Dalton, Tymber - Love and Brimstone [Brimstone Vampires 1] (Siren Publishing Classic) (37 page)

That was enough to quench her desire faster than a bucket of ice water and pictures of dead puppies.

Unfortunately, she’d already done a damn good job of driving Rafael into a frenzied state of sexual limbo. She’d worked him to the point he clung to her mind, pleading with her for release, and she didn’t know how to extricate herself without finishing what she started. Feeling more than a little nauseous and self-loathful now, she gently pushed him away and allowed him to climax, not sure how else to break the connection without hurting him.

Taz felt his orgasm as if it was her own, heard him moan her name in his mind, and then she was able to withdraw without him clinging to her mind.

Oh, I’m going to be apologizing in the morning.
From her to Rafe. No matter how mad she was, she had no right to do that to him. Especially after he’d opened up to her at dinner.

She felt Matthias was still there, clinging. Out of guilt more than anything, she lifted the barrier a little, enough to see him, afraid to let him in too much.

Matthias was also nearly asleep. She belatedly realized this time that he had not seen what she did with Rafe. She felt some relief there. He was so in love with her, so upset at hurting her that his mind clung to her, even in sleep.

Oh, she
really
owed Rafael a
huge
apology. And Matthias, too. This was
way
more than a kiss.

She caressed Matthias’ mind, guilt overwhelming her with what she’d just done to his cousin, when he responded—

“My love, Anastazia, my only, sweet love…”

She cried, hating herself. Now she had more to make up for. With him vulnerable like this, she could see exactly what Rafael meant about her blood running through Matthias’ veins. His love for her permeated every cell in his body, not just his heart and soul and mind.

Why couldn’t I see that before?
This kind of behavior was so unlike her, and she didn’t understand it. Worse, she hated herself for it. She was not a petty, overreactive woman. It felt like some alien had suddenly taken possession of her brain. She didn’t want to be like this.

She loved Matthias and wanted to be with him. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him.

She caressed Matthias, allowing him in, letting his mind wrap around hers, lovingly, hiding what she did from him and knowing, like Rafe, that he hovered on the edge between sleep and passion.

“Matthias,”
she whispered in his mind,
“I love you.”

“My love, please, love me…”

She didn’t do what she did to Rafael, even though Matthias begged for it. Only if he was in bed with her, asking her himself, wide awake.

She allowed Matthias to drift in and around and through her, comforting him, coaxing him into fitful sleep. When she was sure he was asleep, she withdrew and gently closed the barrier. Now content and happy, he no longer clung to her.

Anastazia, on the other hand, couldn’t sleep. She lay there hating herself, wishing she could take back what she did to Rafael. The bed felt huge and cold without Matthias next to her. She’d never felt more alone in her life. She couldn’t even talk to Robertson about this, too ashamed to admit what she’d done.

She drifted into tortured sleep, and her mind roiled with dreams about Rafael. At one point, he screamed her name, and she felt his essence slam into her like a meteor hitting the earth. She woke up trembling, drained, head aching, the echoes of Rafe’s presence and voice still in her mind.

Serves me right.

* * * *

Rafe shuddered, caught in a dreamlike state somewhere between awake and sleep. Taz came to his mind, and even though he felt guilty and knew it was wrong, he let her have him with only token resistance, let her manipulate him. She was his cousin’s love now, in this life, but she was also a very pissed-off woman. Fighting her wouldn’t do any good, even if he could. In fact, it could make her mad, and she might accidentally hurt him. She still wasn’t totally in control of her powers, wouldn’t understand when to stop.

Besides, technically, she
had
once been his wife.

He felt why Matthias loved her now. She was strong, yet so tender and gentle, so fresh and new. No man could resist her if she set her sights on him. She still didn’t understand her nearly limitless power.

Rafael gave himself to her and wouldn’t tell anyone. What the hell? She wasn’t married yet. If Matthias wanted to keep her, he would have to mark her, or he would one day lose her to her power. Or to him, if given the chance.

It’s not like I’m actually sleeping with her. Talk about a fan-damn-tastic mind fuck!

Taz toyed with him, teased him, and he’d never felt such passion and power. Not since…

Cassandra
.

He cut off that thought, trying to live here and now and not revisit the past. He gave himself to Taz, who she was now, knowing she needed to get this out of her system. And he certainly wasn’t going to complain if she was using him for revenge sex.

Okay, mental revenge sex. And it was the best damn sex he’d had since…since before he lost his sweet Catydid.

Rafael begged Taz for release, knowing it would drive him mad not to have it. When she gave it to him, he thought his entire body would explode through his cock. He moaned, clutched at the sheets, and felt every muscle in his body contract until he was spent.

Then she left. Taz’s abrupt withdrawal from his mind left a gaping void in his soul, driving him to tears of grief he hadn’t cried in centuries.

