Coming Out (8 page)

“They're discriminating against blacks and Jews.”

“I guess you're even then,” she said calmly. “I'm not sure one discrimination is better than the other. It seems about the same to me.”

“You've been talking to my mother,” he said, tossing the salad. “She just wants an excuse to get dressed up. You all do. You're losing sight of what this kind of thing means.”

“It's just a rite of passage, Harry. There's no malice behind it, and the girls will be disappointed if you don't go. That seems worse to me, hurting people you love and who love you, in order to make a statement to people you don't know, and who won't care that you're not there. We will.”

“You'll be fine without me. Max and I will stay here.”

“What are they going to come out of?” Max asked, still confused about what the girls would be doing, and how Charlie would help them, while his mother and grandmother watched. Although he knew his father disapproved.

“The girls are going to walk out on a big stage, under an archway of flowers, and they will make a curtsy, like this.” She demonstrated it for him, sinking gracefully with her head up and back straight, and then coming back up again with her arms extended like a ballerina.

“That's it?” Max looked intrigued, as Harry went to turn the steaks on the barbecue. He had seen her curtsy and pretended he didn't. He didn't want to know.

“That's it. It looks better in a long dress.”

“That looked pretty good.” Max looked impressed. His mother was pretty, and so were his sisters. He was proud of all of them, and Charlie and his dad, too. “Do the girls know how to do that?” He hadn't seen them practice and it looked hard to him. He suspected correctly that it was harder than it looked.

“Not yet, but they will. They'll have a rehearsal that afternoon before the ball.”

“I bet they do it better than everyone else,” Max said with certainty. “What will Charlie do?”

“He'll stand next to Ginny while she does it, and then give her his arm, and they'll walk down the stairs. And afterward, the girls will dance with their dad.”

“Both of them at the same time?” It sounded complicated to Max.

“No, one at a time.” The other twin could have danced with Harry, if he'd been there, and then switched. This way, without him, they would have to take turns.

“Who's going to walk Veronica down the stairs?”

“We don't know yet. Veronica has to figure it out by Thanksgiving.”

“He better be good, so he can catch her if she falls over while she does that thing you just did, or if she falls down the stairs.” Harry and Olympia both laughed and their eyes met, as he put their steaks on plates. And then suddenly Olympia laughed at the memory of her own escort. She hadn't thought of it in years.

“My date got drunk before we got out onstage. He passed out, and they had to find another boy to go onstage with me. I'd never met him before, but he was very nice.”

“I bet they got really mad at the one who got drunk.”

“Yes, they did.” She remembered, too, and didn't mention, that it had been the last time she danced with her father. He had died the following year, and later she had cherished the bittersweet memory of her last dance with him. It had been an important night for her, just as she hoped it would be for the girls. Not a life-changing moment, but one that, in retrospect, had always meant a lot to her. She had never given it any particular social importance or significance. It had just been a night when she felt special and important, and everyone had made a fuss over her. She had never felt that beautiful again until her wedding day. Other events in her life had had deeper meaning, her marriages to Chauncey and later Harry, the births of her children, her graduation from Vassar and later Columbia Law School, the day she learned she had passed the bar. But that one night at The Arches had meant a lot to her, too. Particularly the last dance with her dad.

“It sounds like a bat mitzvah,” Harry said quietly, as he listened to her.

“You're right,” she said gently. “It's all about how important a young girl is on that special day.” She had been to one or two with him over the years, and had been impressed by how special the girl being celebrated felt, as they made speeches about her, showed films of her childhood, and carried her mother around the room in a chair. Bar mitzvahs, for boys, were even more impressive, and also a rite of passage. They were all-important landmarks between adulthood and youth—officially, the end of your childhood, and your entry into an adult world. Watching Veronica and Virginia go through it was something she would have liked to share with him.

Harry still didn't see it that way. He thought it was more important to make a statement about the political incorrectness of the event. Max asked a number of questions about bar mitzvahs then, and Harry talked about his. It was a time he would always remember with tenderness and joy. Max was already excited thinking about his, and it was seven years away.

