Crazy Little Thing Called Love (37 page)

The old mixed with the new to create
something better. She hoped that somewhere in heaven her parents
could see it and that they’d smile at her changes. She was the best
of both of them after all.

Flipping the light off she went back
downstairs to the office and sank into the worn in leather chair.
The chair was definitely staying. So was the big wood desk that had
a half dozen Montgomery members names carved into the space
beneath. She’d add her Daddy’s to it soon and then her own.

In the meantime, she took a deep breath and
let her fingers fly over the keys. She’d always enjoyed writing and
in the past few days she’d found it helped with her loneliness and
with her grief. She had no idea what it would turn out to be.

She’d never written fiction so she’d started
with what she knew: the story of a stunning small town beauty and
the ranch hand that had loved her. She’d never gotten the real
story out of her father so she’d decided to make one of her own. It
helped distract her, to fill up the moments when all she really
wanted to do was hop in her car and drive over to the Triple Star
and see if Zach wanted to go for a ride on a dusty back road.

She couldn’t turn to Zach. Seeing him had
been bad enough the night before and then everything had spiraled
completely out of control. She’d fallen apart when he touched her
and then he’d kissed her with all the need she had been sure he
felt for her too but that had really just been wanting. He wanted
her. He admitted it but that didn’t mean he loved her.

It would have been so easy not to stay in
reality. It would have been easy to let him kiss her, to let him
touch her and take her. It would have been easy to make love to him
but she’d known she was the only one it would have been lovemaking
to and she liked herself too much to believe a lie that big. So
she’d stopped him and gotten away in the nick of time.

She’d run away from him again just like she’d
run away from him that first night at Molly’s wedding. And oh he’d
looked angry again, so angry. Except this time she knew how bad his
rage could be, she’d seen it up close and she hadn’t been able to
stop herself from offering him comfort.

He was so big, so strong but that kind of
anger ran deep and all she’d wanted to do was make it better for
him. She hated that her heart wanted to hold out hope that because
she’d been able to calm him with a word and a touch that she’d
somehow helped. She hated that she hoped Riley had found him and
kept him calm after she upset him all over again. She hated that
she wanted to call and check on him so she punched the keys on the
laptop too hard and let her frustrations pour into her much
healthier distraction from her miserable life.

The doorbell rang but she ignored it. Arlene
would answer it and see who it was, probably Maddie coming to find
out why she’d run out on their girls night. The doorbell rang again
and she frowned as her fingers stopped moving on the keyboard.

“Arlene?” She called.

No response. She groaned and pulled herself
out of the chair. The older woman had probably gone out to the
bunkhouse to fix lunch. She padded barefoot to the front door and
pulled it open with a welcoming smile that died on her lips the
second she caught a glimpse of her visitor.

Zach was standing on the front porch at
Montgomery Oaks. Instead of his standard polo or pearl-snap shirt
he wore only a slightly wrinkled gray t-shirt with his blue jeans,
a Rangers baseball cap covered his head and shielded his eyes. It
took her a second to realize it was exactly what he was wearing the
first time she’d ever seen him.

It’s what he’d been wearing when he pulled
over onto the side of the road to help her with a flat tire and
she’d wanted to jump him for being so big and strong and sexy. Her
stomach knotted of its own accord and her feet itched to do just
that now. She stood firm instead, even when he said her name in
that gravel tinged voice that made her insides shaky.

“Bluebell.”

She glared at him, “What are you doing here
Zach?”

“Invite me in.”

“No.”

“Please.” He asked softly, “Please hear me
out and then I’ll go.”

She held firm. She shook her head. She was
about to tell him just where he could go. She’d tried hearing him
out last night and it had only confused everything more. She
couldn’t let him into her house when she was struggling so hard to
get him out of her heart. She was set on telling him all of that
but when she opened her mouth to say the words he reached up and
pulled the baseball cap off and what came out instead was a
gasp.

