Cursed (14 page)

“I like you Aimee, I can’t stop myself. I’m
trying to just be your friend but you’re perfect and I can’t fight
it anymore.” The words were everything I had ever wanted to
hear.

The phone was silent again as I held my breath
not sure how to respond. “Ok. Uhm maybe we should talk about this
later.” My heart was skipping beats and my head was dizzy.

“Okay, I just wanted you to know. I’m falling
for you.” He went silent after his declaration. I could tell this
was hard for him too.

I wanted to respond with a thank you god or
please don’t move from where you are I’ll be right there but I held
my breath and then almost shouted, “Ok so I will see you in a few
hours.”

“Drive safe.” He hung up. I sat there staring
ahead at the van in front of us at the pump, I didn’t know what to
say.

I started my list of pros and cons and then I
phoned Giselle.

“Hello.” Her voice was raspy.

“Shane just told me he likes me.”

She squealed into the phone, “Yayyyyyyy. Okay I
need to hear every detail word for word skip nothing.”

I told her exactly everything he told me word
for word to which she responded with omg's and seriously and I knew
it. Her advice wasn’t exactly sage wisdom, “I think you should just
do it. You should date him and have sex with him. Your sister never
did hey. She never got him into bed.”

Suddenly Shane was dirty again, my sister dated
him what was I thinking.

“Okay look I gotta go Aims I’m super tired out,
they took more blood this morning and I’m beat. I’ll see you in a
few weeks cool?”

I felt tears rolling down my cheeks, “Yeah for
sure. Dad and I will be back don’t worry.”

“Peace out.” She clicked off and I was alone
again. I had officially lost control of my emotions. I looked to
the sky, well roof of the truck, “Mom I need you.”

Chapter Five - I AM A
RATIONAL HUMAN BEING

I walked into the library where I’d asked my dad
to drop me off after the long drive and thankfully I felt the
outside world leave me alone as I caught the first scent of the
books. I loved the smell of books but even more I loved getting
lost in them. If there ever was a time in my life I needed to get
lost in books it was that moment. I didn’t know what to do about
Shane or Giselle or the stalker. It was too much excitement for how
sick I was starting to feel again. I worried about my own liver
nearly as much as I worried about Giselles’.

I smiled at the librarian, “Hey Mary.”

She waved slightly not really letting her eyes
leave the stacks she was checking, “Aimee it’s been forever. You
still have that book out on ancient medicinal practices?”

I laughed, “Yeah I need it for a few more weeks
I will resign it out today.”

“Good enough for me.” She walked over to her
card catalogue.

Our library was tiny with little or no
technology ever making its way through the front doors, partly from
lack of funding but partly because it wasn’t needed, Mary
remembered every book that left.

I made my way to the history section and sat on
the floor touching the spines of the books, feeling the history
flow from them to me. My mom had taught me to love and respect
history, especially art which was a visual documentation of
history. Every aspect of a civilizations time, whether it was
education, religion or science was documented in art. Even the cave
painting taught us something about the people of its time.

“Can I just slip past you there?” I knew his
voice straightaway. It was like my favorite song, I loved the sound
immediately upon hearing it.

Afraid I would be disappointed to find someone
else yet again I looked up to see his smiling face and I felt
myself beam, “It’s you.”

He frowned looking incredibly disappointed,
“Sorry have we met?”

He was exactly as I remembered, very tall,
strong looking, dark blond hair cut short and the whitest blue eyes
I had ever seen.

“You saved my life. I remember you. I was
choking.” The words flew from my mouth as the memories flooded my
brain. I looked at his sizable hands and remembered them inside my
mouth. I shuddered a little at the thought, “I was on the floor
turning blue and you picked the vomit out of my mouth.”

He started to laugh, instantly I loved that
sound, it was strong but filled with joy, “I’m really sorry miss
but I think you’re mistaken. I just need a book from where you’re
sitting.”

I put a hand on the bookshelf to help myself
stand and winced slightly as I stood up.

