Courting Emily (A Wells Landing Book 2) (24 page)

She pulled away from him, gasping as her
kapp
remained in his hands. Her own flew to her head as if to protect it. “That’s not why I’m here.” She snatched the white linen out of his hands, crumpling it between her own trembling fingers. Her ill treatment of the near-sacred item was proof of her distress. “You are supposed to stay here.”

“And get married under the watchful eyes of the church?” he scoffed. “I want more for us than that.”

Emily shook her head, backing away from him as she spoke. The look on her face was a cross between shaken and disturbed. “There is no us.”

“So you’ve been leading me on?” He rubbed his eyes.

“You came to my house.”

“You let me in,” he countered.

To his dismay, tears rose in her eyes. “This was a mistake. I was wrong to come here.” She stumbled toward the door.

“Emily,” he called after her, but she waved away his plea.

“I’ll pray for you, Luke Lambright.”

Before he could say another word, she slammed out the door, out of his house, and out of his life once again.

 

 

Emily ignored the tears that streamed down her face as she swung herself up into her buggy. She had been such a fool. A stupid, stupid fool!

She wrapped her casted arm around her a little tighter as the winter wind blew. The sharp breeze cut right through her woolen coat. The smell of rain hung in the air.

She had thought Luke had changed, unwisely believing he was finally growing up and ready to live the life expected of him. How wrong could one person be?

She had jeopardized everything she held dear for him. Her relationship with her father would never be the same. And Elam . . . he would never trust her again. Stupid, stupid puppy love. If only she had listened with a woman’s heart. Then she might have seen that Elam’s feelings for her were real, and Luke’s were superficial.

Or maybe Luke really did love her in his own way. The thought made her feel only a little better. At least it stopped her tears.

She pulled the buggy onto the road heading the opposite way. She couldn’t go home. Not yet. She had too many thoughts to work out. Maybe she should head over to Caroline’s. At least then all of her words wouldn’t be a lie.

As the horse clopped along, the rain started to fall. Its patter on the roof steadied her nerves and joined the rhythm of the buggy.

Jah,
she would go to see Caroline. Her
freind
would know what to do.

A thump jarred her from her thoughts. The carriage lurched sideways. Emily pulled back on the reins, slowing the horse to a stop at the side of the road. Just in time, too. A loud pop sounded, followed by a crack. The front right side collapsed.

Emily’s head bumped the side of the buggy. Tears stung her eyes. What now?

She slid open the door and stepped into the cold January rain. Her teeth began to chatter almost immediately.

Her horse, Clover, tossed her mane and snorted as Emily walked around in front of her to check for damage.

The wooden wheel had broken in two, split by wear and tear. Or maybe God was trying to tell her something. She shouldn’t be out on a day like this. She shouldn’t have lied to her
mamm
and
dat
. She shouldn’t have asked her sister to lie for her, and she shouldn’t be pinning her hopes on a wayward soul like Luke Lambright. Regardless that her intentions had started off for the good.

She bit her lip to hold fresh tears at bay. Crying would do no good now. Still she wanted to. She wanted to sit on the side of the road with the rain pounding down and bawl like a baby.

Instead she unhitched Clover and led her down the road. Her teeth chattered, her heart ached.

The sound of a car engine could be heard over the rain. She moved farther onto the side of the road. A car whizzed past, the blare of the horn scaring her nearly out of her frozen skin.

She had to find shelter soon or she might freeze to death. A small building loomed in the distance, a phone shanty. Perhaps she could call someone, but she didn’t know any phone numbers by memory. But a phone shanty meant a house was close. There was a driveway up ahead, maybe fifty or more feet in front of her. Once she got there, she would stop and ask for help, whether they were
Englisch
or Amish.

She shivered as she walked, keeping her head down and hurrying her footsteps for both warmth and speed. She needed to get out of the cold damp before she caught pneumonia. She needed to get Clover to shelter, too. It was no fit day for girl or beast.

Emily turned down the drive. She was halfway to the house before she faltered.

Elam’s.

