Cowboy with a Cause (5 page)

His teasing chased away her dismal thoughts.

“My sister, Cherry, used to say that we all make a choice each morning. We choose to either be happy or be sad. She was the happiest person I ever knew,” he said with a touch of wistfulness.

“You miss her,” Melanie said softly.

“Every day. And I’m sure you miss your mother.”

Melanie took a sip of her coffee and leaned back in her chair. “I had a lot of time to prepare myself for Mom’s passing. She was sick for a long time, but yes, I miss her.”

“And what about your father?”

“He checked out of our lives when I was two. I wouldn’t know him if he walked right up to me and said hello.”

“He doesn’t know what he missed out on,” Adam replied.

She smiled and suddenly she’d had enough. She felt slightly overwhelmed by the clatter of dishes, the chatter of people and Adam’s kindness.

By the time they left the café, twilight had fallen, deepening shadows beneath the trees and around buildings. Adam offered to push her and she relented and allowed him to do so.

“I should be wheeling myself to work off some of that chicken fried steak and potatoes,” she said as she leaned back in the chair and relaxed. “But, to be perfectly honest, I’m completely exhausted.”

She was aware that it was more of a mental exhaustion than a physical one. Her mouth ached from all the smiling she’d done and after months of near isolation she felt overstimulated and edgy.

“You did really well for your first time out.”

She thought she felt his breath on the back of her neck, a provocative warmth that was oddly soothing. “It was nice to be out,” she admitted.

“You have more friends than you think you have, Melanie. I wouldn’t be surprised if your phone starts ringing off the hook with all kinds of invitations.”

“I’m not ready to become a social butterfly just yet. Tonight was nice, but I want to take it all slow. I’m still adjusting to this darned chair and all the limitations in my life.”

“The only limitations you have are those you put in your own mind.”

She bit her bottom lip to keep from snapping at him. Easy for him to say. He was walking on his two feet. He could run after a toddler who was chasing a ball. He could dance a two-step. There were so many things he could do that she would never do again.

She was grateful when they reached her front door. All she wanted now was the privacy of her own room. Adam unlocked the door and turned to look at her, and in the purple glow of evening she thought she saw a whisper of something inviting in his eyes. It was a look that said he wouldn’t mind a kiss and she caught her breath as he half bent down toward her.

For just a minute she felt like a young woman coming home from a date, her chest filled with the anticipation of a first sweet kiss, a promise of something more to come.

She quickly backed up. She didn’t want him to kiss her, because she realized she wanted him to kiss her. She wondered what his mouth would taste like, how his lips might play on her own. It would be the height of stupidity to allow a kiss to take place between them.

“Thanks, Adam,” she said, surprised to find her voice lower, deeper than usual. “You can go on upstairs and I’ll lock up from here.”

He snapped straight up and stepped back from her. “Then I’ll just say good-night,” he said. With a nod of his head he turned and disappeared into the house.

Melanie pushed herself over the threshold, then turned her wheelchair around to close the front door. For just a moment she remained with the door open, drawing in deep breaths of the cool, autumn-scented night air.

All in all the outing had been a huge success. She’d been surprised to discover that Jim Collins was a deputy and Denver Walton was a mechanic and had been dating Maddy Billings for a long time. She’d dated both men briefly in high school, but she hadn’t gotten serious about anyone. Dance had always taken precedence over boys and dating.

Even when she was living in New York City, there had been little time for dating. Life had pretty much revolved around auditions, rehearsals and performances. Most of the time a bunch of the cast of a particular show went out in a group to grab a bite to eat or have a few drinks or just unwind after a performance.

She’d had a relationship with a male dancer for three months, but different schedules and locations had eventually ended things between them.

Melanie hadn’t been in love with him, nor had he been in love with her. Still, it had been nice for a while to have somebody to talk to, somebody to make her feel desirable, not just as a fellow dancer but as a woman. He’d taken away some of the loneliness that often set in when the stage lights went out for the night.

She started to close the door but paused as a movement just behind the big tree in the front yard caught her eye. She tightened her grip on the doorknob. Was there somebody there? Was somebody hiding?

“Hello?” she called softly.

Darkness had quickly usurped the last gasp of day and a sudden shiver raced down her spine. The person who had killed two waitresses who worked at the Cowboy Café could possibly still be roaming the streets.

