Authors: Audrey Stover
Susan felt the back of her neck tingle and a shiver
slithered down her spine. She knew Craig was at the door of her office before
she even turned around. When she did, he was standing there with a look in his
eyes that made her knees turn to Jell-O. She held onto the file cabinet she was
standing next to for support. "Craig."
"I didn't think I'd ever see you again."
"Now you've seen me twice in one day. You're on a
roll,” she said with a smile as she gave her weak knees a rest by sitting in
the chair behind her desk. She motioned to a chair on the other side of her
desk, "Please, have a seat."
Craig ambled over to the chair making her catch her breath
at his smooth grace. "Thank you. And thank you for this," he said
holding up the bill with zeros on it. "You won't get in trouble, will
you?"
She smiled, "You're welcome. And no, I won't get in
trouble."
He just looked at her for what seemed like minutes but was
probably only a handful of seconds, but she started to fidget under his
scrutiny none-the-less.
"You are more beautiful today than you were the last
time I saw you, what ten years ago?"
"Twelve. It's been twelve years. But thank you again.”
She said as color suffused her cheeks, whether from the pleasure of his
compliment or embarrassment from remembering how long it had been since they
had seen each other, she wasn't really sure.
He looked at her hands as she fidgeted nervously with her
pen. She quickly set the pen down and folded her hands on her desk. She looked
up and her gazed clashed with his.
"You’re not married?" He asked, sounding relieved
and amazed at the same time.
She looked at her ring-less left hand and covered it with
her right hand. "No, not yet."
A light went out of his eyes, "But there is
someone?"
Susie thought about letting him think there was, but she
had never been the kind of woman to lie to make a man jealous. “No, there is no
one right now." She cleared her throat. "How about you? Got a wife
and a passel of kids waiting at home?" She asked, remembering how he had
always said he wanted a lot of kids. That had been one of the things that they
had not agreed on.
Craig chuckled a little and shook his head. "No, not
yet," he said, copying the answer she had given to him.
"I'm surprised."
He shrugged, "I just haven't met the right woman
yet."
Susan tried to not let him see how that remark hurt her.
When she looked back up at him there was a tender expression in his eyes that
almost made here angry. She didn't want his pity. She stood up quickly.
"Well, it was nice seeing you again."
He stood also, albeit reluctantly, "Yes, it was
wonderful seeing you again also."
She moved toward the door, but he stepped in front of her
to stop her. "Susie,” he said softly.
She stepped back and shook her head, "I really need to
get back to work. My employees are great, but this restaurant doesn't run
itself."
"Your employee... You're Nana?"
"No, my Nana is Nana."
"This is your grandma's restaurant?"
"No, it's mine."
"Susie, that's wonderful! No wonder the food was so
good.” He said with a smile that sent her heart thumping.
She looked away from him, "Thank you. But I really do
need to get back to work."
"Of course," he said as he headed toward the
door. He stopped suddenly and turned around.
Susie, who had started to follow him, couldn't stop in time
and collided straight into his broad chest. His arms came around her and she
felt a feeling she hadn't felt with any of the boyfriends she had had since
Craig: a feeling of safety and coming home. She looked up into his face and
thought how easy it would be to kiss him. That insane thought made her quickly
move away. It couldn't be a good thing to be having feelings like this with a
man who had rejected her.
"Can I see you again sometime?" He asked.
Oh boy, she thought to herself. I can't even be in his
presence for ten minutes without having a desire to kiss him, seeing him again
is probably the last thing in this world I should be considering. But that
didn’t stop her from considering it anyway.
"For a cup of coffee or something," he added.
She started to shake her head.
"I think we need to talk, Susie."
"Talk," she said almost unbelievingly and shook
her head.
"Yeah,"
"I think we've talked enough."
"I've got some things I would like to tell you."
"I don't know,” she hedged, feeling herself starting
to give in.
"Come on, Susie. Humor me."
She rolled her eyes, "Maybe we should just let bygones
be bygones and leave it at that.” She opened the door for him and held out her
hand, "It was nice seeing you again, Craig."
