Coincidences (19 page)

‘Alice, darling.’

Alice looked at her as she
placed a spoon and fork next to her plate.

Stephanie knew she was taking a
risk, not really knowing if Alice had intended to talk about Roger again, but
she wanted to clear the air before they sat down to eat and to get an idea as
to what Alice was thinking. ‘Please sit down, dear.’ She took a deep breath as
Alice sat opposite her. ‘I... I’ve been worried about how you’ve been since...
Well, I know it came as a shock to you on Monday when I told you... Well, I’ve
been feeling really bad about—’

‘Don’t,’ interrupted Alice, ‘I’m
okay about it. In fact, that’s why I came over today—to say that I think I
understand why you didn’t tell me.’

They were both looking at their
plates of food, not eating. Stephanie breathed an audible sigh of relief.

‘I think I would have preferred
it if you told me when I was younger. It would have been easier,’ continued
Alice.

‘I know.’ Stephanie picked up
her fork. ‘I was wrong. But I can’t go back and change that. When you were
growing up, you hardly ever mentioned your father. I didn’t think you were
interested in looking for him. It was easier to carry on as we were.’

‘It may have been easier, but it
wasn’t necessarily right,’ said Alice. She raised her head and saw that
Stephanie was looking at her. Their eyes met momentarily, then Alice looked
back at her plate.

‘I’m sorry, Alice.’ Stephanie
took a mouthful of food. ‘The risotto is lovely,’ she said, hoping they could
now change the subject. It was painful for her to accept that Alice had not
really forgiven her. ‘You’d better start eating your food or it will get cold.’

Alice began to eat. Silence hung
between them.

‘This is very tasty. Where did
you learn to cook like this? It certainly wasn’t from me.’

‘Oh, it’s just a recipe that was
on the back of a packet of rice.’

Silence again.

Stephanie could not think of a
thing to say. In the past, the two women had happily eaten a meal together in
relative silence, not feeling the need to talk much. But somehow today was
different; it was like there was a barrier that had to be broken down so that
they could get back to their previous relationship. The only thing that could
break it down was interaction. Stephanie tried again to initiate a
conversation. ‘You’re going back to university soon, aren’t you?’

‘Yes.’

‘Have you seen many of your
friends during the summer break?’

‘Yes, I went to a party
yesterday,’ said Alice, thinking of Andrew.

‘A party? That’s nice.’

‘Yes, it was okay.’ She frowned
as she recalled the disastrous chat with Jane, the time she’d spent alone on
the sofa, and then the failed conversation with Andrew.

They finished their meal in
silence.

Stephanie stood up and cleared
away the plates. ‘Alice, I have some ice cream in the freezer if you’d like.’

‘No thanks.’

‘A cup of tea?’

‘Okay. I’ll make it,’ said
Alice, standing up.

‘No, don’t worry. I’ll make it.
You cooked the meal,’ said Stephanie. ‘Why don’t you go and sit in the front
room and I’ll bring the tea in. I think I have some of those chocolate biscuits
that you like, too.’

She felt relieved when Alice
left the kitchen. It had been so hard to talk to her. They used to be able to
chat freely about everything; Stephanie couldn’t get used to the icy feeling in
the air between them.

Stacking the dishes in the
dishwasher, she caught sight of the childhood photographs of Alice that were
displayed in the glass fronted cabinet. In one of the photographs, Roger’s arm
could be seen behind Alice. She recalled that he’d been in a bad mood that day,
snapping angrily at her when she tried to take a picture of him with Alice. He
had refused to be in the shot. Years ago, when Alice was still a child,
Stephanie would look at that photograph and instantly remember Roger. That
photograph had always served as a reminder of him. Thinking about it now, she
couldn’t understand why she kept it displayed. Perhaps, she mused, she wanted
to prove to herself that she could get by without him and that the memory of
him didn’t faze her. After all, he had been the one who had left. He had broken
the family apart; leaving his only child who was completely innocent, and never
even trying to contact her. Only a cold hearted man could do something so
callous. The photograph served as a reminder of what he had left behind; and in
a strange way, it helped Stephanie get through the hardest years.

She found Alice sitting on the sofa in the living room,
slightly hunched over and staring at her hands. Stephanie forced a smile as she
handed a cup of tea to her and sat down.

