Compass Call: Survival & Awakening (The Gatekeeper Book 3) (44 page)

John cleared his throat and said, “It’s a way of clearing yourself, of preparing yourself for awareness and awakening.”

“I’ve already been to the other side. Will the gates help me?” she asked.

“You’ve already been to the other side?” asked Pete.

Marissa nodded and said, “A couple of times, but not because I wanted to. I was attacked and badly beaten.”

“Yes, Marissa. To answer your question . . . the gates will help you. More than you know. I can take you through them, but you should read my journal first. Would you like to do that?” asked John.

“Yes. But what does it mean? I’ve never heard of gates before,” she replied.

“The best way I can describe it is to say it’s a cleansing process, a cleansing of the mind. It’s a mental exercise designed to purge troubled thoughts from your past,” said John. “I’ve taken Pete about half way through, and he wants to finish, which tells me he feels good about it, but little else.

Pete nodded and said, “You’re right, it’s cleansing. I feel lighter, freer even. But I also want to do what John’s doing,” he said as he turned to Marissa. “I want to see things, to do and feel things like John does. I want to be awakened and work on the other side with him,” finished Pete.

Marissa studied Pete for a moment and said, “I think John’s special, Pete. I don’t think even he knows how special he is. I don’t think everyone can do what he can do, but I feel the gates are important and I also want to try them.”

John wanted to say to Pete, “You may not get what you want or expect,” but Marissa saved him the trouble. He didn’t know what Pete could open up by finishing the gates, but he wasn’t about to stifle his interest and enthusiasm. After all, Pete did have a visit from Eli, so who was he to say his friend couldn’t work with him on the other side. John had a hard time believing he was special, but if he was special then why couldn’t Pete be special as well? In fact, John couldn’t help
but wonder if everyone in the company couldn’t be awakened to do some kind of spiritual work.

He understood the need for balance between the two, the physical and spiritual worlds, but he wasn’t sure if he could explain that to Pete and Marissa, at least not yet. Every time he crossed over he learned more about the work. It was as if he was being given very measured and specific doses of information, not too much to overwhelm him, but enough to keep moving forward. He looked at Marissa with a nod and said, “I can help you.” John saw the hunger in their eyes, their desire to know and be more. He knew the feeling. He had it himself, still did even. He smiled warmly at them and added, “But don’t complain to me if you’re so tired you can’t think straight.”

For the first time since his own awakening, John felt the role of Gatekeeper settle firmly on his shoulders like a thick cloth mantel. He fully realized that the key purpose of his work was to bring other people to their awakening, and he wondered how he’d have the time. It was no small thing taking people through the gates, and he wondered if there was a simpler way. “As for the meeting,” he said, wanting to move the conversation back onto more solid ground, “I’ll talk first, and then I’ll let Tony talk. After that, the neighborhood can decided how it wants to handle the situation. But I think we should offer them some hope of survival, and I need your help to do that, Pete. I think we should organize a scavenge crew, and go out and see what we can find for these people to live on.”

“I can do that,” said Pete. “It’s not like we don’t have an inventory of motorcycles at our disposal.”

“Speaking of which, is the food for our trip ready to go?” John asked Marissa.

“Everything’s ready. We finished last night, with a little extra,” she replied with a nod to the far wall. Boxes, cans and pails were stacked against the far wall by the back door.

John turned to look and said, “I’ll take what’s left back to the shop. There are other things I want to move out there as well, like extra stuff from the gun safe, before I seal up the shelter,” said John.

“Do you think someone will take over the house when we leave?” asked Marissa.

“I’m sure of it, what with the pool, the solar panels, and the well. As soon as we leave the house will be a neighborhood prize. Maybe they’ll turn it into a community center or something,” said John.

“And you’re OK with that?” asked Pete.

“There’s no point in being anything but OK with it,” said John. “When we leave we’re not likely coming back. I’ve seen where we’re going and it’s a beautiful place. It will be a long, hard journey, so I don’t think we’ll be in a hurry to rush back.” John rubbed the back of his neck with a hand and added, “Besides, I don’t think there’ll be anything to come back too.”

John knew it was only a matter of time before everyone in the group learned about his spiritual abilities, so it was more an issue of filtering and dissemination; that is if he really wanted to control what was being said about him. He wasn’t a control freak, but he knew how easy misinformation could damage a unit’s cohesion. He made plans to address his abilities at the next adult meeting, but only after he had a chance to talk to Jenna first. He knew they would all come to talk about spirituality openly, like they were currently doing with Paul’s sword fight, but John knew he had to walk them in slowly. Talking about things that others couldn’t see was mostly met with suspicion and superstition.

As other members of the group grew more spiritually active, their conversations would certainly focus on the work, but John knew he had to prepare Jenna. She never liked hearing about his dreams, and he couldn’t help bring her along by ambushing her sentiment through Pete and Marissa’s interests. They were the core team, and it wouldn’t be right for her to respond to group comments without having foreknowledge, especially if John was the center of the discussion. She was
the one who needed to know, and the one he most wanted to share his experiences with before any other. He knew he wouldn’t feel complete until he could talk openly with her about everything he was spiritually learning and doing.

After a few minutes of silent thinking and eating, John rose from his chair at the counter and said, “Well, we’ve got a lot of work to do today if we’re going to leave tonight. Excuse me while I go check on Jenna.” Pete and Marissa acknowledged John’s departure, and went about handling their own immediate tasks. The house and everyone in it had become a fine tuned and well-oiled machine despite the distractions. Everyone knew their routine. Everyone played a part. Teamwork made all the difference.

