Authors: Cayce Poponea
“It was my pleasure. Have you tried it yet?” He had gotten most of the chocolate off his face, but he still had a little on the center of his chin.
“You have a little...” I pointed at my own chin. He wiped several times, but had managed to miss the smear of chocolate.
“Good Lord, Grant,” I fussed as I reached over and licked the tip of a clean napkin and began to rub his chin. Once it was clean, I attempted to use a piece of dry napkin to finish. However, my finger slipped and I touched his bare lip and instantly gasped. The feel of our skin touching was overwhelming. It was as if I was touching a live battery. It wasn’t painful, just the opposite, actually, and it scared me by the way it made me feel. I looked into his blue eyes. This close, I could see he had golden areas around the outer sides and light flecks running sporadically around the pupils. I could smell the sugar and chocolate on his lips.
“I’m so sorry.” I quickly turned and scrambled to my office, Peyton securely in my arms. I closed the door and placed Peyton on the floor. This was ridiculous, he was just a man. A man made of skin and bones, and right now he shook me to my very core. I took in a deep breath and that was when my poor baby started to sneeze. I opened my door and sought out my father.
“Dad, can you take Peyton home? She’s fighting off a cold and I don’t want her to be miserable or get any sicker.”
Peggy took Peyton from my arms, her half-eaten cookie still tightly gripped in her hand. I kissed her cheek and was happy she was still fever free, at least for now. She tucked her head against Peggy’s breast and dropped her cookie. Dad was quick to clean up the mess and wrapped his arm around Peggy and his granddaughter.
“I’ll pick her up as soon as I’m finished here.”
“She’ll be fine, Natalie,” Peggy spoke over her shoulder.
The Board was quite pleased with the final numbers. We’d had several of the small communities around Crain’s Landing attend and sign up for the internet borrowing service we now offered. I was exhausted and anxious to get back to my sick baby. I left my SUV running as I parked outside of my father’s house. Peggy led me back to the den where a sleeping Peyton was bundled up on the sofa. She had plugged in a cool mist humidifier as Peyton had begun to cough. Thankfully Peyton was still feverless, and I hoped this was just a simple cold.
Sunday was spent lying in bed with Peyton; placating a fussy child with promises of cartoons and popsicles. As afternoon approached, her coughing had increased and I decided it was time to use that cell number I had been given and called Dr. Crain. He agreed that since she was feverless it was more than likely a simple cold. He prescribed some cough syrup that my father went to the pharmacy and picked up for us. Dad stayed for a little while as Peyton conned him into an episode of one of her favorite shows. Dr. Crain called and checked on her right after dinnertime. The cough syrup had really helped and she was sleeping peacefully.
Just after four o’clock on Monday morning, though, I woke to my baby screaming at the top of her lungs. I looked at her only to see vomit covering her tiny body and the sheets surrounding her. Her breathing was irregular and she was pulling at her ears. She was also hotter than a firecracker. I jumped out of bed and took her into my arms. I headed to the bathroom to get the baby thermometer. Less than five minutes later, I was gathering my purse and heading for my car. Peyton’s temperature was 103.5°F and I didn’t like the wet sound of her breathing. She had stopped crying and was now lethargic with a glassiness to her eyes. I pulled into the emergency room parking lot and took her in through the double doors.
As I waited for the nurse to return to her desk, I looked around and noticed two other people sitting in the chairs. One an older lady, who was holding her shoulder. The second an older gentleman, who appeared to be sleeping. I pulled out my phone and quickly sent Ashley a text, telling her I would most likely be very late coming in, if I made it in at all. She responded and asked if everything was all right. I told her Peyton was sick and I was at the hospital. She replied to keep her posted.
“He isn’t here.” The clipped voice behind me brought my attention back to the nurses’ desk. Trixie was standing with her hands on her hips, glaring at me and a whimpering Peyton.
“I don’t care, I need to have Peyton looked at.”
