Crazy Rich Asians (50 page)

Eleanor walked her into one of the cavern-like lounges surrounding the main banquet
hall. She sank into a white mohair ottoman and inhaled deeply, as Francesca bent over
her in concern, the ruffles on her flame-orange ball gown billowing around her like
frothy waves. “Are you okay, Auntie Elle? You look like you’re having a panic attack.”

“I think I am. I need my Xanax. Can you get me some water? And please blow out all
those candles. The smell is giving me a migraine.”

Francesca quickly returned with a glass of water. Eleanor downed a few pills quickly
and sighed. “It’s worse than I thought. Far worse.”

“What do you mean?”

“Did you see that sapphire necklace on
that girl
?”

“How could I miss it? Yesterday she was wearing Ann Taylor Loft and today she’s in
an Elie Saab gown
from next season
and those sapphires.”

“It’s my mother-in-law’s. It used to belong to the Grand Duchess Zoya of St. Petersburg,
and now it’s been given to that girl. What’s more, the whole family seems to have
fallen in love with her, even my bitchy sister-in-law,” Eleanor said, almost choking
on the words.

Francesca looked grave. “Don’t worry, Auntie Elle. I promised
you I would see to it, and after tonight, Rachel Chu will wish she had never set foot
on this island!”

After the sixth and final course had been served, the lights in the great hall dimmed,
and a voice boomed out, “Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our very special guest!”
The live band struck up a tune, and the wall of glass behind the stage began to part.
The water in the lagoon started to glow an iridescent aquamarine before draining away
completely, and from the middle of the lagoon, the figure of a woman rose up as if
by magic. As she walked slowly toward the banquet hall, someone screamed, “Oh my goodness,
it’s Tracy Kuan!” The usually grimfaced vice premier of China jumped out of his seat
and began clapping like a man possessed, as everyone in the hall cheered and rose
to a standing ovation.

“Who’s that?” Rachel asked, amazed by the huge surge of excitement.

“It’s Tracy Kuan—she’s like the Barbra Streisand of Asia. Oh my God, I can die now!”
Oliver practically swooned, getting all choked up.

“Tracy Kuan is still alive?”
Cassandra Shang turned in astonishment to Jacqueline Ling. “The woman must be at
least a hundred and three by now, and she doesn’t look a day over forty! What on earth
does she do to herself?”

“Whale vomit from New Zealand. Works miracles on your face,” Jacqueline shot back
in dead seriousness.

Tracy Kuan sang Dolly Parton’s classic “I Will Always Love You,” with alternating
verses in English and Mandarin, as the lagoon outside began to shoot elaborate fountain
jets of water into the sky, synchronized to the music. Colin led Araminta onto the
dance floor, and the crowd oohed and aahed as they danced to the ballad. When the
song was over, all of the surfaces along the stage suddenly transformed into giant
LED panels, projecting rapid stop-motion video sequences as Tracy Kuan launched into
her classic dance hit “People Like Us.” The crowd roared in approval and rushed onto
the dance floor.

Oliver grabbed Cecilia Cheng by the arm and said, “You are under orders from your
grandmother to help me. I’m going to cut in on Alistair and Kitty, and you need to
keep your baby brother distracted. All I need is one song alone with Kitty.”

Kitty and Alistair were grinding against each other feverishly when Oliver and Cecilia
cut in, Alistair giving up Kitty reluctantly. How was he supposed to dirty dance with
his own sister? “You’ve got the best moves on the dance floor!” Oliver yelled into
Kitty’s ear, as Cecilia steered Alistair closer to the stage.

“I danced backup for Aaron Kwok. That’s how I got my start in the industry,” Kitty
yelled back to Oliver as she continued to shimmy wildly.

“I know! I recognized you the minute I saw you the other day. You were wearing a short
platinum blond wig in Aaron Kwok’s music video,” Oliver replied, expertly herding
her toward a strategic point on the dance floor without her realizing it.

“Wow! You have a good memory,” Kitty said, feeling flattered.

“I also remember you from your
other
video.”

“Oh, which one?”

“The all-girl back-door-action one,” Oliver said with a little wink.

Kitty didn’t miss a beat. “Oh, I’ve heard about that video. That girl supposedly looks
a lot like me,” she shouted back at Oliver with a smirk.

“Yes, yes, she’s your identical twin. Don’t worry, Kitty, your secret is safe with
me. I’m a survivor, just like you. And I know you didn’t work your pretty ass off,
quite literally I might add, to end up married to an upper-middle-class boy like my
cousin.”

“You’re wrong about me. I love Alistair!” Kitty protested.

“Of course you do. I never said you didn’t,” Oliver replied, spinning her right next
to Bernard Tai, who was dancing with Lauren Lee.

“Lauren Lee! My goodness, I haven’t seen you since last year’s Hong Kong art fair.
Where have you been hiding yourself?” Oliver exclaimed as he switched partners with
Bernard.

As Bernard began to ogle Kitty’s skimpily swathed décolletage, Oliver whispered into
Kitty’s ear, “Bernard’s father,
Dato’
Tai Toh Lui, has about four billion dollars. And he’s the only son.”