“No it’s true, I saw you?” I couldn’t stop
staring into his eyes.

He smiled, as I felt compelled to step closer to
him and smell him, I knew he would smell familiar like fresh ocean
air but more intense like incense. I didn’t know how I knew what he
would smell like, he was supposed to be a ghost.

“Look I am really sorry but I have never met you
in my life. I think you’re confused.” He looked at me sternly like
he was trying to intimidate me into believing what my soul knew to
be a lie.

I was nervous in the smallest doubting part of
my mind that he could be the rapist still but somehow I knew his
face better than I knew my own and his lips were not thin they were
perfectly plump, my favorite kind.

“I’m Aimee.” I put a hand out for him to take.
He hesitated and sighed like he didn’t want to touch me. I wanted
it so badly that when he even considered putting a hand out I
grabbed it and shook his hand. For me it was as if our skin melted
into each other’s for a split second. Touching him was like
watching a scene from a movie where the main characters realize
they’re madly in love and stare at each other while the world spins
past them. I was excited by the feel of his skin it meant he was
real. He looked to be in pain the entire time touching me; my heart
was broken watching his response to touching me. Clearly the
affection was one sided.

“It’s nice meeting you, uhhh-” I waited for him
to answer his name.

He sighed, “Aleksander. My name is
Aleksander.”

“Aleksander, that’s a nice name.” I almost
whispered my sentence. His eyes flinched hearing me speak his
name.

He looked like he was trying to be relaxed but
was failing miserably.

I smirked at him, “Now we have officially met,
don’t you want to talk about why I was on the floor throwing
up?”

He fought a smile still looking at me intently,
I was reading the giant get lost he was sending my way but I
ignored it as I continued, “I was drugged at a party. You were
there, how do you know Shane?”

He shook his head, “I don’t know Shane, and I
wasn’t at the party. Who drugged you?” He didn’t seem interested at
all but being polite by asking.

I wondered if he was toying with me, “Everyone
thinks YOU did.” I said boldly.

His face dropped, “I would never do such a
despicable thing. Why would you say that? Besides if I was
apparently the one picking the vomit out why would I save you after
trying to kill you?”

Unaware that we were still holding hands I
watched him seem to struggle with being near me.

I looked him deeply in the eyes, it was
hypnotic, “You swear on my mom’s grave you never drugged me?”

He flinched, “God you don’t kid around do you?”
He looked me severely in the eyes back and squeezed my hand
faintly, “I have never and will never drug you. I could never hurt
you.”

I hadn’t taken a breath in a while and started
to feel light headed though I’m not entirely certain it wasn’t from
being drawn to him more than anything in the entire world.

“You are so familiar to me.” I whispered still
close to his face, his lips were inches from mine. I could feel the
heat of his breath on my mouth. He dropped my hand leaving it
hanging in the air cold suddenly.

“Maybe you dreamt of me Aimee.” He smiled the
most delicious smile I had ever seen. He looked liked he was
struggling with something though internally.

I backed away needing to come out of the bubble
we had somehow stepped into where we were the only people in the
world.

“Beloved.” He whispered.

I was speechless; it had been a long time since
anyone had said that word, “What?” I felt the color draining from
my face.

“Your name it means beloved.” He looked
distractedly at me and shook his head.

I took another step away from him, “How do you
know that?”

“Je parle français.” He spoke tenderly.

I nodded, “well your name means great
protector.” I don’t even know why I said it but he started
chuckling, “I know.”

“My mom called me beloved, all the time.” There
was gloom in my voice I couldn’t stop.

He winced, “How did she die?” He was making
conversation and being nice to me, but I could see by his flinching
eyes he wanted badly to escape. Now that I had finally found him I
wasn’t going to make it so easy.

I never took my eyes off of him as I spoke
quietly, “She was driving from the city to here, she started to get
sleepy I guess even though it was mid day so she got out of the car
on the side of the road and did some stretching. Sometimes she did
that. There was a trucker driving toward her and a dog ran out in
front of him, a big dog he said. Like a wolf. He swerved and lost
control of the tandem trailers he was pulling. My mom was in front
of the car when the back trailer swung around.”

