Consequences (6 page)

8

Trinette

For the past two weeks I have been trying to think of a way to end my relationship with Jrue. Yet every time he touched me, and I felt all eight inches of that chocolate goodness sliding inside of my body, for the life of me I could barely find the strength to even whisper his name. I knew I had to end the affair and focus on my husband and the baby, but part of me wanted to hold out until the last possible second. Mainly because, dammit, it wasn't fair. I had finally found a man who made me feel like the woman I knew I could be. He is the man I had been waiting all my life for, and what happened, I can't even have him. I swear to you someone up above is truly testing me.

“Hey, Trinette.”

I glanced up from my computer to see one of the students enrolled in my program standing right outside my door.

“Come on in,” I urged. Dory shuffled in with her head hung low, wearing boot-cut jeans and an oversized T-shirt. “How are classes going this semester?” There were only four weeks left in the semester.

She shrugged. “I think I'm going to have to withdraw before the grade counts.”

“Why's that?” I signaled for her to take the seat across from me.

Dory's eyes shifted nervously. “My mother and I haven't been getting along. She moved another one of her boyfriends into the house and I don't feel comfortable with him being around my daughter all day when I'm not there.”

I understood better than she'd ever know. My mother had moved her brother into the house when I was twelve. Back then she was so strung out on crack she had no idea he had been raping me in the next room. Uncle Sonny abused me for four years until I finally had the guts to try to bite his dick off. He never touched me again, but the pain of all those years of my mother not being there for me had scarred me bad. Over the last three years Mama and I had worked to restore our relationship and get past that dark period of my life, but it hadn't been easy.

“What I need to be doing is tryna get a job so I can get a place of my own,” Dory continued.

I nodded because I clearly understood where she was coming from. “There's a program out there that may be able to help you get a housing allowance, but you have to be a full-time student.”

Her eyes lit up. “Really? I have no problem with staying in school as long as my baby is safe.”

I smiled at her. She was such a beautiful girl; no one that young should have so much pain to bear. “Let me make a few phone calls this afternoon and see what I can work out. In the meantime, you make sure you study so you can keep your GPA up.”

Dory nodded and looked pleased by my answer; then I hurried her off so she wouldn't be late for class.

I wished someone had cared about me when I was young. Instead, I raised my brothers and grew up fast. I learned to survive by any means necessary.

I heard a light knock at the door and looked up to see Jrue standing there.

“Hey, sexy.” He licked his lips and had my body watering for a lot more than just lunch. “You ready to go?”

I took a moment to take in how good he was looking today in charcoal gray slacks and a black shirt with the top button left loose. The fabric strained across his shoulders and emphasized every muscle on his magnificent body. Every time I looked at Jrue my heart turned over in my chest. I loved that man so much it hurt.

I rose from my desk and was reaching for my purse when I got hit by a wave of nausea. “Oh, God! Excuse me,” I said in a panicked whisper. I then shoved my purse in his hands and raced down the hall and practically knocked Josie, the administrative assistant, over as she was coming out of the bathroom. I made it into the stall in just enough time to puke my guts out. Morning sickness. I'd been feeling it all week. By the time I stepped out of the stall, Zakiya and Josie were standing near at the sink.

“You okay?” Zakiya asked. I could see the suspicion in her eyes. Women were so damn nosy. Eventually everyone would know I was pregnant, but it would be on my terms, not theirs.

I gave a dismissive wave. “I'm fine. I've been feeling nauseated ever since I ate that Chinese food last night.” I moved around them to the sink, rinsed out my mouth, and gargled the tap water. They stood silently watching me.

“You sure? I mean this isn't the first time this week we've heard you puking in the bathroom,” Zakiya said, waiting with a hand at her hip. Josie just sucked her teeth, sighed, and stared at me.

There was no way I was giving these two something to gossip about, especially since I still hadn't told Jrue. “I've got a bug that I can't seem to shake. I'll be fine.” I stood my ground.

I reached for a paper towel, wiped my mouth and hands, and left those two nosy bitches standing in the bathroom. Sorry, but Ms. Netta is not about to be this afternoon's topic of discussion.

Jrue was waiting outside my office with this worried look on his face. “You okay?”

“Yes, I'm fine.” Nodding, I took my purse from his hand and followed him out to his Jaguar. He helped me into the car, then walked around to his side and got in. I started talking nonstop about this ring I had seen at Jared's that I was dying to have. I didn't realize I was the only one holding the conversation until we pulled into Applebee's parking lot and I realized Jrue hadn't bothered to turn the car off.

