Cut Too Deep (56 page)

Hadley’s friends and family took up half of the auditorium. Miller, Mac, Adele, and Don took their seats in the front row. Miller turned to look behind him, nodding politely at Dr. LeClair and smiling at Ayida.

The doctor responded with a curt nod. He had begun writing a piece he hoped to publish soon in the American Academy of Psychiatrics Journal; Hadley’s story to be studied by other therapists around the world for the success it was.

Hadley waited nervously backstage, the overhead lighting already causing her to sweat. She felt hands curl around her shoulder and knew immediately it was Sascha. She turned to her grandmother. Pride gleamed in the woman’s soft green gaze.

“I’m so incredibly proud of you.”

Hadley swiped under her eyes before tears ruined her makeup. Seconds later, she pirouetted across the stage with her peers to the angelic sound of Petite Ouverture.

Opening the second act, Hadley pressed her toes into the stage to begin her solo of the Sugar Plum Fairy. She performed it with a grace that left her grandmother speechless, and her friends and family applauding and screaming inappropriately.

As the ballet closed and Hadley took her final curtsey, she felt if she listened hard enough she would hear the angelic voice of her mother singing her praises. Perhaps maybe a whisper of pride in the background from her father. Since the trial, she had moments of doubt about Duwatski’s confession. There was the lingering possibility he lied. She would never be certain. Her father murdered her mother in a violent fit of rage, and, although Hadley would always live with the memory, she wanted to forgive her father. Knowing somewhere deep inside of him, he desired to change made it easier.

Maybe Dr. LeClair would classify her as suffering from denial, but she opted to see the best in her father. That Vitale Rosanov had finally found his way, accepted the love his mother bestowed on him, and became the husband and father Hadley always wanted him to be. When the curtain closed, she chose to believe her parents’ journey ended much the same as hers.

With the love they all deserved.

Six months later…

M
ental illness isn’t a curable disease, but rather an imprint on one’s mind that will always lead them to believe disaster awaits them. For Hadley Walker, she would always assume the worst and question the motives of people in her life. Only now, during those moments of dread, when her brain conjured up illusions, they passed instantaneously. With little effort, she sorted the facts and calmed her nerves, the process second nature. Her ability to regulate her thoughts grew daily. She’d always have to fight, but she’d never again lose. Her past would never be victorious.

Hadley continued dancing at the ballet, but on her days off, she spent time volunteering at a local battered women’s shelter and a crisis center for victims of sexual assault in Brooklyn. While she had come a long way in healing the pain of her abuse, she would never completely forget how helpless and defenseless she had once been. She took great pride in working with other women whom were still on the road to recovery.

Joining in the fight to help was Theresa Jensen.

Hadley and Theresa had more in common than Miller. A few months ago, Theresa showed up at Miller’s condo in tears, only it wasn’t Miller she’d asked to speak with. Hadley spent the night listening to Theresa share her story of being sexually assaulted by her old swim coach. It began when Theresa was seven-years-old and continued through high school. In time, Theresa developed feelings for her coach, and then he handed her over to one of his friends. She never reported it and never spoke of it to a single person, afraid of what he would do to her.

The first thing Hadley did was put her in touch with Dr. LeClair. He assessed that Theresa’s behavior in adulthood, from drug use to her internal need to be dominated, stemmed from the sexual abuse she suffered as a child.

With help, Theresa found the courage to file charges against her old coach and his friend. Both she and Hadley were appalled to learn the statute of limitations had run out and no charges would be filed. Hadley took Theresa to see Sophia Harper about a civil case. Once Sophia took Theresa’s case public, three more victim’s surfaced, all with a similar account to Theresa’s, only within the statute of limitations. A trial was set to begin in a couple of months, and Hadley would be at her new friend’s side through it all. With Sophia’s help, Hadley and Theresa were working to change the law concerning the statute of limitations with regards to sexual crimes committed against minors. They were pushing to eliminate a time limit all together.

Mac remained Hadley’s most trusted friend. He and Adele were still in the dreaded friend-zone, and Hadley knew Mac was growing impatient. Hadley encouraged him to tell her how he felt, but as of yet, he hadn’t been able to.

Don McAllister came to breakfast each and every Sunday. He was a staple in her life, and she adored him. For Don, Hadley was the child he always wanted, but without a wife who hated his career. He had a few lady friends. They were all he needed.

Hadley’s relationship with both of her grandmothers had grown stronger. Hadley accepted them for who they were and forgave the mistakes they’d made. Add her relationship with Ayida St. Armont to the mix, and Hadley felt like she had three grandmothers that loved her.

She and Miller still attended weekly dinners at his parents' house. Each and every day, Hadley fell more in love with the Lorino family. Otto was still her favorite and as obnoxious as ever. He was the closest to her in age, and she thought of him as the brother she never had.