‘Does my dad have any brothers?’
Alice’s question was unexpected.

Stephanie shifted in her seat
and frowned. ‘No. He was an only child, like me,’ she said. ‘What’s on TV,
Alice?’ She tried to change the subject. Picking up the remote control, she
switched on the television and began to flick through the channels.

‘I met Jane at the party I went
to yesterday.’

‘Oh? Is she a friend of yours?’
asked Stephanie.

Alice looked at her as if she
had said something stupid. ‘No, Jane is the girl who was in the newspaper; the
one who looks like me. Her surname is Forester. That’s why I thought we might
be related.’

‘Alice, I’ve already told you
where I stand on this. You can look for your father, against my wishes, but I
don’t want to be a part of it.’ She leaned back on the sofa, taking a sip of
tea and looking at the TV.

‘I will need your help with some
things. You haven’t told me anything about him.’

‘Have you been watching
Coronation
Street
recently?’ asked Stephanie, ignoring her. ‘It’s very good.’

Alice looked towards the television
and sighed. ‘We have to talk about this,’ she said.

‘Shush, I’m watching this.’

Alice reached out and took the
remote control, turning off the television.

‘Alice!’ Stephanie looked at
her, her eyebrows raised.

‘Who else can tell me about my
dad? Maybe I should ask Rita?’

Stephanie reddened. ‘You have to
understand, darling, talking about that time in my life brings back bad
memories.’ Leaning forward, she placed her tea cup on the coffee table and
picked up the
TV Times
magazine that was lying there. She began flicking
through it, obviously not reading it.

‘I can understand that. I just
need a few answers and then I’ll look for him on my own, I promise.’

Stephanie sighed and put the
magazine on her lap. ‘What do you want to know?’

‘Jane said that her dad’s name
is Ken. Does my dad have any cousins called Ken, maybe?’

Stephanie looked at her hands
and then into Alice’s eyes. She closed her eyes briefly as if what she was
about to say was momentous. ‘Your father’s name is Ken.’

‘What?’ Alice’s mouth fell open.

‘His name is Ken—’

‘So who is Roger Forester? You
mean, he’s not my dad? Why did you say—’

‘Wait, let me explain—’

‘Explain? Explain? You were
supposed to explain everything to me on Monday but then you told me that Roger
is my dad—but now it’s Ken.’ Alice stood up quickly, almost knocking the coffee
table over. Her tea cup tipped over and the contents spilt onto the tablecloth,
painting the white fabric a dull beige colour. Neither woman appeared to notice
the tea which was dripping from the edge of the table onto the cream-coloured
carpet. Alice stood opposite Stephanie, who was still seated on the sofa. ‘So,
not only are you not my mum, but the man who I thought was my dad is not even
my dad!’ Alice’s face was red, and tears brimmed in her eyes. ‘Who is the man
in the photographs you showed me? Is he my dad? Is he Ken?’

‘Please, Alice, if you’d only
let me get a word in edgeways. Ken Forester is your dad; or to be more precise:
Ken Roger Forester. He always used his middle name as his first name. He didn’t
like the name “Ken”. I only found out that his first name was Ken a few weeks
before we married. Everyone knew him as Roger.’

Alice wiped her tears on her
sleeve, and looked visibly relaxed. ‘So, he
is
the same man.’ She sat
back down on the sofa. ‘I knew it.’

Stephanie shook her head and
shrugged her shoulders.

‘Jane must be related to me. My
dad must have other children. She must be my half-sister.’

‘You don’t know that for sure—’

‘Oh, come on, Mum; even you have
to agree there are far too many coincidences here. She must be my sister.’
Alice smiled.

Stephanie did not miss the fact
that Alice had called her “Mum” and she momentarily felt more secure. ‘I just
don’t want you to be disappointed.’

‘It’s exciting,’ said Alice, her
eyes full of joy. ‘I’ve got this whole new family that I didn’t know about.’

Stephanie frowned. ‘Alice; you
said you spoke to Jane at the party. Did she say anything else?’

‘Only that her dad wasn’t
married before.’ Her smile faded slightly. ‘So, Jane doesn’t know about us. I
suppose that explains why she looked at me as if I was strange. But I just know
she’ll be as excited as I am, to find out she has a sister. Who knows? Maybe
there are more of us... Dad might have other children.’