“What's wrong?” I asked, because I suddenly got a bad feeling.

He took a deep breath, then swung around on the leather seat. “What's really going on with you?”

I had no choice but to play dumb. “W-What do you mean?” I stammered.

“I mean . . . I love you, Trinette. I want to spend my life with you. So why are you lying to me?”

I dropped my gaze. Was I really that transparent? “What makes you think I'm lying to you?”

“Because when you tossed me your purse, it fell onto the floor and I saw the prenatal vitamins.”

Damn. I was busted.
So much for the cocktail ring
.

“Are you pregnant?”

My heart did a nosedive. Goodness, how did I get myself in these messes? And I was really looking forward to us spending the summer together.

“Yes . . . I'm pregnant. I just didn't know how to tell you,” I pouted and batted my eyelashes at him.

“Oh, my God,” he said, and blew out this long breath and started laughing. “I can't believe this shit!”

It was going to be worse than I thought. I averted my gaze, looking everywhere but at his face. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean to deceive you.”

“Deceive me?” He cupped my chin so I had no choice but to look him in the face. “Trinette, you just made me the happiest man. You're carrying my baby.” A proud grin curled his lips.

My mouth hung open. “Y-Your baby?”

He had the cutest smile. “Of course it's mine. You told me Leon was impotent, so unless you've been making love to someone else, that seed growing inside you is mine.”

I quickly shook my head. “Nope, you're the only one.”

He started shouting with joy. I couldn't believe the way he was behaving like he had just landed another huge grant for the department.

“You're not angry?”

His eyebrows shot up. “Angry? Why would I be angry?”

He was dumber than I thought. “Because we're both married and I'm carrying your child?”

He knew I was right, but that wasn't what he wanted to hear. “Listen . . . my wife can't have children. We've been trying for years and it just ain't happening. You are about to give me the one thing I had always wanted, an heir. Someone to pass on the family name. You're giving me the one thing she never could, and that means a lot to me.”

This was turning out better than I thought imaginable. “But Leon thinks this baby is his. I don't know how because he can't ever stay hard enough for anything to happen, but he feels confident that he did enough.” Ooh, I was so good with the lying.

“Then let him keep thinking that. In the meantime, I want you to take care of my baby growing inside of you, because I promise you that child will never want for anything.” He pressed his palm against my stomach and kept on grinning. “As soon as the time is right, I want us to be together.”

I couldn't believe how shit was working out for me. Here I was all set to lose him, and instead we were going to be closer than ever. Men could be some stupid something. But it was their stupidity that made me the smart woman I am today.

Maybe now he would finally leave Charlotte. She is a breast cancer survivor, and Jrue refused to ask her for a divorce until he was absolutely certain her cancer was still in remission. Looks like it was time to hurry that shit up.

“Why don't we have lunch and then we can run over to Jared's and look at that ring you were wanting?” Jrue suggested. “Emeralds, right?”

“Really?” Now I was excited too.

“Absolutely.” He leaned over and kissed my lips. “Anything for the mother of my child.”

I was starting to like the way that sounded.

9

Nikki

“Is there something you need to be telling me?”

Tristan sauntered into my office batting his eyelashes. There was nothing innocent about him. “Something like what?” He was looking everywhere but at me.

I leaned across the desk. “That you've been messing around with Lorenzo?”

One of his eyebrows went up and his mouth kind of hung open. “
Ohmygoodness!
How did you know?”

I rolled my eyes. “How do you think? For the last two weeks I've seen your car parked at the end of my block.”

Tristan did one of those dramatic performances where he cupped his mouth and paced around the room mumbling, “Ohmygoodness!” like Sheneneh from
Martin.

“Nikki, I'm not lying. I had no idea he worked at the shop with Donovan until he asked me to meet him. I knew the address sounded familiar. It wasn't until I pulled onto your street that I finally put it together. Girl, I was floored! You just don't know how badly I've been wanting to say something to you, but Lorenzo swore me to secrecy,” he added, then flopped down in the chair beside me and crossed his legs.

I still couldn't believe Lorenzo was on the down low, considering he was always talking loud in the shop about getting with some female. Now I knew what he had meant by “tapping that ass.” I sat back in my chair with a hard look and folded my arms. “You need to be careful with that one, because his wife, Tammy, is crazy jealous.”

Tristan leaned close. “You know her?”

