Concealed - A Hiding From Love Novel #2 (7 page)

Alexis

Te querré para siempre.

I will always love you.

I
stand looking at Gabe’s shoulder, my heart pounding in my chest, my ears buzzing, my head full of static. I register Beth stepping nearer to me and Mike asking about the meanings of the various tattoos on Gabe’s arm and shoulder. Meanwhile, Gabe stares at me, his face blank, eyes burning through me, down to my core.

I swallow as I let my gaze drift back to the scar. It’s about eight inches long and runs almost straight down the middle of his upper arm.

Then, there’s the tattoo.

Written sideways are two words in a beautiful dark blue script. Each runs along the scar, not on top of it but alongside it, as though it were the ruler mark on a paper. The first word is
Alexis
, and the second,
Forever
.

Gabe slowly lets his sleeve slide down as Mike moves to his other side and starts asking questions about those tats. Gabe gives him vague answers while we continue to stare at one another. Finally, he blinks and his face readjusts itself into its normal, confident, carefree mask. But I know, for those brief moments we look at one another, the man I loved is still there, just waiting for me to let him out.

And I can’t.

Sensing I’m beyond action, Beth takes charge. Within a few minutes, she’s told Gabe and Mike we’re heading to Sixth Street, they say they are too, we all agree to look for each other at Margie’s, and then I’m in a car speeding away toward downtown.

I slouch on the seat and close my eyes as I lean back. My heart rate still hasn’t normalized, and there is a spot deep inside my chest that is so tender I feel like I’ve been punched.

“Well?” Beth says quietly.

“Well, what?” I answer, keeping my eyes closed so I won’t have to face her.

“That was interesting.”

“Yeah, you could say that.”

Her hand nudges me in the arm. “You obviously didn’t know about it.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Alexis!”

I open one eye and glare at her.

“Is that seriously all you have to say? I mean, my God, this guy has made a shrine to you on his body. A shrine, Lex. Don’t you feel anything? Don’t you have something to say about it?”

I sigh and wonder what there is to say. How do you talk about someone who once loved you so much he would preserve the skin that was scarred in your defense and then decorate it with your name? He could have placed a tattoo over that scar and rendered it virtually invisible. Instead, he made it the center of what my sister is calling a shrine. A keepsake of the night we first made love, and he placed the word
Forever
right alongside the whole thing.

“He loves you, Alexis. Like, really loves you. What are you going to do?” she asks.

“Nothing,” I reply. Then I finally open my eyes. I look at Beth, anger flaring through me like a well-fed flame. “I have. A. Boyfriend. I haven’t seen Gabe in two years. I left him for a reason, Beth. What the hell do you want me to say here? Should I tell Marco, ‘Sorry, but apparently this other guy loves me too, so see ya around’?”

Beth rolls her eyes.

“Ooh, I know!” I continue. “Maybe I won’t even tell Marc and I’ll just run off to Hawaii with Gabe and we’ll live happily ever after. You know, since he tattooed my name on his skin and all. Guaranteed happiness.” I snort.

“Stop it, Lex,” she hisses. “Stop trying to act like you don’t give a shit when I know you do. You were obviously jealous every time I touched him.” She levels me with a stare. “I know you care about Marco. I like Marco. He’s a good enough guy, and I’m not telling you what you should do, but you can’t ignore this man who is in passionate, almost violent love with you. I’ve never seen anything like the way he looks at you. It’s like you’re the answer to every question he’s ever asked.”

“Get real, Beth! Will you listen to yourself? I can’t believe I’m hearing this. You’ve built this whole thing up into some sort of mythological romance. Next thing I know, you’ll be saying he’s slayed dragons for me.”

Beth looks at me hard. “Hasn’t he?”

I fall silent, unable to respond.

Her voice gentles. “Even if Marco is your future, you need to find closure with Gabe. He obviously needs it, and I think you do too. Figure out a way to let him go, Lex, or none of you are going to be able to move on.”

Gabe

Apretados pero contentos.

The more the merrier.

S
IXTH
Street is pounding. Bass drums and electric guitars pour out of the narrow, old brick buildings and college kids spill onto the adjacent sidewalks and street like a constant stream of buzzing bees. And alcohol is everywhere you look. Outdoor carts with cheap beer and margaritas, frat boys stumbling around with the obligatory red plastic cups, doormen carding and hand-stamping to ensure no one who shouldn’t drink does. Normally I would thrive on this, but tonight it threatens to give me a headache.

Mike quizzes me to no end on the ride over – did Alexis and I hook up in Afghanistan? Why aren’t we together now? Do I want to hook up with her? Can he hook up with her sister then? Do I want to hook up with her sister? The dude is seriously head-fucked over the whole thing. Of course, come to think of it, I am too.

We park at a lot on one end of the downtown strip and start weaving our way through the drunks and screaming girls to get to Margie’s, where we’re meeting Mike’s cousin.

“So, you gonna hook up with one of the Garcia sisters tonight?” Mike asks for what feels like the millionth time.

I glare at him.

“What? Just asking,” he says, arms out to his sides in a
what the fuck
gesture.

“I’m not hooking up with anyone tonight,” I answer curtly. “I’m just here to drive your ass around when you get drunk.”

“Maybe you’d be a little friendlier if you did hook up,” he notes.

“Fuck off,” I growl.

“Yeah, that’s what all the girls say to
you
.”

Up ahead I see the lights of Margie’s – iconic Austin bar and live music central. The line to get in runs out the front door and down the block about twenty yards. Mike, however, appears to know the secret password, because he swaggers right past the line and up to the front door where he lays a half-hug and a handclasp on the doorman.