The redhead from the other day appeared from the set of double doors that led to the emergency room. “You’ll have to wait like everyone else. Just because you’re fucking Grant, doesn’t give you special treatment.” Trixie began typing away on her computer and then told me to have a seat.
“Can you give me a ballpark figure of how long the wait is?”
Sophia sneered at me and then responded, “A couple of hours.” She then looked at Trixie, smirking. I debated on what to do. I could sit here and wait for them to see her or I could drive to Charleston and be seen quicker. With a look to the pale, tear-stained face of my baby girl, I rose from the chair and headed out of the emergency room.
I sent a text to Ashley confirming I would not be in today and that I was on my way to Charleston. I was about to open my car door when a soft hand stilled my movement. “Natalie, why are you leaving?”
I looked up to see the warm eyes of Martin. I instantly felt the tension leave my body. “I’m sorry, Martin. The wait time in there is too long. Peyton’s fever is over 103°F and her breathing is funny. I’m driving to Charleston.”
Martin took a look at Peyton, pulled his stethoscope from his pocket, and listened to her chest, all while telling her how happy he was to see her and how he was going to make her feel better really soon. He then took her from my arms, walking swiftly back into the emergency room. “Follow me, Natalie, this isn’t a waiting situation.”
Trixie obviously didn’t notice the door open this time, as I clearly heard her say, “That was too pathetic, using her ugly-assed kid to try and trap him.”
Martin continued past her, shouting, “Get the director of nurses down here,
stat
!”
I ignored Trixie and Sophia, following Martin down the hall and into a room. He gently laid Peyton on the bed and placed a cuff around her tiny arm. Another nurse, who I had never seen before, was at his side and he began to give her orders I didn’t understand. Martin moved swiftly around the room. A large machine was brought in and the technician hung a heavy apron around me.
“Is there any chance you could be pregnant, Ms. Reid?”
I looked to the tech and muttered a soft, “No.”
I heard the sounds of several beeps and the sliding of metal on metal. I tuned it all out as I stood beside my daughter, whose eyes were now closed, her cheeks bright red and her skin pale. I looked over to the other side of the bed as Martin was finishing starting an IV, while the tech with the machine left the room. I hadn’t even noticed they had taken the heavy apron off me.
“Natalie?” My father’s voice sounded from behind the now closed curtain. I immediately pulled it back and threw myself into his waiting arms.
“Daddy, I...I...”
“Shush, baby girl. Dr. Crain is taking very good care of her.” His arms wrapped me tightly and I melted into them. I buried my face into his chest, the smell of Old Spice and newspaper filled my nose. As a little girl, I found so much comfort shielded in his embrace. Nothing I ever did was too big for his love to fix.
“I got here as soon as I heard. What are her O
₂
stats?” The whooshing sound of the curtain being drawn back startled me slightly. Grant’s velvet voice filled the room. I didn’t look up; this was no time for my hormones or any competition for his attention.
“They’re not good, Grant, even on one hundred percent oxygen. Her lungs are full of fluid.” Martin’s words grasped my attention and I removed myself from my father’s chest.
I moved closer to the bed. “Martin, what’s going on?” My voice was trembling with fear.
“Natalie, I think Peyton has pneumonia. I want to see the x-rays and the blood work first, but she shows all the signs.” I looked to Grant who was listening to Peyton’s lungs with a frown on his face.
“But she was just coughing last night.” I shook my head back and forth. “She was playing with Savannah on Saturday, dancing around the library with Kaylin. Feeding you cookies!” I tossed at Grant. I knew pneumonia could be very serious to a child; even to the healthiest adult it could render them gravely ill. My baby was just that, a small child. How would her tiny body fight this off?
“I’ve seen this particular strand before. It’s slow to grow in the body, but once it matures, it spreads fast.”
I felt my father’s hands on my shoulders. My eyes closed as a lone tear fell down my face. I didn’t care who saw it, or what they thought about me. Peyton was my world; it was my responsibility to keep her safe. I felt so powerless, I knew nothing of medicine.