Yeah, I knew her, and we could have been friends if she wasn't so damn stuck on herself. She was high-yellow, rocking a short natural, wide hips, and a pair of double Cs. She was cute, but truly had low self-esteem the way she called and checked on her man all day long. I told Donovan I didn't know how he dealt with her worrisome ass, popping up at the shop and demanding to know who Lorenzo's clients were.

“Hell yeah, I know her, and the two of you are headed for disaster. She's always in the shop clowning Lorenzo in front of all the customers. I'm surprised she hasn't caught the two of you together.” Tammy was such a bitch, part of me felt Lorenzo deserved better, and if he was happy, then who was I to rain on his parade? “You know how I feel about your involvements with married men.”

I looked at Tristan with a disgusted look. I love him more than I love my own sister, but I've already told him on several occasions how I feel about him messing with someone's husband. Men want to mess with each other? That's their prerogative, just as long as they had enough respect for the woman he had to go home to. “Please tell me you're using a condom.”

Tristan lowered his head, then lifted it and met my hard stare. I wanted to make sure he knew I was serious. “Of course we used condoms. You know I always practice safe sex. Don't worry. Lorenzo knows exactly what to tell his wife and has everything worked out,” he said with a little too much confidence.

“That's fine, but just keep me out of it. I'm serious. I don't want to be in the middle of that shit. Because if Donovan knew . . .”

His eyes widened. “Please don't tell him!”

I gave a dismissive wave. “You don't have to worry about that from me.” Besides, I seriously doubted Lorenzo wanted anyone to know either. “I still can't believe Don's partner is gay.”

Tristan's eyebrow lifted. “I've told you before it's always the man you least suspect that's undercover. Although with all this lusciousness over here, I can understand why it's hard for a man to resist.” He gave me a shit-eating grin. “I'm crazy about him.”

I was half listening because I still had a hard time picturing Lorenzo with Tristan.

“He's leaving her.”

I had to slide a little closer just to make sure I had heard him right. “Who's leaving whom?” I needed clarification.

Tristan grinned. “Lorenzo's leaving Tammy as soon as he pays off a few bills.”

He was looking full of himself today. I didn't have the heart to tell him there was no way Tammy would allow that to happen. She was one of those types of women who had saved her virginity for that one man. And after giving birth to three of his babies and building a life together, there was no way she was letting her husband go. She told me before that her parents had been married for fifty years and she planned to do the same.

“Pump your brakes and slow it down,” I warned, because Tristan had a nasty habit of moving way too fast when it came to relationships and usually ended up getting hurt. “You really need to tread lightly with this one. I'm serious.”

“Oohh-kay, chica. I hear you.” He sucked his teeth, rolled his eyes, and gave me that look like he wished I'd just be happy for him. I sighed. I knew I needed to talk some sense into Tristan's head, but with that big glossy grin and that faraway look in his eyes, like the time he had met Janet Jackson in the elevator, I knew now was not the time.

After another drama-filled radio show, Tristan and I got our things and headed out into the parking lot together. The weather in May was my favorite time of the year.

“You wanna go shopping this weekend?” Tristan suggested while he scrolled through his text messages.

“Oooh! That sounds like fun. We haven't done that in forever.” I stopped walking, then looked up at him, grinning. “Just as long as we go to the Cheesecake Factory.”

“You're on.” He gave me a high five.

“And you have to show me where you bought those shoes.” I pointed down at the pumps on his feet.

“You like? Lorenzo bought them for me last weekend at the flea market. Oooh, Nikki! These Mexicans had a bad pair of leather boots that I gotta have.”

I was still trying to digest Lorenzo going out in public with Tristan to the flea market. Maybe I didn't know that man as well as I thought. Or maybe Tristan was making more of the relationship than it really was. Like I said, I just hated to see him get hurt again. He is a good person with a funny, flaming personality, and if anyone deserved someone special in his life, it is Tristan.

I noticed Tristan kept looking over my shoulder.

“What's wrong? Damn, don't tell me Tammy's out in the lot waiting for you?” I teased.

He rolled his eyes. “Girl, no, but, uh . . . isn't that Donovan's SUV over there?”

My head whipped around; then I felt my heart do a little flip. Sure enough, at the end of the lot was a gray Escalade. I made out enough of his license plate to know it was him. The question was what the hell was he doing here? His headlights were dim, yet I could make out his image in the front seat.

“Uhhh . . . Tristan, I'll see you tomorrow.”

“You sure?” Even after I nodded, he looked skeptical at leaving me. “Aw'ight, but you be careful.”

