covencraft 04 - dry spells (19 page)

The silence between her and Seth while walking should have been broken up by the sound of the wind or the crunch of their feet on ground or perhaps the natural wildlife roaming the area. But all that Jade heard was the quiet
swish-swish-swish
of their feet. The ground wasn’t soft or fine enough to be sand, but wasn’t hard enough to qualify as rock.

There was a yellowish-green almost vegetation-like thing off to the right that intrigued her - it had little red dots on it too. Maybe berries, she thought. She squinted at it, slowing her step. But then it moved; like the strange blue rock it had been immobile and then suddenly not. She flinched, her feet speeding up to catch Seth. The red ‘berries’ had all turned to face her, like too many eyes on an insect - cunning and watchful. Her heart thudded madly.

“Is it all like this?” she asked, breaking the silence she and Seth had fallen into.

“What do you mean?” he replied, bored, as though she were a child in need of minding.

She stretched her hand out. “Just… So wide and nothing and weird.”

“Yes. And no.”

Jade could feel herself make a face at his answer, though she said nothing in return. He must have sensed it or seen out of the corner of his eye.

“The Dearth is more the absence of things than anything else,” Seth continued. She stole a sideways glance while, keeping pace with him. “No real food, no real drink, hardly any sensations. It can drive you mad. How can you count the passing of time with nothing significant happening? And yet, there are things here that defy logic and reason. Extraordinary things. Horrid things. Beautifully dreadful. So bizarre and unnatural they possess an allure all their own.”

“And demons live here?”

“Demons exist here,” Seth clarified, tilting his head a bit toward her. “I wouldn’t exactly call it living.”

“Do you like it?” she asked, although she got the feeling she knew what the answer was going to be.

“Why do you think we spend so much time pursuing deals, trying to get to the other side? To the mortal side?” Seth asked. She figured it was rhetorical and stayed silent. He sighed and the sound caused her heart to jump. It was possibly the first honest sound she’d ever heard from him. Wistful and maybe melancholy, but it wasn’t overly dramatic or cartoonish, like he could sometimes be. “There’s a lot to miss from the mortal side when we’re here.”

“And you can’t just cross over when you want?”

“I told you once demons have a lot of persnickety rules. You think your government is bad, try ours. Forms, paperwork, torture for non-compliance, fees, disfigurement…” He waved a hand in an ‘et cetera’ gesture, as though indifferent about it all. “With nothing at all to break it up.”

“I thought you couldn’t feel.”

“Pardon?”

“How do you torture someone if they can’t feel? You said no sensations.”

“I said ‘hardly any’ sensations. Pain is always a good motivator, if required.”

Jade looked around the landscape again, eyes squinting. She was finally getting some perspective. They were definitely closer to the road now. She squinted a bit more, thinking she saw some structures in the distance.

“Is that where we’re going?” she asked, pointing. “Civilization?” She wondered if you could use such a word regarding demons.

“Of a kind.”

“Isn’t that good? Won’t that mean… I don’t know, demon phones and maybe transportation? Speed things along?”

“Look, Possum, we may be here a while and, as much as I’m sure you don’t believe it, you’ve grown on me. Like a fungus.”

“Thanks,” Jade said dryly. “You’ve been pretty clear from the start you’re only interested in my power, Seth.”

“Well, of course I am. You reek of power. And it’s a very interesting variety. But other than that, you’ve got grit and you’ve been tenacious. You’re also not a shrieker, which I thought was going to be a problem at first, but has turned out to be rather refreshing.”

“Ugh, get to the point.”

“The point is, there’s a lot to know about the Dearth and even if we had the time, you don’t have the brain capacity to learn it all.”

She shifted her shoulders, insulted. “I thought this was going to be about how I was growing on you.”

“And you are. You have,” Seth cooed, his voice softer, a caramel tone. “Which is why I will try to impart some of my vast knowledge upon you with the hopes that you won’t get us thrown in jail, enslaved to a minor deity, or strapped to a rack for a millennia or so.”

I’m so fucked
, Jade thought. Was he trying to scare her or was he telling the truth? It was so hard to tell. “Is this you trying to be helpful again?” she asked. Seth trying to be helpful was usually full of double talk or sentences that didn’t make sense.