“Oh God…” She moved forward on pure instinct
and her hand defied her by gliding across that rugged jaw line she
knew so well to touch at the black and blue bruises marring his
handsome face, “Zach what happened?”

“Please, invite me in.” His voice was low and
he closed his eyes and gulped in air when she touched him.

“I’m sorry. That probably hurt.” She
immediately dropped her hand away and stepped back.

His lids flew open and serious green eyes met
hers, “No. It didn’t hurt I just… I can’t touch you yet. I need to
say something. Please, invite me in.”

Her brow furrowed but her traitorous body
betrayed her again by stepping aside. He looked so serious. He
looked broken. Something had happened and he’d come to her and as
much as she wanted to turn her back on him to protect herself, he
looked like he needed a friend and she still loved him too much to
say no.

He walked three steps into the house, turned
and faced her as she shut the door behind them. She leaned against
it and watched him warily. Her eyes tried to catalog if there was
other damage but his hands seemed clean, only the giant swelling
bruise around his left eye spoke to the violence she’d sensed
behind his anger.

“When you got in your car and left last
night…” His hands clenched, “All I wanted to do was tear something
apart. I was so angry, so angry I wanted to destroy something, kill
something. I wanted to take it out on somebody for how awful I was
feeling.”

“Who’d you fight with?”

“Myself mostly.” A small smile tugged at one
corner of his mouth, “I knew I was the only one that deserved a
beating because I was the one that hurt you so I went back to the
ranch and goaded Devin into punching me.”

Her mouth gaped open, “Your brother did that
to you?”

“Faster than I ever expected, I didn’t even
see it coming. Turns out he’s been pretty pissed with me himself
lately and I gave him an opening.” He snorted. “Guess the temper
really is genetic.”

“That’s… crazy.”

“That’s brotherhood.” He shrugged, “Anyway,
the point is, not even the pain in my head competes with the pain
that is tearing me open from knowing I hurt you. I care about you
Bluebell. I hate myself for hurting you.”

Her heart gave a little leap but she chained
it down. Saying he cared about her wasn’t the same as saying he
loved her. She cared about lots of people that she didn’t love,
some she barely liked. She couldn’t twist his words into something
they weren’t.

“When I saw you in the bar last night, all I
wanted was to go back to the way things had been. I wanted to just
pick up where we left off.”

“We can’t.”

“I know. I know that now.”

“We were supposed to be a one-night stand. It
was never supposed to get complicated.” She repeated the words he’d
used when she made her all too important confession and prayed her
voice didn’t waver.

“It wasn’t one night though, it was two and
then three and then longer and you were still there and I still
wanted you there. I still want you. I didn’t want you to
leave.”

“Don’t.” She shook her head, “You know why I
had to and you didn’t exactly fight me when you loaded me up in
your truck, dropped me on the front porch and burned rubber the
other direction.”

“I know and I’m sorry for that too. I’m sorry
for so many things. I’m sorry I lied to you about the ranch. I
should have told you what I knew about your dad and…”

“No. You shouldn’t have.” She held up her
hand to stop him. “I thought about it and you were right. It wasn’t
your place to say anything. My daddy should have told me. If that’s
what you’re here to apologize for again… you don’t need to do it.
You can go and your reputation of not lying to women will be
intact.”

“I’m not worried about my reputation.” He
sighed heavily and twisted the baseball cap in his hands, “I’m
sorry for making you cry last night.”

“Oh…” She stared at the floor. She really
wished he hadn’t seen that. She wished she’d been stronger, been
able to hold them back but she’d shed tears for Zach far more
easily than she’d ever shed them for any man other than her
father.

“I never wanted to be the reason you cried. I
don’t ever want to make you cry again.”

Her heart clenched and she had to stifle
another round at his softness, at his goodness. He’d come to
apologize again. He just kept apologizing and being the nice, sweet
guy she was in love with. She had to get away from him.