He looked at her hand for a moment before he took it in
his. The touch of his hand sent such a wave of feeling through her that she
looked at him in shock.
"I'll see you sometime soon, Susie. I believe God put
you back in my life for a reason."
Susan pulled her hand out of his. He would have to bring
God into this. "I seriously doubt it. Have a nice day," she said
dismissively, holding the door open for him.
Craig smiled at her. "You too, Susie. I'll see you
soon,” he said as he walked away.
Susie opened her mouth to naysay him and then clamped it
shut. He was just as obstinate now as he had been back when they were dating.
Craig smiled as he drove to his office.
Lord, You
brought Susie back into my life. Thank You, I think
. He thought about the
way she had coolly dismissed him when he had mentioned God.
Obviously she
still doesn't know Jesus as her personal Savior, but I do believe You brought
us back into each other's life for a reason. I pray that You will help me stay
within Your will regarding that reason, whatever it may be. I want to do Your
will with every breath I take, Lord. Please help me to follow Your leading. I
think I still have some very strong feelings for her.
He thought about how
she had fallen against him. The feelings that had coursed through him were
nothing like what he had felt when they had been dating. These were feelings of
protectiveness and something deeper that he couldn't name, or didn't want to
name. He would have gladly held her longer if she hadn't practically jumped
away from him. He chuckled; she was approachable yet prickly as a porcupine at
the same time. He wondered how she managed to accomplish that.
He did want to talk with her, though. Even if God didn't
plan for them to have anything more than a friendship, he needed to apologize
for the way he had treated her all those years ago.
He’s here again, Susan," Jean said as she stuck her
head around the door to Susan's office.
"Who?" Susan asked with a sinking feeling she
knew exactly who was here again.
"Mr. Good-looking," Jean answered with a lift of
her eyebrows.
"His name is Craig,” Susan said in defeat. She had a
feeling that he would come around again, but not the very next day. "Did
he ask to see me?" She asked as she started to reluctantly get up.
"No, he asked to see Cindy."
Susan fell back into her chair. “Cindy? Cindy isn't working
today."
"I know that and you know that but he didn't know
that, until a few minutes ago."
"What table is he sitting at?"
"He’s not sitting at a table."
"What’s he doing then?"
Jean shrugged her shoulders, "I'm not sure. He may
have left. I just wanted to let you know he was here."
Susan bit her tongue to keep from saying something she
would regret later and nodded her head. She rolled her eyes as Jean walked
away. Jean was a very good employee, but her penchant for gossiping just about
drove Susan crazy. Especially now when it involved Craig.
She dropped her head into her hands. Craig, who she had
thought was out of her life forever had now been back in it two days in a row.
Well, not exactly today, she hadn't actually seen him. Why would he ask to see
Cindy? She was only twenty years old for Pete's sake. He was thirty-four; she
knew this because he was two years older than her. Of course, a lot of men
liked younger women.
She had once seen an article that talked about how the
older men got, the more they were attracted to younger women. The older a woman
got, the less likely it was for her to find a man her own age. She shook her
head, that was too depressing to think about. She wondered if Craig had left or
if he was still here. Perhaps he was just ordering something from the bakery
counter. She decided to just go look, mentally kicking herself as she walked
out of her office. She wondered what she planned on doing if he were still
here.
She entered the bakery and to-go order area of the
restaurant to see Craig laughing with Beth who was working the counter. Susan
felt a blip of pure green jealousy zing through her heart. She squelched it
just as Craig turned her way. He was taking a bite of a pastry and Susan felt
her heart flip in her chest. The years really had improved on his already good
looks. She clenched her hands in front of her to keep from smoothing her hair
down.
"This is absolutely wonderful, Susie."
Susan ignored Beth's raised eyebrows as she stepped a
little closer, "Which one is it?"
"Bump and drop raspberry puff."
Susan felt her face flush.
"Beth was just telling me how it got its unusual
name."
"Oh really?"
