Creators (8 page)

“Louisa,” I finished. “I know. They were always so close. You should go see her.” My father opened his mouth to reply, but I cut him off. “She needs you. I know things with us haven’t been easy since you’ve been back, but I’m still glad you’re here. She needs you, too,” I repeated.

My father took a deep breath, running a hand over his face. “I’ll go see her now. All right?”

I nodded. Everything, momentarily, was all right.

…

“If you’re not going to eat that, I’ll sure as hell take it,” Stephanie said to Henry, reaching over and grabbing a piece of meat off his plate with her fork.

“Who said I wasn’t going to eat it? You know what they say about people who assume things?” he asked. I looked up at Henry, expecting to find a scowl or at least a sense of stoniness, but he was grinning at Stephanie.

When I had spotted Henry and Stephanie sitting together at dinner, I didn’t think I would be interrupting something if I sat with them. My body was still tingling and jumpy from my encounter with the chosen one, and I had hoped listening to them prattle on would be enough to calm my nerves.

Stephanie laughed. It was much brighter, lighter than I had expected from someone like her. “You were batting it around like you had invented a new sport,” she said, reaching over again for a second piece.

Henry chuckled and pushed his plate in front of Stephanie. She grinned even wider. “And what exactly do they say about people who assume things?”

“That you make an ass out of you and me,” I spoke up, finishing their lame joke. For some reason their happiness was rubbing me the wrong way, and it wasn’t because of jealousy. As I shoveled the food into my mouth, the high I experienced after proving I could handle myself was fading. Something else was replacing it.

Something darker.

“I thought you had duty tonight?” Henry asked Stephanie.

“I did. Charlie let me off early. We all hate when he does that. He’s so important to the cause, you know? But there’s no telling him otherwise. When he gets an idea in his head, well, he—”

“I have no problem telling him otherwise,” I cut in, attempting a smile. Penance for my earlier grouchy behavior.

“You’re his daughter. I think all daughters are wired for that,” she replied good-naturedly.

“You told him, right? About my involvement with the resistance movement back at Templeton?” Henry asked, choosing to ignore my remarks.

I wondered what he had told Stephanie about his involvement in the murder of young incubating chosen ones. His girlfriend at the time, Julia, had pulled the cords on the machines that kept them alive. He had never bothered to explain to me exactly what his role was in the event. The council never found out he was a part of it, but Julia was executed.

Stephanie nodded, stuffing a forkful of food into her mouth.

“Well, what did he say?”

Stephanie held up a finger as she finished chewing. As she took her time, I suspected she was trying to come up with an answer that, while truthful, would still please him. Henry must have picked up on the stalling tactic as well because he reached over and placed a hand on her arm. “Don’t worry about it. I figured he wouldn’t let me in.”

My eyes widened as I watched Henry’s hand lingering on her arm. Even more surprising, she didn’t seem to have a problem with it. I cleared my throat, and he pulled his hand back.

“That’s not it at all. He appreciates your dedication to the cause, but he just has a lot on his shoulders right now. I mean something big. Maybe when this is over, you two can talk,” she replied.

“No, I get it,” Henry said casually. Too casually. He was putting on a show to make her feel better. I knew how much Henry’s need for revenge against the council propelled him—it was what drove him. And I didn’t entirely blame him. He had watched the council brutally attack and murder his mother and sisters. I thought of Louisa, pregnant and scared, and I wanted a bit of revenge myself.

“Seriously. Once this is all done, we’ll both go and talk to him. We could use a good man like you,” Stephanie said.

The side of Henry’s mouth pulled up in an attempt at a smile. “A good man, huh? You obviously didn’t hear that from anyone I know.”

Stephanie blushed again, and I was sure this time it had nothing to do with me. “Sometimes you can just tell.”

As I left the dining hall, I nearly knocked into Eric. “Whoa, there. What’s got your ass on fire?” he asked, grabbing me by the elbows in an attempt to steady me.

“Nothing,” I lied. I still couldn’t shake the dark feeling that had grabbed hold of me.

“Doesn’t seem like nothing,” he teased, looking over my head into the dining hall. “Aren’t those two cozy? What do you think that’s all about?”

I shrugged. “Nothing. Henry wants in on whatever my father is cooking up.”

