Coming Home for Christmas (16 page)

‘That’s not something you keep to yourself, Ali, that’s something you tell your family, for God’s sake. So that’s why you’ve got to spend Christmas at home.
How did it happen?’ Olivia topped up both their glasses and sat down beside Alison on the sofa, visibly stunned at the news.

‘My firm went to the wall, my boss committed suicide, we were all let go and it’s impossible to get a job in the financial sector. I’m living on what’s left of my savings
at the moment,’ Alison admitted, utterly relieved that someone knew and she didn’t have to keep it to herself any more.

‘Since when?’

‘Weeks ago—’

‘But how are you managing? I mean, the flight, Mam’s present
and
you gave me a cheque for half the cost of the party?’ her sister demanded, ashen at her sister’s
revelation.

‘Don’t worry, I’m not a pauper yet. I’d paid for the flight during the summer, I’d paid for the bracelet when I was let go and I had the money put by for the party.
I have some savings—’

‘But why didn’t you say anything? Why didn’t you
tell
us?’ Olivia stared at her, appalled at the knowledge that her younger sister had carried such a burden
alone.

‘I didn’t want to worry Mam and Dad. I didn’t want to ruin the party. I didn’t want everyone feeling sorry for me, especially Bert and Tessa and that other pair of oompa
loompas. I couldn’t bear their faux sympathy, because they’re the type to be delighted that I’ve come a cropper.’

‘Ah, shag them, who cares what they think?’ Olivia retorted.

‘I know, but it’s mortifying all the same. You know, I was flying high and now I’ve hit rock bottom, and my pride is dented as well as my bank balance.’ Alison
shrugged.

‘What are you going to do?’

‘I can ride it out for three more months. After that I’m on my uppers, and if I don’t get a job I’ll probably have to come home and sponge off Mam and Dad,’ said
Alison flatly.

‘Don’t say that,’ Olivia protested heatedly. ‘You know they wouldn’t think like that. We’re family, we muck in together. Michael and I’ll help you out.
I’m sure Leo would too until you get on your feet again. Promise if you’re absolutely stuck you’ll come to me.’ Olivia caught her by the hand. ‘I didn’t mean to
be a bitch, I’ve got fierce PMT and, I swear to God, I’m like a briar sometimes. I don’t know how Michael puts up with me,’ she said shakily, as tears came to her eyes.

‘Don’t be daft – he loves ya.’ Alison put her glass down and hugged her. ‘Let’s not fight,’ she said.

‘I’m really sorry, Ali, about everything – about whinging and moaning. If only I’d known.’

‘Forget it, you’ve every right to moan. I know it’s not easy for you. I don’t know how you do it, to be honest. You’re pulled in every direction. You’re
right, I do only have myself to think about,’ Alison admitted.

‘Ah, don’t mind me, I was just feeling sorry for myself.’ Olivia gave a teary grin.

‘Right back at ya, sis.’ Alison took a slug of wine and gave a rueful chuckle. ‘Look at the pair of us; if Michael comes in he’ll be horrified.’

‘He’d go mad knowing you never told us you were in trouble,’ Olivia said sombrely. ‘Promise me you’ll come to us if you need a helping hand.’

‘I promise, honest, but don’t say a word unless I tell you to. I’m not going to ruin Mam and Dad’s Christmas. They’re really enjoying it because we’re all
together.’

‘I won’t,’ agreed Olivia. ‘But no more secrets, OK?’

‘OK. Look, I might be lucky and get a job. Or I can move to Europe. I’ve Googled up a few positions that I could apply for. Actually, there was one in Dublin that would suit, there
may be more, so I’m not panicking.’

‘Could you not marry that guy Jonathan and divorce him and get a hefty settlement?’ Olivia arched an eyebrow at her.

Alison giggled tipsily. ‘If the worst comes to the worst, I’ll think about it.’

‘Isn’t there
anybody
you fancy?’ her sister asked hopefully.

‘Well, there’s this guy in my building. He’s Irish, he’s a fine thing and we get on great, but I only found out before I came home that his wife died in a car crash four
years ago, so he’s off the market. He comes home at Christmas to visit his parents and go to the grave. He’s going to be in Dublin in a few days’ time, so we’re going to
link up. But he has a lot of baggage and oh . . . I don’t know.’ She sighed.

‘A widower! Oh God it gets worse. What
are
we going to do with you?’ Olivia shook her head.

‘I know! Could you not have a bit of luck?’

‘At least you have Leo’s plot,’ Olivia said, drinking more wine and cutting her Sellotape in a rather crooked line.

‘A woman of property and a spinster to boot. I’d be the catch of the parish!’ Alison snorted.