Of all the farms in all of Wells Landing she had to be at the Riehls’.

She squinted and stared up at the sky as the rain continued to fall. “I don’t know if this is Your will or some kind of joke.” But she got no answer.

Her father would tell her that God didn’t joke about things, but coming to Elam’s house as a matter of God’s will was more than she could fathom at the moment. She ducked her head and continued on.

She led Clover into the barn, shutting her in a stall with the promise to return with a blanket and a brush. Clover snorted her consent, happy to be out of the freezing rain.

Emily was soaked to the bone by the time she made her way up the familiar porch steps. Wet, shivering, and beyond cold, she raised her hand and knocked on the door.

Noises sounded from the other side of the door. Feet shuffled, voices murmured, then the door opened and there he stood.

“Elam.” Tears rose in her eyes, grateful and sad tears. Then she threw her arms around him as if she never wanted to let him go.

She smelled warm and sweet and even better than he remembered.

Elam inhaled the scent of Emily plus rain and wrapped his arms around her.

“What are you doing out on a day like this?”

She pulled away from him, and it took all that he had not to pull her back. Too much had happened, too much stood between them. It would never be the same again.

Tears mixed with rain streamed down her cheeks.

“
Gut himmel,
Elam. Let her get dried off, then ask your questions.”
Mamm
came downstairs, a stack of towels in her arms.

“I’m c-c-cold,” Emily chattered.

What was wrong with him? He led her to the fire, stoking it until it roared with warmth.

“Get out of that wet coat, Emily,”
Mamm
said. “It’s just holding in the chill.”

She rolled her shoulders, alerting Elam to the fact that he still had one arm around her. He cleared his throat and stepped back, dropping his hold as modestly as possible.

“My horse is in the barn.” Her teeth chattered as she spoke.

“You rode your horse here in the rain?” What was the matter with her?

“Of course she didn’t.”
Mamm
stepped in, helping Emily shrug out of the sodden wool. “You are soaked to the bone.” She turned back to him. “Elam, go up to Becky’s room and find a dress for Emily to wear.”

He stared at her.

“Go on,” she urged. “Then you can check on her horse.”

His father bounded into the room before Elam could take the first step to completing the chore.

“Emily.”
Dat
smiled his toothy grin. But his expression fell as his gaze took in all of her. “What happened? Why are you all wet?”

“The wheel on my buggy broke a ways down the road.” At least her teeth weren’t chattering quite as violently now.

Dat
turned to Elam. “Go get her something dry to put on before she catches pneumonia.”

Elam’s feet weighed heavy as he headed up to his sister’s room.

“Something purple,” his
dat
called behind him.

Elam shook his head at the wonder of it all. He could hear their voices as they floated up from the living room. He couldn’t make out exactly what they were saying, but he was certain Emily was telling his
mamm
and
dat
how she came to be there.

He wanted to believe it was God. That the good Lord had a hand in putting her on their road today, but he couldn’t get his hopes up. His house was between the bishop’s
haus
and Caroline and Andrew’s place. Emily hadn’t started out to come see him. Or had she?

He grabbed the first dress hanging on the pegs inside Becky’s room and headed back downstairs.

But only Emily remained. She was bundled up in a quilt, huddled close to the fire. Her hair had been wrapped in a towel and for the time being her teeth had stopped chattering.

“Where’s
Mamm?
” he asked.

“Making coffee.”

“
Dat?
”

“Taking care of Clover.”

“Are you warm enough?”

She nodded and pulled the quilt a little tighter around herself.

He wanted to ask the dozen or so questions spinning around inside his head. Instead, he held the dress toward her hooked on the end of one finger. “Here’s a
frack
.”

She took it, and he nodded toward the back hallway. “There’s a bathroom down the hall.”

“I know.” She moved past him, the quilt wrapped around her like an overlarge cape.

She returned a few minutes later wearing Becky’s dress with the quilt still pulled across her shoulders.

Until that moment he hadn’t realized she’d not been wearing any clothes under the quilt when he came back downstairs.

