Cold (26 page)

Rocky was obviously trying to come up with a reason, but her jaw snapped shut as she realised she didn't have one. "I don't know," she said quietly.

"How about computers or something?" Jo gave her hand a little shake, realising that, at last, Rocky was starting to think a little positively.

"Maybe."

"See?" She raised their linked hands and kissed the blonde's knuckles. "I want you to be happy, Sweetheart."

"I am," said Rocky.

Jo pulled into the courtyard and parked the car in front of her house. No sooner had they opened the boot than the front door opened and Edna greeted them. "I saw you drive in. I put the kettle on."

Jo heaved the bags out of the boot, and threw them inside the front door. "You go on up, I'll bring these," she said, and gently pushed the blonde towards her elderly friend.

Rocky followed Edna up the stairs and into the kitchen, pulling off her jacket and hanging it in the hallway as she went.

Edna stood against the sink, watching Rocky as she settled into one of the kitchen chairs. "How was it?"

"It was... hard." The blonde planted her elbows on the table and cradled her head in her hands. "Too many memories." She looked up at the woman from beneath pale hair. "But I'm glad I went."

The shrill whistle of the kettle interrupted them, and Edna turned to make the tea just as Jo stumbled into the hall with the bags.

"Come in here and sit yourself down," she called through the door. "I bet you drove the whole way without stopping."

"I was worried about the weather, didn't want to be out in it too late," said Jo as she sat, depositing a kiss on her lover's cheek as she passed.

"They do say it's going to get worse in the next few days. Cold front coming from the east." She put two mugs of tea in front of the two women. "I'll go gather my things."

Jo's eyes snapped up. "You don't have to go yet, Edna."

The old woman placed a gentle hand on the brunette's shoulder. "Yes, Jo. I do. It's been a pleasant few days here, but I've been out there too long." She shrugged and smiled at the confused look on Jo's face. "It's what I'm used to." She padded away quietly.

Rocky looked across at Jo. "You can't understand it, can you?"

Jo shook her head. "It's the worst winter for years, sub zero temperatures, and she'd rather be out in it than here. No, I don't understand."

"Same old story," said the blonde.

Jo shrugged.

"The feeling of imposing, of being a burden."

Jo leaned towards the blonde. "You," she pointed a finger in Rocky's direction, "are not going back out there."

"No, I know," she said with a small smile. "But I have something Edna doesn't."

"What's that?"

"You."

Jo chuckled and leaned across capturing the blonde's lips. "That's true," she said, her breath warm on Rocky's mouth.

"I'm ready," said Edna, dropping her bags just outside the kitchen door. "I'll need to find another trolley; I don't think mine will be where we left it."

Jo leaned back, away from the blonde and turned in her seat to face the old woman. "Can I finish my tea?"

Edna huffed and settled herself in the spare kitchen chair, watching as Jo and Rocky sipped their tea as slowly as they could.

So it was an hour later that Jo opened the door of the car and allowed Edna to settle herself in the passenger seat. The tall woman turned back to the blonde framed in the doorway. "Are you sure you won't come?" Jo took a couple of steps back towards Rocky.

Rocky nodded. "Yeah, I'm sure. I don't think I want to go back there yet." She turned Jo in the direction of the car. "Besides, I have three days of washing to sort out."

Jo resisted the gentle pushing and turned back, gathering the small woman in her arms. "I won't be long."

"Make sure you're not." She frowned slightly. "Shouldn't you take a jacket?" she asked noticing Jo only had a sweatshirt on along with her jeans and sneakers.

"I'm fine. I'll be gone an hour at the most," she ducked her head and nipped at soft lips. "I love you," she whispered.

"Love you, too." Rocky gave her a shove, and stepped back into the doorway, wrapping her arms around her in an attempt to keep out the cold. "Now go," she said, with a smile.

Jo pouted, and slowly got into the car.

The blonde waved to her friend as the Merc pulled slowly out of the courtyard, then she closed the door and made her way straight to the laundry room.

She had just emptied the contents of their travel bag on the floor when the door bell rang. "What have you forgotten now?" she muttered under her breath as she reached for the handle and opened the door.