“Nah, it’s more than that. They’re looking pretty intimate if you ask me. There’s all kinds of wants and needs bouncing between those two,” he noted, leaning back against a post. A lazy smile graced his face, and I could tell there was a part of him that enjoyed making me uncomfortable. I imagined this was what it would have been like if I had ever had an older brother.

I decided to give in to his bait. “Wants and needs?” I asked.

“Yeah. That’s how people work. How they size each other up. Whenever you meet someone new you gotta ask yourself two things: What do I need from him? What do I want from him? And for most people you’ll meet it’s usually a pretty good mixture of wanting and needing, but when you find that person you want more than you need…well, that’s got trouble all over it.”

Eric’s smile disappeared. “McNair told me that once.” He pushed himself on the post and began to walk back and forth. “Something’s not right about this, Tess.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, not liking the way a chill had danced its way up my spine at his words.

“So, your father rescues you and just sits around the community. For what?”

“He says he’s planning something.” But at Eric’s words the feeling I had been trying to push down almost consumed me. Something wasn’t right. Why
would
my father tell me he wanted me out of this only to train me to fight? Why the sudden change? Was it just to teach his stubborn daughter a lesson? He told me it was because I was going to fight anyway, but it still seemed so sudden. Now that the adrenaline had worn off, my lesson seemed demented, brutal.

“Yeah, but what? If it’s some sort of attack, then why base yourself here? We’re quite a ways from the council headquarters.”

I shrugged, forcing my face to hide my doubts. “We have our own rebel sect here.”

“Yeah, but all they ever do is gather intel. They’re not really the fighting kind.”

“Well, if they’re into gathering intel then maybe that’s what my father is doing. Gathering information so he can set his plan into motion,” I suggested.

“It doesn’t feel like he’s planning anything. It feels like he’s hiding from someone, and he drags that group of yes-sir men and women around with him for protection,” Eric said.

“Hiding? I don’t think my father’s the run from a fight type. He left my family to fight in the resistance.”

“Maybe he’s not hiding,” Eric said. “Maybe he’s hiding something.”

“What would he be hiding?” I asked. But something whispered in the back of my mind. Mention of a package. Could that be it? But what object could be so important?

Eric stared off into the slowly fading sunlight. A sign that the one thing we could always count on was that light would give in to darkness. “I don’t know, but I intend to find out. If you hear anything, you’ll let me know?”

Eric could read my hesitation. “You’re one of us now. You’re part of this community. Whatever your father is hiding, by keeping it here, he’s putting everyone in danger. People who took you in, Tess. Despite everything, you should remember that.”

I thought of Lockwood and Sharon, and I knew I would do anything to protect them. They had become my family out in the wildness.

“The people who live here didn’t come to this place because they wanted to fight. They came here because they wanted to live,” Eric said softly.

I nodded. “You’re right. And I’ll do whatever I can to make sure they’re safe.”

Eric exhaled with relief. “Now, we just need to find out what he’s planning.”

I looked up at my new co-conspirator. “I think I may have an idea. How long does it take to make that shine stuff? You know, that drink that makes you drunk?”

Eric simply grinned.

Later that evening, I trudged toward the infirmary where Louisa was staying. I lifted my hand to knock on the door when I heard her laugh drift out from underneath it. I stilled. It was one of the most beautiful noises I had ever heard. I cringed thinking about how shrill her laughter had always sounded to my ears. Now that I could lose her, it brought me joy.

I leaned my ear against the door. Lockwood’s muffled voice called out to me, and I couldn’t help but smile, shaking my head slightly. Of course Lockwood would be able to get Louisa to laugh. He was a pro at making people feel better.

“You really think I’m like her? Emma is my favorite of Ms. Austen’s characters,” Louisa said.

“Of course I do,” Lockwood replied, an airy, amused lightness to his voice.

“I guess she really isn’t that likeable though. She can come across as pretty selfish. I guess I
am
like her.”

“People only say that because they don’t know her. Her intentions are commendable. She wants the best for everyone she cares about. Sure, maybe she goes about it the wrong way, but she never tries to hurt anyone.”

“I don’t think anyone has ever misread me,” Louisa said. “I’ve always done and said exactly what I wanted. It’s funny. I could always fool the others—my oldest sister and the rest of the compound people—but never Tess. She always saw me for what I was.”

“Maybe she saw you for who you were, but now she gets to see who you become. Besides, I don’t think you’re selfish. And any girl who says exactly what she wants is appreciated by this man,” Lockwood teased.