The heat started at his collar and worked its way up until his entire face felt hotter than the top of his buggy in late August.

“Here we go.”

He whirled around as his
mamm
came into the room.

She placed the tray on the table and handed one of the steaming mugs to Emily.
Mamm
took one for herself and passed the other to Elam.

“You’re a very lucky
maedel,
”
Mamm
said. “Buggy accidents can be very serious.”

“I know.” Emily ducked her head over her cup.

Her lips trembled and her chin shook.

Mamm
came closer, smoothing a hand over the side of Emily’s face. “Whatever it is,” she said, “God has a plan.”

Emily nodded, and to his dismay two tears streaked down her cheeks.

“I think I’ll go see about
middawk
.”
Mamm
started for the kitchen. “Or bake a pie. Or something.”

Elam waited until she disappeared before joining Emily on the couch. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

He let out a quick chuckle. “You arrive at my house soaking wet and crying, and there’s not a story behind it?”

“Talking about it won’t change a thing,” she mumbled, then took a big gulp of coffee.

“You’re all right, though . . . right?” He dropped his voice so low it was barely louder than the crackle of the fire. Until that moment it hadn’t occurred to him that someone might have hurt her intentionally, physically. “No one . . . ?”

“Oh,
nay
.” She raised those midnight eyes to meet his, then quickly looked away. “It’s . . . complicated.”

Why had he expected her to say
heartbreaking
instead?

He took one of her hands into his own, loving the slim curve of her fingers. Such pretty hands.

She had given them so much. And yet she had taken from them, too. She definitely had stolen Elam’s heart before she’d broken it in two. That was what he needed to remember in times like these when she looked so irresistible in the firelight. When it would be so easy to lean in and steal a kiss or two. Or five.

His
mamm
had said it all.

God had a plan for them. But one thing was certain: His plan for Elam and His plan for Emily were two entirely different things.

He dropped her hand and stood, needing as much distance between them as possible.

“No one cries like this just because their buggy broke down.” He was pressuring her,
jah,
but something in him wouldn’t let it go.

She swiped at her tears. “Where is everyone?”

“Becky took Johanna to town to look for material for a new dress. The twins and Norma are at school.”

“I went to see Luke today.”

His heart dropped at the sound of the other man’s name.

“My
vatter
asked him to leave Wells Landing yesterday.”

“Why?” Elam asked, though he had a pretty good idea as to why the bishop wanted Luke Lambright out of the picture.

“
Dat
doesn’t feel he’s setting a
gut
enough example for the youth of the district.”

Elam couldn’t argue with that. “You asked him to stay.”

“And join the church,
jah
.”

So they could get married.

He released his pent-up breath not realizing until that moment he had been holding it. If Emily was crying, then . . .

“What did Luke say?”

She sniffed. “He doesn’t want to stay here. He doesn’t want to join the church.”

“He’s leaving again?” His words were thick, as his own emotions clogged his throat. He turned to the window, looking out at the falling rain.

How he wished they could go back in time. Maybe he could do things differently to get Emily to change her mind about him. See him in a new light and forget all about Luke Lambright. But it was too late for that.

“I’ve just made so many mistakes. I thought it would all work out. But it didn’t. It just didn’t.”

Elam nodded. He understood perfectly.

Outside his father closed the barn door and dashed back to the house, jumping over mud puddles much in the same way Johanna and Norma did.

Dat
opened the front door, shaking off the rain and hanging his hat on the peg just inside. “Clover’s all taken care of.”

“
Danki,
” Emily said.

“You want some more coffee?” Elam asked.

“That would be
gut
.”

“Can I have a cup, too?” James asked. He crossed the room to the rolltop desk, opening it and pulling out a deck of cards. “Will you play with me?” he asked Emily. “I’ve missed playing with you.” He made a face at Elam. “Nobody here likes to play as much as I do.”

“I’d like that.” Emily’s smile trembled on her lips, though she managed to keep any new tears at bay.

Elam was grateful for that. He didn’t think he could take many more of those before he pulled her into his arms and never let her go.

