Confessions Of A Vampire (10 page)

I didn't feel that intensity this time. It just felt like he was hiding, though for the life of me I couldn't figure out why he'd do such a thing. I tried to convince myself that he must be deep into something he didn't want coming back to us, but the longer he was gone the more I began to realize that he might not be coming back.

As word spread through the supernatural community that Malachi and I were alone and unguarded I began to fear for my son's safety. He wasn't accepted in my world or Sev's fully and this made him a target. The choice I had to make was not an easy one and it would cost us all a lot in the long run, but I had to make it.

So I called out to Lucifer and made him an offer I hoped he couldn't refuse. In return for Malachi's safety I pledged allegiance to him and soon my beautiful little boy was living in Hell under Luci's protection.

He was being trained for great evil that was to befall the world and I was granted access to the demonic realm so I could search for my husband. I spent every waking hour there, returning to the mortal realm only when I needed to feed. Even then I waited until I was almost too weak to move before returning. I couldn't just give up on him because I knew that if things were reversed, he wouldn't give up on me.

As the days passed, I slowly began to lose hope and spent more and more time in the human world, returning only to his to check on Malachi. Months had passed since Severus had left and I made one last trip to Hell, spending my time with my son and asking Lucifer for permission for him to return home. He agreed but only if I stayed on for a few weeks to help him with a project.

Malachi returned a grown man and took the world by storm. As he charmed his way into every single woman's bed, I was stuck in Hell.

It was there that it all changed. I'd been carrying out a mission for Lucifer when I crossed paths with a demon that knew who I was. Seizing the opportunity he grabbed me and a fight ensued. A fight that I lost. I'd long since promised my soul to Severus and since he wasn't around to claim it upon my death, it was free game. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd have something to actually thank Lucifer for, but he caught wind of what had happened and cast me out of Hell before another could stake a claim to what rightfully belonged to Severus.

“Mom, are you sure it's wise to be telling a breather this stuff?”

Malachi's question drug me reluctantly out of the memory and I sighed in exasperation.

“It's my story and I'll tell it to whomever I choose, Malachi.”

“Okay, Mom, if you're sure you want to.” His demeanor betrayed his lack of confidence in my sanity at the moment but I chose to ignore that.

“Did your father tell you why he has to leave again so soon?”

He shook his head. “No, Big Evil, he didn't. I really have to get going but I'll stop in later to check on you and the girls.” He kissed my cheek and left just as quickly he'd arrived.
I smiled to myself at the nickname my son had given me when he was just a little boy. Unfortunately, his father had picked up the habit of calling me Big Evil as well, just to irritate me.

Aaron looked away quickly when I caught him staring at the empty spot that had once held my son. “He's just like his father, that one.”

“Mrs. Severus, can I ask you a personal question?” His voice shook with fear that he'd offend me but I simply nodded and advised to him to ask away. “Do you ever worry he's not coming back again?”

“It's always in the back of my mind, my dear, but one
cannot
live in fear of the unknown. I trust that Severus will always find a way to return home if he can.”

“You must really trust him then.” He nodded and made a note on his pad of paper before speaking again.
“You
were telling me about the time you two were apart and with other people. Can you tell me more about how you came back together?”

Closing my eyes I let myself be taken back to that place again.

Chapter
Twelve

We'd been sneaking around for weeks, stealing nights together whenever we could. I knew it was wrong, but I just couldn't stay away from him. We'd meet
in
cheap, seedy hotels or places we wouldn't normally be caught dead in.

Guilt was not something I felt, even after Draven declared his love for me. In my mind I wasn't leading him on because I didn't return the sentiment. I'd made it perfectly clear that I was not looking for a relationship and that when we'd divorced it had been for good. But that didn't stop him from acting possessive which drove me nuts
,
to be honest.

I hated feeling like someone was keeping tabs on me and that's exactly what it felt like with Draven. With the exception of the time I'd spent with Severus in the last year, I'd been on my own for quite some time
and I wasn’t used to having to answer to anyone
.

With each stolen moment, I fell more in love with the demon and it was starting to take
its
toll on me. It was harder and harder to leave our rendezvous locations and I felt his own torment over what was going on. It wasn't that he felt guilty for cheating on the witch. He felt fear. Fear that he was feeling things he'd never felt in his entire time alive. And for Severus that was a big deal.

He'd been created over 2,500 years prior and he'd seen many things in his time. He'd witnessed
firsthand
how love could destroy a soul and I believed with all of my heart that this was the reason that he resisted loving me.

But he was beginning to doubt that he couldn't love. Publicly I was seen with Draven and privately I was in love with Severus. I was essentially living a double life and I loved the secret one more. Things were going along pretty smoothly until out of nowhere, he was gone.