‘You’re getting carried away.
Even if Jane’s father is your father—’

‘He is.’

‘Hmm... even if he is; he has
obviously not told his new family that he has another child. He left us. You
already know what rejection feels like, I don’t want you to go through it
again.’

‘I’m old enough to deal with it.’
Alice shrugged. ‘Besides, my friend Jenny is going to try to find out more
about Jane. Jen’s boyfriend knows one of Jane’s friends; well, one of his
friend’s sisters knows her. So, I’ll soon find out where she lives. Then I can
get in touch with my dad.’

‘Just don’t set your heart on a
happy ending. I don’t want you to get hurt.’

Alice smiled at Stephanie.
‘Look, whatever happens, I still have you and that’s enough for me.’

Tears formed in Stephanie’s eyes
and she hugged Alice tightly as her mind clung on to the words she’d just
spoken. ‘You’ll always have me, darling.’

As Stephanie watched Alice leave the flat that evening,
aside from the sense of trepidation about her new determination to find Roger,
she also felt a sense of renewed hope, like the faintest hint of the sun trying
to break out from behind a sky thick with clouds. One thing that Roger and
Miranda could never take away was the fact that she had been Alice’s mother for
the past twenty-one years. She would always have that, no matter what.

Chapter Eleven

Thursday 21st August 1997

Alice arrived home from the bookstore at 6.30 p.m., and
went straight into the kitchen to put her take-away fried chicken onto a plate.
The past few days had taken their toll and she felt tired; almost jet-lagged.
It seemed that she had been existing in a different time zone to everyone else,
unable to sleep at night.

Just as she switched on the
television and settled herself on the sofa to eat, the telephone rang. It was
Jenny.

‘Hi Allie. Listen, me and Frank
are meeting up with Tony and his sister, Susie, for a meal tonight. Do you
wanna come?’

Alice remembered that Susie had
witnessed her conversation at the party with Jane. She felt herself blush. How
could she face meeting up with Susie again after that? But at the same time,
she knew it would be an opportunity to try to find out more about Jane.

‘Maybe,’ said Alice, still
mulling it over.

‘Oh, come on. You know what
Frank and Tony are like when they get together; I’ll be bored.’

‘But you can talk to Susie,’
said Alice.

Jenny replied, lowering her
voice as if to prevent anyone overhearing: ‘But I thought it would be an
opportunity for
you
to talk to Susie; you know, about Jane.’

‘It would—’

‘Great,’ interrupted Jenny.
‘We’ll be over to pick you up in about half an hour.’

‘But...’ Alice eyed her fried
chicken dinner, growing cold on the table in front of her. Jenny had already
put down the phone.

Alice put her dinner in the
fridge and waited tensely for Jenny and Frank to arrive.

At 7.15 the doorbell rang. Jenny
stood outside smiling. ‘Ready?’ she said, jovially.

‘Yes, I’ll just grab a jacket.’

As Alice stepped out of her flat
she saw that Tony and Susie were in Frank’s car with him.

‘Hello, Alice,’ said Frank as
she got into the back of the car. ‘How are you? Had any good dreams about
Andrew recently?’ He laughed.

‘Frank, stop it,’ said Jenny,
pushing him from behind.

‘Just kidding, Alice,’ he said.

‘You’ve met Tony and Susie
already, haven’t you?’ said Jenny.

‘Yes.’ Alice nodded towards
Susie who was sitting in the middle of the back seat. Frank was driving, and
Tony sat beside him in the front passenger seat.

Alice was glad that it was dark
in the car, as she could feel her face was flushed. She couldn’t help but
recall the way Susie had looked at her after she’d witnessed her conversation
with Jane.

Alice faced the window, giving
the appearance that she was enjoying the view, when really she was just hoping
that she didn’t feel this nervous when they got to the restaurant.

‘Pizza all right for everyone?’
asked Tony.

‘Yes,’ the others said in
unison.

Once inside the restaurant, they waited for a table to
become available. Tony and Frank were chatting about a mutual friend they knew,
and Susie had said something to Jenny which Alice didn’t quite catch, as she
was being distracted by her thoughts.

‘I totally agree,’ said Jenny.
‘Alice and I say that every time we’re out, don’t we?’