"Mm-hmm..." He said around a mouthful of the
flaky pastry with a nod of his head. "Sounds familiar,” he said after
swallowing, with a smile that sent her pulse racing.
"Yes, well, actually Jean named it,” she said, finally
giving into the urge to smooth her hair down. She didn't know why she felt so
dowdy in Craig's presence.
He shrugged his shoulders, "It's still wonderful.” He
took a sip of coffee. "Your coffee is good too," he said raising his
cup.
Susan tilted her head to the side, "Thanks." They
were silent for a few moments then Susan cleared her throat, "So you came
to see Cindy?"
Craig shook his head, "No, not exactly."
Susan just raised her eyebrows.
"What I mean to say is that I came to see you, I just
asked if Cindy was here because I wanted to give her something."
Susan's eyebrows went up a notch further.
Craig looked over at Beth who was watching them with avid
interest. He smiled at her, "Thank you, Beth. Here's a tip.” He handed her
a dollar then he looked back at Susan, "Can we go somewhere to talk?”
Susan looked at the growing line of customers and gave Beth
a non-verbal signal to get back to her duties. She observed as Beth turned her
attention to the next customer, then she looked back at Craig. He was watching
her with a look of pride and respect. Her hand started to move to smooth down
her pixie hair-cut again, but she stopped herself and rubbed the back of her
neck instead, "Why don't we go outside?"
Craig nodded his head and motioned for her to go ahead of
him. He followed her to a corner table on the patio of the restaurant. Setting
his cup of coffee and pastry down on the table he realized that she didn't have
anything.
"Do you want a cup of coffee or something?" He
asked, preparing to go back inside to procure her a cup of coffee.
"No, I'm fine,” she said with a smile that warmed his
heart.
She was more than fine in his book he thought as he nodded
his head and sat down. “I'm proud of you, Susie. You always said that you
wanted to have your own bakery and now look at you, not only a bakery, but a
restaurant also. And a successful one by the looks of it."
Susan nodded her head, "Yes, business has been good
lately."
"Well, if all of your food is as good as what I had
yesterday and today, it is probably hard for people to stay away once they have
tasted it." He smiled as he saw her face flush with pleasure.
"Thank you."
"Why did you call it Nana’s?"
"My Nana gave me the money for the down-payment."
"She didn't make you call it Nana's, though."
Susan smiled, "No, you know my Nana. She would never
insist on something like that. I just wanted to show her how much I love her.
Plus many of the items we serve are her original recipes."
"Including the bump and drop raspberry puff?"
Susan's face got a shade redder, "No, that was
something I've been working on for a few weeks now."
He smiled and nodded his head as he watched her. She was
even more beautiful than he remembered her being.
Susan fidgeted under his gaze.
"How is your Nana, by the way?"
"She’s doing well, but I'm sure you didn't come here
to find out how I got the name of my restaurant."
"Maybe not, but I am interested, just the same."
"Do you want me to give something to Cindy for
you?"
"Cindy?" He asked not quite following her train
of thought.
"You said that you have something to give to her. Do
you want to leave it here for me to give her when she comes into work
tomorrow?"
Craig felt his face heat up a little bit and hoped Susan
couldn't tell. "It’s not anything big," he said as he pulled a
business card out of his front shirt pocket and handed it to her. "I don't
even know if she'll want it."
Susan looked at the business card, "You want to give
her your business card.” She said in a tone that made him wonder what she was
thinking.
"Yes, for her boyfriend."
She gave him a confused look, "You know her
boyfriend?"
"No."
Susan laid the business card on the table and took a deep
breath. "You want to give Cindy’s boyfriend one of your business cards,
but you don't know him.” She tilted her head in a way that made him want to hug
her. "Can I ask why?"
"I overheard her talking to one of the other
waitresses about him needing a job and that he's in construction." He
shrugged his shoulders, "I thought maybe I could help."
Susan nodded her head, "You always were gung-ho about
helping other people."
"Is that a bad thing?"
"No, I guess not. Just a little tiring."
"For me or you?"
"Me."
He searched her face, "Why?"