I mean he just vanished. I couldn't tell you why his witch
chose
to call me when she couldn't find him, but she did. And I went in search of him. But he'd left no trail behind. And when the bond closed, I felt more alone than ever.

I pushed Draven away. I refused to see him. Nothing he said made a difference to me anymore. Without Severus in my world, I did not want to exist.

Late one night, I was home alone in the cottage when I heard him. His words broke my heart.
“You can't stop living, babe.”

At first I thought I'd dreamed it or had really gone insane, but it was him. I felt him again. If only for a brief second and that's when I started to lose it. But you know about that time already.

“Do you know why he left?” Aaron asked, dragging me out of the memory.

“Not at the time I didn't. I was heartbroken, but as you've heard, he returned
and we would end up together
. But my life wasn't always so centered around men.”

“Can you tell about times it wasn't? Maybe something about what it was like to be a vampire?”

The grin spread wide across my face as I spoke of hunting and all that being undead entailed.

Chapter
Thirteen

The
Twentieth Century was in full swing
and
being a vampire was the most fun one could have. The
Sixties
were just one big party and everyone was so messed up on marijuana or LSD that they didn't remember being a walking snack for the undead.

It was a time of free love and protesting a war and we moved freely among the younger generation. Star and I could easily pass for a college student so we'd hit the local protest rallies or college parties in search of a meal.

We turned heads everywhere we went. Both of us had flawless ivory skin that looked as if we were porcelain dolls. The only difference between us was she had raven black hair that fell in waves down her back while my pale blonde hair hung straight and perfect. Our blue eyes sparkled and we were masters at applying our make up so that we looked perfect at every turn. We'd inherited our mother's long, toned legs and ample bosom. I was often referred to by the girls we hung out with nightly as the living Barbie doll.

Of course they didn't know that I was neither living nor harmless like they thought, but it was amusing to me so I let it continue without a thought.

We'd been in America since the early 1800s thanks to Star's relationship with a man
that wanted to settle here
and we headed west during the Gold Rush. Like that quaint little TV show
‘
The Beverly Hillbillies
’
said, California was the place to be.

We had me
t a young man named Jim
while hanging out at UCLA one evening and he had quite the beautiful voice and was a very talented filmmaker.
Yes, he is the one you’re thinking of.
Our conversations would last well into the night and I loved being around Jim. He was charismatic and wove the best stories. We'd often just sit around fires out on the beach and listen to him sing.
Then in 1965 he met a young man named Ray
and history started
to
unfold. By 1966 they were playing the Whiskey out on the Strip and we were reaping the benefits of being friends with the boys in the band. And when Light My Fire hit, they skyrocketed to fame.

We followed Jim and the boys to the East Coast, hoping to find new blood and escape the constant questioning of why we didn't age that seemed to follow us out in sunny California. We parted ways in Connecticut right after their infamous performance on The Ed Sullivan Show.

Jim was drawing too much attention and Star and I liked to lay low and blend in rather than stand out. Being a vampire was tough even then. We never stopped moving and we'd gotten too complacent hanging out with Jim.

But the East Coast opened up a whole new world for us. As the partying of the Sixties started to die down, people started to take less time to pay attention to us. We managed to feed on a few hippies who still thought LSD was the greatest invention ever. We
survived
on the men and
women who tripped almost daily with no
side effects from the drug and our “meals” didn't even realize we'd bitten them.

But we couldn't keep on preying on those in the drug culture. Star and I needed a home base and we chose New York City. It was the city that never slept and the night life was always jumping. People could simply disappear in the city and no one would ever be the wiser. It seemed perfect for a couple of vampires looking to settle down for a bit.

Disco was big and Studio 54 was THE place to be seen. Of course Star and I were there every night. We rubbed elbows with some of society's elite. The Rubber Room offered us the best opportunity to satisfy all of our needs, both sexual and blood related. It was nothing more than a place we went to fuck, be seen and eat. Star liked the celebrities and often found herself on the arm of Halsten or Andy Warhol.

I liked to hang out and listen to the music or even just chat up the singers. I spent many a night talking to Michael
Jackson or Madonna. The world
that we lived in
was strange
, but we'd witnessed so much by then that we simply took it as it came.

We'd experienced the birth of electricity and running water in homes. Not to mention television an
d
space travel. But we really had no one to share all of that with but each other. It wasn't like we could tell the humans about what we'd seen. They already thought we were strange, but most just shrugged us off as druggies or celeb whores. We were neither, but it was easier to let them think that than to have them asking too many questions.

Money wasn't a problem for us since I'd inherited all of my maker's estate when he “passed away”. I'd invested wisely and we often stole from some of our victims. I'd gotten a lot of money in my divorce from Draven and Star still had money from her time spent in King Henry VIII's bed. He'd been very generous and my sister had earned every cent she got.