Clothes, Clothes, Clothes. Music, Music, Music. Boys, Boys, Boys. (50 page)

Jeanette Winterson,
Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

I picture my journey through life as a circle, as if I am travelling around a sphere, like an orange. I started at the bottom and began to climb up the side, becoming more confident as I went along. Sometimes life got difficult and I was hanging upside down, traversing it as best I could. When I reached the top, I tipped over and began to go down the other side. This part of the journey seems to be going faster. I find I’m drawn to behaviours and people that remind me of my past; even if they’re difficult, they’re familiar. I recognise some of my parents’ traits creeping into my character. My true nature – which I suppressed in order to function and succeed as an adult – is surfacing again. I’m shy and inclined to introversion. Still I keep on travelling to the underside of the orange, no way to stop it.

This is where I am at the moment – Winter 2013

A great relationship with my smart, beautiful daughter, my sister and my mother.

A couple of good loyal friends.

A small income and a home/room of my own.

The freedom to create.

I never sit outside my house not wanting to go in, rather I hate to leave it.

I’ve rebuilt my health.

I’m a good weight (no more FFFs).

Occasional confidence that I can cope with anything.

Occasional despair and loneliness, no big deal, not as bad as flu.

Lovely pool of talented musicians to work with.

Playing some great shows.

Wonder who to put as next of kin on hospital forms.

I still believe in love.

CLOTHES MUSIC BOYS

This is not a comprehensive list of the clothes, music or boys I was into, but it gives a flavour.

NB: I haven’t shagged everyone in the ‘Boys’ sections. Many are included either because they were a musical influence, I fancied them or they were just around at the time. I haven’t included the unpleasant ones.

1963–66: Home and Primary School

Clothes
: Black patent T-bar shoes, long white socks and shirt-waisted dress for parties. Maroon twill and gabardine school uniform. White ankle socks, blue leather Clarks sandals, hand-knitted cardigans, Woolworth’s jeans and T-shirts for playing in Highgate woods. Purple cord skirt and jacket and ‘Donovan-style’ purple cap, black leather knee-high boots, op-art dress from C&A, op-art pendants, long hair parted in the middle, homemade capes. Crocheted tights, Levi’s, elephant-cord mini skirts from Kids in Gear, Carnaby Street. Hair: dried over the open oven.

Music
: Hymns, ‘Bobby’s Girl’, ‘Seven Little Girls’, ‘Rawhide’, ‘My Boomerang Won’t Come Back’, ‘Sea of Love’ by Marty Wilde (all given to me by my cousin Sally). The Swingle Singers, Georgie Fame, the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the Small Faces, the Kinks, Them, the Walker Brothers, the Yardbirds, the Moody Blues, Bob Dylan, Dusty Springfield, Marvin Gaye, the Four Tops, Otis Redding, the Troggs, the Beach Boys, Dave Berry, Percy Sledge, Tamla Motown, Sandy Shaw, Marvin Gaye.

Boys
: Lucien (Albert) Albertine, Colin and Raymond, John Lennon.

1967–74: Senior School, Woodcraft, Amsterdam, Dingwalls, Art School

Clothes
: Ex-military stuff from Laurence Corner. Fluorescent pink tights from Mr Freedom, black mini skirt, shrunken black angora jumper from jumble sales. Black suede over knee boots, striped T-shirts and stripey tights, all from Biba. Cheese-cloth maxi skirts, and T-shirts from Kensington Market. Shoes and boots from Terry de Havilland and Anello and Davide. Hand-studded Wrangler denim jeans, tight denim jacket. Platform boots and shoes from Ravel. Maria Schneider perm (
Last Tango in Paris
): Molton Brown.

Music
: Ska (through skinheads at school), protest songs, Pete Seeger, Bob Dylan, Country Joe and the Fish, Taj Mahal, Richie Havens, Ewan MacColl, Nick Drake, Tim Hardin, John and Beverley Martyn, Steve Miller Band, Gil Scott-Heron, Hawkwind, Cat Stevens, Carole King, Thunderclap Newman, Melanie, Philadelphia Soul, the Doors, Captain Beefheart, Fleetwood Mac, King Crimson, the Incredible String Band, the Soft Machine, Henry Cow, Edgar Broughton Band, White Noise, the Pretty Things, Pink Floyd, Neil Young, James Taylor, the Small Faces (
Ogdens’ Nut Gone Flake
), Marvin Gaye (
What’s Going On
), David Bowie (
Hunky Dory
), Syd Barrett, glam rock, pub rock (Kilburn and the High Roads, Dr Feelgood), Northern Soul, Frank Zappa (I knew every Zappa song like it was a pop song, same with Syd Barrett), Cream, Traffic, Bob Marley and the Wailers, Steely Dan, Sparks, Tim Buckley, Sly and the Family Stone, Sam Dees.

