Coffee in Common (12 page)

"So do I," Marissa agreed, feeling a tinge of jealousy at Jillian's good fortune.

Marissa, a senior at Northeastern University and the youngest of the group at 22, was between boyfriends. She had joined them about eight months ago after a work-study stint at Metro Magazine led to a regular part-time job and a friendship with Marie.

"Where's he taking you?" Holly asked.

"I don't know. When he asked, I told him food was good and after that to surprise me. So I guess we'll be having dinner somewhere."

Shandra had the next question. "Are you planning to do the I'm-not-too-hungry-I'll-just-have-a-salad thing? I know I wouldn't be able to eat if he's really as great as you're making him out to be."

"More important, though," Marie interjected before Jillian could answer, "is…what are you going to wear?"

"Oh! You're right," Jillian said, "I haven't even thought about it."

"What about your red pantsuit?" Liz offered. "You look great in that."

"Yes," agreed Jenna, "or maybe that long black skirt that's slit to the thigh. You could wear it with that lacy white top you keep saving for a special occasion."

The conversation became almost frenzied as the women discussed clothes, shoes, accessories, hair, nails, make-up, what to eat, how to eat, what to talk about, and so much more that after ten minutes of it Jillian's head was spinning.

8:50 PM

Paul was blushing. He'd been blushing on and off since they'd left DHL and each time Priya noticed she broke out in another fit of giggles.

"You're loving this, aren't you?"

"You bet! I can't wait to see what happens tomorrow at work. You better get a handle on your imagination or you'll have to make up some pretty interesting explanations."

Paul groaned. "I know, I know. But every time I look at you I see you…you know."

"Naked on a bed having fun with lefty?"

She watched his already red cheeks burn scarlet.

"Come on, Priya. You have to stop that."

"All right, all right. I'll stop."

She sounded more contrite than she looked.

"I'm being mean and you've been so sweet tonight. I really do appreciate you listening to me, you know. It really did help to hear a man's view."

Earlier, as they walked the half-mile to the restaurant, they talked all the way. The conversation continued during dinner, with frequent breaks for Priya's deliberately embarrassing innuendo, and worse.

Now, as they enjoyed coffee and dessert, Priya was sure her decision to trust Paul had been correct. Over the course of the evening, she confided much of her past, including the men she'd dated and how she felt about meeting, and ultimately losing each of them. She spoke of her loneliness, her difficulty in making female friends. It seemed as if there was nothing too personal to discuss.

As she sipped her coffee, thinking, Priya appeared worried.

"Paul, did I mess things up between us tonight telling you about…?" She lifted her left hand. "I'll never forgive myself if I let having a little fun wreck a really good friendship."

"No, you didn't wreck anything."

"But now you'll always have that image of me in your mind and…"

"Priya, if I tell you something about myself, about guys in general, will you promise not to hold it against me?"

"Of course."

"No, I mean, you have to actually promise. Seriously."

"Okay, I promise not to hold against you whatever you are about to say."

"Right. Well then…Priya, almost every man you meet imagines you naked. Many probably go home at night and dream about you. Or worse, if you know what I mean."

It was Priya's turn to blush.

"That first day, as you struck that pose, I guarantee all three of us were imagining you standing there
au naturel
. I don't think any of us do it any longer, but once in a while I still wonder. I can't help it. Men can't help it. You're an exceptionally beautiful woman.

"You have this amazing face and an even more amazing body to go with it. A man would have to be dead not to notice you, not to want you based only on your physical attributes.

"But if a guy is lucky enough to get to know you it's even worse! If he finds out how bright, and funny, and talented you are, how decent a person you are, well, he'll imagine himself with you even though he knows he'll never have a chance.

"Those guys who dumped you recently are idiots, Priya. They're little boys with raging hormones and no brains. They scored big by convincing you to go out with them and then all they could think about was a quick piece of ass."

He stopped and shook his head. He appeared to be considering something.

"The only reason I'm telling you what I'm about to tell you Priya, is because you trusted me so much tonight I know I can trust you in return."

