Coming Clean (5 page)

The ached slipped from his chest to swell his cock. They were so close. It wouldn’t take much to shift, to lean sidewise and touch him. Grant wanted to but he couldn’t make his body move. Maybe he was still a little afraid. Or maybe he wanted too much.

“Yeah, I’ve thought about it. I know you, Grant. You’ve looked at every angle, every possible outcome before opening your mouth. What are you looking for?”

Cade was close enough for Grant to see each individual eyelash and eyebrow. They weren’t straight blonde but a random fusion of gold, yellow and pale tan. His lips ached to press to those tiny hairs, to feel the tension ease under his kiss. “No clue. I’m a rookie here. But I’m a good player and I learn fast. Teach me.”

A soft command husked with gravelly texture. “Tell me what you’re thinking right now.” His sultry tone slithered across the air, shedding a skin of doubt and revealing scales of lust and promise.

“Wondering what your mouth feels like.”

The forthright and immediate answer sent Cade straight back against the dryer with a sharp inhale. His chest heaved, his pupils dilated and a pale pink tongue inched out to skate across his lip.

A shiver formed at the base of Grant’s spine and worked its way outward until each muscle quaked with unfamiliar expectation. He was powerless, a cork in a sea of fate. Somehow, his course was set and the ride promised to be delectable. His mouth watered in anticipation.

The almost-visible acknowledgment of his sincerity triggered Cade’s predatory grin. Excitement bordering on arousal coursed through Grant as he recognized the look. This was Cade closing in on a sexual encounter. He’d seen it in bars, at ball games and once in a hardware store. A seductive quality washed through Cade, invisible yet present in the languid way he moved, the heavy-lidded slant of his eyes, the simmering gaze.

He bent his leg until his knee made contact with Grant’s thigh. Masculine heat warmed where they touched. A burn formed as he held his breath, aware that this step, this move, contained a challenge. So far, nothing more than words had been exchanged. It was crunch time, either walk away or commit to more. Cade was allowing him an escape or a foothold. The choice was his.

Purposefully, Grant flexed his leg half an inch and bumped back. A warm, hard palm landed above his knee. Grant’s lids dropped without thought as the heat increased through his jeans with a gentle squeeze. He lowered his right hand to Cade’s thigh. A single thumb stroke shouted his understanding.

Inside the denim, Cade’s muscle tightened. Challenge accepted.

“How drunk are you?” Cade’s husky tone slid out with a seductive purr.

“I’m not. I know exactly what I’m doing.”

The firm hand on his leg slid higher, massaging his thigh. “Will this—anything that happens—screw our friendship? I don’t want to lose that.”

“No, it won’t. I can’t lose you, either. You’re more than a friend, Cade, you know that. You’re part of me.”

“So this is what, like a new level of best friends?”

“I don’t know,” Grant said. “But it’s something that’s been brewing for years. I think it’s time we owned up to it, don’t you?”

“Yeah, I do. Come on, let’s get off this hard-ass floor and go…to the living room or something. Can you stand?”

“Yeah.”

Cade rose effortlessly then cupped Grant’s elbow to steady him. All he felt was immediate crackling warmth until a sharp twinge zinged the second he put weight on his foot. He sucked in a fast breath.

Cade stepped in front of him and gripped his shoulders. “Okay?”

“I think so. I almost forgot about it. Just took me by surprise.”

He looked straight into Cade’s eyes and his stomach lurched. Sparks flying was a metaphor Grant rarely thought about except literally, as in grounding wires and blow torches, but it wouldn’t have surprised him if a bright arc of electricity sizzled between them. They stood close enough for him feel the hot breath on his cheeks, smell the sweet dust of birch and soft maple, see the flare of nostrils when Cade inhaled deeply. Not one word was said but Grant knew exactly what Cade was thinking, could read it in his eyes.

“Go ahead,” Cade whispered. Hot butter on warm bread, the slightly Southern voice bathed the space in intimate sensuality. “If this is something you really want, I need you to make the first move.”

The words jolted through Grant like a thousand volts. His chest rose with his slow inhale before he cupped Cade’s jaw, skimming a thumb across his mouth. Strength and firm bone filled his palm, foreign, different and alluring. A soft tongue darted out, licking a tiny taste of his skin. Grant shivered, closed his eyes and dipped his head.

