Crossing the Ice (17 page)

“Do you have any new songs planned for tonight?”

“Maybe.” His blank expression didn’t give anything away.

“No hints?”

“You’ll just have to listen carefully.”

What was he going to play? Hopefully not some song about broken hearts or people better off as friends. I might break down in the middle of the restaurant.

Stephanie and Mark skated past us, looking less than thrilled, and Josh said, “We should get started.”

I nodded and listened attentively as he described the next series of steps. When he took my hand, he went quiet, and I let him lead me into a dance hold as if we were waltzing. I felt like I was floating in his arms across the ice.

We drifted closer together, and my pulse thumped so hard it reverberated in my ears. Josh twirled me around and pulled me even nearer, his palm pressed to my lower back. I drew in a breath and kept my eyes on his chest as I’d done when he’d taught me the tango.

Do NOT look at him.

He slowly released me, and I forgot the next step until he guided me into side-by-side stroking. Our movements were perfectly in unison even though we’d never skated together before. We worked up speed as we turned the corner of the rink, and then we both extended one leg for a dual spiral position. Josh wrapped his arms around me from behind, nestling me to his chest, and we glided on matching smooth edges, flying across the ice. My whole body tingled with a thrilling buzz. This was the moment I’d dreamt of when I first discovered pair skating. This was the feeling.

We glided to a slow stop and were met with long stares from Mark and Stephanie, who were in the middle of their own waltz.

“Having fun?” Mark asked tersely.

I thought it best not to answer with my true sentiment of “YES!” They skated away from us, so I was saved from having to give a reply, but I knew Mark would probably give me an earful later.

“There’s a dance lift I want to try next,” Josh said, sounding very excited. “Ready to give it a go?”

“Sure.”

We went over the logistics of his idea, which required me to hook my arms around his neck and let him hold my legs in a full split position as we rotated. We walked through the steps slowly to begin, and I didn’t realize how close our faces would be until I locked my arms around him. I could feel his breath on my lips.

Dear God…

In an attempt not to gaze into his eyes, I ended up looking at his mouth, which was no less torturous.

Maybe I should just close my eyes.

I did my best to focus on the technique, and when we felt comfortable we had the timing down, we took off across the ice to gather speed. All in a fluid motion, I latched onto Josh and pulled myself up, and he held my thighs as I stretched into a split. We began to rotate, and I couldn’t help but giggle as we spun lightning fast. I was like a giddy kid on a merry-go-round. Josh beamed a huge smile at me, and I didn’t want this to end. I wanted to keep spinning, keep holding onto him, keep seeing him so happy.

Our momentum slowed, dashing my hopes, and Josh set me down. We were both still smiling, though, and Josh’s warm hands lingered on my shoulders.

“Hey,” Em said as she skated over to us.

“Hey.” I put some distance between Josh and myself.

“Looks like it’s going well over here.” She gave us each a longer look than necessary.

“Yep,” Josh said.

“The lift was fantastic. That was a beautiful position you hit, Court.”

“Thanks. It was a lot of fun.”

“Your partners aren’t smiling nearly as much, or at all for that matter, but they’re going to look like they’re having the time of their lives come show night if it kills me.”

We only had a few minutes left, so Em herded us all together and gave us a few encouraging words before dismissing us. Stephanie and Josh skated ahead, and Mark touched my elbow, halting me beside the boards.

“Hold up a sec,” he said. “I wanna talk about what’s going on with you and Josh.”

Blood rushed to my face. Even though I expected him to question me, it sounded like he knew more than I’d thought.

“What are you talking about?”

“He designed the group number so you could skate together because he has a crush on you. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”

If he’d noticed it, then Em surely had, too. It hadn’t stopped her from letting us skate together, though.

“He and Em designed the number together, and they did it this way because it would be an interesting twist,” I said.

“Come on, Court. You can’t tell me you don’t see that he obviously has a thing for you. You seem to enjoy the attention.”

“There’s nothing going on between us if that’s what you’re worried about.”

It wasn’t a total lie. Josh and I had enjoyed five minutes of bliss together but were now sadly done.

“I’m not worried about that. He’d never have the guts to do anything,” Mark said.