John made his way into the bedroom and found Jenna separating clothes for their packing list on the bed. “What’cha doing, babe?” he asked playfully, grabbing her from behind and hoping to catch her in a good mood. She leaned her head against his shoulder and resumed folding. John could tell she was distracted, and he knew how to approach her when she was like that, in a professional manner.

“Packing to leave,” she said, as he released her. “What should I do with all the extra clothes? Do you think I should put them in the shelter?” asked Jenna.

“It’s up to you. I’m not bothering with mine, but I do want to put a few things in the shelter before I seal it up . . . like some of our documents and family heirlooms.”

“The photo albums?” asked Jenna, as she folded a t-shirt and laid it on a stack with others already folded and sitting on the bed.

“Yeah, like the photo albums,” said John, as he sat on the edge of the bed to help her fold. “Do you mind if we talk a second?”

She paused and looked at him, and said, “It must be serious. You never ask to talk like this.”

“You’re right. I guess it is serious,” replied John.

“You’ve been busy lately, so I can only guess what’s on your mind,” said Jenna, as she placed another folded shirt on a stack of shirts.

John sighed and said, “Can you take a break for a minute and sit next to me?”

Jenna dropped the unfolded shirt she was holding and said, “I’ve started my period.”

“I wasn’t planning to molest you,” teased John.

“It’s not that. But I was wondering what I’ll do when I run out of tampons,” she replied flatly. She sat next to John and leaned her head on his shoulder.

“Well, I’ve got several packs of pads in the medical supply box. I put them there for bleeding wounds, but they are menstrual pads.” John put an arm around Jenna and said, “I thought you had several boxes of tampons before the disaster started?”

“I did . . . I do, but they won’t last forever. I’ve already given a few to Bonnie, and I’m sure Marissa will need some soon. And let’s not forget Abby. All I’m saying is that we’ll run out very soon. How many pads did you say you had?”

“Three or four packs . . . I think. More than enough for the trip.” After a moment of quiet pondering, John asked, “I wonder what Native American women did before pads and tampons?”

“A Moon hut,” replied Jenna.

“A what?”

“I read that Native American women were respected when they cycled. They gathered in a tent, in some cultures it was called a Moon hut. Anyway, they gathered together and waited for their flow to stop. They were celebrated . . . honored even . . . by their tribe.”

“That will be hard to do while we’re traveling,” said John.

“My point exactly. But your pads will help. I figure we’ll come up with something else when we run out, like rags or something. Sorry to bother you with this, but I thought you should know.”

“I’m glad you shared it with me. I was at a preparedness open house a few years ago and I ran into a lady who had several daughters. She told me, quite proudly even, that she had twenty cases of tampons and pads ready for when the grid went down. She added that her
daughters were all grown and gone, but she still had the twenty cases and planned to barter with them. I thought it was a pretty creative solution to her surplus,” said John, and then he added, “I’m sorry I didn’t more thoroughly consider your needs.”

“It’s OK. But excuse me if I don’t hold my breath hoping we’ll run into a well-stocked tampon prepper lady,” said Jenna, and then pecked John on the cheek. “So, what do you want to talk about?”

John sighed and asked, “Are you still worried about me . . . about my mind?”

“I stopped worrying about your mind when you lost it,” Jenna teased.

“I’m serious, babe. I know you were worried about me, about the dreams I was having.”

“Well, I’m not worried any more. Not since the biker thing yesterday anyway.”

“Really? Why’s that?” asked John, surprised and interested in her change of heart.

“I felt you comfort me. I don’t know how you did it, but I felt it. And I know you touched Pete too. You did, didn’t you? You somehow talked to me when you were away.”

“I did,” answered John.

“I don’t know what’s going on with you and your dreams and visions and stuff, but I can tell it’s real . . . and important,” said Jenna.

John nodded and said, “It sure is,” and he began to highlight some of his most recent spiritual experiences with her. He eventually got up and handed her his journal from the night table. “It’s a lot of reading, I know, but it’s everything I have, and it will sound better if you read it. I just want you to know that there’s more to this spiritual stuff than meets the eye. Something’s going on with me that I don’t fully understand, but it’s real, Jenna, and it’s happening. It’s not a figment of my imagination, it’s not PTSD from the Iraq War, and it’s not me going crazy or losing my mind. It’s real, and I really need to know
you support me. We’ve been through a lot together, and I can’t do this alone,” finished John.

“John, I love you. I never thought you were crazy, but the stuff you said scared me a little. I’m not used to talk of ghosts, or spirits, and stuff like that . . . of you seeing things far away, and in the future. It’s not normal. But I’ve learned that normal isn’t necessarily the truth. I’m coming to terms with you . . . and your abilities. I don’t know what’s happening, but I do support you. I’ll read your journal, but I don’t really have to.”

“Thanks, babe. I love you too. Read it if you have the time. There’s a lot more detail in the journal. I think you’ll find it interesting, and it will explain my motivations more clearly.”

Jenna stood with the Journal in her hands and nodded. She dropped it on the bed and embraced John affectionately. John returned the embrace and literally felt the love flow between them, more strongly than anything he had ever before felt, and it warmed him beyond description. He knew they had reached an important crossroad in their relationship, and that their journey would be one of unity and closeness, regardless of the challenges they faced. Once again he was excited for the future.