She waived her hand dismissively, "I don't know. Is
that why you stopped by here today?"
He smiled, "In a hurry to get rid of me?"
"No, of course not."
He watched her over the rim of his cup as he took a drink
of his previously forgotten coffee.
"What?"
"I can't tell you how good it is to see you again. You
are more beautiful than the last time I saw you."
"Which would have been yesterday," she said
dryly.
He chuckled, "Touché. What I mean is that you get more
beautiful every time I see you."
"Oh, well, thank you."
"Would you like to go out for dinner with me Friday
night?"
Susan puffed a breath out as if she had been holding it
then shook her head, "I don't think so, Craig.”
"Why not?"
"I just don't think it would be a good idea."
"Because...?"
"Because there are still things we just don't agree
on," she said as she held up his business card which was emblazoned with
the Christian fish symbol.
He tried to hide his disappointment at her continued lack
of interest in anything Christian. "Fair enough. But we could still go out
as old acquaintances."
She shook her head.
"I'm not asking for a lifetime commitment, Susie. Just
dinner with a friend."
He saw her stiffen, "I didn't think you were asking me
for a lifetime commitment, Craig."
"Susie, I'm sorry, I know you didn't think that,” he
said mentally kicking himself. This was not going the way he had imagined it
going. "I just want to take you out for a casual friendly dinner at
Phil's BBQ."
Her eyes lit up. "I haven't been there in ages."
"Best BBQ ribs in town," he said as he could see
her wavering.
"I know. How did you remember BBQ ribs are one of my
favorites?"
"I remember everything about you."
Susan's eyebrows shot up in surprise and then a flush crept
into her face. "I don't know Craig."
"Will you at least think about it?"
"Well, okay, I'll think about it. But I'm not making
any promises."
Craig smiled at her, "One dinner at Phil's - it's worth
thinking about."
Susan looked at her reflection in the mirror and grimaced.
Craig was as persistent now as he had been way back when. He had stopped by her
restaurant again yesterday to ask if she had decided to go out to dinner with
him or not. She had been all prepared to call him to let him know that her
answer was no. Then he had shown up and she just couldn't say no to him. She
knew she should, but she couldn’t make her mouth say that simple word.
She went back to her closet to see what else she had to
wear. She didn't know why she was so nervous about this dinner. "It’s not
like I'm trying to impress him for Pete's sake!" She told herself for the
hundredth time.
She decided that the printed blouse with tan capris and
sandals would do for Phil's BBQ. She quickly changed and freshened her make-up.
She went to pick up her purse as the doorbell rang.
She opened the front door and in vain willed her erratic
pulse to calm down. He was too good-looking for his own good and the cologne he
was wearing just about put her out of her mind it smelled so good. It should be
illegal for a man to look and smell so good. She thought to herself in
disgust.
"I hope I'm not too early." He moved to enter her
duplex apartment.
"No, I'm actually ready to go," she said as she
stood in front of him. She was probably being extremely silly, but she didn't
want to let him into her home. Not because she was afraid of him, but because
she was afraid of her own feelings when he was around. Or when she looked at
him. Or when she thought about him.
"Okay," he said as he stepped back and let her
come out of the apartment and shut the door. He checked the knob to make sure
she had locked it.
She frowned at him as that action brought back numerous
memories of when they had lived together.
He looked at her and saw her frown, "Sorry,
habit."
She shook her head. "It’s okay. I understand,"
she said, trying to get back to a feeling of two friends going out for a bite
to eat.
She was thankful for the small talk that Craig kept up as
they drove to the restaurant. She was not in the mood for a deep conversation.
Or maybe she was just afraid of what a deep conversation with this man she had
once loved would evoke: the feelings, the memories and the pain. She still
couldn't believe that he had reappeared in her life. When they had broken up
all those years ago, she figured she would never see him again. Now she had
seen him four days in a row. But this would be the last time she would see him.
It was just too weird to be with him like this. Too weird to be with the man
she had thought she would be married to by now, but wasn't because he had to go
and get religious on her. She shook her head and looked out at the scenery as
they drove.