My cheeks were hot and I was so embarrassed. I forced a smile, then walked across the lot and over to my husband's vehicle. He was sitting behind the wheel, seat reclined, and the engine running. “What are you doing here?” I asked, keeping my voice neutral.

Donovan tossed me a blank look. “What? I can't come and check on my wife?” he said like I should feel guilty about something. I couldn't believe that he was just sitting in the parking lot like there was nothing wrong with him popping up at my job after midnight.

My eyes strayed to the back seat where Aiden was sound asleep in his car seat. “Why isn't Aiden in bed?”

“Why you tripping?” He looked at me like he couldn't understand what I was angry about. “I told you I came to check on you.”

I was stunned. “Check on me for what?” Lord knows, I wasn't sure how much more of this behavior I could take.

“What were you and Tristan talking about?” he demanded, and looked like he wanted to kill somebody. That person being me. Seriously, what the hell was going on with my husband?

“We were talking about going shopping and out to eat this Saturday while Aiden's with Mama,” I said all nonchalant like there was nothing weird about my husband sitting in a parked car questioning my whereabouts.

His eyes locked with mine. “You sure that faggot isn't covering for you?”

“What?” I heaved a sigh. I hated when he used that word.

“I think you're tryna leave me.” He sounded disgusted.

“What?” I was trying to be patient because my heart hurt for this man, but he was starting to trip. “Nobody's trying to leave you.”

Donovan looked at me through narrowed eyes, letting his suspicions get the better of him, and actually looked insulted. “Tell me the truth, Nikki. You're tryna leave me, aren't you?” Some of his anger disappeared, but not all of it. I wasn't sure where all this insecurity was coming from, but it was getting old.

“No, baby. I'm not trying to leave you.” I shook my head, then leaned inside the window and kissed him on the lips with all the love I could muster, yet the second his tongue slipped inside my mouth, I felt the hair at the back of my neck stand up. I drew back and screamed, “What the fuck! Have you been drinking?” Now it was my turn to get mad. Donovan got ready to deny it, but I cut him off. “Uh-uh. I'll be damned if you're going to jeopardize my son's life with your bullshit!” I had every right to be irritated. Like I said before, I already lost one child. I'd be damned before I lose another.

He punched the steering wheel and had the nerve to act offended. “Damn, Nikki. Get off these nuts! I've only had a couple of beers.”

“And that's a couple too many. Get the fuck outta the vehicle!” I demanded, and didn't even wait for him to get out. I swung open the door and practically yanked his ass off the seat. Donovan looked like he wanted to slap me. I knew he wouldn't, but it didn't change the way he looked.

“Man, you're tripping!”

I had a hand at the hip and my finger all up in his face. “No, you're tripping if you think I'm going to let you drive around drunk with my son in the car!” My voice broke and I had this huge lump in my throat. Our life wasn't supposed to be like this. My daughter had been taken way too early and now my husband . . . My marriage was heading toward disaster, and that little boy in the back seat was right smack in the middle of it all.

I had to take a deep breath and count to five before I went clean the fuck off. “Something has got to change, because I can't keep living like this. The drinking, mood swings, and the accusations. All that has got to stop!” I hollered loud enough for the entire block to hear. There were a couple employees of WJPC coming out of the building. They stopped and were staring at us. “What the hell are y'all looking at?” I screamed. Luckily they had sense enough to keep it moving.

Donovan stared at me dumbfounded for several seconds like he couldn't believe I had flipped out. Trust and believe, I'm from the hood and can get down and dirty with the best of them, but clowning my husband out in public was not one of them. Big Mama raised me better than that.

By the time a car peeled out of the parking lot, I had finally got my breathing slowed down. Donovan sighed and dragged a frustrated hand across his face. I was so mad at him the last thing I wanted to hear was his excuses. “Baby—”

I threw my hands up in the air. “Go ahead and get in on the passenger's side. You can bring me to get my car in the morning.” I was too through with him. While he dragged his feet around to the other side, I got in behind the wheel. As soon as I looked back at my little angel who was sleeping peacefully, I got angry all over again. Thank goodness Aiden was too young to know what was going on. Donovan climbed in and shut the door, then turned on the seat. The fire was gone from his eyes and his gaze held so much pain I wanted to cry.

“Listen, baby, I—”

I held up a hand, cutting him off. “Save it for in the morning after you sleep it off. Right now I'm too pissed off to listen to shit you gotta say.” I put the SUV in Drive and headed home. I wasn't sure how much longer I could go on because I was emotionally exhausted. Yet I had a strong feeling that this was just the beginning.