The girls called as Olympia and Harry were cleaning up after dinner. They liked their classes, and said everything was fine at school. They were sharing a suite with each other and two other girls. Charlie had a single room that year, as a lofty senior at Dartmouth. He had opted to live on campus, in the dorms. He had talked about getting a house with a bunch of roommates, and decided against it in the end. He said he didn't mind living in the dorms again. They hadn't heard from him since the day he left. They knew he was busy, and had a lot to do as he started his senior year. None of the older children was coming home before Thanksgiving. It felt like too long to Olympia before she saw them again. It made her more grateful than ever that they had Max, and another twelve years to look forward to with him.

Harry and Olympia put Max to bed together that night. Harry read him a story, while Olympia kissed him and tucked him in. After they did, they went to their own room, and talked for a long time. They both had heavy workloads and important cases to deal with. They liked talking about their work and the things they did all day. She loved sharing all aspects of her life with him, and hearing what he thought. She valued his opinions and judgment, about all matters, except the deb ball. She thought he was being utterly absurd about that.

When she snuggled up next to him in bed that night, she was grateful for him. She loved the life and children they shared. It was a good life, filled with loving people, work they enjoyed, and children who were a perpetual blessing to them. She fell asleep in his arms as they whispered, and for the first time in months, the ball no longer seemed important, whether or not he attended. If not, it no longer mattered. She loved him anyway.

Chapter 4

All of the children
came home for Thanksgiving. Charlie came home on Tuesday, the girls on Wednesday. They had just gone through the agony of midterms, and all three of the older children felt liberated and free. Max was thrilled to have them too, and loved playing with them. Charlie picked him up at school the day he got home, and took him to Central Park, to the zoo. He bought him hot chestnuts and a balloon. And the following afternoon, he took him skating. They returned with pink cheeks, bright eyes, and in great spirits. By the time they got home, the girls had arrived, and they shared a lively dinner before Charlie and the twins went out afterward to meet their friends. Their noisy presence in the house reminded Olympia of how much she loved having all of her children at home.

On Thanksgiving morning Frieda arrived in time to help Olympia with dinner. Harry had made the stuffing, Olympia cooked the turkey, Frieda did the vegetables, Charlie made the corn muffins, the girls made sweet potatoes with marshmallows, and Olympia helped Max make whipped cream, to serve on the apple and pumpkin pies at the end of the meal. It was the one meal of the year when everyone contributed and made an effort, and the end result was stupendous. They sat down to dinner at six, and by eight o'clock, everyone was so stuffed, they couldn't move. And, as she always did, Olympia had provided a kosher meal just for Frieda, prepared by a kosher caterer the day before, which she said had been delicious too.

“I'm going to have to starve for the next three weeks, so I can get into my dress,” Frieda commented, after eating the pumpkin pie with the whipped cream on it that had been Max's contribution to the meal.

“Me too,” Ginny said, looking worried. Veronica had announced earlier that she had invited a boy called Jeff Adams to be her escort. She said she had met him at school. He was coming down for the weekend of the ball, and he had promised to rent a tux in Providence and bring it with him, so he didn't need to rent one in New York.

“I hope he's reliable,” Olympia said, looking slightly worried. “How well do you know him?”

“Well enough,” Veronica said casually. “I've been going out with him for about three weeks.”

“What happens if you stop dating him before the cotillion? That could be awkward.” Everyone always agreed that boyfriends made bad escorts, because if you stopped seeing them just before the ball, you could wind up without a date.

“He's just a friend,” Veronica said, looking unconcerned. She had agreed to make her debut, but without any enthusiasm. She was only doing it so her father wouldn't withdraw his share of the tuition for school. But she was still angry about his blackmail and manipulation. She had told everyone repeatedly that she fully anticipated having a rotten time at the ball. She was the original reluctant debutante, but Ginny more than made up for what her twin sister lacked in excitement about the event. She couldn't wait, and had tried on her dress four times in the last two days. It was the ballgown of her dreams. Charlie had checked the night he got back, and said his tuxedo still fit, although he said it was a little tight in the waist, but nothing he couldn't live with for one night.