“This is my buddy from work, Gabe. Gabe, this is Rick. We grew up together.”

I shake hands with the guy, who’s almost as big as Mike. I definitely want these guys on my side if the shit hits the fan.

“Good to meet you, man,” Rick says. “Carla and Denise are already here, so go on in before they get wasted and do something stupid.”

Mike laughs, and we squeeze through the double doors that are stuffed with humanity.

As we shuffle through the throng of people bottlenecked at the entrance, I find myself scanning the crowds for a glimpse of silver or black, the colors Alexis is wearing.

When she walked down the stairs at our apartment building, it felt like an eighty-pound weight had settled on my chest. She was gorgeous in Afghanistan in cargo pants and t-shirts, her hair in all its natural wildness. But I’d never seen her decked out. A war zone doesn’t have many clubs. Watching her in that tight, glittery top and the black mini-skirt was almost more than I could take. All I could think was what those long legs would feel like as I stroked my tongue along them from ankle to someplace higher and even sweeter. My mind rushes to the thought of her in those cowboy boots and not much else. I’d volunteer to give her a ride. Fuck. Even in the middle of a raucous bar slammed between sweaty college kids, the idea of her makes me hard.

When we finally push through the crowd at the door, I realize the building is a lot larger than I thought viewing it from the outside. The room we are in has an open roof and two-story-high limestone walls. A set of stairs runs to our left up to what looks like more tables and a lot more people.

Mike leads me straight through the courtyard space until we enter a more traditional enclosed bar area. It’s three deep along the bar itself, waitresses piling up at the servers’ station to load trays with pitchers of beer and dozens of shots. I think briefly about the bar Nick’s fiancée, Lyndsey, manages back in Hilo. I’m wearing the t-shirt she gave me before I left, and for a moment I miss her and Nick painfully. Shaking off my nostalgia, I follow Mike to a high table with two blondes sitting at it.

“Dude, this is my cousin Carla and her roomie Denise.”

I put my hand up in an approximation of a wave. The place is so noisy that I’m not sure there’s any point in talking. Mike’s cousin has big blue eyes and a perky nose to go with her perky chest. She motions at me to take the stool next to her and I sit down, continuing to scan the place for Alexis or her sister. Hell, at this point I’d even be all right with seeing Marky Mark Where he is, Alexis is sure to follow. The whole idea makes me want to fucking hit someone.

Carla must see that I’m not in the best frame of mind, because before she’s even said anything, she’s placing a big glass of beer in front of me right alongside a shot of what looks to be tequila.

“Here,” she says as she leans in close to my ear. “This’ll help.” She gives me a genuine smile. She might look like a typical party girl, with her tight tank top and short shorts, but maybe there’s more to her than that.

“Thanks,” I return as I take the beer and down half of it in one.

“Hard day at the garage?” she asks.

“Nah, I’m just normally a cranky bastard.”

She laughs. A real laugh, not the phony giggles some girls hand out like candy.

“So you’re really Mike’s cousin?”

“Yep. His mom is my dad’s sister.”

“Well, you definitely got the looks. He’s a fugly asshole.”

She busts up, earning a sharp look from Mike, who seems to have radar when I’m badmouthing him. I give him my most innocent smile and he rolls his eyes and goes back to chatting up Carla’s roomie.

“I think I just figured out why Mike wanted to come out with you so badly,” I say in Carla’s ear.

“Uh, yeah, that would be for my roommate,” she answers.

“Dick didn’t even tell me. I thought it was a guys’ night, and now I find out he was planning on trying to get with your roommate.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it if I were you,” she replies as she toys with the straw in her ice water. “He’s been at it for months. He’s firmly trapped in the friend zone.”

“Ouch. That’s gotta smart. Is she seeing someone or just not into him?”

She rolls her eyes. “She’s single and crazy about him, but neither one of them will make the first move, so they’re stuck. They’re idiots.”

I laugh. “Yeah, love’s a bitch, isn’t it?”

She looks at me for a minute as if she reads something into my remark. Then she nods. “Yes, it is.” She reaches down, squeezes a lime into her mouth, and then picks up a full shot glass and tips it at me. I follow suit and we clink our glasses together before downing the burning liquid. The heat settles in my stomach, and I decide that if I have to sit here and wait for Alexis to show up I might as well enjoy myself a little.

Two hours later, I’m feeling the booze and Carla and I have bonded. She’s a kickass girl, funny, down to earth, and honest as hell. She’s asked about my move to Austin and I’ve learned about her senior year at UT studying Architecture. Finally, I hear some new music start up in the club room next door. I figure I should start working some of the alcohol out of my system if I’m going to be driving us home.

“You want to go do a little dancing?” I ask Carla.

She leans in close. “Only if you promise not to step on my toes.”

“Deal,” I answer, and we head to the dance floor.

We haven’t been dancing long when Mike comes up behind me and taps me on the shoulder. “Hey, man, I wanted you to know your girl’s here.”

I look around, searching the room for her.

“She’s out by the bar. Looks pretty toasted too. Has her sister and a couple of guys with her.”

I nod at him. “Thanks, man.”

He gives me a chin lift and goes back out to the bar. I decide to finish up my dance with Carla. Alexis is with fucking Marco. No reason for me to rush out to see her. I briefly wonder if this will ever get any easier. Will she ever relent and talk to me or spend any time with me? Will I ever get tired of following her around like the whipped fool I am? What happens if I’m the only one in love here? I force a smile for Carla and keep dancing.