His
dat
plopped down into the chair opposite Emily and started shuffling the cards. “Will you teach me how to play poker?” His eyes twinkled.

Emily had the presence to look shocked. “I’m sure I don’t know how to play such a wicked game as that.”

Dat
smiled, as Elam turned to fetch their coffee. “Rummy, it is.”

 

 

James barely waited until his son was out of the room before he spoke. “He’s not been the same since you two broke up.”

Emily tried to smile. Neither of them had been.

“He’s been cranky and moping around the house. You have to do something, Emily.” He started to deal the cards for their game.

“There’s nothing I can do, James. He broke up with me.”

He shook his head and set up the “draw” and “discard” piles on the coffee table. “Why would he do something so stupid?”

“I guess you could say I started it.”

“I don’t understand.” He frowned and picked up his cards.

“I did something pretty stupid first.”

“Everybody does stupid stuff from time to time. That’s no reason to break up.”

“I guess he feels differently.” She swallowed back her tears. So many mistakes. So many stupid mistakes on top of bad choices. “It’s not always that easy, James.”

James pouted. “It should be.” He stopped when Elam came back into the room carrying their coffees.

“I’m going to the barn to check on Sally Ann,” he said. “I’ll take you home when the rain stops.”

“Okay.” She watched as he made his way to the front door and prepared to go outside.

“Sally Ann is our mule,” James explained. “Something got a’hold of her leg the other day. Elam’s been doctoring it.”

“Huh?” Emily said.

James shot her a knowing look. Despite the innocence in his expression, Emily could see the intelligence underlying lighting his eyes. “You miss him as much as he misses you.”

“It’s not that simple, James,” she said again. “I wish it was. I hurt him.”

“You both are making it way too complicated.” James shook his head. “He loves you, you know.”

“Love isn’t always enough,” Emily replied, ignoring the quick beat of her heart at the thought of Elam loving her. He had said he did, but she had stomped on his feelings too many times to gain back his love now.

“What if it is?” James asked. “What if all you need to do is talk to him? Hmm? What then? How will you know until you ask?” He spread his cards on the board. “Rummy,” he called.

One thing was certain, whether Elam loved her or not. If she was going to have a prayer of winning even one game against his
dat,
she was going to have to pay better attention.

But how could she when thoughts of a second chance with Elam swam around inside her mind? Was love enough? Could their feelings for each other bridge the chasm that had yawned between them? Or was it simply too late?

 

 

By midafternoon the rain had stopped. The girls weren’t home yet. After countless games of Rummy, Go Fish, and War, Emily had decided that James might just have a point. How could she not give them both a chance? She had tried to tell Elam that she loved him the night he broke up with her, but the words got lost somewhere between her conservative upbringing and her pride.

But she would forever be kicking herself if she didn’t put her heart out there and tell Elam how she felt.

He was silent as he drove down the lane from his house. Clover followed behind the buggy and slowed their journey. Emily would have plenty of time to talk to him, if only she could find her courage.

Sucking in a deep breath, she laid her hand on his arm.

He flinched as if she burned him.

“Elam?” she asked.

“Hmmm?” He didn’t take his eyes from the road, as if leading the horse required all of his attention.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Sure,
jah
.” But once again he refused to look at her.

“
Nay,
I mean talk. Really talk.”

He tensed, then rolled his big shoulders, bumping against her as they ambled along. “Do I need to pull over for this?”

She shook her head. “When we get to the house we could maybe sit in the barn for a while.” The ground was too wet and the air too damp and cold to stay out in it longer than absolutely necessary.

“The barn,” he repeated. “
Jah,
okay.”

Emily sighed and tried to smile, but she was more nervous now than she’d ever been. It was nerve-racking enough to sit beside him and think about talking with him later and another matter altogether to sit next to him
knowing
they would be talking in the very near future.

Thankfully she had stressed over the asking long enough that they were almost at her house when he agreed. She only had fifteen or so minutes to sit next to him and twist her hands together before they pulled into the driveway.