Veronica had said that her escort wanted to meet Charlie and Ginny, but he had gone skiing in Vermont over the Thanksgiving weekend.

“What's he like?” Charlie asked with interest. It would be more fun for all of them if the two escorts got along and had something in common to chat about at the rehearsal and ball. It was going to be a long evening for them.

“He's on the football team, and he plays ice hockey, too,” Veronica told her brother.

“Maybe we can all go skating the next day,” Charlie said hopefully, “or to dinner or something. Is he excited to do it?”

“I don't know. I asked. He said he would. He doesn't have to love it. All he has to do is be there.” Veronica dismissed the possibility of his enjoying it, since she knew she wouldn't. In her opinion, neither would he.

“Has he ever been an escort at a deb ball before?” their mother inquired, as Veronica looked at her belligerently.

“I don't know. Why would he? Once would be enough for me.”

“Some guys actually enjoy it,” Olympia informed her, “hard as you may find that to believe.” She smiled at her, glad that she had finally agreed.

“I do find it hard to believe. It sounds like a major drag to me.”

“You may be pleasantly surprised by how much fun it is,” her mother said encouragingly, as Ginny smiled from ear to ear. She had been able to think of nothing else for the past many weeks.

Harry's mother stayed until nearly midnight. He put her in a cab and sent her home, and as he went out to help her, he saw that it was snowing.

By morning, the city was blanketed by snow. After lunch they all agreed to go to Central Park, and when they did, they wrapped garbage bags around their bottoms, and slid down the hills. Max rapidly became an expert at it, and Harry wasn't bad at it, either. It was a lot of fun, and Olympia laughed with pleasure as she slid down the hills. The girls lay in the snow, and made angels by waving their arms as far up and down as they could, making impressions that looked like wings in the fresh snow. They had been doing that since they were little children, and loved it more than ever. Afterward, they all went to Rockefeller Center, skated, and had dinner. After they got back to the house, they called their friends, figured out plans, and the three oldest ones went out shortly after to meet up with people, or hang out in their homes. Max was sound asleep by the time they left, exhausted after a long, busy day. He had worn himself out making a snowman with his older brother.

“It's been a wonderful Thanksgiving,” Olympia said to Harry as they got into bed and slid under the sheets. “It's so nice to have the kids home. I miss them so much when they're gone.” He knew she did. “I can't wait till they come home for winter break.” They were scheduled to come home the week before the ball. The ball he still refused to go to, and that Margaret Washington and Frieda were attending with her. Much as she loved them both, she would have preferred to have Harry at her side than them. But it was still not an option, as far as he was concerned. He was absolutely immovable about not going. He was making a statement about an event he profoundly disapproved of, and what he perceived as their discriminatory practices, by not attending, no matter how much it upset his wife. This was one time he was willing to upset her, and felt he had to, in order to be true to what he believed. In fact, no one cared if he went or not, except Olympia and his family.

The big announcement of the weekend was made by Virginia on Saturday morning. She had debated about telling them and, after a long cozy heart-to-heart with her mother after breakfast, decided she should. She never kept secrets from her, and loved sharing all the details of her life. Olympia had suspected something was going on with her, but as she no longer saw her every day, it was hard to find the right opportunity for Ginny to confide in her. Their after-breakfast chat gave Ginny the chance she needed to spill the beans. She was madly in love with a junior at Brown she said. He was the coolest boy she'd ever met. Like the boy Veronica was dating and bringing to the ball, he was on the football team. His name was Steve, and Ginny was head over heels in love with him, unlike Veronica, who liked her date, but for the moment was nothing more than friends with him. Ginny told her mother she had been seeing him three or four times a week for three months. And she asked if he could come to the ball, too. Olympia had reserved a table, and said she would save a seat for him. Ginny was thrilled. Since her brother was her official escort, there was no conflict in having Steve there, too. She said he was from Boston, from a very respectable family. He was a twin, too, and his brother was at Duke. From everything she said to Olympia, he sounded like a nice kid.