“Yes. If we run into any… thing, it would be best if you could tone it down.”

“Tone what down? I can keep my mouth shut, if that’s what you mean.”

“Tone all of it down,” he replied, waving a hand over her. “You still bleed out power. It’s not as spasmodic as it used to be, but now and again it pulses out of you.”

“Is it bad to be powerful here?”

“Bad for you, yes. You’re of the other world, the living world, and to those of us who live in the Dearth… well, you’re an alluring glass of water.”

“But I’m not doing anything,” she protested.

“Not on purpose. But it’s coming off you in waves.”

Jade frowned. “I can’t… I’m really not doing anything. I didn’t know. No one’s ever mentioned it. Paris has never mentioned it.”

Seth raised a shoulder. “He probably likes it. But over here, you’re a beacon. A nice, shiny plaything.”

“How do I stop it?”

“Focus on your power. Focus on keeping it contained. You’ll find it exhausting, but it will help keep you alive.”

Jade paused, her feet still, and dropped her face in her hands, trying to focus. She thought about her power, about her magic and concentrated. And… there, she could feel it now. Like a slow leak in a dam, - a pulsation of magic emanated from her. She thought of plugging it; the feeling like she was stuffing her emotions into a tiny hole, hoping to stave the leak.

“There you go. Now, just keep doing that. Also, your necklace.”

Her hand immediately went to the salamander charm around her neck, her memory flashing back to when Paris had given it to her. It was a talisman, whatever that meant. She still wasn’t sure. Sakkara had mentioned it as well. Jade remembered during her dreams, when Sakkara was stalking her, she’d mentioned the necklace and implied her influence on Jade had been limited by it.

“Keep it hidden. Better yet, take it off,” Seth said, sneering slightly.

“Why?”

“It oozes… affection and fondness.” He pursed his lips and rolled his eyes. “It’s quite powerful as well,” he grudgingly added. “If you can keep it hidden and keep your own power from leaking out, we should be all right.”

She pinched the salamander between her fingers. She didn’t want to take it off; she liked it. Paris gave it to her and it meant she was part of the Coven.

“Fine, leave it on. See if I care.” Seth muttered something else Jade didn’t catch. “But keep your power contained.”

She wrinkled her nose. It was kind of like keeping your core engaged in that damn booty yoga class. As long as she thought about it, she could do it. But it had the ephemeral sensation of something that could easily be forgotten about or slip through her consciousness.

“And try not to look so mortal. You look like a wreck.” Seth had paused to stop with her for a moment, but started on again, heading for the shanty-town in the distance.

“Ugh, okay, that I probably can’t help.” Jade trotted a bit to catch up to him. “Between you and Sakkara, this outfit has seen better days.” She gestured to the torn sleeve of her coat and shirt. Seth stopped again, looked her up and down and then quickly snapped out his hand, claws springing from his fingertips. Before she could even jump back, he’d slashed the other side of her coat and ripped off both sleeves.

“There. Now you look like some hipster in a puffy vest.” He turned from her and kept walking.

Jade stared at the back of him as he moved, shaking slightly with adrenaline. He’d moved so quickly, his claws so fast. She’d just stood there, not defending herself at all. A big, fat pulse of magic escaped her.

“Possum, your magic. Get it under control.”

She took a deep breath, feeling it wobble and shimmy in her throat as it worked its way down into her lungs. Tears pricked at her eyes, finally granting them some moisture.

#

Back in his car after dealing with Sakkara, Paris wasn’t sure where to go. He stared at the front door of his childhood home, thinking of her behind the oak, wondering if he’d ever be able to cross the threshold again without thinking of the look on her face when he said he wished she’d stayed dead. Would he ever walk through the doorway again without thinking of the honest feeling behind his words? They were said in the heat of moment, but they rang true even after he had time to think on them.

“So,” Lily began from the passenger seat next to him. “Looking for a place to crash?”

“It appears so,” he murmured, his eyes still fixed on the door of the house he grew up in.

“You know you’re welcome to stay with us, right? Me and Bruce, I mean.”

He felt a profound relief at her words. He supposed some part of him hoped he’d be able to stay at Jade’s cottage, but he’d not known how to ask.

“Thank you.”