“Dr. Crain, her temperature has increased to 104°F.” The young nurse spoke from the opposite side of the bed. Grant began to pull white bags off the shelf behind him. He never looked at me, just kept working. He then lifted each of Peyton’s arms and placed one of the white bags under them, then did the same between her legs, and under her knees. Peyton never moved and she never opened her eyes. My tears increased.
“We have to get her fever down, Natalie. Grant is trying an old-fashioned method of cold packs at her pulse points.” Grant stood back and listened to her lungs again. It was then he looked up at me.
“Natalie, I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for her. I was called in shortly after I got off the phone with you. I had to stand by for a surgery on a young boy who was in a car accident.”
My father responded before I could. “Now, Grant, there was no way of predicting this. Just yesterday she was watching her cartoons and giggling.”
I closed my eyes and went back to that moment when my dad had brought the cough medicine. She had been giggling at Ariel on the screen. I wanted to go back to that moment. If only I knew then what I knew now.
Martin was now across the room looking at the x-rays. Grant stood beside him and was pointing to an area and circling it. “Natalie, the tests confirm what I suspected. Peyton has pneumonia. We’re going to admit her and do everything we can to make her better.”
I couldn’t say anything, just nodded my head. My father held me in his arms as the nurse instructed us they would be taking her to the ICU. As I walked down the hall, I could hear mumbled voices. As I turned the corner to get on the elevator, I saw Carolyn with her finger pointed directly into Trixie’s face. Carolyn’s face was red and you could tell she was angry. She noticed us waiting for the elevator and rushed to my side.
“Now, Natalie, don’t you worry. I’ve given strict instructions to my two guys that they
will
make her all better. Peyton hasn’t had one of Nana Carolyn’s birthday parties yet.”
I couldn’t respond to her. I could only see my baby lying on that bed, eyes closed with tubes in her arms and the plastic oxygen tent covering her face and chest. As her warm hands held mine, however, the feeling of unconditional love spread over me, causing my inner will to crumble. There was no holding back the river of tears as they poured from my eyes. “I c-can't fix it.” I cried into her shoulder. “It’s my job to f-fix this, but I-I can't.” Gut-wrenching sobs rendered me unable to speak. Warm, strong arms surrounded me, keeping me together and not sprawled on the tile floor.
Carolyn pulled back enough to see my face, the assurance I found there in abundance. “You can’t, but Grant can. Let him do what he was trained to do.”
The elevator ride was quiet as my thoughts were of the last time Peyton had been in the hospital, the day she was born. I had woken up in the middle of the night because I was thirsty. My back had begun to hurt, but that night, it was really hurting. I went to crawl back into bed after getting a drink of water when a sharp pain ripped through my body and a gush of water fell to the floor. Ten hours later, I had this tiny miracle sleeping in my arms.
The waiting room for the ICU was empty with the exception of myself and now Peggy. Peggy had come up once my father had to go to work and she was sleeping in one of the other chairs. I had tried to sleep, but I woke up every few minutes, terrified I had missed something. I had closed my eyes once again when I heard voices and soft steps walking down the hall.
“I heard that Trixie basically pushed her out of the ER,” the first younger lady whispered.
“That’s so sad, tossing your nursing career out the window for a guy. I mean Dr. Grant
is
handsome, but he isn’t worth losing your nursing license over,” the second older lady replied.
“I heard Ms. Reid doesn’t give him the time of day. Can you believe that, Susan?”
“Oh, I can believe that. Ms. Reid strikes me as the type who’s independent and doesn’t feel the need for a man around the house.”
“Well, Susan, she obviously had need of a man at one point. I mean, she does have a baby after all.”
“That’s what I’d like to know; where’s the father to this baby?”
I sighed as I thought of a response in my head.
“Oh, Susan, he isn’t worth the energy to even think about.”