Louisa laughed again. Louder. Stronger. “You’re a rare find! When I worked at Templeton, that’s the way they wanted us. Shy. Eyes down. Simpering like we didn’t know that we could want anything for ourselves at all. Even George…”

I gritted my teeth at the mention of his name, pressing my ear harder against the door. Louisa sniffled. I placed my hand against the door, wanting to comfort her but knowing I had to pull myself together. I had to be strong when I entered that room.

When I reached for the doorknob, Lockwood’s voice stopped me. “Shhh, it’s all right. I promise it’s going to be all right.”

“But it isn’t,” Louisa insisted. “Nothing will ever be all right again. Either I die or I become a mother. I’m not ready to be a mom. God, I was so dumb. Silly to believe all the pretty things he said to me. I didn’t care who said it; I was just so desperate to hear them.”

“What he did to you is one of the most vile, sickening things I can imagine one person doing to another. What right do any of us have to wreck people’s lives for our own personal gain?”

“He didn’t force me. I gave myself to him willingly. It’s my fault as much as his,” she said. “Even if I make it through this, I’m ruined. Who would want me? I gave myself to a chosen one.”

“You listen to me, Louisa,” Lockwood demanded. His voice carried a tone I had never heard before. “Maybe you were naive. Maybe you share the blame, but in no way should that bastard not be damned a thousand times for how he used you.”

“But—”

“No,” Lockwood interrupted. “I’m not done. I want you to understand one thing. You are not ruined. You are not beyond repair. When you make it through this, and you will, you deserve to find happiness just as much as anyone else who walks this world.”

I dropped my hand and took a step away from the door. I wouldn’t interrupt their moment. I knew what it meant to have a person like Lockwood in your life. A person who was there for you and guided you, not out of some assumed family obligation, but because he wanted to be there.

I walked into the night air. I walked and walked until I reached the border. I nodded to the guards, my father’s men, who patrolled. Unlike before, when we could go if we wanted, my father forbade anyone from leaving the community unless it was to report to one of the farms for work. I leaned against the gate and looked up at the stars.

Somewhere, James was just as trapped as I was.

I thought of the morning after we’d had sex. When it was over, we’d lain with each other, curled against one another, never beginning and never ending. We’d stayed like that till the sun began to rise.

James had reached down and pulled me off the ground. He’d worn a satisfied grin on his face. “Someone is mighty proud of himself,” I teased.

He’d laughed. It bounced through the forest, calling it awake. Readying it for the day. “I’m just insanely happy.”

I stood on the tips of my toes and kissed him gently on his scar. “I’m insanely happy too,” I whispered.

James looked down at me, and I was lost all over again. I would never tire of looking into those mismatched eyes. They didn’t make him different. They made him
him
. He chuckled as he reached over and pulled a leaf from my tangled hair. “They’ll know just by looking at you that we’ve been up to no good.”

“No good?” I said. “I thought it was very, very good.”

James growled and lifted me up into the air. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he pressed his lips hungrily against mine. I moved my hands to his hair, curling my fingers into it, attaching myself to him. I never wanted to let go. Every part of me ached to be touched by him, and every part of me ached to touch him right back.

“Do you know how much I love you?” he breathed into the base of my neck. His lips fluttered against my skin.

I nodded, kissing the top of his head. “As much as I love you.”

James slowly put my feet back on the ground. On the way down, I pressed my body against his. He cradled my face in his hands. “That will never change. No matter what.”

I looked deep into his eyes. “I know.” Because I did. It was one of life’s few assurances. I would always love James.

I pressed my lips once again to his scar. “I adore this,” I whispered, unable to hide the smile that seemed etched on my face all morning.

“Only you would love a man’s fault.” He chuckled.

“I love every part of you,” I replied, running my fingers down his chest.

“You’re enough to drive a man crazy,” he said. The tremble in his voice caused my toes to curl. I wanted him again. And again. And again.

My fingers traced the waist of his pants. “Tonight?” I said, knowing full well it was a promise I wouldn’t be able to keep.

James grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips. “Tonight,” he echoed.

As the sun climb higher into the sky, I knew our moment was coming to an end. James reached down and placed his hand over my heart. “Thank you,” he said.

“For what?” I asked, my voice choked with emotion.

“For everything.”

As the memory slipped away, I looked back up at the night sky. Praying and hoping that James knew how much I wanted to thank him, too.

For everything.