Was it possible he’d changed his victim profile and now had her in his sights? She narrowed her eyes, trying to see what or who had moved and caught her gaze.

Nothing.

She slammed the door closed and carefully locked it.

Silly,
she thought as she wheeled herself into her bedroom. It must have been all the talk about the murders that had prompted the faint whisper of fear that pumped her heart a little too fast.

She was no better than silly Tilly, seeing bogeymen in shadows. She’d obviously mistaken a swaying branch or a cat for something more ominous. Still, as she got into bed, she realized that the wind hadn’t been blowing and the figure she’d thought she saw was far too big to be a cat.

Chapter 5

H
e’d wanted to kiss her. He’d wanted to kiss her so badly, it had ached in his bones an hour later, when he got into bed. And when he woke up the next morning, he still wanted to kiss her.

Adam pulled himself out of bed before dawn. He showered and dressed and then left the house, deciding to head to the ranch and take a sunrise horseback ride.

He had enjoyed his time with Melanie too much, had almost crossed the line she’d drawn in the sand when he moved in. Tenant and landlord, that was the only relationship she wanted with him, and if he screwed that up, he’d be out of a place to live and he wouldn’t get a chance to spend more time with her.

The sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon as he reached the ranch. He went directly to the stables and saddled up his favorite mount, Jasper, and took off across the pasture.

He was attracted to Melanie like he’d never been attracted to a woman. He searched inside his heart, wondering if his fascination with her was simply pity for a woman whose life course had been halted abruptly by tragedy.

But no matter how hard he looked, he couldn’t find pity there. When he’d gazed at the photos on the living room wall, he’d admired the talented woman she’d been, but he was far more intrigued by the woman she was now, the woman she would become as she sought a new way of living.

In the weeks and months ahead he looked forward to seeing how much character she had, if she had the strength to truly rise above what had happened to her. He hoped so; he wanted that for her.

He rode at a sedate gait for about a half an hour, his mind replaying the night out with Melanie. Finally he turned around to go back to the stables. He gave Jasper more rein and the horse responded by breaking into a brisk run.

The cool morning air emptied his head of all thoughts as he simply enjoyed the scent of pasture and autumn that rode a slight breeze.

The Benson ranch was very profitable and belonged to Sam, Adam and Nick. The profits were split between the three, providing a very good living for all of them. At the moment Sam’s money was tied up in his defense, and Adam had insisted Nick take a bigger cut as he was the one taking care of the ranch now. Still, it provided a good lifestyle for Adam, although he’d always been rather frugal with his money. Without a wife or family, without even a girlfriend, there had been few things to spend his money on, so most of it had been put into savings.

When he reached the stables, Adam dismounted and gave Jasper a quick rubdown. He headed for the house in the distance, not ready to go back into town yet.

By this time he knew his brother’s family would all be awake and hopefully Courtney would be in the middle of fixing some kind of breakfast.

The front door was unlocked, and he opened it and stepped into the foyer, which smelled of frying bacon and fresh-brewed coffee. “Anyone home?”

“Unc Dam!” Garrett came running toward him, diaper in hand. He was clad in a pajama top and nothing else.

“Hey, buddy. Aren’t you supposed to be wearing that instead of carrying it?” Adam said with a grin.

Nick came chasing after Garrett, a look of frustration on his face. “He’s the slipperiest worm on the planet.” He scooped up the half-naked child. “Courtney’s in the kitchen. Help yourself to the coffee, and I’ll be in once I wrangle this little bull and get a diaper on him.”

He disappeared down the hallway with a giggling Garrett as Adam headed for the kitchen. There were times when Adam envied his brother for finding love and for having a son. He admired the fact that Nick had never doubted his own sanity, had somehow managed to put Cherry’s death and Sam’s crime behind him to move forward to a happy place. Adam was still seeking his happy place.

As he entered the kitchen, Courtney turned to face him, a bright smile lighting her face. “I knew there was a reason that I decided to fry up some extra bacon this morning.”

“Nothing like an unexpected guest for breakfast,” Adam said as he walked over to the coffeemaker and poured himself a cup of the fragrant brew.

“Maybe unexpected, but never unwelcome,” Courtney replied. “I heard you were out last night with your landlady.” She began cracking eggs into a large mixing bowl.