Boys
: Mark (Magnus) Irvin, Maurice (Amsterdam), Nic Boatman, Ben Barson, Rory Johnston, Steve Mann (influential DJ at Dingwalls), Russell Hunter, Brandi Alexander, Jan Hart.

1975: Hammersmith and Early ‘Punk’

Clothes
: Narrow-legged jeans, home-printed T-shirts, customised leopard-print and lurex clothes from jumble sales. Baby-blue handmade cowboy boots, Converse trainers. Tight, fitted, checked jacket, shrunken T-shirts. Mohair jumper from jumble sale, combat trousers. Brown leather bomber jacket. Hair: Keith at Smile.

Music
: Roxy Music, the New York Dolls, David Bowie, Patti Smith, Esther Phillips, Lou Reed, Can, Kraftwerk, Television, Jonathan Richman, Mott the Hoople, the Ramones, Iggy and the Stooges.

Boys
: Rory Johnston, Mick Jones, Keith Levene.

Summer 1976–79: The Flowers of Romance and the Slits

Clothes
: Sex: black leather jeans, rubber stockings, pink patent boots, tits T-shirt, cowboy T-shirt, mohair jumper. London Leatherman: studded belts and wristbands. Customised black string vest with Durex fringe. Old black leather jacket. Dr Marten boots, Spalding and Converse trainers, torn boys’ T-shirts, tutus, little girls’ party dresses, customised fringed tights. Leather mini skirt. Hair: Keith Levene.

Music
: Velvet Underground, Ramones, Iggy (
The Idiot
), Bowie (
Low
), Lou Reed (
Metal Machine Music
), Eno, Patti Smith, Suicide, reggae (dub and lovers’ rock), the Sex Pistols, the Heartbreakers, the Clash, musicals,
Dionne Warwick Sings Burt Bacharach
, the New York Dolls, the Ramones, Television, Richard Hell and the Voidoids, Black Uhuru, sound systems (Jah Shaka, Sir Coxone, Moa Anbessa, Stereograph), the Carpenters, bit of disco – Gorgio Moroder, the Bee Gees – Linton Kwesi Johnson, reggae played by Don Letts (DJ at the Roxy).

Boys
: Mick Jones, Johnny Thunders, Keith Levene, Joe Strummer, Paul Simonon, Sid Vicious, John Lydon, Don Letts.

1979–81: Simply
What’s Happening
Tour to the End of the Slits

Clothes
: Ethnic fabrics from Brixton, Stephen Linard, Betsey Johnson, Scott Crolla and Georgina Godley, Vivienne Westwood. Converse trainers, Dr Martens, Santini and Dominici Mary Janes, Vivienne Westwood boots. Hair: matted.

Music
: Reggae (lovers’ rock and dub), ‘world music’ and jazz (Fela Kuti, Sun Ra, Eddie Harris, Olatunji, Dollar Brand, Don Cherry). Improvised music (Company, Steve Beresford, Derek Bailey, Fred Frith, Maarten van Regteren Altena, Tristan Honsinger, Anthony Braxton, Evan Parker, Lol Coxhill, Han Bennink, John Zorn, Steve Noble), Parliament, Chic, Bootsy Collins, This Heat, PiL, the Last Poets, Dionne Warwick, the Pop Group, Rip Rig and Panic, Dennis Brown, Dennis Bovell, Pharoah Sanders, Miles Davis (
Bitches Brew
), Ornette Coleman (
Dancing in Your Head
).

Boys
: Steve Beresford, Gareth Sager (the Pop Group), Dick O’Dell, Bruce Smith, Budgie, Dennis Bovell.

1982–84: Lost, Teaching Aerobics

Clothes
: Boring.

Music
: None. Listened to LBC and BBC Radio 4 (talk-only radio stations).

Boys
: None.

1985–95: Film School, Directing, Fall in Love

Clothes
: 1980s stuff. Lots of money, always down South Molton Street – Alaia, Romeo Gigli, Katharine Hamnett, Margaret Howell, Donna Karan, Sybilla. Shoes: Manolo Blahnik, Patrick Cox, Stephane Kélian, Robert Clergerie. Hair: Daniel Galvin.