Priya's eyebrows arched as her head tilted slightly in curious anticipation.

"Do you remember about two weeks after you started working with us, there was a period where I kept having to leave early, or had some appointment during the day."

When she nodded, he continued.

"I was interviewing for another job. I wanted to leave Davis Phillips so I could ask you out. I was so enamored of you I was having a hard time sitting in the same room and not staring all day. I didn't get the job and I did get over the crush, but that's how much you affect people."

"My gosh, I never realized. I never noticed even a funny look from you."

"And that's the way I wanted it. Especially after what you did and said that first day. But it illustrates the point I've been trying to make this whole time. We can suppress it, we can even hide it well, but men are men and we cannot help wanting a beautiful woman. It doesn't matter that we're in love with someone else, we still feel the urge. That's why so many men cheat on their wives and girlfriends. They feel the desire and go for it. That doesn't excuse them, of course. But those jokes about the little head leading the big head are often true, Priya. Fortunately, they're not always true."

"I can't believe this." She held his eyes. "Are you telling me that all the men in this room right now are fantasizing about doing me?"

"No, of course not. Not all the men. Odds are some of them are gay."

She burst out laughing and reached over to lay her hand on his.

"You, too?" she asked.

"Nah. Right now I'm still focused on you and lefty."

Again she shook with delight.

When the laughter subsided she told him, "All this laughing has made me need to pee. Will you excuse me for a minute. Why don't you see about getting the check."

8:54 PM

The date-talk had shifted from the practical to the hypothetical. Speculation about where he'd be taking her and how they'd get there had grown so fantastic, Jillian was desperate to move the chatter away from her and Paul. She turned to Holly and asked, "So how did you get Jamal to let you out this week."

It was a running joke that Jamal had to be bribed to let his bride out of the house for her night with the girls. Each week, Holly would come up with one outrageous answer or another.

"I told him if he let me go I'd bring you all home tonight for a nine way. The poor guy couldn't even stand up to give me a hug when I left."

"Holy Mr. Happy, girl, you mean that man of yours could satisfy all of us?" Maggie was almost drooling at the thought.

Holly's wicked smile and raised eyebrows started a round of comments that had patrons at nearby tables wondering if they were dining in the company of a group of porn stars.

Speculation about Jamal's length, girth, talent, and ability was still going strong when a party of six across the restaurant rose to leave. On the other side of the now-vacant table, previously hidden from her view by the diners, sat a guy and the most beautiful Indian girl Jillian had ever seen.

Oh…is that him? It looks like him from the side. What's he doing here? With her! Are they on a date? Look at her…she must be a model or something…or an actress…maybe it's not him…maybe its just someone who looks like him from the side.

She shook her head slightly as if to clear it, willing the guy to turn so she could be sure. The stunning girl she could see full on. When she laughed at something the guy said, then reached over and laid her hand on his, she actually became more beautiful.

Jillian's throat was suddenly dry and her chest felt strangely empty. Again the guy said something and again the girl laughed.

Are they just friends? Business associates? No, they seem too close, too intimate. But it can't be him…it's just a side-view look-alike.

At that moment, the woman rose. Jillian saw the man turn his head to follow her as she walked away.

Oh lord, it
is
him…getting cozy with…a centerfold or a cover girl or…why would he be chasing me if he has her? Why would he call me…send me flowers…maybe…maybe…

She saw Paul catch the eye of the waiter and make a check mark in the air with his finger. Oblivious now to the discourse around her, she continued to stare at him, her mind racing with questions, for the few minutes it took for the waiter to bring the check and take his credit card.

Liz, who was sitting across from her, glanced over and was startled to see Jillian staring over her shoulder, the color drained from her face.

"Jilli! What's wrong? Are you sick? Are you…"

"It's him," she said, her voice not much more than a whisper.

Liz couldn't hear her over the conversations. She quickly shushed everyone.

"What'd you say, Jilli? I couldn't hear you. Are you okay?"