My face grew warmer as I remembered Josh’s passionate kiss and his hands hot on my skin. Oh, he had the guts.
I
was the coward.

“Just keep your guard up,” Mark said. “I don’t trust him. He might’ve also thought up this whole partner switch thing to try to pit you and me against each other.”

Josh doesn’t have any shady intentions!
I wanted to scream.
He just wants to be close to me!

Instead I took a calming breath. “It’s just a simple Christmas show number, not an evil plot. Can you stop with the conspiracy theories?”

I skated to the ice door and snapped on my guards. It was going to be a long two months of rehearsals if I had to pretend I didn’t love skating with Josh. I didn’t know if I could even pull that off. It wasn’t a knock against Mark because I’d always enjoyed having him as my partner. When we skated together, I loved the athletic excitement of it. But when I’d partnered with Josh, I’d felt something new, something I couldn’t quite grasp yet. All I knew was I wanted more.

****

“How’s your steak?” I asked Josh as I refilled his water, making sure not to come close to overflowing the glass.

“It’s awesome.” He set his fork down. “Who’s going to refill my water just the way I like it when you’re not here next week?”

I smiled. “I’ll leave a note for whoever’s working Thursday night.”

“Are you getting excited for Paris?”

“I’m excited to compete. It feels like we’ve been working on these programs for a year. I don’t think we’ll do much sight-seeing since we did all that the first two times we competed there.”

“Yeah, I mean once you’ve seen the Eiffel Tower a couple times, it’s just like any old monument,” he said with a teasing grin.

I laughed. “That’s not what I meant. I’m just saying we’ll be more focused on the competition this time and less concerned with being tourists.”

I set down the water pitcher and wiped my hands on my apron. “The Eiffel Tower probably isn’t a big deal for
you
, though. I bet your family did a lot of fancy traveling when you were growing up.”

“Actually, we didn’t. My dad traveled a lot for business, but we rarely went on those trips. We mostly just went to our beach house in Malibu.”

“Beach house in Malibu? Oh, that sounds positively awful.” I gave him my own teasing grin.

“You’ve never sat in L.A. traffic with Steph and my mom arguing.”

“Okay, maybe that doesn’t sound like the best vacation.”

He folded his arms on the ledge of the bar. “The house itself is great, though. The piano faces the glass doors to the deck, so I can see the ocean while I play.”

“That must be amazing.”

“It is. I’d love to show it—” He stopped himself but then finished quietly, “To you.”

His sad eyes held me captive, crushing my soul. He took a long drink of water, and I made up an excuse to go to the kitchen. I had to get out of there before I went back on everything I’d said at the beach. After the rush of skating with Josh that afternoon, I was feeling especially vulnerable, and listening to him express his desire to take me to Malibu wasn’t exactly strengthening my resolve.

I dawdled in the kitchen as long as I could and kept myself busy on the opposite end of the bar from Josh until he finished eating. He stood and pushed up the sleeves of his gray striped sweater, and I went to clear his dishes.

“I’ll give you a hint about the new song,” he said. “It’ll be the last one.”

Damn, so he was going to make me wait all night. Well, he’d earned the right to toy with me after I’d shot him down so quickly.

“I’ll be anxiously listening,” I said.

I was curious if he was still going to play “Over the Rainbow” for me. It would be the friendly thing to do, but again I couldn’t blame him if he didn’t.

I didn’t have to think about it long because it was the first song he played. Then I turned to wondering if he was sending me some kind of message by leading off the night with my favorite.

The rest of the night dragged by, not helped by a tipsy couple who spent their entire time at the bar alternating between arguing and showering each other with PDA. When the hands on my watch neared ten o’clock, I drifted toward the end of the bar closest to the piano. Josh took a sip of water and flexed his fingers, and I watched him work his magic over the keys.

I didn’t recognize the melody at first, but then it came to me — “La Vie en Rose.” For my Paris trip. I smiled, and Josh looked over at me and tipped his head. I did a little tap dance and swayed back and forth to the whimsical song as I cleaned up the bar and got ready for close.

I should’ve known Josh wouldn’t play something angsty about our situation. He wasn’t that kind of guy.

He was the perfect guy.