‘Remember Tim Griffin?’ Olivia said slyly. ‘He said you were the finest-looking girl that ever went up to receive communion—’

‘Stop it. He was a dirty auld lecher. No wonder he never got married.’ Alison shuddered.

‘Well, he has twenty acres adjoining Leo’s land; it could be a match made in heaven,’ teased Olivia. ‘You could march up the aisle in your wellies, seeing as he never
wears anything else.’

‘Ha ha, you’re hilarious!’ But Alison laughed in spite of herself, glad that she didn’t have to carry the burden of her secret life on her own any more. They might have
their little tiffs, but she knew as sure as day turned into night that Olivia would always be there for her, and she too would always be on hand for her dearly loved sister, no matter what the
future held.

‘He’s come! He’s come!’ Lia was standing by Alison’s bed, shaking her. Light spilled in from the landing, making her blink rapidly several times.
She struggled to disorientated consciousness, from a deep sleep that was fuelled by the relief of confession and red wine. It seemed as though she had just laid her head on the pillow. ‘Who .
. . what . . .?’

‘Santa. Santa has come.’ The normally restrained Lia was almost bursting with glee, her fine, caramel hair mussed all over her head. Behind her Ellie was standing motionless, unable
to speak with the thrill of it all, her eyes two big blue orbs as she stared at Alison. With her halo of golden curls she looked almost angelic.

As she sat up, she could hear Kate screeching
piercingly
next door: ‘Mom, Dad, wake up, he’s come.’ She shook her head to clear it. At least she’d been woken with
a shake – screeching would have been unendurable with the state of her head!
And you think you might want children
, she thought in wry amusement as she struggled out of bed.

‘What time is it?’ Olivia mumbled as she staggered on to the landing, hair sticking straight up.

‘Something unearthly,’ Alison assured her.

‘Three thirty, not bad,’ Michael called, glancing at the alarm clock beside the bed as he struggled into his dressing gown.

‘Mom! Mom! I got a bike. We all got a bike!’ Lia was white with tiredness and excitement.

‘Mom! Mom! I got Swim To Me Puppy and Make Me Better with Rairity.’

‘And me and Lia got Diddl and Diddlina—’

‘Who?’ Alison was highly entertained at this stage.

‘Diddl and Diddlina,’ Kate said patiently. ‘They’re brilliant!’

‘Sounds faintly blue to me . . .’ whispered Alison to Olivia.

‘Stop it, you!’ Olivia snorted, as they followed the girls into their bedroom.

‘And Mom! The milk and cookies are gone, and the carrots have big teeth marks in them.’ Kate glanced over her shoulder as she knelt on the floor, pulling open the packaging on her
toys.

‘Go way! Big ones!’ Olivia glanced at Michael, who had manfully chewed two large carrots.

‘Massive!’

‘Don’t eat too many sweets now, Ellie,’ Olivia warned her youngest daughter, whose cheeks were bulging as she explored the contents of her Christmas stocking. It brought a
sudden rush of memories to Alison as she sat on Ellie’s bed watching the scene.

Memories of her and Olivia waking to feel the weight of something heavy against their feet. The exhilaration, tinged with a little fear. Had Santa come? Was he still in the house? The feeling of
absolute magic in the air. That one very special night where anything was possible. Racing into their parents’ room waving overflowing stockings. Racing back to the bedroom to explore their
toys. Her favourite had been a cash register that gave a ding when the drawer opened, just like a real one, and a shop with tiny jars of sweets and pretend packets of groceries. Looking at Ellie
chomping on her sweets, she remembered the thrill of being able to eat sweets in the middle of the night, knowing there’d still be more in the morning. The glee of rummaging in her sock to
find shiny new coins, a satsuma, the much longed for sweets, balloons, hair slides and hair bands and a plethora of other little goodies that brought joy to their childish hearts.

It really was a cycle, she thought as she watched Michael on his knees, with Ellie unpacking her Swim To Me Puppy, and Olivia’s head bent close to Lia’s as they studied a beautiful
book of illustrated Christmas stories.

Even though she was part of it, she felt a sudden surge of loneliness, wondering had she been right to focus so intensely on her career and let relationships fall by the wayside in her desire to
climb the ladder. Olivia had once said to her that she truly felt that women couldn’t have it all, career
and
motherhood, because both needed one hundred per cent attention. Watching
the way her sister had juggled work and family commitments the past week, she was beginning to agree with her. She knew if she’d had children, she’d never have been able to spend any
amount of decent time with them if she was working the way she’d been working in New York. She would have had to hire a nanny, like many of her colleagues did. Mothers working outside the
home had a hard treadmill to run on. Was it worth it in the end, she wondered, all the struggling and juggling? Even though her sister worked just mornings, she seemed to be always rushing around;
she rarely sat down, except for an hour or two at night.