He took the step he’d been too terrified to take over twenty years ago. He kissed his best friend.

The grazing kiss barely touched their lips but Cade didn’t try to return it. This was Grant’s exploration and he allowed it, unhurried and uncontested. His heart jackhammered, pummeling his ribs. The desperate need to deepen the light peck scoured through him but he refused. He would not let loose the famished need inside him too quickly and fuck this up.

Once the first contact was breached, the touch increased. Grant pressed his mouth firmer, moving cautiously but inquisitively. Much like a teenager giving his first timid kiss, he seemed interested but unsure. After several seconds, Cade allowed himself to respond, echoing the gentle, innocent motions. His encouragement prolonged the union.

A sobering thought planted a deep ache in his chest. He was taking Grant’s male innocence with this single exploring kiss. Even if it never went further than lips on lips for these few seconds, this would forever change the way Grant thought about himself as a man, a husband and a human being. Cade quietly vowed not to let him ever feel like it was a mistake, to regret this move. If this was as close to Grant as he ever got sexually, it would be enough.

Grant pulled away and drew a measured breath. Cade couldn’t read his expression. This was not a side of Grant he’d ever seen. He’d seen him turned on, charged up, but never in a sexual experiment. They’d been too frantic as teens to appreciate the moment, a loss he’d reflected on more than once. Was Grant going to shrug this off as a fail?

He couldn’t disguise the rough hunger in his voice. “Well? Was it what you expected?”

“No.” Grant shook his head. “It was better.”

He moved forward to bring their lips together again and Cade shifted his face away. “Wait. Is Viv okay with this? I mean…this could be seen as you cheating.”

Grant’s slight grin eased his tightened gut. “She’s okay with it. She told me to go for it if the opportunity came up so, yeah, I went for it. Now I’m going for it again.”

Opening his lips, Cade eagerly accepted the more aggressive kiss, his tongue stroking Grant’s. A man kissed differently than a woman, something he knew Grant was just discovering. Mouths were harder, the skin and muscle around it rougher. His faint five o’clock shadow sounded a soft grating rasp on Grant’s palm and the harsh calluses cupping his neck sparked tingles all the way down his spine. Hands had entered into the equation so he let his slide along Grant’s waist.

Tongue to tongue, taking time to taste and discover, Cade drank in Grant’s somehow familiar and yet totally unknown flavor. His balls tightened as strong fingers sank into his hair, angling his head to deepen the kiss even more. Kissing had never been so erotic. Each tongue touch was like losing his virginity all over again. He was kissing, was being kissed by,
Grant
.

He slid his fingers through Grant’s belt loops and stepped closer, grinding his growing erection into another rising one. Exploration turned to lust. Grant’s hand stroked down his back but hesitated before going lower. It glided over his back pocket then lightly squeezed his ass. A low murmur rumbled but Cade had no idea who made it, Grant or him. He didn’t care, licking a lip he’d traced a thousand times in his mind. The hard ridge grew against his lower stomach, and their jagged breaths mingled and joined.

It had been so long since he’d been with another man, he’d nearly forgotten the zinging tremors that gripped his gut with masculine tang. There was something more intoxicating than alcohol about feeling hands and lips similar in shape and size to your own touch you. Grant definitely liked kissing, and each lick and nibble pumped more yearning through Cade. His control cracked, and he had to pull away before he moved too fast or tried to give more than Grant might be ready to accept. It took more determination to angle his head back than he could ever have imagined.

Grant didn’t move his hands, seemingly reluctant to part. His expanded pupils all but obliterated his normal coffee-colored eyes, and a lusty haze shaded the thin visible ring to burnt maple. His heart pounded like a bass drum, and Cade’s matched the tempo. Counting himself lucky there was only an inch height difference between them, Cade tipped his head until they were touching forehead to forehead. Grant never backed away.

“Ground rules.” Scratching in a lust-hoarse voice, his words were feather soft.

Grant licked his lip before nodding his head.

The wiggle of their skin made Cade smile. “First, only what you want. No pressure for anything more, got it? Slow is fine and stopping is better than regrets.”

Grant nodded once.

“Second, no is no, period. There isn’t any talking around something. If it’s a no, it’s a no.”

Again, a dark head bobbed his understanding.