He rolled over, took a deep shuddering breath, and closed his eyes. The loneliness without Taz there with him was painful. He’d felt her regret at the end, her awareness that she’d made a terrible mistake.

I’ll talk with her tomorrow. Assure her I’m fine with what happened.
She’d let her powers get the better of her, something he’d seen happen before.
She really needs some breathing room to learn what she can do.
She’d spent her entire life unaware of what she could do and keeping a tight rein on her self-control, and now it was backfiring on her.

Rafael felt exhausted, weak, and just as he drifted to sleep, he felt something tickle the edge of his mind.

At first he thought it was Taz and welcomed her back in. She could use him like that any time she wanted. Especially if it meant he could be with her again in some small way. Then the presence crept in, cold and icy. By the time he realized it wasn’t Taz, it was too late for him to fight. He’d welcomed her in and could not push her out.

He stood up, powerless against the person now in control of his mind, and unlocked his cabin door. Five figures entered his room. Unable to do anything else and sensing the end, Rafael reached out to the only person he knew for certain was strong enough to receive him.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

The next morning, Taz got up and unlocked the cabin door. Moe and Curly stood guard outside and tipped their heads in silent greeting. She nodded back and closed the door again. She needed a shower. Even though she hadn’t physically touched Rafael, she still felt him, like she was wearing him, like he was still there with her. And those horrible dreams…

Note to self, never
ever
do that again to
anyone
.

Ever.

When she emerged from the bathroom, Matthias sat on the single bed, watching her.

“I’m sorry about yesterday, Taz. You have every right—”

She threw herself at him, kissing him, wrapping her arms around him.

He seemed surprised but quickly put his arms around her. She sat in his lap and kissed him, erecting a barrier in her mind, keeping him out, still too ashamed to admit what she’d done.

He gently pushed her back. “What’s wrong?”

She shook her head, kissed him again. “I’m sorry, Matthias. I’m
so
sorry.”

He held her, breathing in her scent, his hands on her back. “It’s okay. You’re not ready, and I’ve dragged you out here and thrown all this at you. It’s understandable you’re upset. You were right. I was wrong to let him kiss you, and I was wrong to spy on you the way I did. I had no right. I should have told you I could do that and would be there to keep you safe. I should not have kept that from you. I’m not mad that you kissed him, Taz. It’s okay. It was just a kiss. I know you two hit it off. I should have told Rafe to go easy on you. I could never be angry with you.”

She cried, sobbed. God, she hated that she felt so weak. She’d cried more in the past few days than she had in the past few years. Even when her parents died, she didn’t cry this much.

Matthias kissed her neck. “I owe you everything. I owe you my life. I can never repay you, Anastazia. I drag you out here and put you through hell and you still love me.” He rested his forehead against hers. “I have never loved anyone as much as I love you. I don’t know how, but I promise I will make this up to you.”

He kissed her once more and gently extricated himself from her grasp. “We need to eat breakfast. The meeting is at ten, at Canyon. Will you please come with us?”

She nodded. She owed him, not the other way around. She owed him more than he would ever know.

“Good,” he said. “I need to take a shower.”

“Okay.” She waited until he was under the water and bolted out the door to Rafe’s cabin. Moe followed her, and when she arrived, she held her hand up to the guard, wanting him to stay away. He stopped just out of earshot, but close enough he could help.

She knocked on the door and it swung open.

“Rafe?” she called. No lights on, total silence.

His cabin didn’t have a raised stoop like hers. She noticed two strange grooves in the gravel by the front door, disappearing around the corner. She was about to investigate when she heard a noise inside, and Rafe emerged from the bathroom.

She could have sworn it had been empty.

His eyes glittered in the early morning light. “Yes?”

“Can I come in? I really think we need to talk.”

He didn’t turn on the light, just stood there looking at her. He was bare from the waist up, and she blushed as she remembered what he looked like the night before without clothes, even though it was just in her mind.

“I have to get ready,” he said.

She felt something out of sorts. When she tried to reach out to him with her mind, he took a step toward her. “I can’t talk now. Go.”

“Rafe, are you mad at me?”

His smile chilled her, and she suddenly had an overwhelming urge to run, a voice screaming the command in her mind.

Rafael looked at Moe standing behind her. “No, I’m not mad,” he whispered, his right hand on the doorframe. “I’m not mad at all.” She glanced at his ring. It looked wrong somehow. And he wasn’t rubbing it.

Rafael pushed the door shut and locked it. Taz stumbled backward, almost tripping.

There was something else, something she couldn’t place. Then she was sprinting, Moe barely able to keep up, back to the cabin.

Matthias was stepping out of the bathroom when she bolted in and collided with him.

He saw her face. “What is it?”

“There’s something wrong with Rafe.”

“What?”

She stammered. This wasn’t the time to try to talk. “I don’t know. He’s—there’s something
wrong.
”