Complete Works of James Joyce (320 page)
Read Complete Works of James Joyce Online
Authors: Unknown
(Takes his hat from the table.)
Richard, goodbye.
(Offering his hand.)
To our next meeting!
RICHARD
(Rises, touches his hand.)
Goodbye.
(Bertha appears at the door on the right.)
ROBERT
(Catches sight of her: to Archie.)
Get your cap. Come on with me. I’ll buy you a cake and I’ll tell you a story.
ARCHIE
(To Bertha.)
May I, mamma?
BERTHA
Yes.
ARCHIE
(Takes his cap.)
I am ready.
ROBERT
(To Richard and Bertha.)
Goodbye to pappa and mamma. But not a big goodbye.
ARCHIE
Will you tell me a fairy story, Mr Hand?
ROBERT
A fairy story? Why not? I am your fairy godfather.
(They go out together through the double doors and down the garden. When they have gone Bertha goes to Richard and puts her arm round his waist.)
BERTHA
Dick, dear, do you believe now that I have been true to you? Last night and always?
RICHARD
(Sadly.)
Do not ask me, Bertha.
BERTHA
(Pressing him more closely.)
I have been, dear. Surely you believe me. I gave you myself — all. I gave up all for you. You took me — and you left me.
RICHARD
When did I leave you?
BERTHA
You left me: and I waited for you to come back to me. Dick, dear, come here to me. Sit down. How tired you must be!
625
(She draws him towards the lounge. He sits down, almost reclining, resting on his arm. She sits on the mat before the lounge, holding his hand.)
BERTHA
Yes, dear. I waited for you. Heavens, what I suffered then — when we lived in Rome! Do you remember the terrace of our house?
RICHARD
Yes.
BERTHA
I used to sit there, waiting, with the poor child with his toys, waiting till he got sleepy. I could see all the roofs of the city and the river, the
Tevere.
What is its name?
RICHARD
The Tiber.
BERTHA
(Caressing her cheek with his hand.)
It was lovely, Dick, only I was so sad. I was alone, Dick, forgotten by you and by all. I felt my life was ended.
RICHARD
It had not begun.
BERTHA
And I used to look at the sky, so beautiful, without a cloud and the city you said was so old: and then I used to think of Ireland and about ourselves.
RICHARD
Ourselves?
BERTHA
Yes. Ourselves. Not a day passes that I do not see ourselves, you and me, as we were when we met first. Every day of my life I see that. Was I not true to you all that time?
RICHARD
(Sighs deeply.)
Yes, Bertha. You were my bride in exile.
BERTHA
Wherever you go, I will follow you. If you wish to go away now I will go with you.
RICHARD
I will remain. It is too soon yet to despair.
BERTHA
(Again caressing his hand.)
It is not true that I want to drive everyone from you. I wanted to bring you close together — you and him. Speak to me. Speak out all your heart to me. What you feel and what you suffer.
RICHARD
I am wounded, Bertha.
626
BERTHA
How wounded, dear? Explain to me what you mean. I will try to understand everything you say. In what way are you wounded?
RICHARD
(Releases his hand and, taking her head between his hands, bends it back and gazes long into her eyes.)
I have a deep, deep wound of doubt in my soul.
BERTHA
(Motionless.)
Doubt of me?
RICHARD
Yes.
BERTHA
I am yours.
(In a whisper.)
If I died this moment, I am yours.
RICHARD
(Still gazing at her and speaking as if to an absent person.)
I have wounded my soul for you — a deep wound of doubt which can never be healed. I can never know, never in this world. I do not wish to know or to believe. I do not care. It is not in the darkness of belief that I desire you. But in restless living wounding doubt. To hold you by no bonds, even of love, to be united with you in body and soul in utter nakedness — for this I longed. And now I am tired for a while, Bertha. My wound tires me.
(He stretches himself out wearily along the lounge. Bertha holds his hand, still speaking very softly.)
BERTHA
Forget me, Dick. Forget me and love me again as you did the first time. I want my lover. To meet him, to go to him, to give myself to him. You, Dick. O, my strange wild lover, come back to me again!
(She closes her eyes.)
Are you not weary of ardent ways
I only ask you to give me your fair hands
Scalding tears shall not avail
We will leave the village behind
After the tribulation of dark strife
Told sublimely in the language
Love that I can give you, lady
Though there is no resurrection from the past
And I have sat amid the turbulent crowd
Gorse-flower makes but sorry dining
That I am feeble, that my feet
The grieving soul. But no grief is thine
Let us fling to the winds all moping and madness
Hands that soothe my burning eyes
Requiem eternam dona ei, Domine
Of thy dark life, without a love, without a friend
Some are comely and some are sour
O, it is cold and still - alas!
She is at peace where she is sleeping
I said: I will go down to where
Though we are leaving youth behind
Come out to where youth is met