“Third.” Cade tilted his head and smiled softly. “If it feels good, it’s all right. Nothing is off limits until you say so. I just want to make you feel good, Grant.”

He leaned in to initiate another kiss but Grant moved backward. “I have a ground rule of my own. I have no clue what the fuck I’m doing, so you have to take point. I feel like a virgin on prom night here. I’ll follow your lead and assume if you make a move, it’s all right to return it. Okay?”

“Deal. Now, why are we standing in your laundry room talking about this?”

“Just seemed like the right time.” A flirty grin widened Grant’s mouth. “Besides, is there a better place to come clean with you?”

Cade touched that smile, felt the curves and angles of lips moist from his own. He let his fingers slide down, past Grant’s sternum, over his tight stomach, to the button of his pants. The touch was bold and aggressive and he watched for a reaction. So far, other than a heavy-duty make-out session, no boundaries had been tested.

Grant didn’t shy away. In fact, the hand on his ass kneaded more firmly.

No, Grant was definitely not pulling away.

Cade let his palm shift lower, flattening over the zipper until it cupped Grant’s hard cock through his jeans. The ridges and cords of his neck bulged with a swallow but he thrust his hips slightly, pushing into the touch. Cade stepped back, putting as much sexual need in his expression as he could. “There’s one place that’s better for coming clean. I need to wash up and you need to wash that cut. Shower with me.”

Grant’s eyes widened a bit but he nodded. “Master shower is bigger.”

Cade hid his smile. He knew that, had laid the heavy slate tile himself one Friday night while Grant connected plumbing and glued joints. Grant’s nerves shone through with that statement but his hand barely tremored as it secured the bourbon cap. He left the liquor on the kitchen counter and led the way down the hall to the master suite. The slight jerk in his carefully balanced limp drew Cade’s attention to the broad line of his shoulders.

How far did Grant want to let things go? He hadn’t hesitated with the “get naked” suggestion but then, as Granny used to say, “getting naked” was one thing, but “gettin’ nekkid” was a whole ’nother ballgame. They’d shared showers as ballplayers with a dozen other guys. The circumstances were different now, the stakes higher, the emotions running. At least they were for Cade.

Cade paused outside the bedroom. To him, this wasn’t a quick fuck. This was something deeper, something more. He was honest enough with himself to admit, finally, that he wanted more out of his best friends. What if it was purely experimentation to Grant? What if he didn’t like whatever was about to happen? Could Cade accept it if, after tonight, Grant wanted to revert to being just friends?

He steeled his jaw and stepped into the bathroom. He had no choice. Now that this thing was out in the open, he couldn’t walk away. If Grant backed down, then he would have to deal with it. It would hurt like a bitch, but not taking this to whatever level loomed ahead was unthinkable. It was better to be disappointed than never to take the chance, but he’d learned a lot from his divorce. He’d keep his heart under lock and key. He yanked his T-shirt off to hide the fear that shot through him.

Grant hooked his thumbs in his belt loops and leaned on the vanity, a lost expression rounding his brows. Tenderness welled from the pit of Cade’s stomach. He remembered too well the gut-cramping nerves before his first male encounter. In a split second, he decided to play it cool, keep it physical, not make this harder than it was. A swallowed snort burned his throat. If things got any harder, he was going to bust his zipper wide open.

With a contrived casualness, he stepped on the toe of his damp sock and pulled his foot free, first the left, then the right. Dark chocolate eyes fell to his hands when he unsnapped his jeans. The soft pop was a silenced revolver starting the action. Grant’s shuddered breath rang loud in the still air.

“Grant, relax. It’s a shower. Nothing happens you aren’t ready for.” Cade crossed to stand in front of the toilet. Making his bladder release took concentration. His cock ached with the firm weight of an oak four-by-four. But the natural action was non-threatening, non-aggressive and served as filler for the shedding of clothes. Before he flushed, he heard the soft rustle of cotton behind him.

Grant’s blue T-shirt lay crumpled in the sink. In the mirror, his skin gleamed like polished bronze, and Cade’s fingers twitched to run through the dark hair swirled in the center of his chest. His worn jeans hugged every curve and highlighted the cut of each muscle along his back. Cade jerked his attention away and opened the linen closet beside the toilet.

“We’re going to make more laundry. Viv’s going pass a brick,” he joked.

Grant grinned. “I think we can distract her from dirty towels if we put our minds to it.”