“Wow. News travels fast.” He sat down at the table and took a sip of his coffee.

“I heard it from a friend who heard it from a friend who said the two of you were eating dinner together at the café.” She flashed him a wry grin. “So was it a date?”

“No,” he replied hurriedly. “It was just an outing. I built a ramp from her front door to the sidewalk and this was her first trip out since she went into the wheelchair seven months ago.”

Courtney turned to the skillet and flipped over several slices of bacon. “How did she do?”

“She was a little nervous, but she did just fine.” Adam took a second sip of his coffee and thought about the night before. “I think it was a bit overwhelming for her and she was pretty exhausted by the time I took her home.”

Once again he thought of that moment when they’d been on her porch, when he’d wanted nothing more than to taste her lips. She’d just looked so darned kissable.

It was crazy. He’d known her for less than a week but he already somehow felt invested in her, in her life. He told himself his desire to kiss her had been nothing more than some strange phenomenon brought on by the moonlight and the way her blue blouse made her eyes appear so soulful and her lips look soft and yielding.

It had just been a wild moment, probably never to be repeated, he thought. In any case she had dismissed him quickly, as if she’d sensed what he was thinking and wanted no part of it.

“Adam?”

Courtney’s voice penetrated his thoughts and he looked at her.

“I asked you if you wanted one piece of toast or two.”

“One is fine,” he replied.

Within minutes Nick and a fully dressed Garrett entered the room and breakfast was served. The food was great and the conversation was pleasant, with Garrett offering comic relief with his childish antics.

“I was planning on driving to Oklahoma City this morning to see a man who has a champion bull for sale. Want to take the ride with me?” Nick asked Adam.

It was a two-hour drive into the city, but Adam certainly had no other plans for the day. “Sure. It’s a nice day for a drive.”

“And I’d like the company,” Nick replied.

An hour later, Adam and Nick were in Nick’s truck and headed down the highway. Nick and Adam had never been particularly close. Adam had spent most of his time growing up in Sam’s company, while Nick and Cherry had bonded together as the youngest siblings.

Cherry’s death in the car accident had sent them all reeling, but Sam’s arrest had nearly destroyed both of the brothers who remained behind to pick up the pieces. Nick had dealt with it by leaving town and going to Texas to work on a friend’s ranch. And Adam, well, there had been those bottles of booze to ease his pain.

“So are you finding what you are looking for living in town?” Nick asked as he rolled down his window to let in the cool autumn air.

“I’m not sure exactly what I’m looking for,” Adam replied honestly.

“You know there’s always a place for you at the ranch.”

“I know that, and I appreciate it, but it’s just not where I want to be right now. I’m thinking about talking to Cameron about training or whatever I’d need to do to maybe become a deputy.”

Nick shot him a look of surprise, which quickly faded and turned into a grin. “You always did like watching all those cop shows on TV and trying to solve the crime before the TV cops did. I imagine Cameron could use more help.” He hesitated a moment and then continued, “Does this have something to do with Sam?”

It was Adam’s turn to look at his brother in surprise. “What do you mean?”

“Oh, you know, you feel guilty about what he did and so you’re going into law enforcement to ease some of that guilt and prove to the town that at least you’re a good guy.”

Adam considered his brother’s words and then shook his head negatively. “Nah, you’re looking way too deep. It’s just something that’s always been in the back of my mind, even before Sam was arrested. The ranch had started to feel like a ball and chain. I never loved it like you and Sam did. I just felt the weight of responsibility of doing a job I didn’t really love.”

“It’s important to find your passion. Ranching has always been what I wanted to do, and reconnecting with Courtney was a gift. Between those two and Garrett, I’ve found a real passion for living each day.”

“And I envy you that,” Adam admitted.

Nick flashed him a quick grin. “You become a deputy and you’ll have to fight off half the women in town. You know women love men in uniform.”

Adam laughed and that seemed to set the tone for the remainder of the afternoon. Adam had forgotten how much he enjoyed his little brother’s company, how humorous Nick could be, how easy he was to be around.

The drive to Oklahoma City seemed to fly by as the two talked about everything from their childhood to Cherry’s death and to Sam’s arrest.

“Have you talked to him lately?” Adam asked.

“Last week. His trial has been set for next month. Have you talked to him?”