But she was making a huge success of rearing her girls. They were lively, happy, confident little beings, completely secure in life – what a high achievement was that? Alison acknowledged
this as she watched Olivia completely engrossed in the Diddl and Diddlina that Kate was showing her, while Ellie had a little arm around her mother’s neck pointing out some new discovery in
her stocking. Michael was admiring a pair of swanky hair combs that Lia had got.

There was a lot more to life than work and wealth and high living, thought Alison ruefully. For all her hard work and all the money she’d earned and invested, and all the high living
she’d done, she didn’t have a huge amount to show for it. Maybe it was time for a rethink, she reflected as Ellie came and nuzzled up close to her to show her a pen with a pink fairy on
top that she’d got in her stocking. Alison lifted her on to her lap and held her close as she examined the pen.

‘You know, Auntie Alison, you’re very good at snuggling,’ her niece informed her matter-of-factly.

‘Am I?’ she said, rather pleased with this unexpected compliment.

‘Yes, you’re a very good snuggler,’ Ellie said firmly, waving the twinkling fairy this way and that.

‘High praise,’ said Olivia, who had overheard the comment.

‘It certainly is.’ Alison smiled. ‘I feel just as proud as the day I got my degree.’

‘Right, ladies, back into bed. We have early Mass, and we don’t want you yawning on the altar when you’re doing your play.’ Olivia hauled herself up off the floor.

‘I’m bringing Swim To Me Puppy to bed,’ Ellie yawned, leaning against Alison’s shoulder.

‘Good idea, he’d probably like a cuddle in bed,’ Alison said, as she slipped the little girl under the duvet and tucked her up snug.

‘Why have you no little girls?’ her niece asked, in that very direct way children have.

‘Er . . . ah . . . Holy God didn’t give me any yet.’ She managed what she thought was a perfectly reasonable explanation.

‘Well, I’m going to ask him to give you some. But you need a daddy too, don’t you?’

‘Umm—’

‘Daddy and husband are the same thing at the moment,’ murmured Olivia, smirking at her sister and enjoying the discussion immensely.

‘I’d guessed,’ Alison said dryly. ‘You say your prayers to Holy God and we’ll see what happens.’ She kissed Ellie lightly on the forehead. ‘Go back to
sleep now, pet. ’Night girls, see you in the morning.’ She blew a kiss to the twins as they clambered into bed.

‘’Night, Auntie Alison,’ they called sleepily.

‘Sleep tight, don’t let the bugs bite,’ added Lia, blowing her a kiss back.

Smiling, Alison slid back under her duvet and burrowed into the slight hollow in the bed. This time last year she had been sipping mulled wine at a party in a snazzy penthouse in Aspen with
fabulous views and she thought she was having the most fantastic Christmas. She’d felt so smug about it she’d almost felt sorry for anyone who wasn’t her. And tonight, she
wouldn’t swap where she was or whom she was with for a million dollars . . .
and
she was a very good snuggler to boot. That was an accolade she would treasure for the rest of her life.
She smiled in the dark as the house became silent again, apart from the companionable creaks and groans of floorboards and pipes and a gurgling immersion that reminded her of her small studio. She
wondered how JJ was getting on, knowing that he would probably visit his wife’s grave on Christmas Day, while she was being cosseted and cherished by her nearest and dearest. She found
herself saying a prayer for him, and she hadn’t said prayers for anyone for as long as she could remember. This Christmas was bringing her back to basics in more ways than one, Alison thought
drowsily as her eyes closed and she drifted into a dreamless sleep.

It was a bright, crisp, cold sunny morning as Olivia and her brood set off down the street to walk to church. Michael and Alison were tidying up. Olivia had to bring the girls
to the church three-quarters of an hour early so they could change into their costumes for their nativity play. Their breath froze vapour-white in the frosty air, and Ellie was entranced, huffing
and puffing her way down the path as she followed her older sisters, who were hopping and skipping like two marionettes. Olivia watched her three precious gifts and her heart lifted. How lucky she
was, she reflected, to have three healthy, happy children, a good and loving husband, parents to cherish and a job to pay the bills. She’d often compared her life to Alison’s and felt
hers was humdrum and a tad boring even, but no more. After last night’s revelation, she felt utterly sorry for her sister. Her career, in which she had invested so much time and effort, was
in tatters – temporarily anyway – her best friend was on another coast, the guy she’d been dating seemed somewhat shallow, to say the least. She wouldn’t want to swap places
with her under any circumstances.