Everyone's attention focused on Jillian, who was still staring at Paul. The girl was returning to the table.

"It's him," she repeated. "He's here." She paused, then added, "With
her
."

Everyone followed her gaze in time to see a gorgeous woman rejoin a man at a table across the room.

"Who's here?" Holly asked. "You mean the guy over there with the Playboy model?"

Liz suddenly realized what was happening.

"That's Paul, isn't it? That guy with the knockout is Paul."

Jillian nodded. She watched the waiter return with the credit slip. Paul signed it and pocketed his card and receipt.

Why is this bothering me? What does it matter if he's here with someone else? We've never gone out. Just talked a few times. I have no hold on him, no rights to him, no reason to feel betrayed. But I do. I do. He said all those things to me. And the Callas.

 "That's Paul?" Marissa asked. "Wow, he really
is
cute."

Half the table glared at her.

"Are you okay, Jilli?" asked Maria.

Recovering her composure, she said quietly, "Yes, I'm fine. I was just taken by surprise. Everyone, please don't all stare at once, but that's Paul, the guy you've been hearing so much about." Then the tone of her voice took on a razor sharp edge as she added, "I don't know who…who
she
is."

And how can I ever compete with her?

Everyone rushed to say something, but she stopped them. "It doesn't matter who she is. I don't own him. I don't even really know him."

Her friends heard the sadness in her voice.

"Look," Marie said.

They all turned and saw Paul and his companion rise. They certainly seemed to be very friendly as he helped her on with her coat, donned his own jacket, then headed for the door.

The focus returned to Jillian, who was staring down at her drink. An unnatural quiet fell over the group as each considered what they'd just seen and what it might mean for their friend.

9:10 PM

Paul and Priya headed toward the subway station on the corner of the Common at Boylston and Tremont. They said little as they walked side-by-side. Each was trying to digest the way the evening had played out.

As they turned left at Stuart, neither was in a hurry to say goodnight. When they reached the subway, they found themselves lingering at the entrance.

Finally, Priya said, "If you're not in a hurry to get home, would you like to walk off some of those calories we just enjoyed?"

"Sure!"

Both recognized their friendship had become something more that night, although neither really understood yet exactly what that "more" was.

For her part, Priya had never before spoken so intimately with a man. Such conversations had always been reserved for her few female acquaintances, and even then, not to the depths of intimacy she'd reached with Paul tonight.

How did this happen? Am I so desperate for friends that one boozy slip of the tongue made me bare my soul like that? Or…is there something about him I never noticed before, something that just put me at ease? Oh no! Is it more serious than that? Am I starting to fall for him? No, he's not interested in me. But he sure was right about seeing things from a different perspective. Even his questions. It was like he was trying to get me to consider alternatives, not just be supportive like girls usually do.

And he was so attentive. He listened…really listened. No guy ever focused on me that way before…like…like I had his complete attention…like I was the only thing on his mind. Maybe that's was what made me blab so many personal things.

Now I really feel bad about all those comments. The poor guy was red-faced all night. But it was so great to let go for once. I never felt so free before! I never let a man get that close to my center. Why did I do it tonight? I don't know…there was just something about him that made me feel safe. Oh Shiva! Of course! He made me feel safe. And comfortable. Those other guys would have been all over me if I'd been so free, so suggestive with them. Ugghh…that pig Mike especially. He could never understand me the way Paul does. Paul is such a…Oh! Oh dear…

As they ambled along the path, Paul kept stealing sideways glances at Priya.

She hasn't said much since we left the restaurant…but I guess neither have I. Maybe she regrets telling me so much about herself. Man, I can't believe it…no girl's ever opened up like that before…it was freakin' amazing. Who knew women thought about that kind of stuff? And she's a virgin! A freakin' virgin! Man, what a waste of a great body. Ah, crap. Now you're thinking like those jerks she went out with. Shit…she really laid it all out there tonight. It was like…like seeing her naked without taking off her clothes. Man! I can't freakin' get over it.