Before her stood a nightmare, a smiling nightmare.

"Michelle," the tall man said, reaching for her.

Rocky felt her knees unlock and she staggered backwards, tripping over the bottom stair. She sat heavily, watching as the man quietly closed the door and turned back towards her. "It's been so long," he said as he crouched in front of her and cupped a cheek already wet with tears. "I've missed you so much."

Her mind struggled to comprehend what was happening. It couldn't possibly be, could it? She'd been so careful, stayed away. Surely by now he thought her dead. But no, here he was. He'd come for her.

"I searched for you," he said, pulling her to her feet and crushing her in an embrace. "I knew I'd find you. I never lost faith." He kissed blonde hair, and held her at arm's length. "Now we can be together again."

"No." Her voice was little more than a whisper.

"No?" his smile never faltered. "Michelle, I forgive you for leaving me. Whatever it was that made you leave, we'll sort out. We'll be happy again."

"I was never...." Her objection died on her lips as he crushed her to his chest again.

"Is there anything you need to take?" he asked.

Rocky managed to pull away from him. "I can't leave."

"And why is that?" he asked patiently.

"My... friend."

"The tall woman I saw leave a moment ago?"

Rocky nodded, and realised he had waited until she was alone.

He smiled again, the same smile she had seen in her nightmares. "I waited for her to go, because I knew seeing you alone would be safer. I wouldn't want anything to happen should she object to you choosing to leave with me." He waited a moment for Rocky to think about what he was saying. "Would you rather we waited?"

"Would you hurt her?" Rocky asked, her voice breaking.

"If she came between us, Michelle. I would have to."

Rocky closed her eyes. "I have to get a coat. That's all I have."

"Very well." He followed the girl as she ascended the stairs, and stood in the hallway as she reached for her coat.

Rocky hesitated, and bypassed her own coat and took Jo's jacket from the hook. She draped it over her arm, and turned back to the man. "Can I leave a note?"

"I'm sorry, Michelle. A clean break, I think that would be the best."

She nodded, and took the hand that he offered.

"Let's go home," he said, and led her down the stairs and out of the house.

It was nearly two hours before Jo returned to her house, and she almost had a head-on collision with a Red VW Beetle as she turned into the courtyard. Both cars skidded in the snow, and Jo peered through the snow-smeared windscreen to see her friend behind the wheel of the dumpy car.

She waved at Harry, indicating she should reverse, and when she did she eased the Merc across the slippery courtyard and flipped the remote for the garage door.

"Where were you going?" asked Jo as she closed the garage and opened the front door.

Harry parked the car and locked it. "Home," she said. "There was no answer, so I was giving up. Just came round to see how your trip went."

"Rocky's up there." She stood back, holding the door open, and allowed the smaller woman to pass her and go on ahead.

"Well, maybe she didn't hear me."

Jo shrugged, and climbed the stairs behind her friend. "Rocky!" she called as she got to the top and walked past her friend. She looked back at Harry. "Hold on, I'll go find her."

Harry went into the lounge, pulling off her coat as she went. She heard Jo's footfalls upstairs, going from room to room. She sat on the sofa, and used the remote to turn on the TV. The weather forecast was on, and in the present conditions made for interesting viewing. She heard Jo pass the lounge and go back down the stairs.

A few moments later Jo appeared in the doorway, an unreadable expression on her face. "She's gone." She moved across to the large armchair and slumped down in it.

Harry watched as Jo sat quietly, her hands folded in her lap, her eyes fixed on the Christmas tree. The lights weren't lit, so she stood and walked over, leaning behind the tree to turn them on at the wall socket.

Then she returned to her place on the chair.

"Maybe she had to pop out," Harry said, and almost winced when she saw the pain in the blue eyes that settled on her.

"I would have done anything for her." Jo's voice was strangled. "Anything she wanted."

Harry stood and took a couple of steps across the room so she could sit on the arm of Jo's chair. "Why are you so sure she's gone?" she asked, laying a gentle hand on Jo's taut shoulder.

Jo covered her face with her hands, so Harry had to strain to hear what she said.

"She would have left a note.... And things she said.... In Cornwall."

"Like what?"

