It’s rather a serious time.” He tried very hard to speak pleasantly. Her engrossment in her own reflection irritated him, so he did not look at her. “But of course I’ll go.”

“Every time is a serious time with you lately,” she flung after him. Her tone was not disagreeable. She was merely restating an old grievance. A few moments later he heard her calling through the open door.

“I got some wonderful old rugs to-day, Clay.”

“Yes?”

“You’ll scream when you pay for them.”

“I’ve lost my voice screaming, my dear.”

“You’ll love these. They have the softest colors, dead rose, and faded blue, and old copper tones.”

“I’m very glad you’re pleased.”

She was in high good humor when they started. Clayton, trying to meet her conversational demands found himself wondering if the significance of what was to happen in Washington that night had struck home to her. If it had, and she could still be cheerful, then it was because she had forced a promise from Graham.

He made his decision then; to force her to release the boy from any promise; to allow him his own choice. But he felt with increasing anxiety that some of Natalie’s weakness of character had descended to Graham, that in him, as in Natalie, perhaps obstinacy was what he hoped was strength. He wondered listening to her, what it would be to have beside him that night some strong and quiet woman, to whom he could carry his problems, his perplexities. Some one to sit, hand in his, and set him right as such a woman could, on many things.