Hadley and Vito shared the tightest bond. Initially, she saw it as a keeping her enemies close kind of relationship, but in truth, Hadley loved him as her uncle. As a man, that despite the questionable things he did as head of the Lorino family, Hadley trusted a great deal. He loved her unconditionally.

On a beautiful June afternoon, Don McAllister watched an angel in white approach, setting his jaw to hold back tears. Hadley looped her arm through his. Don covered her hand and smiled down at the little one who would always be strong. He was honored to give her away to a man he knew cherished her as much as he did.

“Are you ready?”

She nodded. It had been a year since their first meeting in the elevator, and now she couldn’t wait to be Miller’s wife.

As the pair turned to the chapel, the doors opened to an attendance of thousands. Mostly strangers to Hadley, another Italian
way
. Hadley met eyes with her almost husband and any doubt of belonging to his family washed away. She had belonged since the moment she met them.

Otto, Quinn, and Aggi stood to Miller’s left in tuxes. In front of Hadley were her bridesmaids dressed in sea-foam-green floor length gowns. Laura, her Maid of Honor, closest to her, then Adele, and Katherine. Michael looked adorable in a tux as he began the march, holding the ring pillow proudly. Marina followed him, beautiful, in a white gown, raining red rose petals down the aisle.

Miller stared at his beautiful wife-to-be as she floated down the aisle, the room narrowing to the two of them. When she arrived, Miller took her hand from Don. The gruff detective had tears in his eyes when he told Miller to take good care of her.

Hadley and Miller’s wedding ceremony was fairly traditional until it came time to exchange their vows. They had chosen to recite their own. Miller went first.

“Hadley Walker, I promise that as your husband, I will take care of you and love you until I take my last breath. For so long, I existed without living, and then one day I saw an angel watching me. I think I knew when we were kids that we were meant to be together, because when we were apart my heartbeat was never quite right, as though it was letting me know something was missing. Only it wasn’t something at all. It was you. They say there are moments in life that take your breath away. For me, those moments happen when I’m with you, with a smile from your gorgeous lips, the way you look at me, or when we kiss. I will be here for you always, in whatever way you need me, to dry your tears, although I hope you have none, to hold you, to vent to when you’re upset, and to laugh with. I can’t wait to share my life with you, to have children with you, and to grow old with you.”

Hadley swallowed the lump in her throat, and though it wasn’t time yet, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him before she began. Thinking about what she wanted to say made her heart swell and her eyes water. How would she ever manage to get the words out? Miller touched her cheek and smiled, erasing her stress. She inhaled a calming breath and began.

“Miller Genetti, before I met you, I lived in a world without hope. I wanted to believe that one day someone might love me, but I never hoped to fall in love or for someone to fall in love with me, and then you entered my life. You gave me hope, for love, for friendship, for family, and for a future. You made it easy to fall in love with you. Whenever I need you, you are there for me. I’ll never forget when I broke down in your arms, you wiped my tears and took care of me with the utmost tenderness, and you’ve continued to do so every day since. As your wife, I promise to give you hope, too. I will be here for you always, in whatever way you need me, to dry your tears, although I hope you have none, to hold you, to vent to when you’re upset, and to laugh with. I can’t wait to share my life with you, to have children with you, and to grow old with you.”

Tears burned Miller’s eyes. They had written their vows together, and when she added children to their words, he’d never felt happier.

After exchanging rings, Hadley and Miller shared their first kiss as husband and wife amongst cheering and clapping from their friends and family.

As the newly married couple turned to walk up the aisle, Hadley took in the faces of her family and smiled.

She loved them.

They were her Famiglia.

It was the way!

Writing is a journey of learning and growth. I have made mistakes, but I learned from those mistakes with a lot of encouragement from those who stood by and nudged me to write the story better, and not to settle for fine. I owe them all many thanks.

For starters; my incredible family who puts up with me, especially at crunch time. Tom (my husband), for his love and support. He’s my rock. My kids have sacrificed a lot of mommy time and have eaten a lot of junk food. I promise to make it up to them.

Without my mother, I might still be writing my first book. She babysat the little one for countless hours, so I could concentrate. I love her dearly. Oh, and she does laundry, enough said!

Big time thanks to my friend Vicki, for her willingness to read my books from the first draft to the end, and for always giving me her honest feedback, even when I disagree with her. She’s been with me since book one, and I hope for many more.

Mad, crazy love to Nic, for believing in and supporting me always. I honestly don’t know what I would do without her. With Cut Too Deep, she talked me off the ledge many times and refused to let me give up on this story.

Sincere gratitude to Desiree, Deenie, CA, Emily, and Denise (who also talked me off the ledge a few times) for BETA reading, and providing me with valuable advice to enhance this story. It takes a village, and you ladies are amazing.