Jo leaned her head against the back of the chair, suddenly incredibly weary. She sighed. "She didn't like being a burden." Tears rolled down her cheeks. "I should never have left... her alone."

Harry was at a loss. She'd witnessed for herself the absolute joy her friend had displayed in the company of the small blonde, and now she was witnessing utter despair.

"I've heard sometimes, that these people can't handle going back to a normal life...." Harry was cut short when outraged blue eyes turned on her.

"What the hell do you mean, `these people`? You're talking about Rocky. She's a person, someone I came to know and love, and you're talking about her like she's some kind of statistic. Jesus Christ, Harry." Jo looked away from her.

"I'm sorry." Harry slipped her hand from Jo's shoulder, but remained sitting on the arm of the chair. "You... d'you want to go looking for her?"

Jo shook her head; her anger had gone as quickly as it arrived, replaced by a sense of resignation. "No, if she wants to disappear she knows how to do it. She did it successfully for five years." She sighed. "I don't know what I did wrong."

"Nothing, you did nothing wrong."

"It was too fast. Everything. I should have waited, let her do things at her pace." She massaged aching temples with trembling hands. "Just something else in my life I've fucked up."

The ringing of the telephone interrupted Jo's self-loathing. "Can you get that?" she asked Harry. "Whoever it is, tell them I'm asleep, or dead, whatever you like."

Harry sighed, gave Jo's shoulder a squeeze and reached across to the low coffee table for the phone.

"Hello?" Harry listened, she could hear only breathing. Uneven breathing. She put her hand over the mouthpiece. "It's a breather."

Jo reached out. "Give it to me."

Harry handed Jo the phone and returned to her seat on the sofa.

"Who is this?" Jo listened carefully, hearing the breathing, hearing the caller take in a long shuddering breath. "Rocky?"

No answer, just the sound of ragged breathing.

"Rocky, sweetheart. Is that you? Please, talk to me. Tell me where you are." She still heard nothing. Then suddenly a beep. She recognised it as the sound a cell phone makes to warn the user that the battery is getting low. "Rocky, you have my phone?" Jo stood and went into the hall; her jacket had gone, and she knew she'd left the phone in the pocket. She slid down the wall, the palm of her hand pressed to her forehead. "Rocky, whatever is wrong, we can work it out. Please, tell me where you are."

"I'm sorry."

"Baby, don't be sorry, just come home."

"I can't, I'm sorry."

Another beep. "Rocky, I love you."

Silence for a long moment. "I'm... sorry."

"Are you in London?"

"No."

"I don't understand, Rocky. I thought you were happy. Was it something I did?"

"I have to go."

"Go? Go where? Please, tell me where you are."

"He's waiting for me."

The breath was sucked from Jo's chest, and she expected her stomach to expel its contents at any second. "Who's waiting for you?"

"I just needed to say goodbye."

"He found you?"

Silence. Then, "He said he'd hurt you."

"He can't possibly hurt me more than I'm hurting right now." She waited a moment, then did something she'd never done before. "I'm begging you, Rocky."

"I'm sorry."

"I love you, Sweetheart."

Silence.

"I'll find you."

"No."

"I will find you."

"Please, Jo. He'll hurt you, he'll...."

The line went dead, and Jo threw the phone across the hallway, watching with satisfaction as it broke into two parts.

Harry appeared at her side, crouching down next to her trembling friend. "I'm guessing that was Rocky."

"He's got her."

Harry winced at the pain she heard in Jo's voice. "Who's got her, Jo?"

Jo turned red-rimmed blue eyes on her friend. "Her uncle, the man she ran away from."

"Jesus, I didn't know."

"What do I do now?"

Harry stood, looking down at the slumped woman. "You go get her."

Jo laughed, wiping her wet face with both hands. "Sounds simple." She leaned her head back against the wall. "She went with him." She sighed, a sound of finality.

"What if she didn't have a choice?"

The image of her lover being dragged from the house suddenly burned itself into her consciousness. "Oh my God."

"Jo, do you know where he lives?" Harry reached down and pulled the taller woman to her feet.

"Leicester, somewhere. I don't even know his name." Jo pulled her hair back from her face. "I don't know what to do."