Cade leaned into the shower and snapped the water to hot, taking too much time to adjust the temperature. Without looking over his shoulder, he shed his jeans and underwear, then stepped inside the tiled double-wide stall.

He’d kidded Grant about the shower, calling it a hedonistic extravagance when he’d designed the damn thing with wall-to-wall dark gray slate and dual overhead cascading heads. He tilted his head back and let the water flow over him. The torrents that rained down were like erotic fingerless caresses. After grabbing a bottle of shampoo off the ledge, he soaped his hair, wondering if Grant was going to join him or if he’d changed his mind. The hand that slid up his back tightened his stomach.

“This okay?” Grant murmured, stroking his shoulders and spine. The strong fragrance of soap filled the enclosure, and slick fingers glided across his skin.

“Yeah.” His voice cracked like a prepubescent boy.

It was more than okay. It was a feast of sensations—of soft soap, hard hands and hot water. Hotter anticipation roiled through him. Ten seconds ago, he’d thought the shower was huge. Now it seemed too small, pressing Grant closer behind him. He gritted his teeth, refusing to turn around and hold Grant against that slate wall, sucking every inch of his body.

Slow. Slow. Slow.

Filling some weird looking sponge-thing with the creamy liquid soap, Cade tried to concentrate on washing, on letting Grant get used to being nude this close to him. His erection ached with need, and he couldn’t resist a few lathered pulls along his shaft but wished it was Grant’s hand, not his own. Strong fingers massaged with confident soapy strokes but never moved from his nape, shoulders and upper arms. Cade wanted those hands all over but fought the need.

Until Grant stepped closer.

The unintentional nudge of his hard cock into Cade’s hip obliterated his control. He quickly rinsed the suds from his hair then turned and tugged Grant into a blistering kiss. Grant eagerly responded, diving his tongue deep and humming in want. The rich sound bounced off the wet walls, channeling lust straight into Cade’s belly. Trapped between them, their cocks rubbed and slid in sensual friction. Grant stilled with a gasp.

He pulled from the kiss, letting his gaze drift down. Cade could appreciate the sight. Grant’s broad cockhead was darker next to his but no less swollen. Even under the water, a thick bead of pearly liquid leaked from the tip. Steam swirled around them with tropical humidity. Primal urges flared with red-hot intensity. Cade filled his palm with slick soap then boldly gripped Grant’s hard cock.

Grant’s eyes slammed closed and a grunted exhale carried the sharp tang of bourbon. Leisurely working one hand along the thick length, Cade used his free hand to cup Grant’s silky sac. Hard fingers bit into his biceps but a hesitant rocking rhythm pushed Grant deeper into his hold. Flesh grew harder under slippery soap bubbles, and Cade’s own cock jerked in selfish want.

“Touch me, Grant, please.”

There was no timidity in the response. Grant swiped his palm down a foamy trail then curled his coated hand around the base of Cade’s cock. Of course, this didn’t frighten him. This they had done before, long ago in Cade’s living room, watching his older brother’s stolen video. But this was also different. They were no longer virgin boys experimenting. They were grown men who knew exactly how they liked to be touched. Cade covered Grant’s hand with his own, tightening the hold. Grant added the twisting motion on his own and it curled Cade’s toes into the hard slate.

He must have made some sound, some involuntary reaction, because Grant jerked his head up, a cocky grin lifting to corners of his lips. His strokes got bolder, more commanding, confident, until Cade couldn’t catch the moan that fell from his tongue. Grant’s mouth caught it, licking it from his mouth and giving it back to him. Cade pulled his hands up and kneaded the hard muscles along Grant’s back.

A fine quiver in Grant’s voice hinted at his nerves. “Was that all right?”

“Perfect.” Cade nipped his chin, nuzzling under his jaw to drag his tongue to a scruffy Adam’s apple. The whiskers were jagged and sharp under his lips, scratching with a sensual bite. “Tell me about Viv, what does she like?”

Grant canted his head, giving him more access. “Oral. She loves to come on my tongue.”

“Can I go down on her? Are you okay with that?”

“Yes.” If possible, Grant’s cock got harder with that whispered permission. “She waxes, so her pussy’s slick and smooth. Make her come with your mouth first, then she can come easier from fucking. On a good night, she can orgasm three times to my one.”