Adam shook his head. “Not since the night he was arrested. I can’t. I’m still so angry at him.” He reached up and swiped a hand through his hair. Thoughts of Sam always made him feel slightly anxious.

“He’s sick, Adam. Maybe it was the stress of him taking care of all of us for so long after Mom and Dad died, but Cherry’s death drove him to a dark place with a sickness that simmered inside him for a long time.”

“Yeah, I know. But we were so close. I should have sensed that something was off with him,” Adam protested.

“You have to stop blaming yourself for not seeing it, for not sensing it. Sam alone is responsible for his actions, but it wouldn’t hurt for him to know that you still care about him. He asks about you each time I talk to him.”

Adam’s heart squeezed tight. He’d loved Sam, at least the man Sam had been before he tried to kill somebody. “I’m just not ready to talk to him yet,” he finally replied. “He calls occasionally but I don’t accept the charges.”

By that time they had reached the ranch where the bull was for sale. The ranch looked forlorn, with a barn that threatened to bite the dust beneath a light breeze and stock that was small and underfed.

Earl Waylan talked up his animals with an arrogance that bordered on obnoxious. The bull was small and timid and nothing that Nick was interested in buying.

“That bull looked like he’d run in the opposite direction if he saw a heifer,” Nick said when they were back in the truck. He cast Adam a wry grin. “Kind of reminded me of you.”

Adam laughed. “I’m not timid of heifers. It’s women who freak me out just a little bit.”

Nick grinned. “What about Melanie Brooks? Does she freak you out just a little bit?”

A vision of Melanie filled Adam’s head. Melanie, with her angel blond hair and haunting blue eyes, with her occasional sharp tongue and whisper of vulnerability. She definitely touched him.

“A little bit,” Adam finally replied. “Although definitely in a good way.”

“This isn’t some desire of yours to help a helpless woman?” Nick asked.

“Melanie definitely isn’t some poor, helpless woman. She takes care of herself just fine. She’s intelligent and beautiful and I’ve got to admit there’s something about her that draws me in.”

“I thought you were the confirmed bachelor of Grady Gulch.”

“I am,” Adam replied firmly. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy the company of an attractive woman.”

“Just don’t break her heart,” Nick warned. “I would imagine she’s pretty vulnerable and you wouldn’t want her to get the wrong idea.”

“Don’t worry. I’m sure we’re both on the same page, just looking for a little companionship, that’s all.”

The day turned into evening and Adam stayed and ate dinner with his brother and his family. By the time he left the ranch, the purple dusk was beginning to fade into night.

Whenever he spent time with Nick and Courtney, he wondered what it would be like to be in love, to share those special glances with a woman, to know each other so well that you could read each other’s minds, finish each other’s sentences.

He didn’t trust himself to have that kind of relationship and yet there were moments of silence in his life that he wished were filled by another’s voice, when he longed to have somebody who cared for him, somebody he could love more than anyone else on the face of the earth.

But he’d loved his parents and they had died. He’d loved his sister, Cherry, and she was gone, as well. He’d looked up to Sam and he had betrayed him. Was it any wonder that Adam was a bit gun-shy when it came to putting his heart on the line?

By the time he parked his truck in Melanie’s driveway, it was almost nine. Her usual habit was to retire to her room around eight-thirty or so.

He opened the door and came in quietly. As he entered the living room, his gaze automatically went in the direction of Melanie’s bedroom.

He froze. Her bedroom door was halfway open, allowing him a view of the bottom half of her bed. He could also see the bottom of her midnight blue nightgown and her slender bare legs beneath. She was sitting up and appeared to be rubbing the calf of her right leg.

He hadn’t ever considered that she might have actual pain. He’d just assumed that her leg was numb...dead. But as he stepped closer, he could hear her emitting soft, whispery moans as her hands worked up and down her leg.

Without realizing what he was doing, he moved to her doorway. She looked up, her eyes widening, obviously startled by his presence.

He didn’t speak; he wasn’t sure if he could if he wanted to. Instead he walked over to the foot of the bed and sat down, then pulled her leg into his lap, surprised when she didn’t fight him.

He began to massage it like she had done, up and down her calf with just a light pressure. Her feet were bare, her toenails painted a pearly pink. Her right foot pointed downward in an unnatural resting position. A perfect ballerina point for a ballerina who couldn’t dance, he thought.