He cringed seeing the pain on my face, “I’m so
sorry.”

I had never told the story before; those words
had never left my mouth. I didn’t cry like I thought I would if I
ever had to tell the story of my mom’s death. For some reason I was
happy he was the one I told.

“She was actually really close to home too,
that’s the weird part. She was only about thirty minutes away. It
was nine months ago.”

He nodded, “That’s tragic.”

“She was an art historian.” The words just kept
popping out.

He smiled, “The most complete detailed
biographies in history are art.”

I shook my head stunned, “That’s what my mom
always said.”

He laughed; it was like music to me, “I guess
art lovers all feel that way. I am a huge art buff myself.”

I was having a hard time to guess his age, he
was a man of that I was certain but I couldn’t imagine him being
twenty-five yet. His face was young looking but his eyes were
wise.

“Want to go for a coffee?” I asked quickly
before he could end our conversation.

He frowned trying to be polite, “I really need
to get going.”

I panicked wanting to grab his arm and drag him
somewhere I could make him be mine.

Seeing the desperation in my eyes he softened
for a second, “well I guess one quick coffee wouldn’t kill.” He
offered me his arm, he was a gentleman.

I nodded, “Okay.” He must have been able to
sense the relief in me as he agreed. He seemed so distant even
though he was right beside me.

I felt my phone going off in my pocket and
smiled, “I need to tell my dad where we are going.” I grabbed my
phone and texted my dad a message explaining I had gone for a
coffee with a friend to talk about art.

I put the phone back in my pocket certain my dad
was texting me back but I ignored the texts and walked holding onto
Aleksander's strong arm.

He escorted me from the library across the
street to the café called Cup O’Feelin, it was a jazz café that was
seasonal and now that it was April it had reopened for the summer.
Coastal towns rely a lot on tourism.

“So what are you reading now?” He asked looking
down at me, his gaze burned through me and I felt things a little
nerd like me had only ever scoffed at.

“Ancient medicinal practices, it’s riveting.” I
replied smiling. I didn’t watch where I was walking and I didn’t
look around me, I walked trusting him. Something about him made me
feel so protected. I felt healthy again somehow stronger.

He opened the door for me and waited as I walked
through I only took my eyes off of him for the second it took him
to walk in behind me.

Adele was singing on the radio about love and
hurting as we walked in, I could smell the coffee and fresh baked
treats but I hungered for something I couldn’t quite name. I didn’t
know what it was like to lust after someone. I wanted him to touch
me, I actually envisioned him pulling his shirt off and then mine
and how warm his skin would be next to mine. I imagined him soft
and smooth but hard under his skin. I blushed nearly fanning myself
and smiled at the woman at the counter. Oblivious to my existence
she smiled at Aleksander and nearly drooled, “Why hello there, see
anything you like?”

I wanted to shout up and down, ‘I do I do.’

Aleksander never took his eyes off of me,
“Whatever the lady is having.”

I smiled, at him and spoke to her, “Soy latté
and a lemon tart please.”

“Lemon for you as well?” She asked trying
desperately to get his attention, he nodded and handed the cash to
her but his eyes were locked on me.

We looked like Bambi and Faline twitterpated
unable to be around normal people, at least I did.

I sat down at the table he guided me too and
watched him get our coffees and tarts. Normally my favorite treat
but I could barely taste it as I listened to him talk in a way that
seemed nervous almost. I noticed the other women in the room were
watching him almost as intently as I was.

“So why are you here?

He smiled, “Maybe this is my hometown.”

I shook my head, “No way. You’re not from here
so start talking.”

He nodded, “You’re right I’m not from here,” he
laughed and bit into his tart, “I am here for work. Just a couple
weeks.” He started to chew; I had never noticed anyone eat before
except Brad Pitt in Ocean’s Eleven but this was better. His cheeks
and jaw muscles flexed while his lips glistened with the
movement.