Lily snorted. “Don’t thank me yet. You’ll have to deal with Bruce full time.”

“I’m sure I’ll manage” His voice sounded hollow to his own ears.

“You wanna go back in and get some things?” Lily asked.

“No.”

“What you need, we buy! May the Visa gods smile on us and wish us fortune.” Lily raised a fist to the air. She sounded so much like Jade. He worked hard to keep them separate in his mind, but every now and then, Lily would do or say something that until then, he’d only attributed to Jade, and he was caught between finding it amusing and asking her if it were possible for her to not be so much like Jade.

The drive was quiet, neither of them commenting on their confrontation with Sakkara. He felt hyper-attuned to Lily - listening to her every inhale and exhale, wondering if it meant something about Jade’s circumstance.

“Can you still sense her?” he asked, unsure how he should reference their connection.

“Yes. I mean, I think so?” Lily said, wrinkling her nose slightly. “It’s almost like seeing something out of the corner of your eye. If I start thinking too much about it, I lose it. Or I’m afraid I’m pushing her mind.” She closed her eyes. “But, if I just sit and listen to the car, feel the movement of us on the road, it’s like I can see what she sees. Impressions and shapes.”

“What do you see?”

“The desert,” she answered quickly. “Sand. Bright light. Strange colors. And… Seth, I think.”

“You think?”

“I don’t know,” Lily admitted. “I think it’s him, but he has a tail and these ears.” She opened her eyes and held her hands up to her head, making little ears with her fingers. “It’s like I’m there and I’m not. A dream remembered. It’s almost clear one moment, then gone the next.”

“Is she… is she still afraid?” Paris asked, afraid of the answer.

Lily cocked her head to the side. “Yes?” she said, as though it were a question he could answer. “I think more time has passed for her than us. I get this sense that wherever she is, she’s been there for some time. She’s not actively afraid.”

He exhaled - his lungs feeling the release of pressure he hadn’t known he was holding. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For Sakkara.”

Lily snorted. “Dude, that level of crazy is
all
on her. You should meet our parents. I mean, my parents. Or rather, my parents after Jade arrived.”

“I gather you and Jade had an unstructured upbringing.”

“Yeah,” Lily said, raising a hand and pushing her fingers against the glass of the passenger window. “We also got the shit kicked out of us.”

Jade also had a way of speaking of her abusive childhood very frankly. Paris was always surprised. Not that he thought they should keep it a secret, but he didn’t imagine them to be so free about it.

“But that only happened once Jade showed up. It wasn’t like that before. And I think Jade… forgets or doesn’t know that.”

Grateful for something other to think about than Sakkara, Paris latched onto Lily’s words. “Your parents weren’t abusive before?”

“No. I remember parties and cake and trips to some kind of carnival where you could go bowling on those small lanes. There was a shiny purple bike with a banana seat and everyone was happy. Once, I think I might have made applesauce with my mom. I remember…” She closed her eyes. “There were apples in a pan. And a long set of stone steps. We were in a basement suite, I think. We put the applesauce on those steps to cool because it was too hot to eat. It all changed when Jade arrived.”

Paris was unable to come up with a reason why that would be. “Was there a change in your environment?” he asked, wondering if perhaps her father lost her job or there was something in the adult world happening that Lily and Jade would not have understood.

“No. I don’t think so. But I was only six. And Jade was about four, I think.”

Paris thought about what he knew of Jade’s death, when she’d been known as Josephine, at the Coven. “She had just turned four. At her death.”

“Yeah,” Lily said again. “I mean, I guess something could have happened, but I don’t think so. I think… It’s not that Jade was responsible. But something happened after she arrived. Something shifted. Changed. My parents weren’t the same. Mom became distant and disengaged. Dad became…” Lily’s hands curled into fists, a gesture Paris recognized as well from Jade. “Angry. Violent.” She sighed. “All that to say, you don’t need to apologize for shit other people do.”

“I still feel somehow responsible.”

Lily nodded. “I know.” He got the distinct impression she wasn’t speaking of him, but rather herself. “Sometimes, even when you know you’re not responsible for something, the weight of it lingers. But you’re not your mother. And you’re not responsible for what she’s done,  either from when you were a child or now.”