Kitty continued to dance as if she hadn’t heard a single word.

Seeking respite from the ear-splitting music, Astrid headed outdoors and climbed onto
one of the terraces overlooking a canopy
of treetops. Charlie noticed her leaving the banquet hall, and it took every ounce
of determination for him not to follow her. He was better off admiring her from afar,
in the way that he always had. Even when they were living together in London, he loved
nothing more than to watch her quietly as she drifted through a room in her inimitable
way. Astrid had always stood apart from any woman he had ever known. Especially tonight,
when the most stylish women in all of Asia were dressed to impress and drowning in
diamonds, Astrid outdid all of them by appearing in a flawlessly elegant cheongsam
and an exquisitely simple pair of chalcedony drop earrings. He knew from the tailoring
and intricately embroidered peacock feathers that the cheongsam had to be vintage,
likely one of her grandmother’s. What the hell, he didn’t care how she might feel—he
needed to see her again up close.

“Let me guess … not a fan of Tracy Kuan?” Astrid asked when she saw Charlie walking
up the steps onto the terrace.

“Not when I have no one to dance with.”

Astrid smiled. “I’d happily dance with you, but you know the press would have a field
day with that one.”

“Heh, heh—we’d wipe this wedding off the front pages tomorrow, wouldn’t we?” Charlie
laughed.

“Tell me, Charlie, back in our day, were we anything like Colin and Araminta?” Astrid
sighed, peering down at the fantastical harbor, its row of Grecian columns like leftover
props from the set of
Cleopatra
.

“I’d like to think we weren’t. I mean, kids these days … the spending is on a whole
other level.”

“ ‘
Spending Ah Gong’s
^†
money,’
as they say,” Astrid quipped.

“Yes. But at least we had the sense to feel naughty doing it. And I think that back
in those days when we lived in London, we were buying things we actually loved, not
things to show off,” Charlie mused.

“No one in Singapore gave a damn about Martin Margiela back then.” Astrid laughed.

“It’s a whole new world, Astrid.” Charlie sighed.

“Well, I hope Colin and Araminta live happily ever after,” Astrid said wistfully.

They were silent for a minute, taking in the calm of the rustling
trees mingling with the low bass thump coming from the great hall. Suddenly the relative
quiet was broken, as Asia’s bright young things flooded out onto the plaza in a raucous
conga line led by the indefatigable Tracy Kuan doing her best rendition of the B-52s’ “Love
Shack.”

“I can’t lie to you, Astrid. My wife
was
invited tonight, but she’s not here because we lead separate lives. We haven’t lived
together in more than two years,” Charlie said over the din, slumping onto one of
the Lucite benches.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Astrid said, jarred by his candor. “Well, if it makes you
feel any better, my husband isn’t really away on business. He’s in Hong Kong with
his mistress,” she blurted out before she could stop herself.

Charlie stared at her, incredulous. “Mistress? How could anyone in his right mind
be cheating on
you
?”

“That’s what I’ve been asking myself all night. All week actually. I had been suspecting
it for the past few months, but he finally came clean a week ago, before abruptly
moving out.”

“He moved to Hong Kong?”

“No, I don’t think so. Actually, what am I talking about—I have no idea. I think his
mistress lives there, and I think he went specifically this weekend just to spite
me. It was the one weekend where his absence would surely be noticed.”

“Fucker!”

“That’s not all. I think he fathered a child with this woman,” Astrid said sadly.

Charlie looked at her in horror. “You
think
? Or you know?”

“I don’t really know, Charlie. There are so many things about this whole affair that
don’t make sense to me at all.”

“Then why don’t you go to Hong Kong yourself and find out?”

“How can I? There’s no way I can run off to Hong Kong on my own to check up on him.
You know how it is—no matter where I stay, someone is bound to recognize me, and there
will be talk,” Astrid said, rather resigned to her fate.

“Well, why don’t we find out?”

“What do you mean
‘we’
?”

“I mean, I’m going to call my pilot right now to get the plane fueled up, and we can
be in Hong Kong in three hours. Let me help you. You can stay with me, and no one
will know you’re in Hong Kong. It’s unfortunate, but after my brother’s kidnapping
eight years
ago, I have access to the best private investigators in the city. Let’s get to the
bottom of this,” Charlie said eagerly.

“Oh Charlie, I can’t just leave in the middle of all this.”

“Why the hell not? I don’t see you out there shaking your ass in that conga line.”

Colin and Nick were standing by one of the alcoves, watching Peter Lee spin his daughter
around the dance floor. “I can’t quite believe I got married to that girl today, Nicky.
This whole day has been a complete fucking blur.” Colin sighed wearily.

“Yeah, it’s been quite surreal,” Nick admitted.

“Well, I’m glad you’ve been with me on this ride,” Colin said. “I know I haven’t been
easy on you the last few days.”

“Hey, what are friends for?” Nick said cheerily, putting his arm around Colin. He
was not about to let Colin get maudlin on his wedding night.

“I’m going to do you the favor of
not
asking you when your turn’s going to be, although I must say Rachel looks smashing
tonight,” Colin said, staring at her being whirled around by Mehmet.