“Then you have to go, the only way I don’t
cry over you anymore is if you give me some space to get over you.
I told you that I just need some time and then we can be friends.
It’ll be fine.” She backed up to the door and was just reaching for
the knob when he spoke again.

“I don’t want to be your friend
Bluebell.”

God he was trying to kill her. He’d already
ripped her heart out. Now he wanted to dance on it?

“I can’t be your friend because I’m in love
with you.”

She spun around from where she’d turned away
from him so she could see his face, “What?”

“I’m in love with you.” He took a deep
breath, let it out, “I’m thirty-six years old and I fell in love
for the first time and what I really hope is the last because I
have this feeling I won’t ever be happy again if you don’t love me
back.”

She stared at him like he’d lost his mind and
her hand came up to cover her gaping mouth, “Zach? Did I just hear
you say that you’re in love with me?”

“Yeah.” He nodded uncomfortably, “I did. I
do. I just… I need you to say something. Say something but please
God don’t say you’re sorry.”

Her hand did a good job of covering the hint
of a smile that tried to curl at her lips.

“Please say you still love me Bluebell
because I’m in love with you and I can’t bear to think of how
pitifully awful my life would be if you weren’t in it. You drive me
crazy. You frustrate the hell out of me sometimes but you also make
me laugh and calm me down and make me feel whole and happy. I
always knew my life was missing something. I thought it was freedom
from the ranch and responsibility but it wasn’t, it was you.
Please… say something.”

“I love you too Zach. I didn’t mean for it to
happen but you were there for me. You took care of me and let me
lean on you and gave me everything I needed even when I didn’t know
what it was I needed sometimes.”

“I’ll always give you everything. I’ll always
be there for you.”

“And I’ll be there for you,” She lifted her
hand and gently touched the bruise again, this time knowing his
reaction came from needing her touch so badly, “I’ll be there for
you so you don’t have to do everything alone. I’ll be there to calm
you down and drive you crazy all over again.”

“I like your kind of crazy Bluebell
Montgomery Carter.” He smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear
and gave her a light kiss on the lips. “I’m sorry I pushed you away
that night. I was just scared because I had no idea what I was
feeling. You were supposed to be like all the others so I reacted
like I would have if you were one of them but you weren’t, not from
the minute you accused me of being a serial killer and made me
laugh and really feel for somebody other than my family for the
first time in my life.”

“Ax murderer.”

“Huh?” His hands cupped her face, his thumbs
stroking back to her ears in a torment that she’d missed more than
she ever realized.

“I accused you of being an ax murderer, not a
serial killer.”

“You just can’t help it can you? You have to
correct me.” He grinned.

“Yep.”

“So damn frustrating.” He chuckled as his
lips pressed against hers again.

“You should stop talking to me then.”

“Exactly.”

He claimed her mouth in a deep, out of
control kiss. He claimed her mouth and her body and her heart and
her soul. She knew then that coming home wasn’t just about the land
or the ranch or Montgomery Oaks. It wasn’t just about Fate or even
Texas. It was also about Zach because with Zach, she was really and
truly home.

“Zach?” She whispered against his lips.

“Still talking baby?” He nipped at her
earlobe with a husky chuckle.

“When did you fall in love with me?”

“As crazy as it sounds, as crazy as it feels,
as crazy as it is…” He punctuated each statement with a kiss, “I
think I fell in love with you the second I saw you in that ugly
orange bridesmaid dress.”

“You’re right, that is crazy.”

Jess Bryant has always been a writer. As a
little girl she spent hours in her room putting pen to paper and
creating stories. She’s been reading and writing romance novels
since she first stole a book from her aunt’s Harlequin collection
when she was thirteen years old. She earned a degree in Public
Relations from the University of Oklahoma and now lives in Dallas,
Texas with her husband and two dogs. When she’s not writing, Jess
can usually be found curled up with a glass of wine and a good book
or yelling at the television during sporting events with friends
and family. For more information on Jess and upcoming releases,
contact her at [email protected].