Music
: Jeff Buckley, Prince, Madonna, Philip Glass, Radiohead, Beth Orton, Nirvana, BAD, Mazzy Star, Van Morrison, Abdullah Ibrahim, Neneh Cherry, the Sugarcubes, lots of tribal and ethnic music – Romanian, Inuit, African.

Boys
: Jeb Loy Nichols (good mate), Malcolm McLaren, Oliver Curtis (from film school), Dom Lobo (cute runner), the Biker.

1996–2007: Marry, IVF, Cancer, Become a Mother, Family Life

Clothes
: 7 for All Mankind jeans, T-shirts from Velvet and Whistles. Agnes B, Joseph, Prada. Addicted to TK Maxx. TAG watch. Gucci for evening. Tod’s loafers, Prada boots and trainers, Hunter wellies and Nick Ashley puffa jacket for walks on beach. Wetsuit. Hair: Aveda.

Music
: Pop because of daughter (all the
Now
… series; chart music really good at this time), Mika, Gossip, No Doubt, Keane, Bon Iver, Fleet Foxes, Kate Bush, Yoko Ono, the Libertines, Macy Gray, Mazzy Star, Guillemots, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Devendra Banhart, Aaron Neville, the Ting Tings, Albert Hammond Jnr, Björk.

Boys
: Husband, doctors (Dr Anthony Silverstone, Prof. Jeffrey Tobias, Dr Shah), Vincent Gallo (sort of a doctor).

2008–13: Art School, Divorce, Music, Film, Book

Clothes
: Black Gap jeans, Prada jackets/boots, Clarks desert boots, Topshop, James Perse T-shirts, Phillip Lim, Acne, Christopher Kane for being fancy. David Preston boots. Sue Ryder/Oxfam/ charity shops. Lots of vintage shoes and clothes. Not into bags. Hair: local salon in Hackney, or Kennaland when I can afford it.

Music
: Still listen to Syd Barrett, Marvin Gaye, Tamla Motown, and all the old jazz, blues and soul stuff. Chris Watson (
El Tren Fantasma
), Apparat, Warpaint, Micachu and the Shapes, Leila Arab, Steve Mason, Oval (Markus Popp), the XX, Beach House, Broadcast, Kate Bush, Scout Niblett, Beyoncé, Robert Wyatt, Chuck D, Lauryn Hill and Yuka Honda.

Boys
: Made friends with men again through working with them, which is nice. Kissed a few frogs – surely not many more to go now until I find a prince. Well, at least no more nutters (please, god), I’ve kissed enough of those …

ILLUSTRATIONS

Side One

1. Mum and Dad, courtesy of the author

2. Viv and her sister, courtesy of the author

3. Viv in junior-school uniform, courtesy of the author

4. The gang, courtesy of the author

5. Mark, courtesy of Mark (Magnus) Irvin

6. Ben, courtesy of Ben Barson

7. Paul, Nic, Viv and Maggie in Yugoslavia, 1968, courtesy of the author

8. Tickets, courtesy of the author

9. Viv, aged sixteen, courtesy of the author

10. Jan Hart, courtesy of the author

11. Viv at art school, courtesy of the author

12. Mick Jones, aged about seventeen, courtesy of the author

13. Viv and Mick Jones, 1976, by Jane Ashley

14. Viv and Paul Simonon, 1976, by Jane Ashley

15. Viv at the Stowaway club, 1978, by David Smitham

16. Viv with Don Letts, courtesy of the author

17. Roxy Club membership card, courtesy of the author

18. Viv with Gibson Les Paul Junior, courtesy of the author

19. Viv, Keith Levene and Mick Jones walking down Davis Road, 1975, courtesy of the author

20. Sid, courtesy of the author

21. Viv in tits T-shirt from Sex, by Ray Stevenson

22. Viv making tea at her Fulham studio, by Crystal Clear

23. Viv and Sid

24. Speakeasy membership card, courtesy of the author

25. Louise membership card, courtesy of the author

26. Viv in ballet tights, by Ray Stevenson

27. Excerpt from a letter by Sid Vicious, courtesy of the author

28. Johnny Thunders, 1976, by Roberta Bayley © Getty Images

29. Thunders in action, 1977, courtesy of the author

30. Viv, by Kenny Morris

31. The Slits. Photograph by Caroline Coon © Camera Press London

32. Viv and Ari, courtesy of the author

33. Ari dancing, 1980 © David Corio (www.davidcorio.com)

34. Rob Symmons from Subway Sect, 1977, courtesy of Rob Symmons

35. Postcard from Mick Jones, courtesy of the author