My throat tightened, and I rushed around the bar, trying to focus on work. When Josh finished playing and emptied his tip glass, I escaped to the kitchen again to avoid him. I had to get my purse anyway. My tie felt like it was choking me, so I yanked it off and shoved it in my big sack purse.

“You okay?” Meredith asked.

“Yeah, it’s just been a long night.”

“I know we haven’t been able to hang out much lately, but call me anytime if you need to talk.”

I could use a friend to talk to. Liza was the only one who knew what had gone down with Josh and me, and she’d gone back to New York. Plus, she was too young to really understand.

“Thanks. There has been some stuff going on. Maybe we can hang out this weekend and I can tell you about it.”

A clap of thunder boomed, and lightning flashed through the open back door. Meredith grabbed her purse and gave me a quick hug.

“It’s about to pour,” she said. “Let’s definitely make a plan tomorrow night.”

“Sounds good.”

I took another minute to collect myself before I went back to the dining room. Josh and I always walked out the front together, and I needed to thank him, too.

“I loved the song,” I said as I met him at the hostess’s stand. “It was perfect.”

“I thought it would be a good sendoff.”

He opened the door, and lightning flashed again. A few heavy drops dotted my white shirt.

“I have something else for you, too… for your trip,” he said. “It’s in my car.”

He had a present for me? Thunder rumbled louder, and I looked up at the dark clouds racing across the moon. “We should probably hurry.”

“It’ll just take a minute.” He unlocked his car. “Come inside so you don’t get wet.”

I didn’t think it would be good for me emotionally to be in a small enclosed space with him for even just a minute, but I was so curious about the gift he had for me.

I slid into the car and set my purse on the floor mat, and Josh came around and shut his door. He reached behind his seat and presented me with a small green gift bag.

“It’s just a little something to keep you entertained,” he said.

I stuck my hand into the bag and pulled out a CD. Since we were on the dark end of the lot, I had to squint to read the cover. There was a photo of Mickey Mouse wearing sunglasses, and the title read
Mickey Unrapped
. I flipped it over and saw some of the song titles, and I burst into laughter.

“Oh my God, are these Disney rap songs?” I asked.

Josh grinned. “They are indeed.”

“‘Ice Ice Mickey,’ ‘Ducks in the ‘Hood.’” I held my stomach as I laughed harder. “Where did you find this?”

“It’s mind-boggling what you can find on the internet.”

“This is the most fabulous thing I’ve ever seen.”

“I figured it was the perfect mix for you since you’re a fan of both Disney songs and gangsta rap. You can download it onto your iPod for the long flight.”

My laughter faded as a deeper swell of emotion took over me. Josh had remembered what I liked and he’d taken the time to look for the CD for me. He could’ve said “Screw it” and not given it to me after I’d told him we could only be friends. But he hadn’t.

“Thank you so much for this.” I slipped the CD and the bag into my purse. “You were so sweet to think of me.”

I sat back and waited for him to say something, but he stared quietly at the dashboard. The rain fell harder on the windshield, drowning out the silence.

He slowly turned and looked at me. “I think about you all the time.”

Another flood of emotion hit me, this time like a tidal wave. Lightning illuminated the car, showing me the wanting in Josh’s eyes, and everything I felt for him rushed to the surface. I couldn’t fight the resistance anymore.

I leaned across the console and pressed my mouth to Josh’s. He responded immediately and curled his hand behind my neck, pulling me closer. His lips were hot and sweet, and they erased all the ache, all the longing. God, I wanted the kiss to last forever.

His other hand touched my thigh, and my pulse raced even faster. I threaded my fingers through his hair and leaned into him, but he still wasn’t close enough. I needed to feel
all
of him.

I climbed over the stick shift and straddled his lap, and he groaned against my lips. Our kisses were deep and hungry, drawing all the breath from my body, but I gladly gave it to him. I would give
everything
to him.

His mouth trailed across my jaw with a feathery touch, and the beads of my earring jangled as he softly kissed my earlobe. I felt goose bumps in places I didn’t know possible. He ran his finger along my collar and deftly opened the top button of my shirt, giving his lips access to my neck. I tilted my head back, and he sucked gently on my tender skin, turning me inside out with desire. I pushed up his sweater and slipped my hands underneath, feeling my way over his hard muscles.